The out of context quotes thread

“This lemonade tastes awful!”
“It’s organic!”
“We used lemons that died a natural death.”
“We waited until they reached the first stage of decomposition.”
 
“No no words?”
“Yeah. There’s magic, feather, wing, oh and mayonnaise!”
“What’s wrong with mayo”
*Izzy shushes Hitch by covering his mouth with her hoof*
 
"There is no such thing as a free lunch. And if someone gives you a car, they will call you everyday for the rest of your life."
 
“Hey Mama! Our lottery numbers came in. We just won $50,000!”
“Everyone in the room cheers*
“Praise the lord! Where’s that lottery ticket?”
*Fake rat has ripped up ticket in its mouth*
“Oh no! Mr Stinky ate the lottery tickets! Oh please don’t be mad at him! He’s my only friend.”
*Mr Stinky lets out a dying squeak and falls over. Everyone is staring at the dead rat in shock*
“Oh no!”
“Would this be a bad time to tell y’all I got sickle cell?”
 
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