What's Bothering You?

I bought "The Subtle Art of Not Giving a ****" on a whim because I heard about it long ago and thought it was good. I'm only one chapter in and it's alright, I can definitely relate to a lot of what the author said (stuff about not trying to force positivity all the time and to not care about the very minor things in life), but I saw a lot of reviews that say it just goes downhill after like the third or fourth chapter. There are also parts that are pretty sexist which make me feel uncomfortable. Now I feel bad because I paid $16 for this and I guess I wish I bought a better book instead with $16.

There's this book on depression by a journalist with a really catchy name (don't wanna say it because the title itself might be against the rules). Desperately wish I bought that instead.

Well, whatever. I'll try to find a more interesting self-help book around the house. Maybe my dad has one stashed away somewhere.
 
I preordered a book on March 18th of this year and it was supposed to SHIP in late June of 2022 AT LATEST. Its already July 29th and my mother says she hasnt even gotten a confirmed shipping date or ORDER CONFIRMATION EMAIL YET THEY TOOK THE MONEY OUT OF HER ACCOUNT SO LONG AGO.... It was a book from my favorite YouTuber and I got excited to check the mail and count down the days for MONTHS and it still hasnt arrived... I think I should get a refund. I saved up my money and everything. I still watch her videos every Friday but I wish my book would get here. If it doesnt I will be sad :( Have I been scammed?? I saved up 35 dollars and I am just.. AIUDGAUIDG ANGIE ANGIE ANGRYRYYY :mad: The timeline on the website hasnt even been updated... IM NOT THE ONLY ONE COMPLAINING TOO 😭😭😭 Everyone responding to her original announcement of the book on her Facebook have been just like me complaining about how long its been!!! She HAS to see these but the only things she has said in one of her videos is just that there has been a little delay like... WHAT GIRL???? (By the way it was a Moriah Elizabeth Yearbook)
 
I told my landlord days ago that the shower is broken and he still hasn't sent anyone to fix it. Have mercy on me good sir, we are in the middle of a heatwave and my armpits are in dire need of a shower.
 
I'm starting to realize I struggle with being consistent either in my part-time job or my side work towards becoming a freelancer and I even fear this might probably affect future relationships. Working on social medias to create something be it either digital art, video game commenting, 3D modeling or singing has been a struggle since I need to be consistent for youtube for example to recommend me and since I'm tackling and learning so many different things it takes long to post and for the algorith is not enough.
I like to switch between different subjects as I get bored if I stick to one for long but the internet and even society isn't build for that at least when you are starting. I have been brainstorming plans to be the most consistent I can be but as I was planning I realize it is going to take a while for the plan to come to fruition as I need to draw a few things before I can come back to youtube again and it frustastes me.
This last year I have been more productive that I was before but I'm near my 30s and still struggle to find a proper path in life and be independant. I realize it is no fault of mine as I am still recovering from trauma that keeps lurking in from time to time but then I compare myself to others and people younger than me and feel ashamed of myself. I compare myself to my younger sister who seems like she has more control over her life and I feel like a failure of a big sister. I feel like a failure to my parents and want to prove myself sooner rather than later. The fact that everything I do takes time frustates me and that even includes days when I need to take a breaks from overworking.
 
There was a YouTuber that I used to watch frequently. He does a lot of live streams. I took a bit of a break and stumbled across the channel again. I came back to a livestream, and it just doesn’t seem as genuine, I guess? I used to participate in live streams all the time. Now, when I participate, it just seems a bunch of comments get overlooked. I think I was drawn to the channel for the engagement. Now, I’m just not feeling it.
 
I’ve been getting a lot of messages lately from people on Ebay that didn’t purchase an item but they’ll pretend to be the person who did right after it sells. I’ve really had to watch because they’d ask me to only send one item in the lot, or just pretending to be the person who bought it. It’s weird because I’m not a new seller, and my account was made in 2011 (it was just a buyer account at that time). I’m just confused why there are so many of these accounts that are clearly trying to scam or screw with people. Those new accounts are usually only a day-week old.
 
I'm so fed up of feeling anxious and not sleeping because of this alongside the fact it's still warm, this summer really is giving all it's got and I am so done with it.
 
