What's Bothering You?
- Thread starter Oblivia
- Start date
VanitasFan26
I'm just a ghost.
I can relate to how you're feeling. As someone who as to put up with "toxic friends" I know what it feels like to be backstabbed or betrayed by someone you thought was supposed to be your friend, but then they do awful stuff to you. I learned that the only person that can change is yourself and not them. My therapist told me that you're better off without them. Expecting them to change is only going to make the situation a lot harder on yourself.
I know from experience and let me just say when you cut off toxic people out of your life, you feel much better about yourself. If you still feel down about it, you can DM me anytime you wanna talk more about it. Trust me I know what it feels like to go through a bad experience like this.
i need to email my band director about joining color guard but im super nervous ahhh. i got so many people telling me i'll regret it if i dont join this year especially bcs its my senior year but omg im so scared of my parents 
everytime i bring up joining they get mad or tell me im not gonna take it seriously so why waste my time. i need their permission to do it to make me feel at ease about doing it, i dont wanna do it if i dont have their support.. its just gonna make me feel.. icky. i dont know how to convince them to let me do it, ive tried telling them so many times i'll take it seriously, ive tried telling them i really want to do this but they wont believe me. it sucks bc no matter how many times i try theyre never gonna believe me or support me in what i want to do :/
everytime i bring up joining they get mad or tell me im not gonna take it seriously so why waste my time. i need their permission to do it to make me feel at ease about doing it, i dont wanna do it if i dont have their support.. its just gonna make me feel.. icky. i dont know how to convince them to let me do it, ive tried telling them so many times i'll take it seriously, ive tried telling them i really want to do this but they wont believe me. it sucks bc no matter how many times i try theyre never gonna believe me or support me in what i want to do :/Hi, I’ve been looking through your posts and I’m incredibly sorry that your parents aren’t supportive in what you want to do. I’ve had similar experiences in which my secondary family (not my parents, but my grandma and uncles) would put negative stuff in my mind whenever they heard about my plans to move out of state. I know in your case, it’s kind of different, because you would need permission due to it being for something in high school. I know how big of an impact these negative thoughts can have. If they’re spewing negativity and telling you you can’t do something, eventually you will believe it… no matter how hard you try not to. I definitely know the impact it can have because there’s always that voice… their voice… in the back of mind saying “you can’t do it” or “oh you’ll be back.” It really hurts because the things they’re saying, they likely don’t know the long term affects these negative thoughts can have. You don’t have to persuade them as much as you want to, because trust me, you don’t owe anyone is explanation. And no, you don’t owe your parents an explanation. Who cares if they are your parents? Would parents be constantly spewing negativity and trying to control you? No. You don’t have to explain yourself to anyone.i need to email my band director about joining color guard but im super nervous ahhh. i got so many people telling me i'll regret it if i dont join this year especially bcs its my senior year but omg im so scared of my parents
I’m really sorry that you’re going through this. My advice would be to persuade your parents just enough to get them to let you do it. After that, immediately get those negative thoughts out of your mind, and replace those negative thoughts with positive thoughts. Telling yourself you can do it has the same impact as someone telling you that you can’t. Say that to yourself, that you can do it. Ridding yourself of those negative thoughts that your parents put in your head is crucial before you start. You don’t need to be zoning out during the colorguard training because those doubts are crowding your mind. Cleanse yourself completely and fill yourself with positivity.
thank you so much for taking the time to respond to this!! it means a lot. and of course, if i do end up being able to do it im not gonna let their negative thoughts clog up my mind. ive been wanting to do this for so long and just being able to be in the same environment with the color guard is enough to make me forget all the things they've told meHi, I’ve been looking through your posts and I’m incredibly sorry that your parents aren’t supportive in what you want to do. I’ve had similar experiences in which my secondary family (not my parents, but my grandma and uncles) would put negative stuff in my mind whenever they heard about my plans to move out of state. I know in your case, it’s kind of different, because you would need permission due to it being for something in high school. I know how big of an impact these negative thoughts can have. If they’re spewing negativity and telling you you can’t do something, eventually you will believe it… no matter how hard you try not to. I definitely know the impact it can have because there’s always that voice… their voice… in the back of mind saying “you can’t do it” or “oh you’ll be back.” It really hurts because the things they’re saying, they likely don’t know the long term affects these negative thoughts can have. You don’t have to persuade them as much as you want to, because trust me, you don’t owe anyone is explanation. And no, you don’t owe your parents an explanation. Who cares if they are your parents? Would parents be constantly spewing negativity and trying to control you? No. You don’t have to explain yourself to anyone.
