Autism/ADHD Support Thread 🌈

[wrenbow]

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If you want an official diagnosis in order to get accommodations or simply for your own peace of mind then it can be good idea, but there's a reason self-diagnosis is so accepted within the community!

The current method for diagnosing autism is pretty outdated and pathologising and is very much based on stereotypes so it's especially poor at detecting autism in high-masking adults. A lot of medical professionals also don't know much about autism outside of stereotypes so you can get turned away just because you can make eye contact and hold a conversation, or even because you're a woman and they still think women can't be autistic.

There's also unfortunately not much that you get out of a diagnosis. There's not much help available unless you need accommodations at work (which you can sometimes get just by asking) or disability benefits (which I'm not sure are guaranteed even with a diagnosis), and otherwise it's just a mark on your medical record which you may not want to have for various reasons. So basically unless it's necessary or you really want it, for many people it's not really worth a ridiculously long waiting list and/or paying a huge amount of money to pursue one.

I think if you've properly done your research and you're confident that you're autistic, especially if you have therapists agreeing with you, then there's honestly a very low chance that you're wrong and there would be nothing wrong with referring to yourself as such. Even if you don't feel comfortable with the label, there's nothing stopping you from using tips and resources for autistic people if they give you the help you need. Personally I've found the most helpful resource to be the autistic community itself. People are always sharing personal experiences, studies, coping mechanisms and other information, and all of this is accessible to anyone who needs it.

There's so much more I could say but this has already got really long. Basically you can obviously still seek a diagnosis if you want, but don't worry about it too much because the things that will likely help you the most don't require one and you'll still be accepted in the community regardless. If you're still not sure then I would just do some more research and give yourself more time to determine whether this is the best explanation for what you're going through. I hope you figure it out!

 

[Envy]

I know I have ADHD, it has been diagnosed. I tried taking a variety of medications to help with the symptoms but I couldn't tell a difference while taking them.

Recently I've suspected that I may be mildly autistic as well. I'm not self-diagnosing myself, though. I talked to my therapist about it, and the symptoms I've been having (like my mindset of routines in my job and otherwise that I get VERY upset if interrupted, my social anxiety, and aversion to touch, etc), she then gave some suggestions of where to go to get tested.

I decided that maybe it wasn't the smartest idea to get myself diagnosed when the government in my state is the way it is right now - very intrusive and also very discriminatory. I'm already a part of a couple of minorities that my state hates, I don't want to add another one... Maybe when I move to a more liberal state, I'll think of getting tested and finding out, but for now I am holding off.

 

[.: Meri :.]

There's also unfortunately not much that you get out of a diagnosis. There's not much help available unless you need accommodations at work (which you can sometimes get just by asking) or disability benefits (which I'm not sure are guaranteed even with a diagnosis), and otherwise it's just a mark on your medical record which you may not want to have for various reasons. So basically unless it's necessary or you really want it, for many people it's not really worth a ridiculously long waiting list and/or paying a huge amount of money to pursue one.

^I've seriously suspected I might be autistic for a few years now, but I'm avoiding pursuing a diagnosis because of this, at least for now. A major reason for me is that any disability diagnosis can unfortunately impede your ability to move to another country, and since I'd ideally like to move to Canada with my family sometime in the near-ish future... yeah.
Once I get into therapy I'll probably discuss it in more depth then for my own personal confirmation, but I honestly don't want an official medical diagnosis. There's too many ways it could be used against me and very few, if any, ways it could help me.

 

[daringred_]

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yeah, the questionnaire i took seemed very stereotypical and based more on outdated beliefs. as a woman who's very good at masking, it doesn't surprise me that i might just be written off by an everyday GP. where i currently volunteer, you can just ask for accommodations without needing an official diagnosis because a lot of volunteers there are also autistic (if not neurodivergent) themselves, but that isn't always the case everywhere, and i'd be apprehensive to ask about whether a prospective workplace offers accommodation/extra help because they might reject you based on needing it. (i know it's illegal to reject someone based on disability etc. but there's nothing to stop them from giving a different reason to cover it, like claiming you're just not what they're looking for in general.)

i'll probably bring it up at least once more, but i'm not going to push it after if it goes nowhere, because i don't think there's much that can be done about my symptoms anyway, since they generally don't interfere with my daily life. masking is super draining, especially as someone with chronic fatigue, but there's nothing that can be done about that until society itself starts becoming more accepting, sadly. if nothing else, i'd like the diagnosis more for peace of mind and because of impostor syndrome, but it definitely feels inconsequential (even detrimental, sometimes) in the long-run.

 

[wrenbow]

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That's very fair. It's great that you're volunteering somewhere with lots of other neurodivergent people! If you're comfortable with it then it sounds like that would be the ideal place to safely unmask a little.

