What's Bothering You?

tw: paranoia inducing, if you struggle with that sort of thing

i really don't think its normal to assume that there's POISON GAS when you start smelling something bad in the car. that was the first thing my mind jumped to and i almost had a panic attack. WHAT
 
Just having intrusive memories crawling in. Tbh its nothing serious. Petty internet moments. Still makes me feel lonelier.

I should be better than I am after knowing how much that kind of thing hurts but I still don’t trust people or that things would end up ok for me. It just seems like I’m always the one taking the fall if something goes wrong. I need to stop ending up in that position.

I really am better as a lurker because when I’m not trying to lead or inspire people or something I don’t end up in the line of fire. What a disappointment.
 
I kinda want to be included. I want to be invited to do things. I’m afraid to take the initiative 99% of the time. I feel like if they wanted to hang out with me, they’d invite me first. I feel like if I asked, they’ll be forced to say yes because they think I might feel left out. I want it to be because they want to and not because I asked.
 
When I was first diagnosed with autism… my mother HAD to tell my brother. Even after I asked her not to. He assured me he wouldn’t treat me any different and he’d do whatever he can to understand my disorder… yet he’s been using autism as an insult this entire time. Nonstop. Every time when I’m around too. I’m starting to regret spending my money on a Christmas present for this *******.
 
i know i complain here a lot but this is the only place i can really rant about stuff..

so i think i broke my 2ds xl and it’s gone for good thus why i don’t seem to be posting here as much as i used to. i tried looking at tutorial videos and other people’s advice for what to do but i honestly don’t know what’s wrong with it, it’s looks fine on the inside. my brother basically took apart the whole thing and we can’t find the issue.

apparently nintendo still repairs my model but the repair form is kind of weird because it asks what “symptom” my device has but it won’t let me write it. also i don’t have the money for a repair either rn, i could just buy a new 2ds from ebay or something when i have the money but some easily go up to $200!! i can use my brother’s 3ds in the meantime but it’s just not the same.. i have sentimental value with the one i broke..
 
Dim said:
When I was first diagnosed with autism… my mother HAD to tell my brother. Even after I asked her not to. He assured me he wouldn’t treat me any different and he’d do whatever he can to understand my disorder… yet he’s been using autism as an insult this entire time. Nonstop. Every time when I’m around too. I’m starting to regret spending my money on a Christmas present for this *******.
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if someone in my life insulted and made fun of me nonstop bc of my autism they would never see anything good from me. if they're not gonna respect something abt me that I literally have no control over then they don't deserve a shred of my respect either. I hate that you have to deal w that bc no autistic/ADHD person should ever be insulted bc of their neurodiversity. it's just cruel.



idk what to do about my cat. idk what her deal is but for like the last 3 weeks she's been pooping on the bathroom floor (both of our bathrooms) and it's never the kind that's easy to pick up either. it's disgusting and makes me feel sick. there's no reason for her to do it bc I literally cleaned my litter box before I went to bed to prevent such a thing from happening. and I have 5 other cats but none of them do that, they all use the litter box like normal cats. all I know is I'm really tired of dealing with it, especially bc my mom can't do anything majority of the time (she's disabled) and my dad just blatantly refuses to do anything, so the pressure is solely on me to pick up after her. I'm tired of it.
 
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xSuperMario64x said:
idk what to do about my cat. idk what her deal is but for like the last 3 weeks she's been pooping on the bathroom floor (both of our bathrooms) and it's never the kind that's easy to pick up either. it's disgusting and makes me feel sick. there's no reason for her to do it bc I literally cleaned my litter box before I went to bed to prevent such a thing from happening. and I have 5 other cats but none of them do that, they all use the litter box like normal cats. all I know is I'm really tired of dealing with it, especially bc my mom can't do anything majority of the time (she's disabled) and my dad just blatantly refuses to do anything, so the pressure is solely on me to pick up after her. I'm tired of it.
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Cats typically do this when they are trying to communicate that there is something wrong with them, e.g. stress, health problem, etc.
 
Chris said:
Cats typically do this when they are trying to communicate that there is something wrong with them, e.g. stress, health problem, etc.
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I figured as much but we've already talked to the vet once abt her and since she had roundworm they gave her meds to get rid of it. I think that took care of it, yet here she still is acting out. I guess I'll have to take her in to have her checked out.
(which sucks bc the base price for a vet bill is over $50 and I'm positive the final bill would end up being a lot more, but I just want her to feel better and not do this anymore)
 
I'm really struggling. I'm on Day 4/5 of an antibiotic course and the side effects are worse than the infection they are treating. As someone who has worked in microbiology I thoroughly understand the need to see the course through to the end, but I just feel so physically awful. Just 4 pills left. 🙏
 
xSuperMario64x said:
Snip
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My sister is also struggling with her ADHD in this way, I sympathize, friend. Try to prioritize the important things, like taking care of your body. I know it can be very hard



I just want to to take a deep breath without coughing.
I'm so tired, it's been like a month now... I can't even eat my Tom Nook cookies (and neither can anyone else because I kept licking the piping bag while icing them so they're all infected)
 
xSuperMario64x said:
I figured as much but we've already talked to the vet once abt her and since she had roundworm they gave her meds to get rid of it. I think that took care of it, yet here she still is acting out. I guess I'll have to take her in to have her checked out.
(which sucks bc the base price for a vet bill is over $50 and I'm positive the final bill would end up being a lot more, but I just want her to feel better and not do this anymore)
Click to expand...
update on this, I called the vet and luckily there was a cancelation today so I'm gonna take her there in about 2 hours. really hoping the vet can help her out bc I'm sure she doesn't feel well at all and I feel bad for her but I'm also tired of picking up after her constantly.
Post automatically merged:

Firesquids said:
My sister is also struggling with her ADHD in this way, I sympathize, friend. Try to prioritize the important things, like taking care of your body. I know it can be very hard
Click to expand...
I didn't expect a response but I really do appreciate it, it's gotten a bit better today but still a struggle for me. I just feel bad when my dad complains abt our living room not being swept, or the litter boxes needing cleaned, or the kitchen being a mess. it makes me feel like I'm somehow not trying hard enough. like I'm really just doing my best, and I'm trying not to drive myself crazy and push myself past my limits. I'm prob gonna get in contact w a local psychiatrist here soon to see if they can do a re-evalustion for me. (since the last one, where they diagnosed me with autism/ADHD/OCD among other things, was when I was 12 years old I think? so 11 years ago.)
 
My neighbours 2 cats have been at my house since the start of December. She was letting them stay outside all night in the snow which is why I brought them inside my place even though one of the cats Juice is mean af. No one can pet him or go near him or else he hisses & will even chase you to swat you lmao. He stays in the second bedroom. Even if you say his name "hello Mr Juice" he will start to low growl. Good thing I love mean cats. The neighbour said she would come get them this week so let's see if she sticks to her word.
 
Just generally in a bad mood right now and pissed at my family. Also stressed and unmotivated 'cause I have so much schoolwork piled up and I'm gonna have to work on it during my holiday break.
We saw a movie about war in history today and it was so hard to watch. War is already a heavy topic to start with, but the movie was also very violent and gory (stuff I'm sensitive to). It was so upsetting my best friend started crying as soon as we left the class.
This is not the first time something like this happened. Last week we saw a documentary about the Triangle Fire in 1911, and that was hard to watch too because we saw images and footage of burnt bodies. Worst of all, the teacher didn't give us any trigger warnings for either films.
 
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