Would you like to get married? 💒

[Seastar]

I'm definitely never getting married. I've learned I can't even feel that way about other people. The closest I can get is with fictional characters and that's obviously not an option. Plus, I'm aroace.

 

[SleepyAmaurotine]

yes but strictly because i would get to dress up like a princess for 3 days

i’m kinda hesitant about it? i’ve never been in a relationship (when i was younger my parents didn’t want me dating, but when i became an adult they suddenly switched to “let us know if there’s a guy you like! ”, i still can’t tell if this is a trick question whenever they ask lmao) so i don’t really know how to go about this if they actually do expect me to find someone (also my anxiety and trust issues say don’t go out with anyone alone)

but also in my culture the wife has to move in with her husband’s family, so the idea of spending my whole life figuring out things with my own family but suddenly having to live with strangers is kinda scary since i guess i might have attachment issues and would rather stay with my family forever (if it was up to me, my husband would move in with my family or near them )

so i guess i’m not totally opposed to it? i just need someone who has similar interests or at least doesn’t expect me to toss all my collections/quit playing video games/etc.

 

[xSuperMario64x]

Most people don’t realize that marriage is a legal contract. You don’t sign a contract all willy nilly! They just have love in the brain. Then when it comes down to divorce, they’re flabbergasted at the cost, documents/info required,
and the lengthy process involved. I saw this all the time when I interned at a law firm.

this is basically the point I was trying to make. it's not just something you do, it's a very serious and important matter that many people don't take seriously enough. I've seen enough sad/failing marriages in my day to see how making such a decision on a whim can wind up disasterous.

 

[.: Meri :.]

Not for the sake of being married, but if I ever meet the right person, I think I would honestly love to. ;v; Realistically speaking, I'm not sure how financially feasible my wedding hopes are (not that I'd want a huge wedding, just, y'know, today's economy—would rather my hypothetical spouse and I have our own house), but at the very least I would want to have the legal benefits that come with a marriage if I'm that deeply in love with someone.
I'm also someone who feels like I could potentially fall in love with more than one person (and naturally don't mind if the same is true for my partner), but in most parts of the world marrying multiple people is, uh... Not Very Legal, to put it one way. So that's its own kind of concern for me, although thankfully I think there are alternate legal avenues to some of the marriage benefits I value most (like, medical decision type stuff), at least. Still, I'm enough of a romantic at heart that the idea of only being actually married to one of the people I'm in love with seems kind of painful. But we're getting pretty deep into the realm of hypotheticals at this point ahaha.

To answer the second question, I am absolutely a hopeless romantic. To the point where if I'm asked to describe myself it's one of the first things I would consider. Honestly, probably in the more general sense of the term "romantic", too. I try to stay at least somewhat grounded but it's easy for me to get swept off in idealism.

 

[boring]

Absolutely, but not soon. Its not economical in this environment but I truly adore my partner and see myself being with him for the rest of my life - 3 years in and nothing but love.

 

[Bui]

I have no desire at all to ever get married, or to even be in a relationship for that matter.

 

[Aniko]

I don't want to get married ever, marriage is not for me. The only people I know that are married are over 60, the boomers generation. I think it went out of fashion in my area, people are living together with kids and a house but don't get married anymore. I think it's because it's expensive and the divorce is even more expensive. My parents were married for maybe 16-17 years and fought every day and fought even more while their divorce and dragged us in court with them, and tried to use us as well ...ah...nope... nope... nope.
I want to live a peaceful life alone.

 

[Millysaurusrexjr]

I am happily married! I've been with my husband for 12 years, of those 12 years we have been married for 5 years, and before that, we were in a long-distance relationship for 6 years (Me being in the US, him in Australia). I met him by mere chance on Facebook and it's so crazy to think about how different my life would be... how different I as a person would be if I hadn't commented on some random stupid Jason Mraz post (I don't even like Jason Mraz). I almost didn't even accept my SO's friend request. Insane. I'm pretty sure if I hadn't met my husband I wouldn't even be on TBT He got me into gaming (though I am still a very casual gamer). He is my best friend and the love of my life for sure

 

[Midoriya]

Yeah, as long as there's arrangements beforehand (pre-nup) on what happens in case of a divorce and it's with the right person.

Fun fact time: My great-grandparents on my mom's side were married for over 75 years, longer than Disney has even existed. I got to meet them before they died and they seemed like the happiest people you'd ever meet, which is astounding. Sadly we don't live in those kinds of times anymore though.

 

[digimon]

That's not a proposal!

/jk lol i just had to ~

---

whew, i spent a while writing a response, then editing/deleting/revising my post but my thoughts boil down to these few points:

1. no, i don’t think i’ll ever get married, for many reasons but mostly due to the fact that i don’t really believe i have the capacity to feel/experience romantic love when it relates to me
- ironically at the same time, while i've never experienced romantic love, or felt it for anyone, i love the idea of romantic love and i like to think of myself as a romantic at heart. i absolutely love reading about romance/or celebrating the love that people have for each other. i just don’t see it for me in particular

2. marriage is great but i don't think it's necessary to prove that people are in a devoted, committed relationship. i think with time, society is shifting towards people seeing that they don't have to get married to be together long term. (personally seeing more and more people having long term, committed relationships for years and years without ever getting married.) and this isn't to shun people who chose to celebrate their love by getting married. it's a nice change to see though because i see it from the perspective of someone who is stuck in a super religious family where the end all be all goal is, and i quote: "to get married and obey and be obedient towards your husband" get real
- i rambled on but basically if you and your partner want to get married go for it, but don't let outside forces (family, religion, society) dictate what is right for you. if you are getting married for love, i think that's fantastic!

i think my stance on why marriage isn't really ever gonna be an option for me also stems from a lot of things that have happened in the past (which i won't get into on tbt dot com) and it's a kinda tainted the idea and ruined the chance of me ever seeing what a functional/healthy relationship is. it's hard to visualize something like that for yourself when you've never had an example to really go off but eh, such is life.

