Mental Health Check

[banjokaboom]

Hey guys! Just wanted to post something in here, not specific to depression or anxiety, but general mental health to make sure y'all are doing okay. I'm constantly struggling with stress and anxiety around being a first-time dad during this pandemic as well as all the other stresses that come from working, raising a baby, and being stuck at home just about all day, every day.

The things I try to do to help alleviate some of the anxiety and stress, or at least to help me deal with it all, are self-reflection and "trimming the fat" so to speak. I used to be able to have a nice, relaxing back-road commute to work for 45 minutes each way, which helped me unwind, grab something sweet and spend time with my own thoughts to help me figure out the day or just generally calm down for the night. I can't do that with being stuck at home, so all I can really do is spend an hour or so with some headphones on focusing on one thing at a time. It's not always easy with a baby on the move, but hey we gotta try something, right?

Anyways, I'm no expert, but right now I'm realizing that there are things that I do that I thought I did out of enjoyment as an escape, but I really am starting to do them out of feeling necessary to do them. These things include...

• Posting daily updates in my Bear Isle and New Leaf threads
• Playing New Horizons every day
• Keeping up with discord and Twitter

It's not easy to step away from some of these things, but some tweaks I've made are...

• Removing the discord app from my home screen on my phone
• Acknowledging that I'm playing and posting every day because I feel that it's necessary, not because I have to, and choosing to not play.

I think subconsciously I play games because I think they help me calm down, but realistically I probably play games because it's what I'm used to doing and it may not be actually helping. I also have this strong urge to fit in and sometimes push myself to join groups or chat with people with similar interests on a regular basis to give myself a feeling of self-worth or just general acceptance from others, but I tend to push myself too hard and it starts to negatively impact me. Relationships of any kind are a lot of work and while I enjoy having friends and talking about my interests, I don't enjoy making people uncomfortable or feeling like I'm forcing myself or others into being liked/liking me. Starts to not feel genuine and I'm really about honesty and integrity. I have a tendency of wearing my heart on my sleeve and I'm not one to hide how I'm feeling.

Some things that Animal Crossing does help with is the social aspects of life. If I play the games to just chat with villagers and hang out, it can be fun and relaxing. I also have a tendency of spending money when I'm stressed/depressed and having the ability to buy things and give gifts in these games without spending real money is really therapeutic in a way. Also sending letters into the void about how I'm feeling is helpful to be able to write and not worry about being judged.

Overall I'd probably say my mental health is at about /10, where some stressors can't be removed from my life but I need to find a way to balance stress and relaxation, but where there is still love and support in my life, and things that bring me happiness every day.

That's my mental health update. How are y'all doing, cha-chomp?

 

[DarkDesertFox]

I can relate to a lot of your post. I had a commute time around the same amount as yours, but ever since I have been working from home I have barely been driving at all. I definitely enjoy the extra time I have for sure not driving, but I also miss it just a bit because it was a sanctuary for my thoughts and a buffer zone. While I do love video games a ton, I think I definitely play them as much as I do because it's what I'm used to doing too. I'm not really venturing out from my comfort zone because my free time is so precious I am afraid of wasting it. My mental health as of late has not been doing so great. My workplace is very understaffed and we are all overworked, the stress of the elections is starting to get to me and COVID having my family at home constantly is becoming a little much. I am also taking over an account for 6 weeks for my work place soon that I hate with a burning passion so that's going to be rough. Congrats on being a first time dad!

 

[xSuperMario64x]

I've been struggling a lot with my mental health and it's been getting worse and worse since my senior year of high school. that was the first year that I really began to experience symptoms of depression, and I think at this point it's evolved into dysthymia because while I was home for winter break I was pretty much completely disinterested in everything and I had an impending sense of... doom, I guess? not in a suicidal way or anything, I was just at the lowest lows of depression and I felt trapped. I've kinda been feeling this way for a while but it's gotten worse in the last month or so. It doesn't help that I'm no longer taking any medication for mental health (I used to take something for anxiety but it did nothing to help w depression, plus the person who prescribed it to me left my college so I just quit taking it).

