What's Bothering You?

Birthdays and Christmas's really do show you who your true friends are. I've not had a single "Happy Birthday" message/text from any of my friends, yet I log on here and find some lovely messages from some wonderful forum members.
Sometimes it's like that. Sorry that you had to feel that way during your special day. It probably doesn't help much hearing this from some random member, but Happy Birthday! I hope you were able to spend some time to enjoy yourself and treat yourself to some tasty cake and fun times.

And if you haven't yet, just call it an extended birthday and celebrate it this weekend.
 
I'm still not feeling great from COVID- granted my symptoms only started a week ago. I was feeling pretty good yesterday and earlier today, now my head feels like it's going to explode due to the pressure inside. Ugh, I'm like an instant pot. At least my fever is gone.
 
I've made contact with the outside world again! I'm flying back to my hometown for a week to escape the madness. I still feel very hypervigilant and like a utilities service is going to fail at any time. It's been exhausting. Hopefully when I return in a weeks time things will be relatively normal.
 
had plans today but isolated when no one texted me
i don't do well if there isn't a discussed time for meetup .. .

is it adhd? i just freeze sometimes, especially when my social battery is low
 
had plans today but isolated when no one texted me
i don't do well if there isn't a discussed time for meetup .. .

is it adhd? i just freeze sometimes, especially when my social battery is low
I'm not sure. I'm not a doctor or anything, but adhd is normally about concentration/focus. Sorry that things didn't go as you planned today! It's late now, but maybe treat yourself by watching a favorite movie/show or one that you've been wanting to see. Hope you feel better!
 
I feel like I don’t have any meaningful friendships which is pretty embarrassing at my age. If you asked me to name three good friends I’ve formed in my lifetime, I couldn’t. I screwed myself not forming any friendships when I was younger. It’s weird inserting myself into already formed friend groups as an adult and feeling like you’re not one of them. It’s so complicated but I wish I knew what having friends felt like. I wish I knew what it was like to go out and do things.
 
went to the asian market today. I got a bunch of stuff, but all the anime merch and plushies were expensive.
 
I was by Kroger's yesterday and the price for Hot Cheetos is now $5.19 it used to be $4.99 before. This price gouging is really going out of control.
Inflation sucks. I work in a warehouse and a lot of the stuff we ship out to different stores has really went up. Those big barrels of party mix, chips, pretzels, cheeseballs ect used to be like $5 and now they're $9. It's insane how people continue to support it. If they'd just stop the companies would drop the price reluctantly, but this only encourages them to rise the price again for some stupid reason that has no relation to their company or product.

It's like how Twitter is trying to force people to pay for password security, which is also illegal, but Elon has the buyers remorse so bad. Lots of people are abandoning ship in March when this happens and I am all for watching this idiot get what he deserves.

I feel like I don’t have any meaningful friendships which is pretty embarrassing at my age. If you asked me to name three good friends I’ve formed in my lifetime, I couldn’t. I screwed myself not forming any friendships when I was younger. It’s weird inserting myself into already formed friend groups as an adult and feeling like you’re not one of them. It’s so complicated but I wish I knew what having friends felt like. I wish I knew what it was like to go out and do things.
I think that happens to all of us at some point. A lot of the people I was really close to and had great friendships with have drifted. Some of them don't even live in the same place/states anymore. Others changed so drastically that it was like walking on eggshells trying not to set them off and I realized it was time to let them go. So you didn't screw yourself. If you ask any one person how many childhood friends they still keep in touch with, there won't be a lot.

We're always forming new friendships. It's not as easy to do that when you're a young adult and not in school anymore where all of your peers were stuck in the same place for 8ish hours. I remember you mentioning how you travel to places a lot. So it's not like you aren't going out and doing things.
 
Grandma pissed off because I didn’t sign her birthday card with my deadname. I don’t feel like I should have to. I did sign it but I didn’t use my deadname.
 
I know I don’t normally respond but I see your replies, and they mean a lot. I seem to talk about these things a lot in here. Things like this normally don’t bother me, but seeing other friend groups and how close people are just reminds me of how much I’m not. I guess in my mind, I really wish I had meaningful connections like that. I think travel is the one thing I’m into in which I had no outside influence to get into. I still wish I had a few side hobbies though because I feel like there’s nothing to me, but again, that feeling is amplified only when around other people.

I appreciate you taking the time to reply to my posts. I have been reading your replies and they do mean a lot. I’ve been thinking a lot of maybe joining a discord community (maybe for mental health/anxiety) but I’m not too sure if people are in there necessarily to make friends. I think I’d be an outsider.
 
im kind of super tired of my classmates pointing out ever single insecurity that i have. like, please shut up!!! leave me alone and go play with your b@lls or something idfk
 
A downside to having an abnormal sleeping schedule: One of the houses around here is getting a new roof. I don't think I can fall asleep with hammer noises...
 
Dunno if it was a good idea pimping my instant ramen with extra chili, garlic, and some lime juice but sure got nose liquid flowing lol
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oh and niantic being they most ****ty gaming company ever if this actually will happen
 
for a while I was going to bed at a decent time then not waking up til noon, and now I keep staying up super late and then waking up at like 10-11am. I only got 6 hours of sleep last night. idk why I can't go to sleep lately but I was up til 4am last night and I'm so tired today 😞
 
@Croconaw I get it. There are a lot of hobbies I do by myself because there's not a lot of people who want to do them. Like for example I sometimes participate in Civil War reenactments. Not so much anymore because the pandemic kind of killed it a bit, but normally I'd have to travel and fall in with some random group that is already there. Which is fun, but probably could be more fun if it was with friends or the old group I used to do it with that fell off.
 
I feel like I forgot stuff I learned in the lasy week and I went so far back my memory retention is not right and I feel alone in doing art ):
 
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