I’m really sorry that you’re going through this. My advice would be to persuade your parents just enough to get them to let you do it. After that, immediately get those negative thoughts out of your mind, and replace those negative thoughts with positive thoughts. Telling yourself you can do it has the same impact as someone telling you that you can’t. Say that to yourself, that you can do it. Ridding yourself of those negative thoughts that your parents put in your head is crucial before you start. You don’t need to be zoning out during the colorguard training because those doubts are crowding your mind. Cleanse yourself completely and fill yourself with positivity.
i will definitely try talking it out with my parents before it is too late, i technically am already going to be joining late, so i really dont want to be any later than i already am 
Dunquixote
No dms and discord messages
I’m happy with my print (trying to go through five hours of video footage on the first va’s stream to find my print being signed right now) but am still pissed at streamily. i checked when i sent my edit request and i sent it before any of the signings happened. i would maybe understand no response if i sent it right after the streams started but i didn’t; the second and third messages yeah but i was asking why they didn’t see my first message? Or check before sending it to the voice actor. Rather than leave me hanging, just tell me if my request is or isn’t okay. 
Half of me regrets taking this gap year. On one hand I didn’t have to deal with the nightmare that is online school. On the other hand the lack of a routine is aggravating. Every day I anticipate starting college. Things like video games and books are great, but they’re harder to do with unlimited free time. I just end up feeling depressed and bored. At least I only have a few weeks left.
xSuperMario64x
love of my life 💙💜
^^ I honestly am still very much enjoying taking a year off but yeah having no routine kinda sucks (and I can't set my own routines cause I won't follow them lol). kinda wish I had a part time job but idk where I would work (I can't handle fast food and retail, basically places where everything is fast-paced) and I'm terrified to get a job on account of autism/anxiety.
I lowkey hate seeing ppl do amazing things like draw and animate (things I love) and I can't do them bc paralyzing depression and exec dysfunction exist. i cant tell if i feel depressed again because the camp event ended and i now have nothing to do and look forward to, or because of my meds. im guessing the former since it kinda started right after the event ended.
I lowkey hate seeing ppl do amazing things like draw and animate (things I love) and I can't do them bc paralyzing depression and exec dysfunction exist. i cant tell if i feel depressed again because the camp event ended and i now have nothing to do and look forward to, or because of my meds. im guessing the former since it kinda started right after the event ended.
Dunquixote
No dms and discord messages
Streamily support still hasn’t replied and idk what to do to complain since their website says contact their support if i have questions about order or problems or need changes. I am posting on a social media too about this too and asking for an explanation about why they didn’t reply or do the changes I asked for. Nothing so far.
xSuperMario64x
love of my life 💙💜
I really want a disco ball egg 
Shellzilla_515
Senior Member
Hey, Diluc, I've been noticing for quite a while that you have been applying to numerous jobs in hopes to land one. It's really tough to hear the news of being turned down for the position, especially if you worked really hard for it in the interview phase and needing to find income asap.
Not gonna lie, ever since the pandemic started, it threw off my plans in getting a job and it's only just recently I've started to apply for one. If it never happened in the first place, most of the stuff I learned in college would still be fresh in my mind and be good to enter the industry I'm going into. Despite gaining the knowledge, I haven't applied a lot of them and have become rusty since (I could take a look at my notes, but a lot of stuff is hands-on). Moreover, aside from the externship I had to do, it's my first time applying for an actual job and I'm a little nervous, to be honest with you. However, I'm trying anyway because my parents expect me to get a job and that I can't expect things to come to me by doing nothing. Life can be very difficult in many ways, but if we keep trying and step out of our comfort zone to become better selves, an opportunity will open up. If you keep trying and not giving up, Diluc, you might find a job that could be better than what you had imagined.
