The out of context quotes thread

[Captain Jigglypuff]

“*Giggling* Papa-san looks like sushi roll!”

 

[QueenCobra]

“You ruined the sanctity of the teachers’ lounge!”
“If you don’t read my ‘Zombie Blood Chronicles’, you’re not my mother!”

 

[Captain Jigglypuff]

“I’m good for welding but driving’s out of the question.”

 

[QueenCobra]

“Peter, we gave your room to Jesus.”

“Jesus doesn’t need a room!”

 

[Captain Jigglypuff]

“Yep. This episode is about horse eating disorders!”

 

[Captain Jigglypuff]

“And what’s that round thing?”
“That- that’s a globe. Do you really not know what it is?”
“No.”

 

[Captain Jigglypuff]

“I made you a virgin daiquiri! Hee hee hee! I said virgin!”
“[Girl] gotta go!”

 

[Captain Jigglypuff]

“Let us out and we’ll burn the house down!”
“Shouldn’t that be or?”
“Let us out or we’ll burn the house down.”

 

[BakaRina]

"My life isn’t as glamorous as my wanted poster makes it look like."

 

[-Blue-]

"My life isn’t as glamorous as my wanted poster makes it look like."

I'm not sure what that's from, but it reminds me of this

 

[Captain Jigglypuff]

“Wow, Bender. Are you and the ship an item? I mean I know you're both items but-- How can you date a ship anyway? It'd be like me dating a really fat lady. And living inside her.”

 

[-Blue-]

“Wow, Bender. Are you and the ship an item? I mean I know you're both items but-- How can you date a ship anyway? It'd be like me dating a really fat lady. And living inside her.”

And look who's scraping up the filth. Is it a human child? I wish!

 

[Captain Jigglypuff]

“Remember, crime doesn’t pay!”
“How much does being a superhero pay?”
*Superhero looks at kid in silence of reflection for a few seconds before flying through bank wall and then flying off with bags of money*

 

[Captain Jigglypuff]

I won’t be having what she’s having.

 

[Captain Jigglypuff]

“Me fail English? That’s unpossible!”

 

[QueenCobra]

“Have you ever had to mace your landlord?”