What's Bothering You?

guysssss I somehow forgot to wash my face this morning and now I'm standing here at work lowkey feeling really gross hskfhsjdbsjd ๐Ÿ˜ฃ
ig it's not that big of a deal, I'll just have to remember to do it when I get home.
 
i feel like my face looks drastically different everyday and i think it has something to do with my hair, wavy hair is great on other people but i just hate it on myself ๐Ÿ˜ญ i wish i liked it but i wish i was born with straight hair, i donโ€™t know how to take care of my waves.

apparently youโ€™re not supposed to dry brush it (something i do) but how am i supposed to get tangles out??? why does hair have to be so difficult.
 
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Firstly, I've been having trouble sleeping all week. The unexpected incident (fire) has been bothering me so much that I just randomly wake up and don't want to go to back to sleep. I think I got 3-4 hours of sleep last night...

Also, I'm really annoyed by another forum. I wasn't even active on it anymore. But I started getting emails from them in my spam folder every couple of months. I decided I was sick of it, so I logged in to turn off the notifications and was reminded it's run on the same software as TBT. The actual problem, though? I was getting emails because the admin kept sending private messages asking me to donate money. Yes, it looks just like the private conversations on TBT, except it's basically unwanted spam and not an actual conversation.
I was already not happy with this forum because at some point they were being sponsored by some NFT thing. Ugh.
Okay, the worst part? This is supposed to be a forum for Tamagotchi fans. Yeeaaah...
 
- Cheems / Balltze died (I am deeply heartbroken and very much upset and have been extremely depressed about it all day).. To anyone who knows me I've always loved that silly little dog to the point he's become part of my internet alias. Hearing about his passing really broke my heart into 15 billion pieces and that was the absolute worst thing to wake up to this morning :^/

- Me and my somewhat bf got into it sorta last night after we've been doing so so so GOOD lately. And one thing lead to another and..
I ended up relapsing due to how upset I was and I regret it but.. I was very very upset AND in my head even though my feelings were valid.

- I have a migraine and I kinda just wanna roll into my bed and never come back out lol
 
turned 30 and am rewarded with a onslaught of recurring kidney stones and v-tach issues. my mother also needs a meningioma removed so that is a constant stressor and worry. also everything aging around me each time i age like color sucked into tartarus
 
I feel like I was actually getting better and I feel back at square oneโ€ฆ today was really bad, I canโ€™t pick myself up, I only wanted my boyfriend and we have our issues. I was just starting to feel relatively normal yesterday and this morning and justโ€ฆ poof. Canโ€™t try and motivate myself for much longer. Iโ€™m really sick again, my body is feeling everything.

I had so much I could have done this month, I regularly just get super asocial because I try to fix the root causes of my anxiety instead of burdening people. But it doesnโ€™t seem to work. I donโ€™t want to ebeg, I donโ€™t even want to be venting. I just want my life to change even a bit after everything Iโ€™ve done.

Iโ€™ve been here before, why do I keep ending up back here. ๐Ÿ’”
 
woke up this morning feeling congestion in my chest/head, it's almost like a burning feeling. this is how I was feeling when the air quality was bad too. I actually just checked Google Maps and yeah, the air quality is moderate here and it also says there's heavy smoke. I figured that's what I saw on my way to work yesterday, all that haze. :/
makes me feel so sad that this is still going on, not to mention just really physically unwell ๐Ÿ˜ž I guess I'm staying inside today.


as a side note, I'm so, so happy for the ISCs and seeing them win that galaxy swirl is so amazing!! but I haven't been able to express that joy because I just don't feel well at all this morning. if you guys see this, I'm very proud of you, yall definitely earned that. ๐Ÿ’œ
 
been loving work all summer but recently i'm feeling less and less appreciated there, and getting the rota this week almost confirmed they're not as 'impressed' by me as usual. it's literally a summer job and i'm leaving in 2 weeks so idk why i care this much but also i've been putting in so many hours there, i'd love it if they actually acknowledged it
 
Woke up today to the side part of my glasses snapping off. Apparently it needs some tiny screw to fix it but I can barely see the area around me, what makes you think Iโ€™d see something that small?
 
feeling tired again this evening ๐Ÿ˜”

sucks bc I have things I need to do, like finish laundry, and when I'm tired my executive dysfunction gets reeeeally bad. wish I could just go to bed now lol.
 
There's so many forests fires in BC right now and even though I'm all the way down near Vancouver, the sky is hazy and my car was covered in little ashy bits. I can only imagine the people closer to Kelowna.

Itโ€™s like being inside of a giant campfire
 
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