Blondiexo
total trash
These are very prestigious!
Rockthemike13's and RedVelvetRabbit's Super Helpful Hotline!!!™ REDUCED RATES!
- Thread starter rockthemike13
- Start date
These are very prestigious!
rockthemike13
Senior Member
That's a pretty frickin big coincidence. The fat sausage cat is giving me a headache too! I would like to apologize first and foremost for the headaches Kyo is causing you. I share your pain, we may be able to work this out together.
This type of question would usually be directed to Velvet as she can actually understand the furry trash boat, but she apparently has better things to do on Memorial Day, and left me in the offices by my lonesome.
Behold, an actual sound recording from the innards of the THE SUPER HELPFUL HOTLINE!!!? offices.
http://vocaroo.com/i/s0GZRgLwaFMA
It is like this twenty four seven! I can't even think straight! KYO SHUT UP! Acknowledging him in ANY way makes it worst. He gets louder and louder and louder and louder AND LOUDER OMG PLEASE ((actual insane ramblings of Rockthemike13 as Kyo screams in his ear)).
For now there is only one known method of keeping him quiet.
http://vocaroo.com/i/s0TsW51vcQ98
If you listen carefully, what you are hearing is Kyo stifling his intolerable meows upon stuffing his fat roly poly face with treats. This is only effective for about 15 seconds, so stocking up on treats seems to be the way to go here.
I would kick him outdoors, but his contract is rock solid. He gets the building, the furniture, the food, all the love and affection.
I apologize I can't offer a much better solution to Kyo induced headaches other than "feed him treats or deal with it".
Hope you have a fantastic day, and thank you for contacting us at
THE SUPER HELPFUL HOTLINE!!!?
oh. And Kyo says bye too- http://vocaroo.com/i/s0GMD4UjL6Y1
staticistic1114
im hungry
This made me burst out laughing and definitely cheered me up. Thank you for this hotline. At the moment I don't have a question, but reading this thread is making me feel better. <3
RedVelvetRabbit
Senior Member
While I am not acquainted with this 'Reizo' fellow, I will say the answer here is actually very obvious! Whatever sorts of things Reizo normally loves, simply revolve everything you do around those things!
Does he drool over the smell of bacon? Start bathing in some bacon-scented perfume!
mmm...breakfasty.
Is his favorite color blue? Wear blue, dye your hair blue, paint your nails blue, he'll surely be looking at you.
"How do ya like me in my true form, babe? ;D ;D ;D"
Does he have a soft spot for cute little kittens and an uncontrollable urge to pet any he ever so comes across? Wear kittens on your clothes, wear kitty ears, you'll be the one he'll want to be petting.
"Go ahead pet them -- I-I meeean uhh, him!"
mmm...breakfasty.
Is his favorite color blue? Wear blue, dye your hair blue, paint your nails blue, he'll surely be looking at you.
"How do ya like me in my true form, babe? ;D ;D ;D"
Does he have a soft spot for cute little kittens and an uncontrollable urge to pet any he ever so comes across? Wear kittens on your clothes, wear kitty ears, you'll be the one he'll want to be petting.
"Go ahead pet them -- I-I meeean uhh, him!"
.......If none of that works, there's always hypnotism.
Always happy to help you get the guy or just that thing out of your eye at
THE SUPER HELPFUL HOTLINE!!!?
THE SUPER HELPFUL HOTLINE!!!?
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rockthemike13
Senior Member
So let me get this straight. You want to "walk down the path of a pregnant dinosaur"?
The solution is simple my friend! Merely go outside, and walk around. Chances are at one time or another a pregnant dinosaur claimed that very path.
And here's the best part, you don't even need to BE a pregnant dinosaur to have walked the path of a pregnant dinosaur! History and geology combined have answered your true calling. Your life is now a little more fulfilled, but no need to thank me, it's my job!
THE SUPER HELPFUL HOTLINE!!!?
2 for 1 deal! ALERT! ALERT!
staticistic1114 said:
As per our legal agreements, Twitch demands that she come to us. We would be more than happy to help the poor girl! Be a true pal, send her here! But don't take our word for it, just look at all the happy testimonials. The lack of testimonies all speak for themselves! Once a person asks us for help, they are truly fulfilled, and never need to ask us for help again. Yours truly-
THE SUPER HELPFUL HOTLINE!!!?
staticistic1114
im hungry
teach me how to be as awesome as you guys!♥
Stevey Queen
The Queen of Mimosas
I can't stop being fat and lonely. Help
RedVelvetRabbit
Senior Member
^ Pretty much just stock up on these.
Any kind will do. Though, he favors the creamy dairy ones
Glaceon2000
Senior Member
^ LOL, pretty much my cat xD. Great thread by the way, you guys are so funny xD.
staticistic1114
im hungry
How do I make friends?
rockthemike13
Senior Member
We here at the Super Helpful Hotline!!!? have a variety of tastes.
Lets start with Vel.
Her favorite band is the Spice Girls, closely followed by Evadermahence and John Mayer (not the good John Mayer, the evil one). I am not particularly fond of Vel's taste in music, and there are a lot of fights over the radio. You did ask what "awesome" bands we like, she does love The Beatles, and The Beatles are awesome.
Twitch is really into techno for some reason.
Kyo's favorite songs are -
As for me, I almost strictly love rock and roll and blues. We've all ready mentioned Frank Zappa. Others are George Harrison, BB King, Howling Wolf, Stevie Ray Vaughan, Led Zeppelin, The Beatles, Pink Floyd, The Doors, The Who, John Fogerty, Phish, Tom Waits, Grand Funk Railroad, The Rolling Stones, Guns N Roses, Peter Frampton, Muddy Waters, ZZ Top, Lynyrd Skynyrd, .38 Special, Joe Walsh (and The Eagles I guess) and so on so on. I believe that list will give you a fairly comprehensive idea of what I jam to.
There is a silly side, occasionally Vel and I will groove to Weird Al, Tenacious D and her absolute least favorite of all-
Hope that helped, thanks for contacting us, please come again.
RedVelvetRabbit
Senior Member
Hmmm...that's a tough one. It's not as easy as it looks, you see! I guess you could start by following in the footsteps of our basic everyday routine. But you have to balance it out juuust right.
To assure you're hitting the right numbers, I've conducted this pie chart:
Thanks for keeping our thread alive with your questions
We're happy you like us and we're always happy to help YOU, here at:
THE SUPER HELPFUL HOTLINE!!!?
To assure you're hitting the right numbers, I've conducted this pie chart:
Thanks for keeping our thread alive with your questions
We're happy you like us and we're always happy to help YOU, here at:
THE SUPER HELPFUL HOTLINE!!!?
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dear mike and wife of mike,
do u have any advice for some1 who is having trouble approaching younger women? i find younger, innocent looking girls more attractive, but i dont rly kno how to approach them without seeming creepy. how do u start a conversation with these girls? i need help. i dont want to lie and pretend i like justin bieber or smth, that seems kind of dishonest.
thx 4 ur help.
do u have any advice for some1 who is having trouble approaching younger women? i find younger, innocent looking girls more attractive, but i dont rly kno how to approach them without seeming creepy. how do u start a conversation with these girls? i need help. i dont want to lie and pretend i like justin bieber or smth, that seems kind of dishonest.
thx 4 ur help.
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