 

[CylieDanny]

Id love to be in a commited, long term relationship with someone ^^ Im not sure about marriage, maybe?

Alot of people in my family have been together for years, even have kids together, but they aren't married. I always saw myself like that.

I think Id like to be a parent more then be married, so hopefully my future partner would like to have some kids, and a life together ^^

 

[LadyDestani]

I'm happily married! We've been married 17 years, a couple for 20 years, and friends even longer than that. Our relationship evolved over time and I wouldn't have it any other way. We are still growing and evolving as partners, but at the heart of it all I know I'll always be married to my best friend.

Yes, I'm a sappy romantic! I love being in love, talking about love, writing about love, hearing about people in love, and celebrating love. I love weddings and always knew I wanted to be married if or when I found the right person. I didn't get married to have a huge spectacle and refused to go into debt for a wedding either. We had a small, budget-friendly celebration with close friends and family, but it was so special and perfect.

Besides love, I also knew I wanted to be married for legal purposes. When I found someone to spend the rest of my life with, I didn't want to leave any questions when it came to serious medical or end of life stuff. The legal contract part was important to me to make sure we were able to be together at the end and make decisions for each other if necessary. Getting married did absolutely nothing to change our relationship or the way we lived, but it did give me some peace of mind in case of future emergencies.

With all that said, I completely understand the other side. All those saying that they don't feel a need to get married to be in a committed relationship...you're right! The legal contract is just that and has no bearing on a healthy relationship. And it definitely should not be taken lightly or done frivolously. I think in a perfect world, there should be no need to get married. It should be completely optional while still providing life partners with all the same benefits that marriage does today.

I'm also someone who feels like I could potentially fall in love with more than one person (and naturally don't mind if the same is true for my partner), but in most parts of the world marrying multiple people is, uh... Not Very Legal, to put it one way.

I don't know if this is something you'd be interested in, but back when I was getting married I joined a forum. One of the girls on there had two partners and rather than doing a marriage, they did a handfasting ceremony. It may not have been a legal contract like marriage, but it was still a way for them to profess their love to each other.

 

[.: Meri :.]

I don't know if this is something you'd be interested in, but back when I was getting married I joined a forum. One of the girls on there had two partners and rather than doing a marriage, they did a handfasting ceremony. It may not have been a legal contract like marriage, but it was still a way for them to profess their love to each other.

Oh that sounds lovely! ;v; A ceremony like that would absolutely be something I'd want if a legal marriage wasn't an option, so thank you for mentioning it.

And congratulations to you and your husband by the way! I'll be wishing for you both to have many, many more happy years together.

 

[ali.di.magix]

I’m somewhere between Im not sure and I never want to get married. I see getting married as veeery unlikely for me considering I’m not interested in relationships and I’m aroace. I’m not totally opposed to marriage, I just don’t see it happening for me anytime soon.

I’m also pretty old fashioned in the sense that marriage is not a thing that you do on a whim; I would want to be 100% sure before making a commitment like that.

 

[DaisyFan]

I am aro ace (aromantic and asexual), so marriage is a big no for me.

 

[Darcy94x]

I do because when I was young nobody in my family was ever married or ever even stayed together. I’d like to feel pretty for at least one day in my life

 

[xSuperMario64x]

I am happily married! I've been with my husband for 12 years, of those 12 years we have been married for 5 years, and before that, we were in a long-distance relationship for 6 years (Me being in the US, him in Australia). I met him by mere chance on Facebook and it's so crazy to think about how different my life would be... how different I as a person would be if I hadn't commented on some random stupid Jason Mraz post (I don't even like Jason Mraz). I almost didn't even accept my SO's friend request. Insane. I'm pretty sure if I hadn't met my husband I wouldn't even be on TBT He got me into gaming (though I am still a very casual gamer). He is my best friend and the love of my life for sure

I'm happily married! We've been married 17 years, a couple for 20 years, and friends even longer than that. Our relationship evolved over time and I wouldn't have it any other way. We are still growing and evolving as partners, but at the heart of it all I know I'll always be married to my best friend.

okay but like yall are gonna make me cry for real, this is so adorable gskfhskfjs ️

 

[Envy]

I'm in my mid 30s now so I'm getting a bit old. I do want to find a partner and get married, but I really thought it would have happened by now... It seems like the ship has sailed. People pay no attention to me, I'm not attractive.

Also in my mid 30s I have become more settled in wanting to have a child, but with no luck in love and all I will be going through adoption and will just have to deal with the single mom life (which seeing other women who have gone down that road in my life has me anxious). Even doing that is a while out, as I for sure want to move and be more stabilized financially.

 

[azurill]

At one point I thought it would be nice to find someone and get married but at this point I don’t see it happening. I was in a few failed relationships and that made me realize I really don’t like being in a relationship. My last relationship was pretty toxic. Most relationships in my family don’t work out. I think it’s great and I am happy when someone finds their person but it’s just not for me. I’m definitely happier single.

 

[graceroxx]

shocked at the amount of aroaces in this thread omg. I have come to say... same here I've known I was ace since I was 14 and have more recently realized I'm a little more on the aro spectrum than I originally thought too. just the thought of a relationship makes me super uncomfortable, I can't fathom ever getting married.