What's Bothering You?

[mogyay]

the heating system in my flat is so old that it's basically random at this point if it decides to give me hot water or not I've been waiting on it being hot enough for a shower for like 20 mins and I need to leaaaaave soon

 

[Giddy]

Yesterday was such a rollercoaster of good and bad things, it's crazy to think I have to sorta seperate things that happened in two posts.

At work I burnt my hand fully with hot milk, was multitasking as I held the milk jug, and I forgot that heat pole thing was chaotic and randomally heated it to a point that it spilt everywhere, so quickly put it under water before finishing off the drink. Stung for a few hours after. I don't think anyone noticed it happen either.

After work, me and my mum travelled out the city to go visit my cousin's grave, as it was my aunt's birthday yesterday and aparently my aunt's ashes were put there with her son who passed.
But when we got to the gravestone, it was hard to tell if my other cousin was lying to us about that because my cousins grave was in such a bad way as if they haven't come to see him in YEARS. (Either my cousin or their dad, who is the one who owns the gravestone hasn't seemed to been there in ages.) You couldn't even see anything, so me and mum had to stay longer and remove leafs, rubble, dead flowers and took over nearly two hours. The ground was really wet as well. So we were really angry and fustrated that it was left in such an awful state, my aunt would've been so angry. It was definitely an emotional situation. Luckily we bought a lot of waste bags to remove everything. And then finally added the flowers we bought.

Couldn't help but look over at the other graves, and how sad it must've been. Some old, really old graves were covered in ivy, on grave had a whole tree growing from it, and I kinda wished I could help clean some old graves that had no one visiting them; you know?

My cousin called my mum as she planned to call today, but obvs didn't know we were going to the grave, until my mum told her just then.
My mum's water bottle leaked and my sandwiches were ruined. :/

I also had my UC call that day at 3pm, but stayed so long at the graveyard, my phone was off because the phone they had on my details is old and likes to waste its battery so I turned it off, I only remembered an hour after. :/ Hope this doesn't affect me, I had to explain why I missed the call and explained as much as I could.

Such a tiring day, my shoulder blades, feet and ankles were in so much pain and I had to sleep early that night just to heal.

 

[bestfriendsally]

AGH!!!!!

LIGHTWORKS! PLEASE STOP FREEZING ON YOUR OWN RANDOMLY SOMETIMES & CLOSING YOURSELF!! WHY YOU DO THAT?! > <


(sigh~ sigh ~ .... i'm sorry for the caps/shouting.... it's just REALLY frustrating....

but i can always go back in & everything is fine, somehow

)

 

[Tude]

@Zerous hope everyone is okay

 

[VulpineVengeance]

Whenever I'm sick I get panicky and anxious from being alone and not feeling well. I'm feeling a lot better today but I'm mad that even walking around for a few minutes makes me nauseous

 

[xSuperMario64x]

--

 

[Devicho]

my surgery is in about two weeks, and while I am excited to finally have it done, I am NOT prepared for the pain and recovery and emotional rollercoaster that will inevitably ensue. I'm mostly upset because I've been working out for a few weeks now, and I feel myself getting stronger every time I go, and I won't be able to do that for a while after my surgery. I also won't be able to play pickleball for a while. I'm also wondering how I'll cope when I'm practically bed ridden for a week, and I don't know how long I have to wait to drive or go to work, and I'm sure I'll have some restrictions for a few weeks or months.

I know this will change my life for the better, but I'm worried I might become depressed from not being able to get up and go like I usually do. I hope I don't become an emotional wreck, and I hope that people don't use those emotions to say "haha I told you so."

oh, and I'm worried about how my dad will react. not because I care, but because I imagine he might start to berate me and tell me it was a bad idea. I dreamed about it last night. I live with him so I can't avoid it.