I know a big part of that major depressive episode I had for a while was the fact that I was at home dealing with my dad, who emotionally acts like he doesn't care about anybody at all. things started to heat up around the time that Trump incited the riot at the capital, since he was actually an indirect participant of that (he went to the state house to protest) and made me feel like an idiot for being against it. He would go on to tell me things like "Liberals are self-absorbed and stupid" and he would get upset every time I tried to say anything regarding my political views (for context, he's a conservative republican and based on my recent political compass test I'm a leftist libertarian). that added on with the fact that he causes me and my physically ill mother so much emotional pain and never apologizes for the things he says, just made the whole at-home experience miserable for me.
I'm at my dorm now and I know I'm still dealing w depression because I still have a big disinterest in things I normally enjoy like playing video games and drawing, but I feel a hell of a lot better than I did at home because I don't have to deal w my dad anymore. that stress was actually worse than the stress I'm feeling related to schoolwork right now, which is pretty sad considering I'm an 8th semester student taking a lot of upper level courses which are highly mentally demanding of me. I can't wait to just cut my dad completely out of my life, he was an okay parent but he's a terrible friend and I don't want to associate him with my life anymore.

some advice I could give regarding mental health is don't force yourself to do things you're not comfortable with. my parents have always tried to convince me that going to see my friends or hang out with people irl would help my depression, but it actually makes it worse. I'm like 96% introverted so being alone is what really helps me. this can also apply to things you normally enjoy doing. think you want to play a video game but have no energy to do so? no problem, in that case I usually go on Pinterest and look at fan art of my favorite games, or I might even go on youtube and watch a video about someone talking about it. doesn't require much energy and it's a good way to ease away from a major depressive episode, at least for me. doing schoolwork often requires a lot of mental energy that I don't have so I try to combine it with something I enjoy, like listening to video game music or watching a yt video. nonetheless, only you know what's right for you. don't ignore the signals that your body/mind gives you (only ignore them if they're trash talking you).



anyways, sorry about the long winded post. I would say my mental health right now is probably a 4-5/10, still not great but at home I would've ranked it a 0-1/10 so I've made a bit of progress.

 

[ting1984]

I'm doing well. I take solace in faith, a strong marriage, what's left of my family, and the local church. I can no longer really work due to the pandemic and autism, but I keep busy at home while husband works from home. Thankfully the local church stays out of politics, other than to point out obvious evil, like what happened last month. I also stay away from arguing politics with others; I'm a little bit active with the American Solidarity Party, but that's about it. I avoid most social media. All these things together work well for keeping me hopeful and sane in today's divisive climate.

 

[Shawna]

I have been holding up pretty good for the most part, although the pandemic is upsetting for me at times, and we are currently experiencing some complications due to the Winter season, I am talking things that don't happen very often in Texas. But this should be over by Friday.

The main thing that upset me about the pandemic is the timing. I was so excited for our family (me, my, dad, and my brother) to move to West Texas and start anew, I was finally going to start the post-high school chapter of my life almost as soon as we moved out of my uncle's and into our own house, but it was thwarted by this pandemic.

I am so ready to go out regularly again and hang out with people that are my age and have the same mindset as me. Don't get me wrong, I appreciate having my online friends too, but it just it is not the same as going out and making/seeing friends in person.

. . .

Here are a few things that keep my spirits up and help me stay sane:
1. Drawing Fanart, Making Edits, etc.
2. Writing Fanfiction
3. Playing video games
4. Chatting with my friends on Discord
5. Putting myself in places online with people I can relate to

. . .

But there is hope.

The vaccines are slowly, but surely being rolled out to everyone. My grandparents actually got their second dosage a couple days ago.

 

[arikins]

i actually came out of a super depressive episode recently. around december/january (it went on from march-october)

Spoiler: TW

in october of 2020 i had my first attempt. my relationship was at its worst, the person who i was in a relationship with had also had their first attempt a month or so before. not going to go into the super bad parts of it as i can end up with a really bad night if i start rehashing last year. anyway, my experience in a mental hospital for a week and the intensive therapy im now doing, (personal therapist once a week & group therapy twice a week), ive been so much better. im also now on antidepressants which helps me get to the healthy coping skills instead of being in too much of a dark place to even do anything at all. 2020 has been the worst in my life, and i hope everything goes away soon. not seeing my friends and ex bf had taken the worst tole on me. my relationship fell to pieces and i lost 99% of my friends (still have two left lol)

ahh okay past the icky stuff. ive been spending so much time with my family. safe, of course. my relationship with my parents had actually been pretty horrible the past few years, but in recent months its been the best its ever been. ive gotten into baking, this entire community, playing my uke, caring for my wonderful pets and attending lots of therapy. lets all hope for a better year, or at least to us managing the best we can ^^

 

[BluebearL]

I have had two seperate viruses in a row without any recovery time that I still have not yet reached the turning point of and now I have an infection. It’s difficult because being able to exercise and run are really important for helping to keep my anxiety under control but I can’t at the moment because my body is fighting so many things I’ll only make it worse. My mental health could be and has been worse but it is really starting to grate on me when I can’t exercise.

 

[Midoriya]

I’ve struggled a lot with my mental health in the last year+ due to the pandemic, my mom’s death, my own situation, and now this snowstorm that’s happening. I’ve been depressed since last May and my sleep schedule has been messed up so that I could numb myself from the pain, and I’m just recently starting to come out of it... lol.