For smaller accommodations I tend to not bring up my autism at all (most people don't have a good idea of what it is anyway so I don't really want to deal with people saying "but you don't look autistic???" or suddenly talking down to me) but I usually just explain the specific thing that I have trouble with, e.g. "I really struggle with phone calls/spoken instructions, could you email me/write this down instead?", "I get easily overwhelmed in group settings, could I sit this one out/go somewhere quiet for a while?", "I can't focus with a lot of background noise, would it be okay for me to wear headphones?". Any reasonable person should be fine with you asking for these things, although obviously not everyone is reasonable, but hopefully wording things like this will get you a little extra help.

 

[xSuperMario64x]

I think it's safe to say that self-diagnoses are not inherently bad. after all, you know more about yourself than anyone else, so if you suspect that you're autistic/ADHD then you can do some research and/or talk to other people in the community about it, and go from there.


I got my diagnosis when I was in 7th grade I believe, so I didn't have much of a choice as to whether or not that goes on my record. now that someone else has brought up the prospect of that diagnosis on my record making it difficult to move out of the country, I feel just a bit worried. I really hope I don't encounter any issues like that in the future not that I know for sure that I'll be moving out of the US, but I'd like to be able to keep my options open.

 

[.: Meri :.]

I think it's safe to say that self-diagnoses are not inherently bad. after all, you know more about yourself than anyone else, so if you suspect that you're autistic/ADHD then you can do some research and/or talk to other people in the community about it, and go from there.


I got my diagnosis when I was in 7th grade I believe, so I didn't have much of a choice as to whether or not that goes on my record. now that someone else has brought up the prospect of that diagnosis on my record making it difficult to move out of the country, I feel just a bit worried. I really hope I don't encounter any issues like that in the future not that I know for sure that I'll be moving out of the US, but I'd like to be able to keep my options open.

If it's any reassurance, there's a UN agreement (that Canada is apart of) that expressly states they're not allowed to discriminate against immigrants for any form of disability. I'm being a bit cynical in that I don't really trust that (like how corporations aren't supposed to discriminate in hiring either), but it's really not supposed to affect your ability to get in, and there's probably a very good chance that it won't at all.
I don't know if you're also looking at Canada or somewhere else, but if it's the former then things like being young, knowing French, and getting a job/going to school in Canada can be a huge help towards gaining citizenship. I'll be wishing you the best in any case!

 

[Midoriya]

Yeah, even though I was professionally diagnosed with stage 1 autism at a young age, like others have said, self-diagnosing isn't inherently bad. It can be very useful if you don't have the time, money, or energy to get professionally diagnosed yet, or don't want to.

Can't say I know much about it being a blemish on my record though. I've never really encountered problems with it so far, and I'm not sure if I'll be moving to another country in the future or not. It is good to know though.

 

[Shawna]

-snip-

Loud noises drive me insane too, so I know how you feel. ^^
Unfortunately, people can be insensitive and ignorant about that. ;-;

-snip-

I can relate. I get really enamored with words and whatnot too. XDDDD For example, I cannot stop using the word "rigmarole". I have been using it a lot in a server I am in with my two best online friends, and now they are constantly using it too. XDDDD I love having that influence on people

-snip-

Yep! I get really, really enamored with certain fictional characters at times, so it is easy for me to do this. For example, during my Ripslinger (from Planes) phase in 2017-2019, I would listen to "We Are The Champions" by Queen, and I couldn't help but think of him. ^^ And recently, I discovered that there is apparently an Army Song (I didn't even listen to it), and the first thing I thought about was Tankman (or John Captain, as his real name is), who is my current comfort character and F/O. <333

-snip-

I don't blame you. I was in this situation once myself. For context, I stated that I didn't have friends on the school bus (I am not even in school anymore, I am just for past reference). My brother was like "Well, make some." and yeah, I kinda took it as him being ignorant. Not only that, but we had assigned seats, which makes things even harder.

-snip-

I agree honestly. ^^ I do think proper research and self-assessment should be done, but I think it is important to keep track of your symptoms and correspond them to the symptoms of the disorder, condition, etc. you are suspecting you have. It could help your doctor when you go in for a professional diagnosis.

. . .​

I don't know if I have posted this on here yet, but for the past year or so, I have been suspecting that I have ADHD. Let's see:

• I got distracted easily
• I had a hard time sitting still, and I get fidgety
• I zone out easily
• I get impatient/antsy for stuff
• I have a hard time paying attention for extended periods of time

Pretty soon, I should be looked at by a doctor. I really hope the mental aspect will be done as well.