Best of luck with the recovery. I'm still technically in recovery from my own laparoscopic surgery, and I don't know what type of surgery you're planning to undergo, but I want to say definitely try to cut yourself some slack while you're recovering. Not being able to do certain things for a little while is a bummer, but it might be a good time to engage in some hobbies that aren't physically intensive; watching some interesting shows or movies, replaying an old favorite game, catching up on some reading... It may be a decent idea to gather up some things to occupy your time in advance while you're able to.


As for what I originally came to post: I'm going to be restarting antidepressants tonight, I guess. I'm kind of frustrated that it seems like I'm just going to have to lean on them after being okay for a few years, but I guess there's not that much else I can really do. I can tell the depression has its claws in me again, because it's been hard to look forward to much of anything, none of my hobbies have been bringing me a lot of joy, and it's difficult to force myself to even take care of myself properly. I'm just hoping that the medication is as effective as it was last time, because 2025 so far has been really wearing me down, and it's not even spring yet.

 

[mogyay]

I have a weird sense of impending doom, it's such a strange feeling - I'm normally very rational but I can't shake this feeling that something bad is going to happen soon

 

[chocovelvetcake]

I just realized that I got pinged for an Among Us session in a thread and completely forgot about it until now. I don't really play Among Us that much, but I'm pretty sure it's already too late to join. ;-;

I have been playing a lot of Mario Party Jamboree lately, but as far as I know, there hasn't really been any active sessions as of late.

 

[skarmoury]

good news: i have slept for 9 hours (my sleep debt is paid)

bad news: i have the worst headache imaginable and i am already an hour behind my lectures

i feel like death right now but i gotta drag myself out of bed because my daily schedule started an hour ago oh my god

 

[~Kilza~]

 

[Suguri]

I already posted something similar in my profile but I've a lot to deal with. And also, the forums don't feel the same. I only came here to have fun... :[

Well, see you on the 29th.

 

[Tude]

I already posted something similar in my profile but I've a lot to deal with. And also, the forums don't feel the same. I only came here to have fun... :[

Well, see you on the 29th.

Happy birthday! Sorry I missed it.

 

[Doo]

-snip-

Take a break if you need, there’s never any pressure to stick around. I dont know exactly what your role is but you as a person are more important to us than the running of the forum. That’s not to say we don’t appreciate and like having you here. Just take care, because we care

 

[Chris]

I don't want to go to work today. I'm so burned out and need the world to just pause for a while. In my field, this time of year is referred to as "Mad March" - and it is so fitting. Everyone is so tense trying to meet external deadlines. I hope my schedule for mid-week looks quiet - if so I might be able to book a day or two off to just focus on my mental health. Late week there is no chance as I need to prep for the three days I'm out of department training next week. Can the world just stop for a minute. Please?

 

[xSuperMario64x]

--

 

[Devicho]

It's probably a really unhealthy way to look at things, but there are so many ways that I feel like an "other" all at once that it's no wonder I feel out of place. Asexual, aromantic, don't want kids, not trans but don't feel socially connected to my gender at all, estranged from family, more of an old-school nerd than anything, and just to add to the pile I have a really disruptive sleep disorder that typically just affects blind people, but in sighted people mostly affects men. I get that every person is different, but geez, man, how different did I need to be?

 

[-Apples-]

There’s no responses, no updates, and nothing new today.

 

[chocovelvetcake]

I lowkey feel inferior to my younger sister. She's only 14, but I feel like she's better than me in just about everything. It's bad enough that I've been comparing myself to my 20 year old sister for all these years, and now I'm comparing myself to both of my younger sisters.

It seems like no matter how successful I am, I always feel the need to compare myself to my brothers and sisters and see how well they're doing compared to me. I guess you can say I have some kind of inferiority complex when it comes to my siblings.

Also on a side note, I find myself being jealous of other women most of the time, as I'm almost never jealous of men. I just noticed that.

 

[himekirako]

my allergies !!!!!!! are going crazy today !!!!
my eyes are itchy and my nose is itchy "(-⌓-)

i took an allergy med a little while ago, really hoping it'll kick in soon ( ,,,’･~･’,,)