xSuperMario64x
love of my life 💙💜
that's some seriously ableist bull**** and you don't deserve that kind of treatment at all. that's ridiculous.
What's Bothering You?
- Thread starter Oblivia
- Start date
Getting real sick of my job. They let all the other workers constantly get away with goofing off and calling out everyday while they have me do everything and work myself to the bone. Maybe I’d be okay with it if it was worth the pay… but it isn’t. I requested some time off to take it easy and rest my tired body but I doubt they’ll let me have it. -____-
god I’m really sorry about that xara.( I’ve been in a very similar position with my own mother and I know how hurtful it feels to be told to stop thinking about it. hugs.
thank you both so much, and to everyone else who interacted with my post in any way as well. i honestly don’t even know what to say other than thank you, and that i’m so sorry you’ve been in similar situations with your own family. you guys made me feel valid and seen, and i really can’t thank ya’ll enough. i always feel so crazy and invalid and alone whenever stuff like this happens, and it’s nice to know that i’m actually not. :’) thank you.
also, i’ve never understood why reflection papers get marked tbh. like, you can’t really give a grade or a rating to something that’s personal lol. sorry you got a 7/10, skar.
and zelda, i’m sorry your stepmom got mad at you and that you’re having a bad day. it’s not your fault that you forget things — you can’t control something like that. you deserve compassion and understanding, and i’m sorry that your stepmom isn’t giving you that. i hope your day improves.
“it’s not about bringing up their past it’s about you trying to heal from yours” man, this got me lol. i’m literally just trying to heal. i’ve been hurting on my own for so long now all because i haven’t been given the space to talk about how certain things have affected me. i’m not trying to pin my mom as a bad parent/person or ask her to fix me or take back everything she’s done/said because she obviously can’t, i just want her to hear me. i just want an apology, for her to tell me that my feelings are valid. deep down i know that they are, but her always immediately shutting me down really makes me doubt lol. ‘her’ past still affects my present. i won’t be able to move on until she lets me talk about it, and she won’t let me. she tells her facebook friends not to bottle up their feelings, but it’s always “i’m sorry i’m such a horrible mother”, “don’t bring up the past” or “i’ll just leave then and make everyone happy” with me. idk, it sucks lol.
but thank you so much for taking the time to respond and validate me, it really means a lot. and i’m so sorry you went through the same thing with your dad. you didn’t deserve that.
It’s not easy to heal and doing so by yourself is harder. I do hope you know your feeling are valid . Sometimes you just need to hear it from one person and it hurts when they won’t tell you.
“i’ll just leave then and make everyone happy”my father used to say this line a lot. Trying to make me feel guilty like everything was my fault . He did eventually leave one night (came back a year later) when I finally found out the reason for his behavior it made me feels worse and still trying to heal from
It all.
Your welcome , I hope you and your mom can mend your relationship and she lets you explain how you are feeling. Give yourself time to heal .
ZeldaCrossing64
Sugary Cynic
My brother has pissed me off so many times today. God, I just wanna smack him in the face right now.
xSuperMario64x
love of my life 💙💜
finished my 47 min long recording just to find out that my recording software was messing up and it deleted like the last 14 min of footage :/
edit: more issues. I've been wondering for the last month or so if my anti-depressant stopped working. sometime in May I started feeling depressed again, but I thought I was just having a brief episode (which I'd had since I started taking this dose) and that it would pass. it never did pass and here I am, two months later, right back to where I started. I'm not interested in doing most things anymore, and when I try to do something that I would normally think is fun it just really doesn't click with me. I haven't drawn anything in almost a month and despite having so many ideas I can't seem to work on any of them. I don't want to go outside anymore and take care of the yard or plants, I just want to hide in my room and sleep all day. I dont want to wear normal clothes anymore, i just want to wear pajamas and hide in blankets all day. I feel awful.
the soonest appt my doctor has is Thursday but I may call tomorrow and see if I can go in sooner. I really need to figure out what's up and whether or not I need to try another need medication (which I hate to do bc I've already tried like 4 different ones with no success, and this one was briefly successful but has stopped). I'm just tired of feeling this way, I want the normal me back again.
it kinda sucks bc I have 33 minutes of recorded footage from SimCity and im highkey not really happy w it, some of my commentary is way offbeat and when I heard it come out of my mouth I would say "why would you say something like that" to myself. idk I'll go back and edit it tomorrow and see if it's upload worthy. if I can even find the energy to do it.
edit: more issues. I've been wondering for the last month or so if my anti-depressant stopped working. sometime in May I started feeling depressed again, but I thought I was just having a brief episode (which I'd had since I started taking this dose) and that it would pass. it never did pass and here I am, two months later, right back to where I started. I'm not interested in doing most things anymore, and when I try to do something that I would normally think is fun it just really doesn't click with me. I haven't drawn anything in almost a month and despite having so many ideas I can't seem to work on any of them. I don't want to go outside anymore and take care of the yard or plants, I just want to hide in my room and sleep all day. I dont want to wear normal clothes anymore, i just want to wear pajamas and hide in blankets all day. I feel awful.