 

[Captain Jigglypuff]

My abuser was the absolute worst when it came to being a self martyr for taking care of me. She didn’t exactly try to do the whole Munchausen by proxy thing and make me undergo unnecessary medical treatments for mostly imagined problems but she did like to exaggerate things to the psychiatrist and therapists. She convinced them that I had a nonexistent addiction which luck there is no actual medicine given to combat this specific addiction and she’d make normal kid stuff that I did that she didn’t like seem more like a massive problem that needed to be corrected such as me sneaking into my older sister’s room and going through everything or playing the Floor is Lava game by myself in the grocery store with the floor tiles because I was bored. And she told people lies about how “awful” it was to take care of me because then she got sympathy from others. There were some truth to some of the problems she said I had such as telling the psychiatrist for years that I had symptoms of being fixated on certain things for years and seemed to be obsessed with certain things but I wasn’t doing any unusual rituals such as flushing the toilet four times before leaving the bathroom or washing my hands every ten minutes. It’s a strange situation that she put me through as there were times where she would refuse to let me go to school because something abnormal would happen and she’d take me to the doctor only to Be told that I was fine. She’d then let me go to school the next day at least and it isn’t like this happened every week.

 

[VanitasFan26]

I feel like sometimes whenever I make a big deal out of everything I was always gaslighted into thinking that "You should not be so hyper" and "Its not a big deal get over it". Since when I was a child I've been bottling up my emotions. I never once expressed to everyone how I really feel because the moment when they ask me "Are you okay" and then I respond what my issue is I just get a dimissive response like "Its no big deal you'll get used to it". I have always isolated myself from people because I was at the point where no one understood me at all. I tend to stutter alot in real life when speaking and people tend to misunderstand me or take what I say out of context and use it against me. My ex friends and ex best friends did this to me acting like they understood me but in reality they never did and just abandoned me. Then finally when I heard those dreadful words from that teacher in school saying "Nobody wants to hear about your problems" that was the straw that broke the camals back. Its hard for me to open up when there are people who are always so dismissive about what you're going through. This is one of the reasons being autistic is so hard becuase I have reasons to express how I really feel and yet I just get brushed off as if I'm going crazy. Its hard to open up these days.

 

[Drawdler]

Wow, I stumbled onto this video and finally an explanation for what being autistic is like that almost whole-heartedly clicks with me.

I wish I had something like this when I was growing up. People should focus more on the good aspects of it, without going to the extreme of savant syndrome (imo that brings the narrative that autistic people have to go even further above and beyond to be worth any tolerance, which is BS).

If I had support like this, and reinforcement that I was doing something right or had some good ideas, I wouldn’t be so repelled by my own wonky diagnosis.
I still don’t know about that diagnosis I got when I was younger, terrible conditions for it. I’d still rather not mention it irl, because it sucks how differently people can instantly treat you over it, or keep emphasising it. Plus, I’d rather just explain how I am and that I have whatevertraits. This video is actually me though. I’ve sent my psychologist a lot of (unrelated) stuff to look at, but I’ll have to summarise this one for her, or push this one lol.

 

[Shawna]

Some other reasons why I suspect I have ADHD:

* I have what I call an active mind. I am always thinking about a million things at once. I recently found out that ADHD hyperactivity can be mental, which I can definitely relate to. Believe me, my brain is very hectic.

* I don't know if this can be linked to ADHD, but as you guys have noticed, I have been known to go off on a tangent and ramble on and on and on in a lot of my posts on here. XDDD

 

[Midoriya]

Wow, I stumbled onto this video and finally an explanation for what being autistic is like that almost whole-heartedly clicks with me.

I wish I had something like this when I was growing up. People should focus more on the good aspects of it, without going to the extreme of savant syndrome (imo that brings the narrative that autistic people have to go even further above and beyond to be worth any tolerance, which is BS).

If I had support like this, and reinforcement that I was doing something right or had some good ideas, I wouldn’t be so repelled by my own wonky diagnosis.
I still don’t know about that diagnosis I got when I was younger, terrible conditions for it. I’d still rather not mention it irl, because it sucks how differently people can instantly treat you over it, or keep emphasising it. Plus, I’d rather just explain how I am and that I have whatevertraits. This video is actually me though. I’ve sent my psychologist a lot of (unrelated) stuff to look at, but I’ll have to summarise this one for her, or push this one lol.

I watched this finally and it was actually pretty good. I already knew about most of the things described, but I can definitely see how the video is helpful to others. I'd recommend anyone to watch it, whether they're neurotypical or neurodivergent. Thanks for sharing.

