Sexual Orientation & Gender Identity Support Thread

I think I officially came to the realization that I am in fact non-binary. In the instances that I’m referred to as either a boy or a girl, it makes me uncomfortable. Even sir feels off to me, and as AFAB, being referred to as a boy should be comfortable, right? Not in my case. I feel best when people use gender neutral terms or when their comments aren’t gendered at all. I think this was the confirmation I needed.
I think I have to accept the fact that I'm asexual (and, like, biromantic or something). w.w
Not that it's bad or anything, but with that and my mental illness I already feel so "broken".
I just wish I could be more normal, but I had to become a gamer. :,( <3
Congrats axaniao! Funny to see a post here at the same time I was writing.

Almost two years ago on this forum, I realised I wasn’t cis and decided on genderfluid. Well, as some of you might have seen I still had doubts about it at times but now I’m sure… very very sure I’m not cis. And I’ve come to realise how much I lean into feeling masc when I think about myself. Maybe this is actually a surprise to some people since I didn’t say I was anything but genderfluid, like it’s been two years and I never mentioned doubt seriously, so I must have just been sure right?

I’m not sure I’m saying much new here, but I do want to thank this forum for being here. I honestly think the accepting atmosphere here, and simply interacting with a forum again rather than Discord, helped me realise I was genderfluid in the first place. And right now I still identify that way. I’m just having a moment of reflection and… wondering about myself.

Not how I would fit some role but how I would express what it means to me. There’s too much about taking T I would hate, beard, oilier skin, permanent changes, potential hair loss but… I don’t know. I wonder how much better it would make me feel. I want the musculature. I kind of want top surgery. I want to cut my hair shorter and shorter (not that it’s strictly masculine, and sometimes I would want long hair anyway). I’m thinking about my name and even going from Emily to Emile… is that really all I want? Is that really all I want for my name? I wonder how far I wanna go with this.

Also, some of my accepting she/her has been for convenience. Not having to correct or confuse people et cetera. Because that itself would take me out of things. Has that only been settling? All-in-all I certainly feel more masculine than feminine looking at myself and my life though.

It’s weird when all these things are scary and medical procedures could be permanent and nobody has the exact same perspective, and society is how it is, you know? I need to get on vocal training at least.

I kind of feel like I’ve been cis enough to pass/live as cis if it makes sense? But I can’t ignore this feeling, most of the time I couldn’t, I just feel like I’ve reached some more understanding of myself right now even if I’m not sure on how I’m expressing it. I’ve had the feeling I’ve been waiting for life to start forever, for multiple reasons, but also wonder how this factors in.
I only get called my chosen name at work and it's irritating to not be at work because I have to respond to my birth name. My dad just refuses to call me anything other than my birth name and even when around people from my job, he'll refer to me as "the kid" or hey you" to avoid using my chosen name. It feels very invalidating and sometimes it feels like I'm asking for too much.
I apologize if you didn't want a response, but this really spoke to me. I have the same sentiment where the only place where my current name is used is at school (though I still get deadnamed pretty often). I still have to respond to my birth name at home, where my family doesn't know how to approach the situation, while others refuse to even acknowledge my name.

I just wanted to say that you're not asking for too much. You shouldn't feel bad or invalidated for wanting to be referred with your chosen name and pronouns. It's what makes you comfortable, and anyone who doesn't respect that are the ones who should be rebuked.
No, you're completely fine! I was hoping for responses to that post. It wasn't just a vent, but I was hoping for some reassurance that I'm not just asking for too much because my dad had been using my birth name my entire life, which would be 26 years. That's over a quarter of a century, and I know you can't be expected to change just like that.

I've made it known to my parents and even my mom calls me "Blue" which isn't ideal since it's not my chosen name, but it's better than my dead name, I suppose. Blue is just a nickname I've picked up from my hair color. My dad, who I've lived with almost my whole life just doesn't seem to acknowledge that I hate being referred to as my dead name. He just avoids it sometimes as I stated by not even using a name and calling me "the kid" or "you," and that's just as bad as using my dead name. I appreciate my mom for trying to understand.

I'm sorry you're dealing with this, as well. It's sad that the people we're supposed to be closest to are the ones who aren't grasping.
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Just thought it was time to delete it. My venting is done and I didn't want to disturb others. But it would just be nice to be listened to if someone (from any group) is gonna bother asking instead of rejecting your answer and just putting you into a box or rejecting your answer arguing about it.
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-deleted, sorry just rambling.
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I think most of my posts here have been regarding my gender, but I don't recall the last time I made a post in here regarding my sexual orientation. It's something I haven't thought about. I only ever dated women and have no desires to ever date someone male. I haven't dated in so long that my preferences weren't really something I thought about. I know for a fact I've only ever been attracted to women. The times that I thought a male was attractive was more aligned with gender envy because I'm non-binary, presenting more androgynous but I sometimes lean masculine. The gender envy came from the fact that I've always been seen as a female because of my assigned gender at birth, and I thought that maybe being born as a male would take all of that away.