What, that's just... Why? Who in their right mind would think that they should just withdraw students from school? They've literally just impeded you from progressing to graduate from high school and it's gonna be a huge headache to get back in, all because of poor communication. Sorry to hear that.
I'm not sure if you have done any animations, but I definitely did see your drawings and they're quite good in my eyes! I don't even know how people are able to draw smooth lines in Flipnote. Though, I do understand why you'd feel this way, on top of not having as much free time to do art. I hope you'd find the drive again to go back to do some art and animation to kick negative thoughts out of your mind. I really hope my reply doesn't come off as invalidating your feelings. I just want you to be happy again soon.
As for myself, I love to do some animation as well and dreaming to get into the animation industry, but I still have ways to go, on top of my art skills that aren't just there yet even though I'm making some progress. Also, life exists and I may have less time to hone my skills for drawing and animating.
Reginald Fairfield
Senior Member
You'd think they'd inform you.
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Hi! I was in a very similar position… I really hated where I grew up and that was an understatement. I’ve been wanting to get out to a different city, because where I grew up had memories I wanted to forget, and the scenery just sucked. I didn’t really have a valid reason other than I didn’t feel like it was my home, but that’s all the reason you need.
I’ve saved up to move out (not the unreasonable 10k that people say you need, but half that) because everyone is different… but the problem was, after going to the new city, I found jobs very quickly, like in less than a week. But I applied for zero apartments. I had an irrational fear I wouldn’t get approved, so I just didn’t try. Because I’ve had people tell me that it was unrealistic or I’d be back someday. Even though I knew I wanted to leave, it hurt and left doubts in my mind.
I’ve only recently got out of that negative mindset and plan to find that motivation I never had to actually try. Because my failing every single time I believed was due to lack of effort. Because no matter how much money you have, it’ll eventually run out if you’re not doing anything to move forward.
First of all, there’s always a way. There are ways to find jobs out of state if you’re ready for a change of scenery. If you’re interested in at least hearing about it, you can reach out to me. I’ve done it before, so it definitely works, and there are decent paying jobs too. I’m looking to permanently leave the state of PA for absolute good before the end of this year. The difference is that I want to find confidence this time that I never had before. I’ve had more jobs than I’d like to admit to though, and it’s because I kept trying to leave, because I wasn’t happy in my birth state, so I definitely wasn’t happy at my job. I’m a lot happier in different locations, I’ve found out. Good luck getting out. I know it’s hard, but you can do it.
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Dawnpiplup
Kick ass.
College life. I don't think I'm really set out for this college thing. Also... ****ing low ass self esteem. And I guess I'm just having a meh day. :/
Thanks, friend, but I think it'll still be awhile before I find a job where I can actually put my university degree to good use. It doesn't help that I can't drive, and I can't drive because of my Aspergers/ASD. It's too dangerous for me, and I'd probably be dead by now had I chosen to get my license when I was 16. Still, thank you for your words.
Thank you for your words, but I'm actually not looking to move to another state or country right now. I don't have the money to even move in the first place, nor can I drive, so I'm just looking to find something better near where I am.
Thanks guys for your words again. I really do appreciate it. I'd prefer that no one else replies to my recent posts here from here on out though. Thank you.
nyx~
~killutora~
Ever since school started back my feeling of loneliness has come back like a slap in the face. I talk to my online friends, who I'm truly grateful for, but just seeing everyone in their friend groups and hearing people talk about their best friends just hits me sometimes. Like I have friends but they don't invite me to do stuff out of school and half the time I feel like I'm just there and people forget my existence.
Insane amounts of interest for a damn loan that I got for medical reasons when my mom had the same EXACT work done and her interest is 0% literal bull and it’s not like I can just stop paying it cause my dad co-signed for me and I’m not screwing him over but yeah I have college level debt now for medical reasons and I hate Pennsylvania. Literally nothing against that state but it’s boring in the city I was born in, I see the same things every single day and I’m ready for a damn change, and I have memories here I’m trying to forget … I’m fine with the monthly payments but the fact that I would’ve literally paid DOUBLE what the actual procedure costs is **** UGH
