What's Bothering You?

trying to muster up the courage to tell this guy I like him and he hasn't seen my message yet and I'm just like hhhhhhh ;; anxiety is so real rn lol


OH GOD OH GOD I JUST TOLD THEM KSJDFKJSDKJFSKDJKFSJDK IDK WHAT TO DO SDHFJSHDFJSD

I'm so terrified that they'll reject me 😞
 
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I found some of my art online while looking at Beef Boss art. This is actually one of my biggest... Fears? I dunno, I just don't like the fact that I have my art thrown out there for anyone to see.
Edit: I guess to clarify, I have drawn some... Things that I'm... Not proud of... Which is putting it very mildly and I'm definitely scared of anybody seeing that.
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i should really lose weight but i have zero self control. i crave sweets and chips all the time, i skip breakfast so that probably contributes to it. i mean im not overweight but i don’t eat anything that’s actually good for me half the time, sometimes i just eat because im bored
 
so I basically learned the hard way that my computer absolutely ****s on itself and has a stroke when I'm simply trying to play a video with my editing software lol. luckily my brother is here to rescue me 😅😅
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also prob worth noting that when I tried to check the RAM and processor on my control panel both said "not available" lmao
 
I wish I had gotten better speech therapy as a kid. My elementary and middle schools put me in classes for other students on the autism spectrum, but the material wasn't what I needed. I could understand most facial expressions, expressions, and vocal tone just fine (with the exception of telling the difference between a tired face and a frustrated face). What I needed assistance with was establishing boundaries, initiating conversations irl, and maintaining eye contact. I never got help with any of those things, so I ended up trying to pick them through sheer practice. Thanks to that hard work I have become a pretty good texter. I can initiate and maintain online conversations with little thought. Sadly the three aspects I needed help with then are still present now. I have no idea how to set up boundaries with someone. The best eye contact I can give is switching between staring at someone's forehead and looking down to the floor. Unless I'm following a mental script I can't initiate conversations irl either. They're little difficulties that have added up over the years and I don't know where to find answers.
 
Those noobs over at neopets underoffering at one of my pets. Yeah I trained up this BD pets for nice, appropriate UCs offer not stuff I could get with regular converteds. Smh.

Also start working tomorrow after my vacation weeks off. I guess it's good but also wish I could have taken another week now ugh.
 
Had to cancel plans to hang out with my crush today and now I feel really bad.

Edit: I also just found out that my bestest online friend (on a seperate site and not on TBT), who recently returned from their month-long hiatus, is gonna be gone for another two weeks. :(
 
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I can't edit this video. the software is going ape**** every time I try to move the time marker so I can figure out where I need to trim. the audio also keeps going out of sync with the video, the audio will play without the video, and it makes some ungodly noises when it's trying to load. it's bc my computer's CPU and RAM get almost completely overloaded when i'm running this software.

I'm so incredibly frustrated with this. I just want to upload another yt video.
 
I’ve been with my favorite person most of the morning today and all I can think about is my crush. It’s pretty eye opening…
(No, they’re not the same person.)
 
I wish my NihonBox didn't come mid-August.

I wish Digimon Survive didn't come out in 12 days.

I wish my birthday wasn't 9 days away.

God, I hate waiting. All the good stuff always happens at the end of summer break.
 
i need to start saving money i’m horrible w money 😭 give me like $20 and i’ll find a way to spend it that same day
 
My brother decides to barge into my room while I'm playing Mario Kart Wii. He keeps distracting me (while I'm on Rainbow Road, no less). I keep telling him to get out, but he doesn't. Instead he starts telling ME to get out, even though he was in MY room. I don't see why he had to yell at me, though. I got so angry at him I almost smacked him with my Wii Remote.
 
my anxiety is really bad rn. I saw a thing on pinterest where someone was saying you don't have to love yourself to love others, and while a few people agreed there were also many people who said that they hated themselves but loved someone else and it just created so much disparity. and I'm worried bc I really like my friend and I hope our friendship/relationship ends up working out, but as it stands he has incredibly low self-esteem, no confidence, and almost nonexistent sense of self-worth. I wish there was something I could do to give him hope and make him see that there are decent people in the world and not everything is doomed to be miserable forever.

my mind is racing about this. I don't want to give up. but I also wonder if I'm just jumping into this because he's the first person who has ever shown any kind of genuine interest in me. I know I can't really change people but I really wish there was something I could do to give him even a shred of hope back. I'm so saddened to hear about what he's been through, he really doesn't deserve any of the treatment he's gotten from family and so-called friends/SOs.

I think my mind is hyper-focusing on this because I just realized I haven't taken my anxiety meds yet today. I do think this is a legitimate concern but I may also be overthinking it bc my anxiety gets crazy when I forget to take my meds. I guess I'll just have to let time do its thing and we'll see how this ends up.
 
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