Aronthaer
Back from Hiatus (3/18/22)
I felt I had to post about this. it was so crazy, I need to share it with someone.
I've had strong feelings towards a certain girl, a childhood friend of mine, for a few years now. the other night, she called me at 2:30 AM. I had a feeling something was going on, so I ran outside, forgetting to even put on shoes or a coat before I left. snow is coming down hard and I'm freezing. I was talking to her on the phone and she was having a complete meltdown. This wasn't the first time I had seen her like this, but it was the first time I wasn't able to hug her and comfort her. I tried to calm her down, and she starts talking about how much I meant to her. and then I told her what she meant to me.
She responded with a surprising brutality. about how we could never be together, how she could never love me... How she would die for me as a brother, but that my feelings were ridiculous and that I should know better... I hung up so she wouldn't hear me crying. I sat on the pavement, covered in snow at this point, to see that my cousin had brought me a coat and shoes. he said he had heard the ringtone go off and saw me leaving, and that I didn't have to explain myself. he only asked that I don't freeze to death, which I admittedly almost did. I caught a bad cold after this incident.
So after being crushed like this, a few days later, I'm looking at my online english course. It's a small class, and while the girl had dropped out last year, her sister still does work with me. I look at the assignment for Friday and I see this;
"Next week we will be reading The Great Gatsby. Split into groups of two as assigned by the syllabus and discuss unreciprocated love. debate if this one-way love is actually love and post your findings together. This assignment is meant to invoke deep discussion, so feel free to draw on past experiences."
I look at my partner for the assignment, and, you guessed it, it's her sister. Days after being rejected, my school is going to make me talk about it with her sister. to make it even better, her sister was actually my childhood crush. my entire life is a poorly written anime at this point. I don't even know what to think about all of this.
I've had strong feelings towards a certain girl, a childhood friend of mine, for a few years now. the other night, she called me at 2:30 AM. I had a feeling something was going on, so I ran outside, forgetting to even put on shoes or a coat before I left. snow is coming down hard and I'm freezing. I was talking to her on the phone and she was having a complete meltdown. This wasn't the first time I had seen her like this, but it was the first time I wasn't able to hug her and comfort her. I tried to calm her down, and she starts talking about how much I meant to her. and then I told her what she meant to me.
She responded with a surprising brutality. about how we could never be together, how she could never love me... How she would die for me as a brother, but that my feelings were ridiculous and that I should know better... I hung up so she wouldn't hear me crying. I sat on the pavement, covered in snow at this point, to see that my cousin had brought me a coat and shoes. he said he had heard the ringtone go off and saw me leaving, and that I didn't have to explain myself. he only asked that I don't freeze to death, which I admittedly almost did. I caught a bad cold after this incident.
So after being crushed like this, a few days later, I'm looking at my online english course. It's a small class, and while the girl had dropped out last year, her sister still does work with me. I look at the assignment for Friday and I see this;
"Next week we will be reading The Great Gatsby. Split into groups of two as assigned by the syllabus and discuss unreciprocated love. debate if this one-way love is actually love and post your findings together. This assignment is meant to invoke deep discussion, so feel free to draw on past experiences."
I look at my partner for the assignment, and, you guessed it, it's her sister. Days after being rejected, my school is going to make me talk about it with her sister. to make it even better, her sister was actually my childhood crush. my entire life is a poorly written anime at this point. I don't even know what to think about all of this.
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