 

[xhyloh]

been struggling for a few years because of inability to afford a therapist/meds and i'm somehow managing..! having loved ones i can get in touch with definitely makes things easier

 

[Xara]

honestly, my mental health is always all over the place. while the pandemic certainly hasn’t helped much, the main thing that’s been affecting me is my mother’s health issues and her stubbornness when it comes to seeking out medical attention. it’s been infuriating and awful and scary and it’s far from being over. in regards to the pandemic, at first it felt like a blessing; it got me out of having to physically attend school which i was grateful for but a year later, i realize just how bad this situation is for me. this is a bit embarrassing but i’ve really let myself go; i have hardly any motivation, my hair is a tangled mess, the list goes on and on. i haven’t done any of the hobbies that i love in months (aside from what i wrote for tbt’s winter story contest, which i’m grateful for. writing felt nice after not doing it for long) and overall everything just kind of,, sucks lmao.

however, i’m trying to hang in there the best i can. i’ve been trying to be nicer to people which i think?? i’m doing okay at but theres always room for improvement. i talk to my friends and play animal crossing. i come on here as this really has become a sort of safe space for me and while i’m honestly just sort of existing at this point, i’m doing my best. i go to class when i can and do work when i can. i take my meds and am looking into therapy. my future is uncertain and i’m stressed and scared but i’m still here so,, i guess that’s something. :’)

 

[.: Meri :.]

Mine's a little shaky, but I think I'm doing a little better than I was a little while ago. I've been dealing with a lot of stress on top of depression and anxiety, and I'm coming to realize that I've had serious burnout for a long time, but I keep pushing myself so I've never fully recovered. I'm a lot better at preaching about being kind to yourself than I am at actually being kind to myself, so I'm going to keep working on that. I was also recently called out on my bad habit of comparing myself to others too much, and... they weren't wrong, so that's something else I'm going to try to be better about. I'd honestly like to start seeing a therapist about this stuff soon, but I'm just trying to hold out until my family's in a better situation to do so.

One thing I'm hoping to get the hang of is lucid dreaming—I have a lot of stressful anxiety dreams/nightmares, which means I don't sleep as well, so I don't do as well the next day. I haven't had any real success yet, but I'm going to keep trying because I think being able to control my dreams would be really good for my sleep quality and my mental health.

As for more concrete successes, I've revisited some of the things I loved as a child and started playing dress-up games and rewatching Winx Club episodes with my mom, ahaha. I wasn't really doing it as a self-care thing at first, but I've been pleasantly surprised by how much it's helped my mood. And, at risk of sounding sappy, posting more frequently on these forums has done wonders for me recently. I've been dealing with some pretty serious loneliness, and after an attempt at reconnecting with an old friend didn't work out, I was feeling pretty miserable. My usual coping strategies weren't working for me, so I decided to start posting on here just to interact with people a little more, and I've been doing much better since.

 

[DinosaurDumpster]

It used to be really bad.

Spoiler: 2020 was a big yikes-

During this time, lasted almost the whole year of 2020 (and made a small appearance again in 2021), I was stuck. Tried to draw to cope with it but it made it worse in my opinion. I have a decently long list of fears, and sharp objects is one of them. Whenever I tried to harm myself it was always with a fork or butter knife, or i'd just scratch myself.
I had bad dreams. One of them, was when me and my sister went to an audition. She made it on the spot, and shoved me to the ground, and called me a loser, laughing in my face while walking into the other room.

During the last couple weeks of this dark episode I had, I managed to have a panic attack during a test (it was actually all day in school, it was just more severe during this time). This was weird to me, since I never get nervous for tests or exams. I was shaking so bad the assistant teacher noticed from across the room.
I didn't talk to anyone really in my friend groups, I could barely speak when ordering food, and my whole life was just a mess. Also, my mom told me my dream job wasn't a career which made me feel a lot worse, especially coming from my own mother.
To make things worse, I didn't really have anyone to talk to. I convinced myself that everyone was just telling me was just to make me feel better and that they actually hated me.
Adding on to that, most of this had happened about 1 month after my best friend (aka my precious dog) died. She was always the one I went to. She was there for me when I was sad, and I was there when she was super scared and freaked out. This time, I didn't have her with me. I felt alone.

I've been doing a lot better, though. I haven't had a panic attack when ordering food myself, I find myself talking with my friends more, but i'm still very shy and quiet (I've always been like this since 1st grade, so it's been a long process).
Not sure why I've been doing better. It's probably because for the past year I've been revisiting shows and movies I haven't seen since childhood (and obsessing over them all over again), but I don't think that's the case since I was also obsessing over 'children's' shows when I was in a bad mental state.
Probably cause I got back into acting, since voice acting was my dream job as a 4yo, and piano. I completely forgot how much I loved both of these things. Gave me a reason to keep going, and I guess I spun some advice I got into my own life somehow.