the soonest appt my doctor has is Thursday but I may call tomorrow and see if I can go in sooner. I really need to figure out what's up and whether or not I need to try another need medication (which I hate to do bc I've already tried like 4 different ones with no success, and this one was briefly successful but has stopped). I'm just tired of feeling this way, I want the normal me back again.
it kinda sucks bc I have 33 minutes of recorded footage from SimCity and im highkey not really happy w it, some of my commentary is way offbeat and when I heard it come out of my mouth I would say "why would you say something like that" to myself. idk I'll go back and edit it tomorrow and see if it's upload worthy. if I can even find the energy to do it.
Last edited:
tessa grace
yeehaw
im such a lurker these days. i rarely come on and post anymore, and i miss the conversations and fun i had with everyone here.
thank you so much again. i do know my feelings are valid, it just really doesn’t feel that way sometimes haha. i’m so sorry you had to hear that from your dad as well, and deal with him actually leaving. i’d be so angry if my mom did that to me. you didn’t deserve that. but it wasn’t your fault at all, and i hope you heal from it one day. thank you again.
Your welcome and thanks. Yea I get how you feel . I was angry and hurt when he left. With time it will heal. Your welcome and thank you.thank you so much again. i do know my feelings are valid, it just really doesn’t feel that way sometimes haha. i’m so sorry you had to hear that from your dad as well, and deal with him actually leaving. i’d be so angry if my mom did that to me. you didn’t deserve that. but it wasn’t your fault at all, and i hope you heal from it one day. thank you again.
Violet Witch
☽Stay Wild Moon Child☾
My anxiety has hit levels I've never felt before and it's been both horrible and draining all at once. I'm going to bed earlier as I'm so tired but also I'm waking up ridiculously early because the moment I open my eyes my anxiety goes through the roof.
xSuperMario64x
love of my life 💙💜
called the doctors office to see if I could get in sooner just to remember that today is Saturday and the office is closed, so I basically have to deal w this for 2 more days at least :,,,,,,)
can't wait to deal with all the people who think that "depression is just a stare of mind" and "you'll feel better if you think positively" as if it isn't literally a mental illness, that's like saying positivity can make influenza and bronchitis go away lol.
can't wait to deal with all the people who think that "depression is just a stare of mind" and "you'll feel better if you think positively" as if it isn't literally a mental illness, that's like saying positivity can make influenza and bronchitis go away lol.
ZeldaCrossing64
Sugary Cynic
Honestly, a lot of things is bothering me. Last night I had so much stuff on my mind, I spent half an hour pacing around my room and talking to myself. I felt crazy and stupid for doing so . . . And paranoid, I thought someone was listening to my monologue.
I talked about a lot of stuff, but the main point was about my art-style. I don't think it would be considered bad, but I don't think it's really good either. I just wish I could do more. I get mad at myself for only drawing Beef Boss and Abby all the fricking time, but when I try drawing something new, it looks wonky and I get discouraged. I see fan-art online and I think: "Wow, that's really good, I wish I could draw like that..." But I know that my art-style won't change if I don't improve.
On a less serious note, I found this thing on Reddit of Poof and Beef Boss singing a Friday Night Funkin' song (Ugh) and I can't stop listening to it?? And I thought I was done with FNF, but I guess not.
This might contradict what I just said, but it's too bad there's no option to loop the song either, because it's only a minute-and-a-half long so I have to keep replaying the video manually to listen to it again.
I talked about a lot of stuff, but the main point was about my art-style. I don't think it would be considered bad, but I don't think it's really good either. I just wish I could do more. I get mad at myself for only drawing Beef Boss and Abby all the fricking time, but when I try drawing something new, it looks wonky and I get discouraged. I see fan-art online and I think: "Wow, that's really good, I wish I could draw like that..." But I know that my art-style won't change if I don't improve.
On a less serious note, I found this thing on Reddit of Poof and Beef Boss singing a Friday Night Funkin' song (Ugh) and I can't stop listening to it?? And I thought I was done with FNF, but I guess not.
This might contradict what I just said, but it's too bad there's no option to loop the song either, because it's only a minute-and-a-half long so I have to keep replaying the video manually to listen to it again.
DarkDesertFox
Your Typical Trickster
Tested negative for COVID-19 and while I should feel relieved, I'm really not because now I'm not sure what's causing my excessive fatigue lately. It feels like no matter how much sleep I get, I'm completely energy deprived. I have a Dr. Appointment on Monday so I hope they can help. I quit my job recently and it figures during another break something like this happens. It's nice to have a break from not working but I really just want to be able to enjoy it too. My energy has been so low, I haven't felt like I've been able to do much at all.
