What gender are you?

[Naiad]

Ok I've never heard of the words tranny and ****... My apologies for not knowing??

If someone calls himself/herself I'm a transsexual then he/she is admitting to it so I don't see why he/she would be hurt when others say that (in situations where someone literally asks is ____ a transsexual?)

It's like a French woman getting offended in Spain by Spanish people calling her Mary when her name is Marie but introduced herself as Mary in the first place... If you don't want to be called something then don't introduce yourself as one hence don't refer yourself as w/e you don't want people to describe you as.

But in this case they're making it their word
I can call myself a chink, which is alright, because I'm Chinese (Mixed, technically, but w/e). However, that doesn't give anyone else the right, especially those who are not Chinese, to call me a chink.

I think that's what they're trying to get at??

 

[lithiumlatte]

Ok I've never heard of the words tranny and ****... My apologies for not knowing??

If someone calls himself/herself I'm a transsexual then he/she is admitting to it so I don't see why he/she would be hurt when others say that (in situations where someone literally asks is ____ a transsexual?)

It's like a French woman getting offended in Spain by Spanish people calling her Mary when her name is Marie but introduced herself as Mary in the first place... If you don't want to be called something then don't introduce yourself as one hence don't refer yourself as w/e you don't want people to describe you as.

It's okay, just know that they are examples of slurs.
If your friends, really and truly want you to call them as such, and they've asked you to then fine. Emphasis on you, bc like I say it may be their attempts to reclaim the word just between each other and may not take too kindly to someone outside the community doing that.
But for the huge majority of the community, it would be considered offensive, and drawing attention to the surgery issue when it's not needed. So you should keep this in mind. x

EDIT: nico's post nailed it! thank you x

 

[lunathenia]

But in this case they're making it their word
I can call myself a chink, which is alright, because I'm Chinese (Mixed, technically, but w/e). However, that doesn't give anyone else the right, especially those who are not Chinese, to call me a chink.

I think that's what they're trying to get at??

No, if you call yourself a chink or oriental but you get offended when other people call you that, that's stupid. Why? Because those words were invented by racist white ****s with the intent of mocking the race. Actually, it's worse that you'd even use the words when describing yourself.

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It's okay, just know that they are examples of slurs.
If your friends, really and truly want you to call them as such, and they've asked you to then fine. Emphasis on you, bc like I say it may be their attempts to reclaim the word just between each other and may not take too kindly to someone outside the community doing that.
But for the huge majority of the community, it would be considered offensive, and drawing attention to the surgery issue when it's not needed. So you should keep this in mind. x

EDIT: nico's post nailed it! thank you x

Nico's post did NOT nail it. If any South East Asian referred to themselves as a chink or Oriental I'd tell them to go look up the intent of the words when it was invented.

Why on Earth would you call yourself terms that were coined to derail you by another race that was racist... Beats me.

 

[Naiad]

No, if you call yourself a chink or oriental but you get offended when other people call you that, that's stupid. Why? Because those words were invented by racist white ****s with the intent of mocking the race. Actually, it's worse that you'd even use the words when describing yourself.

Alright, since that explanation obviously wasn't clear enough, here's this one.

Suppose that you're in your crew, where b**** has become an accepted word to call each other. In your group, the word has taken on an affectionate meaning, and there's no problem calling each other that.

Does that give you the right to walk up to strangers and call them b****? No. According to the rest of the world, it's still an insult.

 

[Aryxia]

No, if you call yourself a chink or oriental but you get offended when other people call you that, that's stupid. Why? Because those words were invented by racist white ****s with the intent of mocking the race. Actually, it's worse that you'd even use the words when describing yourself.

What gives you the right to tell someone what they should and shouldn't call themselves? It can easily be seen as empowering, especially if you perceive it as "I'm going to take your slurs and make them my own. I'm gonna wear them as a badge of honour, because your skewed opinion isn't worth jack ****."

Anyway, we should probably drop this whole thing or move it somewhere else so this thread doesn't get locked.

 

[lunathenia]

What gives you the right to tell someone what they should and shouldn't call themselves? It can easily be seen as empowering, especially if you perceive it as "I'm going to take your slurs and make them my own. I'm gonna wear them as a badge of honour, because your skewed opinion isn't worth jack ****."

Go ahead. If you're an Asian go ahead and call yourself an Oriental. I get that you don't understand some racist white ****s coined the term. Call youself a rug or w.e else if you want to. But don't get offended when someone else calls you by that exact term.

 

[lithiumlatte]

No, if you call yourself a chink or oriental but you get offended when other people call you that, that's stupid. Why? Because those words were invented by racist white ****s with the intent of mocking the race. Actually, it's worse that you'd even use the words when describing yourself.

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Nico's post did NOT nail it. If any South East Asian referred to themselves as a chink or Oriental I'd tell them to go look up the intent of the words when it was invented.

Why on Earth would you call yourself terms that were coined to derail you by another race that was racist... Beats me.