 

[Elov]

I really want to start seeking an official diagnosis for autism. I've been suspecting it for several years now, and have been probably obsessed/hyperfixated on the notion for over a year now, where it's something I research and read up on daily. What initially tipped me off on it was when I was speaking to a psychologist, and he told me have I ever considered I might be autistic, when I finally opened up with some of my social difficulties I've had throughout life.. I initially dismissed it because I had such a limited understanding of it at the time. But the more and more I looked into it, and came to an understanding what it was, everything about myself and how I was the way I was finally made sense. I'm not the most functioning in my life. And I'm not very good at masking. I didn't even figure out how to mask or how I was acting socially/doing with my body language was what was putting people off until I was around 21... I'm really bad at interacting with others, and generally avoid it, unless absolutely necessary. But now that I have included autism into my understanding of myself, I've been improving and understanding my behaviors and others so much more, and have learned so much more on what I need to do in order to be "accepted more" socially, and what to do when I'm overstimulated, etc.. And why I've struggled so much socially virtually my entire life. I'm really hoping with getting diagnosed, and hopefully working on building social skills, and understanding people more and better managing meltdowns etc, through therapy I'll be able to cope and function better in life.. I've been heavily relying on others for support since graduating high school, and I want to finally start being more independent now.

 

[Shawna]

If all goes well, I should go see a psychiatrist next month for an assessment ^_^
I already know I am somehow on the spectrum, but I do not know where.

Post automatically merged: Oct 26, 2023

I really want to start seeking an official diagnosis for autism. I've been suspecting it for several years now, and have been probably obsessed/hyperfixated on the notion for over a year now, where it's something I research and read up on daily. What initially tipped me off on it was when I was speaking to a psychologist, and he told me have I ever considered I might be autistic, when I finally opened up with some of my social difficulties I've had throughout life.. I initially dismissed it because I had such a limited understanding of it at the time. But the more and more I looked into it, and came to an understanding what it was, everything about myself and how I was the way I was finally made sense. I'm not the most functioning in my life. And I'm not very good at masking. I didn't even figure out how to mask or how I was acting socially/doing with my body language was what was putting people off until I was around 21... I'm really bad at interacting with others, and generally avoid it, unless absolutely necessary. But now that I have included autism into my understanding of myself, I've been improving and understanding my behaviors and others so much more, and have learned so much more on what I need to do in order to be "accepted more" socially, and what to do when I'm overstimulated, etc.. And why I've struggled so much socially virtually my entire life. I'm really hoping with getting diagnosed, and hopefully working on building social skills, and understanding people more and better managing meltdowns etc, through therapy I'll be able to cope and function better in life.. I've been heavily relying on others for support since graduating high school, and I want to finally start being more independent now.

Same here. I hope I can eventually be independent enough to get my own place. I would have a lot more freedom. ^_^

 

[VanitasFan26]

I just need to get this off my chest because this makes me angry. It makes my blood boil when some people try to make autistic people like me look stupid. I've seen a lot of memes and stuff on the Internet saying that autistic people are "stupid" and "full of it".

Nobody took me seriously even though I was doing my best to fit in and yet people assume I was making up stuff to get attention. The reality is that I didn't want to talk to people I was forced to join groups in school because apparently teachers think everyone should be socializing. I felt like an outcast and feeling like the whole world was against me.

I was told "nobody wants to hear about your problems" from a disgruntled teacher so I kept myself quiet. I never spoke to anyone nor I even tried to even talk to anyone else. I was made fun of but I've grown used to it.

 

[Kitsuragi]

glad this thread came back up bc... well

i already ranted about this in the whats bothering you topic. but omfg, the adderall shortage is kicking me down HARD. i've had to go a few days without it before, and i'd found it just made my brain super foggy and i was tired. but lately? i had to go without it for almost 2 weeks now, and it's been HORRIBLE. i was CONSTANTLY depressed. didn't want to get out of bed, didn't wanna cook anything, i just scrolled tiktok for hours and looked at art online. hardly even spoke to anyone.

the executive dysfunction was already bad enough without it, only got worse. i really REALLY hope the shortage is fixed soon. i do not want to let it get that bad again. and of course you cant get more than a 30 days supply so it's really SOL.

 

[BobRocks20]

I have a question: does anyone else here believe that Elon Musk is autistic? My family always brings him up when they're helping me out with my autism. They say he used to be like me before he went on to become one of the richest people in the world. TBH, being compared to the same man who opened up to hate speech on Twitter/X gives me chills...

 

[SkyKnight03]

I have a question: does anyone else here believe that Elon Musk is autistic? My family always brings him up when they're helping me out with my autism. They say he used to be like me before he went on to become one of the richest people in the world. TBH, being compared to the same man who opened up to hate speech on Twitter/X gives me chills...

My aunt does this. She mixes the definition of introvert for autism. Hence she self diagnoses celebrities and many of our relatives. It's exhausting to listen to her.

I will say - When your family compares you to Elon Musk, it's very unlikely the hate speech is something they consider. It's more so that they see positive aspects in him that they see in you.

Since the world isn't black and white, there are good and bad aspects of everybody. This is why it's tricky to be compared to anybody. I don't enjoy it either. After all, we are our own people with our own unique identities.