Oh sweet pea I wish I could give you a hug. Some people are toxic to be around but you know this. Some people making breathing feel worth it. I can't say I understand what you're going through. But what I can say is, one day you'll have surrounded yourself with people you love and trust. One day, the things that are bothering you will be a closed book on the shelf. One day, you'll be able to look out and smile knowing you made your life your own. No one can take that from you. The struggle, the pain, all of that will be worth it to make it out on the other side. You'll be stronger and wiser knowing who to let in thanks to these people. They won't deserve your smile. Do what you can now to distance yourself from them. Little by little, day by day make steps to get away~ and one day, you'll be happier and healthier and far away from their mess. I'm sorry you're going through this. If you need a hand to pull you out of the pool for awhile PM me. I'll be an ear~