What's Bothering You?

Had an allergic reaction to some meds and now I'm itchy af. Trying to drink as much water as possible to flush the meds from my system and stop being itchy.:(
Oh no I hope it clears up fast! I used to get poison ivy (and all the others) so badly all the time. It was the worst. I hope you feel better soon! Could you maybe use some rash cream to lessen it?
 
experienced a shock arrest at a palestine protest over the weekend and got out of custody yesterday after 23 long hours (technically 25 hours, but 23 in a cell). thought it wouldnt be a big deal like all my other arrests and then i broke down crying at work today from the stress of it all. now its 1 am and im emailing my lawyers trying to organise representation. i love what i do and id never change it for the world but this legal system.... it gets me down!
so even though the arrest experience was driving me insane i still worked everyday this week until today and i kept just like.... crying at work? and losing my mind? which was strange. whatever. it's a sign from my body and for a short while i'm going to heed the warning. i'm off work for 9 days straight now, but four of those days will be spent in my hometown visiting my (almost) estranged family so i know it's still going to be emotionally taxxing. ah !
 
If I didn't have so many connections on Discord I would've deleted my account weeks ago. Discord has traumatized me in so many ways and it feels like a toxic relationship. I've wasted entire days just mindlessly chatting with people on Discord instead of enjoying my hobbies.

I've put too much trust into dozens of people I privately messaged on that app and have been hurt by nearly all of them. I've been projected on, verbally attacked, manipulated, abruptly discarded, and had my feelings or opinions dismissed endlessly for many years. I've joined random public servers out of sheer boredom and exposed myself to harmful trolls. I wasted my entire young adulthood on Discord because I didn't trust people irl and wanted social connection from somewhere.

I am just a username on a screen with a cute profile picture to nearly everyone I know online. That is it. They can say they "enjoy talking to me" or that they'd "never cut contact" but I know that's not true. All they need to do when they're bored or mildly annoyed with me is unfriend, ghost, or block and they never have to hear from me again. It doesn't matter how often they interacted with me or how much we opened up to each other. There are no social repercussions to ghosting or cutting off people you only know online. I am one of millions of people on Discord they could engage with and if I'm not good enough, which I am not to most, than they can just find another person to interact with.

Whenever I talk to someone new online privately I usually don't put in much effort anymore. I know my texting style is verbose and off putting (especially since I have a habit of talking about myself too much) so I don't usually text unless I am reached out to first. I am mad at myself for wasting seven years of my life getting hurt repeatedly instead of going to events and meeting people who'd treat me like an actual person.

Every time I think about Discord my anger comes back. The dozen or so people I still regularly text on there are amazing and they're the only thing that keep me from deleting that account. I wish I could end my Discord years entirely, but there are no popular alternative apps for gamers and I don't want to lose all of my friends. For now I've decided to remove the app on my phone and just use Discord on my PC. Cutting my time on there a bit helps considerably. I just wish it didn't have to come to that.
 
As a chess fan I'm so horrifically sad about the death of Daniel Nairoditsky. A 29 year old grandmaster and content creator.

I found a lot of comfort in his videos over the years. I loved studying through him and he became my favorite player.

The world feels more empty tonight.

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I honestly don’t even know how to process what just happened. My dad has diabetes and dementia, and tonight things went horribly wrong. His blood sugar was really high earlier — around 316 — so I gave him 45 units of Humalog to help bring it down. I didn’t realize that he had already eaten earlier and probably took insulin too, but he didn’t remember because of his dementia.

A few hours later he started acting really weird — twitching, getting up and down, not responding when I tried to talk to him. I begged him to eat something sweet but he wouldn’t listen. My mom and I had no choice but to call 911. When the paramedics came, his blood sugar was 63. They rushed him to the hospital, and I just found out it’s back up to 117 now, thank God.

I’m just completely broken right now. I feel like I failed him even though I was only trying to help. And what makes me even angrier is that his primary doctor hasn’t been doing her job — she keeps referring him to specialists for his dementia, but his insurance doesn’t even cover them. We’ve been left to manage everything on our own, and this is what it’s led to.