I was referring to how it was a good explanation of what reclaiming a word means, not specifically the word chink.
I do see your point of view that 1. yes it is racist if used by anyone else, and the origins absoultely should not be ignored. Personally I too wish that nobody had to use slurs against themselves!
But I suppose it could comparable to how members of the lgbtqa community may call themselves fags, to try to take a word used against them, to hurt them and turn it into something else? Aryxia phrased this excellently!

Let's see if nico has any other thoughts?

Go ahead. If you're an Asian go ahead and call yourself an Oriental. I get that you don't understand some racist white ****s coined the term. Call youself a rug or w.e else if you want to. But don't get offended when someone else calls you by that exact term.

Okay look at this way, compare it to how black people have reclaimed the word 'nig*er', in the way that Aryxia explained. That does not make it acceptable for a white person to say that, as it is racist and they should absolutely be offended by it.

 

[zoetrope]

I know I said I was done posting in this thread but whatever. Here goes.

This is what GLAAD says about using the word 'queer' in media or press:

"Traditionally a pejorative term, queer has been appropriated by some LGBT people to describe themselves. However, it is not universally accepted even within the LGBT community and should be avoided unless describing someone who self-identifies that way or in a direct quote. When Q is seen at the end of "LGBT," it typically means queer and/or questioning."

Basically, the word has been appropriated (or re appropriated) by some people in the gay community but, as they stated, some people are still offended by or uneasy with its use. They don't flatout say 'don't use this' but they say it should be avoided unless it is a quote or if someone self identifies as queer. This is the same way with your friends. If they refer to themselves as transsexual (I.e. I am a transsexual) then that is ok. But one should shy away from using that term in that way outside of that situation. For example, don't walk up to a transgender person who you don't know and call them a transsexual.

Edit: also, I think this has been a really good dialogue but this has become verrrry off topic. So I'm done. FOR REALZ.

 

[lunathenia]

What gives you the right to tell someone what they should and shouldn't call themselves? It can easily be seen as empowering, especially if you perceive it as "I'm going to take your slurs and make them my own. I'm gonna wear them as a badge of honour, because your skewed opinion isn't worth jack ****."

Anyway, we should probably drop this whole thing or move it somewhere else so this thread doesn't get locked.

I didn't "tell" anyone that they have/don't have the right to call themselves. What I'm saying is if you're going around calling yourself some dumb ****ing term b/c you obviously don't know/understand/care about the true intent of the words then don't get ****ing offended when someone else calls you by that same term. Get it now?

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What gives you the right to tell someone what they should and shouldn't call themselves? It can easily be seen as empowering, especially if you perceive it as "I'm going to take your slurs and make them my own. I'm gonna wear them as a badge of honour, because your skewed opinion isn't worth jack ****."

Anyway, we should probably drop this whole thing or move it somewhere else so this thread doesn't get locked.

Also it's not your place to budge into a non heated discussion and call my opinion a jack **** when all the people here were just trying to understand each other's perspective and shed some light. Go **** yourself.

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Alright, since that explanation obviously wasn't clear enough, here's this one.

Suppose that you're in your crew, where b**** has become an accepted word to call each other. In your group, the word has taken on an affectionate meaning, and there's no problem calling each other that.

Does that give you the right to walk up to strangers and call them b****? No. According to the rest of the world, it's still an insult.

Ok this case I understand. But if you call yourself a term that another race coined and call yourself that casually then don't get offended when someone else who hears yourself calling yourself that term calls you by that term....

 

[Aryxia]

I didn't "tell" anyone that they have/don't have the right to call themselves. What I'm saying is if you're going around calling yourself some dumb ****ing term b/c you obviously don't know/understand/care about the true intent of the words then don't get ****ing offended when someone else calls you by that same term. Get it now?

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Also it's not your place to budge into a non heated discussion and call my opinion a jack **** when all the people here were just trying to understand each other's perspective and shed some light. Go **** yourself.

I wasn't calling your opinion jack ****. I was calling the racist *******'s opinion ****. And the meaning and history can be where the empowerment can come through- Some people, not me, have said that by reclaiming their slurs, they have achieved a sense of "You put me through all this ****, and I've conquered it. What now?"

 

[lunathenia]

I was referring to how it was a good explanation of what reclaiming a word means, not specifically the word chink.
I do see your point of view that 1. yes it is racist if used by anyone else, and the origins absoultely should not be ignored. Personally I too wish that nobody had to use slurs against themselves!
But I suppose it could comparable to how members of the lgbtqa community may call themselves fags, to try to take a word used against them, to hurt them and turn it into something else? Aryxia phrased this excellently!

Let's see if nico has any other thoughts?



Okay look at this way, compare it to how black people have reclaimed the word 'nig*er', in the way that Aryxia explained. That does not make it acceptable for a white person to say that, as it is racist and they should absolutely be offended by it.

