The out of context quotes thread

[Mr.Fox]

'This is what I used to do for you when you were a baby'

*Dagmar stroking Bean's head*

'Shhhhhut up. Shhhhhhut up'

 

[Midoriya]

"You may know my every move, Mind Reader, and everything MAY be going your way... but! Did you predict this?"

*Batman takes out a stereo and it starts playing "Canned Heat" by Jamiroquai on it. Batman starts dancing and shaking his booty at Mind Reader*

"OH GOD... OH GOD I DIDN'T FORESEE THIS!" *Mind Reader screams and then runs away*

"Haha, yes! Gotham is safe once again thanks to the Dark Knight's twerking skills!"

*Commissioner Gordon walks up with a disturbed look on his face*

"I'm sorry, Batman, but WHAT THE ****?!?"

 

[Yoshi155]

Is he going to be all right, doctor?

Uh…

Is he going to live?!

…it’s a stick.

Damn it, don’t give me that medical jargon! Just tell me straight, is he gonna be okay?

 

[Captain Jigglypuff]

“Blood traitor! You’re nothing but a back stabbing cake traitor! I wish you could hear me!”
“But I can hear you! But you’re in our world. And in our world cake. Gets. Cut!”

 

[Yoshi155]

Mr. Chef, you’ve been found guilty of harassing a major record label. The full fee of $2 million will be handed over within 24 hours.

Do I look like I have $2 million?

Well, you have 24 hours to find it, or else you’ll have to go to jail for 8 million years.

(an officer whispers something into his ear)

Oh, sorry, you’ll go to jail for four years.

 

[-Blue-]

You are stupid! You are stupid! And don’t forget! You are stupid!

 

[-Mars-]

THAT WAS MY HUSBAND!!!

 

[QueenCobra]

“Who ordered the skank sandwich? I’m a skank sandwich, you wanna bite?”

 

[Yoshi155]

He can’t take care of himself! He’s only 35!

 

[SkyKnight03]

I am the eggman

 

[Mr.Fox]

'What happened to your face? It looks like an old catcher's mitt. - You've experienced a lifetime of smoking in 72 hours! - Your teeth are all brown...'

'No...look away, I'm...I'm hideous'

 

[Yoshi155]

As a robot living among humans, I’ve never really felt accepted at parties or nude beaches. So, I’ve always secretly wondered… what if I was 500 feet tall?

 

[rocketspruggs]

"What are you doing?"

"Trying to summon Satan."

"Why?"

"Nothing good on TV."

 

[Captain Jigglypuff]

“There’s no place like- I wanna be a witch!”

 

[Yoshi155]

You’ve killed me! You’ve killed me!

Oh, God, what have I done?

I just told you, you’ve killed me!

 

[Yoshi155]

What are you hacking off? Is it my torso? It is! My precious torso!

Hermes, quiet, I’m deducing things!

 

[Mr.Fox]

We’ll break their backs, gouge out their eyes, their evil hearts, we’ll pulverize

 

[Captain Jigglypuff]

“Well I’m sorry that I misjudged you, the Baroness.”
“Oh please. We’re friends now! Call me The.”

 

[Yoshi155]

Bender, mon, no one’s trying to run you over. Stop being a big hallucinating baby.

Yeah? Could a big hallucinating baby do this? *bursts into tears*

 

[Captain Jigglypuff]

“So what does your religion think about murder? Say I kill two guys, where do I stand?”

“Which two guys are we talking about here?”