I’m home now taking care of my mom while my dad’s at the hospital, and I just can’t stop replaying it in my head — him not responding, me panicking, calling 911. It feels like a nightmare.

I know I did what I had to do, but I can’t stop feeling sick over it.
 
I honestly don’t even know how to process what just happened. My dad has diabetes and dementia, and tonight things went horribly wrong. His blood sugar was really high earlier — around 316 — so I gave him 45 units of Humalog to help bring it down. I didn’t realize that he had already eaten earlier and probably took insulin too, but he didn’t remember because of his dementia.

A few hours later he started acting really weird — twitching, getting up and down, not responding when I tried to talk to him. I begged him to eat something sweet but he wouldn’t listen. My mom and I had no choice but to call 911. When the paramedics came, his blood sugar was 63. They rushed him to the hospital, and I just found out it’s back up to 117 now, thank God.

I’m just completely broken right now. I feel like I failed him even though I was only trying to help. And what makes me even angrier is that his primary doctor hasn’t been doing her job — she keeps referring him to specialists for his dementia, but his insurance doesn’t even cover them. We’ve been left to manage everything on our own, and this is what it’s led to.

I’m home now taking care of my mom while my dad’s at the hospital, and I just can’t stop replaying it in my head — him not responding, me panicking, calling 911. It feels like a nightmare.

I know I did what I had to do, but I can’t stop feeling sick over it.
Don't beat yourself up over it. Process it then accept it the best way you can. You did what you could
 
I honestly don’t even know how to process what just happened. My dad has diabetes and dementia, and tonight things went horribly wrong. His blood sugar was really high earlier — around 316 — so I gave him 45 units of Humalog to help bring it down. I didn’t realize that he had already eaten earlier and probably took insulin too, but he didn’t remember because of his dementia.

A few hours later he started acting really weird — twitching, getting up and down, not responding when I tried to talk to him. I begged him to eat something sweet but he wouldn’t listen. My mom and I had no choice but to call 911. When the paramedics came, his blood sugar was 63. They rushed him to the hospital, and I just found out it’s back up to 117 now, thank God.

I’m just completely broken right now. I feel like I failed him even though I was only trying to help. And what makes me even angrier is that his primary doctor hasn’t been doing her job — she keeps referring him to specialists for his dementia, but his insurance doesn’t even cover them. We’ve been left to manage everything on our own, and this is what it’s led to.

I’m home now taking care of my mom while my dad’s at the hospital, and I just can’t stop replaying it in my head — him not responding, me panicking, calling 911. It feels like a nightmare.

I know I did what I had to do, but I can’t stop feeling sick over it.
Maybe start writing down doses and time taken?
 
Having a sinus headache...

But this has been happening alot. I'm on mobile
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Also site being so slow to load
 

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One of my cats fur on her belly stilly hasn’t grown back yet and today, it looks like it is getting sore since it looks a bit pinker now. My mom will take a look at her belly tomorrow. When we last had her at the vet, even though all her fur had been licked off, all the vet said was to keep an eye on it. It hasn’t gotten worse until maybe now, but her fur hasn’t grown back either.

Been feeling irritable for a couple days for no reason (probably time of month) and now a bit stressed for no reason (aside from just being around my dad and him always shooting me looks like I’m stupid whenever I talk; that’s not the worse thing he did over the years, but nothing I can do or my mom). My mom has started wearing noise blocking headphones to avoid listening to my dad; it has been frustrating me to talk to her and get her attention now because she is wearing those, even when he isn’t in the room or home. I don’t blame her for doing that, but same time, now it makes it hard for me to get her attention without getting irritated (at least this week).

No comments or replies please.
 
Im so upset like im going to this music festival next month and i got an email that my wristband arrived and it got signed off. My mom didn’t sign it off and im not able to get a replacement unless my brother goes to pick it up the day of which makes me feel so bad since he’ll be having to drive to the city multiple times just so im able to go. I checked with one of my neighbors with the same address but he didn’t have it and my other neighbor’s asleep so im really hoping he has it but just thinking about it not being with him is stressing me out so bad. my wristband was $420 and it was my birthday present to myself so im just really disappointed
 
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