 

[EmeraldJourney]

Hey guys! Just wanted to post something in here, not specific to depression or anxiety, but general mental health to make sure y'all are doing okay. I'm constantly struggling with stress and anxiety around being a first-time dad during this pandemic as well as all the other stresses that come from working, raising a baby, and being stuck at home just about all day, every day.

The things I try to do to help alleviate some of the anxiety and stress, or at least to help me deal with it all, are self-reflection and "trimming the fat" so to speak. I used to be able to have a nice, relaxing back-road commute to work for 45 minutes each way, which helped me unwind, grab something sweet and spend time with my own thoughts to help me figure out the day or just generally calm down for the night. I can't do that with being stuck at home, so all I can really do is spend an hour or so with some headphones on focusing on one thing at a time. It's not always easy with a baby on the move, but hey we gotta try something, right?

Anyways, I'm no expert, but right now I'm realizing that there are things that I do that I thought I did out of enjoyment as an escape, but I really am starting to do them out of feeling necessary to do them. These things include...

• Posting daily updates in my Bear Isle and New Leaf threads
• Playing New Horizons every day
• Keeping up with discord and Twitter

It's not easy to step away from some of these things, but some tweaks I've made are...

• Removing the discord app from my home screen on my phone
• Acknowledging that I'm playing and posting every day because I feel that it's necessary, not because I have to, and choosing to not play.

I think subconsciously I play games because I think they help me calm down, but realistically I probably play games because it's what I'm used to doing and it may not be actually helping. I also have this strong urge to fit in and sometimes push myself to join groups or chat with people with similar interests on a regular basis to give myself a feeling of self-worth or just general acceptance from others, but I tend to push myself too hard and it starts to negatively impact me. Relationships of any kind are a lot of work and while I enjoy having friends and talking about my interests, I don't enjoy making people uncomfortable or feeling like I'm forcing myself or others into being liked/liking me. Starts to not feel genuine and I'm really about honesty and integrity. I have a tendency of wearing my heart on my sleeve and I'm not one to hide how I'm feeling.

Some things that Animal Crossing does help with is the social aspects of life. If I play the games to just chat with villagers and hang out, it can be fun and relaxing. I also have a tendency of spending money when I'm stressed/depressed and having the ability to buy things and give gifts in these games without spending real money is really therapeutic in a way. Also sending letters into the void about how I'm feeling is helpful to be able to write and not worry about being judged.

Overall I'd probably say my mental health is at about /10, where some stressors can't be removed from my life but I need to find a way to balance stress and relaxation, but where there is still love and support in my life, and things that bring me happiness every day.

That's my mental health update. How are y'all doing, cha-chomp?

This is such a wholesome idea, and thank you for the mental health check

I'm currently doing absolutely fine and right as rain! How about yourself today? I hope you are having a good one.

For me, games calm me down so, so much and help with the range of emotions I have. For instance, overwatch and plants vs zombies warfare get my frustration out, crossing and stardew help me relax, runescape helps with my collection obsession lol 40,000 coal and level 90 miner.

But I would say also music influences me a lot and can bring me to a better plane in general. A little bit of monsters and men, a little bit of song of storms and a little bit of lana del rey get me through the day. Although Lana is a bit questionable these days..

 

[banjokaboom]

I have to admit, I posted this initially to get a lot off my chest and also to share in what struggles I was having in the hopes of helping some people out, and shortly after this I kind of checked out of some online communities, but I had the urge today to hop back in to them (pretty much just here and DK Vine) and I am touched to see that a decent number of people have shared their struggles. I am grateful and honored that you all are willing to share your struggles or just support the others on here who may be struggling!

Currently I'm doing better mental health-wise, but dealing with ever-changing stresses of being a parent. Currently trying to handle how to talk to a kid who still can't talk but also refuses to listen to you when you say "NO!"

It's fun though! Everyone should do it!



Genuinely hope everyone here is doing well and keeps doing well! You all are amazing!

 

[.: Meri :.]

I don't typically handle change very well, but I recently decided to completely overhaul a major part of my routine. It was something I enjoyed doing at first and it was improving my mood for a good long while, but at some point it had turned into a bit of a stressor and started controlling my schedule, so I decided it was time to let go. It's not been super easy on me, but it's also been a big relief, and I already feel like I have a lot more freedom in my day than I used to. Plus, I'm working to incorporate the part that gave me joy into my routine in other ways, without placing a burden on myself, so I won't feel like I'm losing out on anything.