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What's Bothering You?

CW: We have vomit in the story today, friends :( Blurred out for yalls well being.

I ate the spiciest dinner today... Like my throat was on fire kinda spicy and I was going *sssss hha ssss ha* between bites. It was Indian food. I order mild at this place but their mild is definitely like a hot. My roommate can handle heat extremely well (she eats so, so spicy I sometimes worry for her health lol) and even she admits this place's mild is pretty spicy. Even the restaurant admits their mild is spicy LOL. I can handle just enough heat but this is no joke the spiciest "mild" I have ever witnessed. I had lassi and raita between every bite... like... I was getting called out big time here. Ended dinner with a scoop of gelato and a cup of chai just to try to cool things down.

And I guess I ate too much because I had to beeline it to the toilet to vom. It was the projectile kind and it came up through my nose and OH did it burn. I've never felt a burn that painful before. I could feel the curries burning through my nasal passage... like I had to do the *sss ha sssss ha* between each vom session... I had tears in my eyes because it was so spicy. I had to hit my head because the heat was sending shivers of pain through the heat.

So now my nose is burnt and every time I breathe from it it feels like I've spent an entire day at the pool and my nose is broken from chlorine.
 
Today (well, yesterday) I learned that AMBER alerts and weather warnings have the same alarm sound. :,> (Maybe just in Canada? A friend of mine from Ontario told me they got an alert the same time I did.) I heard one earlier in the day and got really scared because I'm terrified of EAS alarms. I think it was just a tornado/thunderstorm warning, but I was still freaked out regardless.

Also, just Canada having crap weather (especially Eastern, AKA where I live). Forest fires, thunderstorms, tornadoes... I'm glad to have only gotten moderately severe thunderstorms, but I'm bracing for a natural disaster.
 
Today (well, yesterday) I learned that AMBER alerts and weather warnings have the same alarm sound. :,> (Maybe just in Canada? A friend of mine from Ontario told me they got an alert the same time I did.) I heard one earlier in the day and got really scared because I'm terrified of EAS alarms. I think it was just a tornado/thunderstorm warning, but I was still freaked out regardless.

Also, just Canada having crap weather (especially Eastern, AKA where I live). Forest fires, thunderstorms, tornadoes... I'm glad to have only gotten moderately severe thunderstorms, but I'm bracing for a natural disaster.
I turned off AMBER alerts so I don’t have to hear those sounds. But when I do hear those sounds (which I still do), it means we’re under a tornado warning or some flood warning.
 
idk what my problem is but I haven't felt this awful in a while, it's like I'm anxious and also physically ill. doesn't help that I had to get up for a bit to do something like an hour ago and now I can't go back to sleep, so I'm just wide awake at 6am now 🥲

edit: I'm still feeling kinda anxious but it's much better now than it was last night and this morning. I will say though, today will probably be exhausting again because I didn't sleep well at all last night. I'm just grateful the crippling anxiety is basically gone, for now at least.
 
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I've felt awful all week and I'm supposed to go celebrate my nephew's birthday today...(He's turning 16?? I can't believe it. I feel old.) I wanted to say tomorrow but it's already 5 AM.
I really hope I can ask to stay home. I just can't imagine going. I don't even like eating right now. Everything makes me feel worse. Oh yeah, I also have a migraine.
 
I do not like it when some certain puppy of ours touches me. I don’t like being touched by animals anyway, but the way the puppy touches me is very uncomfortable and invasive.
 
I’m getting bad again, but I feel like I have no reason to? Like I should just accept that people change and things happen, but this sort of thing always hits me hard. Add on trying to navigate a school twice as big as my old one and having absolutely no school spirit because all I think of is “isolation” when I walk in the building. (Who knew that going from a chill summer to a hard “week before school starts” without any warning whatsoever was going to be bad for someone with already bad mental health?)

I know I should be optimistic but I’m just... not. I don’t know what to do.
 
the dark backdrops for camp tbt make it really hard to see people’s usernames/titles :[
although, i’ve also had to start wearing my glasses while drawing, so i think my eyes are just getting worse… maybe i should wear my glasses more often
 
boy oh boy I love spending my mornings being practically stuck in the bathroom hafkshfk


also hoping one of my entries for this event will be accepted, I'm having a difficult time putting it together oops
 
I’m genuinely exhausted. Like physically and mentally. I had sleep paralysis last night and tbh with my lack of sleep these last 6/7 weeks I felt like I was waiting for it. I’m overwhelmed and burnt out. Trying my hardest to be positive🥺
 
I can’t decide a theme for my island, and sometimes I feel like I’m not good enough, and that I’m lazy and don’t work hard.
 
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