I personally would never call someone a nig*er or a *** or anything else but if you call yourself that all the time then you're bound to be called by that by someone outside the "community." What I'm saying is since you're calling yourself that so often, don't get offended when someone outside the "community" calls you that (unless they say it with negativity behind it).

 

[lithiumlatte]

I personally would never call someone a nig*er or a *** or anything else but if you call yourself that all the time then you're bound to be called by that by someone outside the "community." What I'm saying is since you're calling yourself that so often, don't get offended when someone outside the "community" calls you that (unless they say it with negativity behind it).

There's no need to airquote community. You're implying it's some made up thing by doing that...
That's the thing your missing, it is racist when a white person says it, whether or not the person they're saying it to calls their friends that. And that's the end of it. I'm sure you know the origins of the word, and about the oppression of black people so you must see why it's not okay. The bird fighting back against the cat, does not change the bird into a predator.

Alright, since that explanation obviously wasn't clear enough, here's this one.

Suppose that you're in your crew, where b**** has become an accepted word to call each other. In your group, the word has taken on an affectionate meaning, and there's no problem calling each other that.

Does that give you the right to walk up to strangers and call them b****? No. According to the rest of the world, it's still an insult.

I wasn't calling your opinion jack ****. I was calling the racist *******'s opinion ****. And the meaning and history can be where the empowerment can come through- Some people, not me, have said that by reclaiming their slurs, they have achieved a sense of "You put me through all this ****, and I've conquered it. What now?"

This! good explanations.
It's been great to have a respectful conversion, but I think zoetrope is right - we're delving too far into race right now, and it's off topic to the thread.

 

[Aryxia]

If you guys wanna keep discussing this, I'm making a new thread for it. I don't wanna see this one get closed. Edit: Never mind! I hope there's no hard feelings about this, after all, the lack of tone in internet conversations leads to misunderstandings all the time ^.^;;

 

[lunathenia]

I wasn't calling your opinion jack ****. I was calling the racist *******'s opinion ****. And the meaning and history can be where the empowerment can come through- Some people, not me, have said that by reclaiming their slurs, they have achieved a sense of "You put me through all this ****, and I've conquered it. What now?"

Oh I missed the quotations. My bad. Ok that makes sense. I get what you're saying but again I personally wouldn't b/c I don't see it as empowerment but I do "get" why some people would. All personal preference.

 

[Aryxia]

Oh I missed the quotations. My bad. Ok that makes sense. I get what you're saying but again I personally wouldn't b/c I don't see it as empowerment but I do "get" why some people would. All personal preference.

No worries ^.^ I don't really like it either since it can create an "Us vs. Them" mentality, but eh. It's more about the way you raise your kids than the words you use, right?

 

[Naiad]

Ok this case I understand. But if you call yourself a term that another race coined and call yourself that casually then don't get offended when someone else who hears yourself calling yourself that term calls you by that term....

Ahh, but man coined that term to insult mainly women. If females call each other that word (In the Crew), it doesn't mean they're letting a man 'win' over them. They're just using it as an affectionate term, an insult they've 'claimed' as their own.

Edit: when you get ninja'd :^)

 

[lunathenia]

No worries ^.^ I don't really like it either since it can create an "Us vs. Them" mentality, but eh. It's more about the way you raise your kids than the words you use, right?

Welp, getting harder to control kids these days and I imagine even more so in the future (btw I'm still a "kid" as in not old enough to manage kids)

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Ahh, but man coined that term to insult mainly women. If females call each other that word (In the Crew), it doesn't mean they're letting a man 'win' over them. They're just using it as an affectionate term, an insult they've 'claimed' as their own.

I see why people would think that but I personally never would. I hate it when other girls/women call me a b**** or w.e else and anyone else. It probably has to do with the fact that I grew up in a strict-ish family. No matter who you are, if you call me a b**** my reaction is 1) blank faced 2) uhh no **** you my name is not a *****

 

[Moddie]

This went off topic quickly. I'm surprised a mod hasn't to tell us to tone it down.
Anyway, while we're on slurs. I refer to myself as queer. Both when talking about my gender, and my sexuality. Generally I use the term genderqueer to refer to myself. (Here I use the term 'non-binary' as it's more excepted outside the transgender community.) And I use queer to describe my sexuality as most people don't know what asexuality is. In spaces were it's more acceptable I use queer in place of lgbta or the longer versions such as - LGBTQQIP2SAA, because the acronym is confusing, too long and I've never seen it be fully inclusive.

It's normal for groups of people to take back words that were normally used against them, and it is empowering. In that when I hear that word now I no longer think of all the times it was used as an insult towards me, but rather the community itself and how I'm not alone within it.

 

[RosieThePeppyCat]

I'm a girl but everyone thinks I'm a boy because of my voice *facepalm*

 

[Moddie]

I'm a girl but everyone thinks I'm a boy because of my voice *facepalm*

Aww, that's a shame.