People asking you for advice and getting mad when you tell them your opinion. Or people who say they are your friend but clearly don’t trust you even though they say they do. They question everything you do… Some people just don’t want to change, I guess, and I was stupid to think they would. My crush is driving me insane. 😣
 
You know what, cliques are okay. But what annoys me are cliques that do a good job of alienating you no matter how much you try to talk to them. Like I get it, I’m not part of your group, but would it kill you to at least acknowledge my (or other’s) efforts in trying to spark a conversation for everyone to join in? I love interacting with people I play with, even if it’s different people every time, but I always feel bad for anyone who feels left out because I know how that’s like. And who knows, anyone not part of the ‘clique’ can be someone’s future good friend!

I don’t know. I hate the concept of alienation a lot. And I hate the feeling that no matter how much I try to talk to the same people, they make me feel like an outsider so much.

I don’t know why I care a lot. I know I shouldn’t, but seeing the same people in the same space as me just triggers my emotions.
 
^ as an autistic person I know the concept and feeling of alienation all too well 🙃


ever since our cat Xander died I've been terrified whenever I see one of our cats (or my dog) sleeping and they aren't responsive when I nudge them. my kitten Miko was sleeping by my feet and when I moved I accidentally bumped her with my foot but she didn't get up or move so my immediate instinct was "oh god is she still alive?" she is okay, thank goodness. but the fact that Xander passed so quickly and unexpectedly, and that I was the one who found him like that, has just really messed me up.

it's also made my anxiety so much worse. every day I think to myself "I could literally just die at any moment without explanation". I worry about losing my animals and my mom every single day. it's a never ending torture.

it's honestly really made me question my mere existence, and made me realize that there's a whole future out there that I'll never get to experience. my time here is so limited. I also feel like my persistent depression is making me waste that limited time.

idk everything is so difficult to comprehend. all I can really do is distract myself from it.
 
skarmoury said:
You know what, cliques are okay. But what annoys me are cliques that do a good job of alienating you no matter how much you try to talk to them. Like I get it, I’m not part of your group, but would it kill you to at least acknowledge my (or other’s) efforts in trying to spark a conversation for everyone to join in? I love interacting with people I play with, even if it’s different people every time, but I always feel bad for anyone who feels left out because I know how that’s like. And who knows, anyone not part of the ‘clique’ can be someone’s future good friend!

I don’t know. I hate the concept of alienation a lot. And I hate the feeling that no matter how much I try to talk to the same people, they make me feel like an outsider so much.

I don’t know why I care a lot. I know I shouldn’t, but seeing the same people in the same space as me just triggers my emotions.
Click to expand...
You care because you have a good heart. Be proud of that...they're hard to find these days.
 
I fell down the stairs (kind of). I was running and missed a step, more like. Thankfully it was only on the last three steps and I only hurt my foot, even though I landed pretty hard on my side. I gotta be more careful, though. :(
 
It's too hot to go to Vancouver Pride tomorrow which sucks cause all my friends are going. Plus I haven't gone to the parade since before covid in 2019 but the heat makes me break out in rashes and I get a lil cranky so it's best just to stay home this year.
 
been sleeping most of the day. I just don't have the energy to do anything. I feel like I have the flu without actually having the physical symptoms. there was a lgbt+ potluck today at 3pm and I didn't get to go bc I've been sleeping so much today.

lately my off days aren't just off days where I feel a little down and need to relax. they feel like my depression is coming back full throttle and has run me over with a truck. at this point I'm just trying to survive, doing the bare minimum.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.

Similar threads

Bulbadragon
What websites have you used the longest?
2
Replies
25
Views
1K
Rosch
Rosch
Rilesnation
  • Poll Poll
What's your go-to snack while playing Animal Crossing?
Replies
11
Views
849
-Blue-
-Blue-
Croxxingfan98
  • Poll Poll
Animal Crossing Manga Translation?
Replies
2
Views
983
Croxxingfan98
Croxxingfan98
M
What's your saddest turnip tale?
Replies
3
Views
334
Savont 2.0
Savont 2.0
GooseyGuos
What job do you have?
Replies
15
Views
1K
Beanz
Beanz
Back
Top