dear n,
i'm your first love since you broke someone's heart and cheated on them, and had over four years of no relationships or sexual encounters- and you were a real wild one as a teen! i wish i could send this letter, but of course i cannot. i know we're only two and a half months into our relationship, and i've found somebody else. i don't feel bad that i'm going behind your back, though, even though i really should. you're not going to be with me forever, and as you don't even trust me yet, i can see why. i do hope you'll find another guy or girl who you like (hopefully your normal type that you don't mind being seen out in public with) who can put up with all of your flaws and loves you as much as i do. you may smoke, drink heavily, overeat, be in tons of debt and live with your parents aged 22, but you were a great summer fling. it's a shame you didn't realise you were. if you were to read this, it'd be a sort of "i'm ending things now" letter, but i don't want to give you that truth yet. i don't know why, but i have the urge to crush you- serve you right for all the terrible things you've done to other girls and guys in the past, and hopefully you'll trust me eventually so i can do that in the most effective way. shame, though- as you're great in bed: a good person to lose my virginity to, so thank you for that deed you did in the most gallant and lovely way in july. i doubt i'll ever forget you- you are and were my first (proper) boyfriend, and you're really ****ing hot. idk, if i was older, and didn't have to get through university before being able to live with you someplace nice, we might've lasted beyond how long we do. still, i wish you all the best in the future- let this be a lesson in lying.
yours, o.