I haven't had any desire to ever date a man or be in a romantic relation with one. I also haven't been openly searching for a relationship but I would be open to one. It's just that I haven't had the opportunity lately and I can't say whether or not I'd go through with it if someone expressed romantic feelings for me. It's hard to think about that I would do if I'm not in that situation.

As for my sexual orientation, I'm definitely some form of asexual - likely, apothisexual. I'm not sure if the part of me that would be okay with having sex is just me giving in because I know that almost nobody is willing to be with someone who refuses to have sex... but I also don't want to force myself to do something just to please somebody else. Is it possible to find someone okay with not having sex? Probably, but in the back of my mind... I'd feel that they actually aren't okay with it but they're only being considerate of my feelings. Like, they desire sex but they also don't want to force me into having it, so they just lie to themselves until they can't any longer, and then what? The relationship doesn't work out because one person doesn't get what they want out of it?

It makes me wonder if relationships are even worth all that trouble. Like, it's hard enough finding someone you genuinely vibe with, but being apothisexual on top of that?
I previously thought I was pansexual, but now I think I'm bisexual with a preference towards women. I was distressed over what sexuality I was again and thought I was straight for a few weeks. I decided to describe my sexuality in my journal to see if it would clear things up. At the end of writing about it I realized I am bi, just like I originally thought as a teenager.
putting this in a spoiler, but I would like some advice if anyone knows about this process. 💜

thinking abt making an appointment with my family doctor to talk about my chest. I'm at a point where it's not even necessarily dysphoria (I still stand firm on my gender identity even when I'm not wearing my binder bc my biology is not indicative of my gender), rather the fact that it feels like a parasite leeching off of my body. it feels like it's not part of me, I almost dissociate when I see it honestly. I think that dysphoria did play a role there, but now it's really just general discomfort. and I wear my binder so much because of it, I'm worried that I might damage breast tissue from wearing my binder so often (if I haven't already).

has anyone else gone through this process, or know someone who has? I don't even know how to get my foot in the door aside from talking to my family doctor. but I need to address this now because it's really only gonna get worse as I get older.
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I'm going swimming this weekend and got some awesome looking swim trunks and a sized up binder for swimming. For once, I'm actually excited about going. I used to feel so out of place and avoided looking at myself as much as possible in I guess more "feminine" looking swimwear, and I felt I would be judged everywhere if I went in what I really wanted to wear. My partner has been super helpful and encouraging about this, especially in situations where I'm having really bad anxiety, so I'm really happy and lucky to have her support (and my awesome trunks haha).
Happy pride month everyone

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Happy pride month, everyone!! I know there's a discussion to be had around purchasing pride items from big box stores vs smaller independent creators so I wanted to shout out a brand called PoppyandBagel!

When I was visiting @Saylor last month they had a little table set up at a festival we went to. They were both super sweet and their items are so cute!! They have more than just pride items, too.



She is sparkly!!
I'm feeling self-conscious (and dysphoric?) about my gender identity again. While I'm starting to embrace how I dress and present myself (masculine and/or gender-neutral), there's just that looming reminder that I will forever be perceived a girl because I have long hair and feminine features. I'm also questioning if certain people truly see me as NB or are just pretending to accept it, since I've met a few people (in real life) like that and it's left me cynical in that sense.

My dad told me something the other day, and I haven't stopped thinking about it since: "Just so you know, you're gonna confuse people with your gender identity." He didn't say anything further, and now I'm just wondering what the hell he meant by that. Even if he's right, I'm not changing myself for the sake of everyone who's unaccepting and intolerant. But, it kinda stung...

I just needed to rant for a bit.
I can't go into detail for personal reasons but after some time questioning my orientation, I've come to the conclusion that I may be omnisexual. This might change later, but for now I think that's how I'd describe myself best.

Just so you know, long hair isn't just a feminine feature. I know some guys have that too.
I'm aware of that, though a lot of people I know don't see it that way. I've thought of cutting my hair because of it, but I never got around to doing it.

To clarify, I look "traditionally feminine" (for lack of a better word) in the eyes of some people, even if I don't see myself that way.