Wrote this for our school's paper.

[fabiolovessunate]

I wrote this for my school's newspaper. Probably one of the best things I've written. I honestly think I'm going to become a relationship counselor. It was because it was the Valentines Day (the dumbest 'holiday' ever) issue.

Struggling in the relationship department, guys?

Relationships (romantic or not) are a part of our every-day lives. We all strive (consciously or not) to succeed in both of those areas, for a few simple reasons; nobody wants to be alone. Success in both of those fields are measured by... what, exactly?

I can't exactly tell you how to measure your success in any one relationship, but I can tell you how to create relationships, despite whatever shortcomings you might have. People ask me, "How can I get him/her to notice me? Is is the way I dress? The way I smell?" And my answer is, unfailingly, "None of the above."

Getting 'that special someone' to notice you isn't about the clothes you wear, how much acne you have, or how athletic you are. It's all about how you carry yourself. What do I mean by this?

Let's say that both exhibit A and B are average looking males, both competing for the eye of exhibit C, our female. They were the same brand of clothing, cologne, etc. But here's the difference; exhibit A is outgoing, walks with confidence, smiles, and is never afraid to strike up conversation. Exhibit B, on the other hand, is shy, stays out of the limelight, and doesn't talk much. Now, none of these are personality traits (save for the shyness, maybe), whether you want to believe it or not.

So who gets the girl? I think it's quite obvious. See, when you take away the variables and create a situation as I have, you realize that it isn't about any one tangible thing that gets you noticed; it's being fun, getting yourself out there, all with confidence.

I'm not saying that this is an instant fix to your problems. It'll take time to change habits. Look, Babe Ruth struck out over 1,300 times. Michael Jordan missed more than 9,000 shots in his career. But Babe stepped up to the plate and took his cuts, and Jordan took his shots, which is exactly why they're considered a success. It isn't (all) about money, power, or looks; it's about what kind of man you are.

And that's the whole truth. I don't get girls because I'm just that much better looking, or that much stronger, or smarter; I'm just confident with myself as an individual, and women notice that.

 

[Gnome]

For those who are lazy.

tl;dr Confident people get the ladies/men.

 

[Tyeforce]

Those "rules" don't apply to everyone and every situation, though. You can be shy and unnoticed and still find that perfect person.

 

[fabiolovessunate]

Those "rules" don't apply to everyone and every situation, though. You can be shy and unnoticed and still find that perfect person.

In a typical high school setting, that situation is very unlikely.

 

[coffeebean!]

Nice article, and I somewhat agree with Tye and somewhat with you. In your average high school, the outgoing guy is bound to get the girl but then again, some girls like shy quiet guys, so it all depends on the girl and the situation.

 

[fabiolovessunate]

Nice article, and I somewhat agree with Tye and somewhat with you. In your average high school, the outgoing guy is bound to get the girl but then again, some girls like shy quiet guys, so it all depends on the girl and the situation.

Well, I'd say (at least in my experience) 9 times out of 10, outgoing defeats shy in the game of relationship rock, paper, scissors.

 

[Tyeforce]

Those "rules" don't apply to everyone and every situation, though. You can be shy and unnoticed and still find that perfect person.

In a typical high school setting, that situation is very unlikely.

It a high school setting, yes. But it also depends on who you're trying to get... Your rules only apply if you're going for the popular people. If both you and the other person are both shy and not very outgoing, you probably won't have much competition, so it's much more likely to work out. Of course, one of you will have to break the shyness if you want to start anything, but that doesn't mean you have to completely change your personality.

I'm glad that I met my boyfriend over Animal Crossing, lol. I didn't have to go through a lot of the drama of high school. >_>

 

[fabiolovessunate]

Those "rules" don't apply to everyone and every situation, though. You can be shy and unnoticed and still find that perfect person.

In a typical high school setting, that situation is very unlikely.

It a high school setting, yes. But it also depends on who you're trying to get... Your rules only apply if you're going for the popular people. If both you and the other person are both shy and not very outgoing, you probably won't have much competition, so it's much more likely to work out. Of course, one of you will have to break the shyness if you want to start anything, but that doesn't mean you have to completely change your personality.

I'm glad that I met my boyfriend over Animal Crossing, lol. I didn't have to go through a lot of the drama of high school. >_>

I disagree. I don't believe (aside from shyness, I guess) anything I mentioned included changing your personality. I also don't think that coming out of your shell and being fun, social, and outgoing only caters to 'popular' people.

 

[bittermeat]

It needs to overlook the other side of the high school spectrum in my opinion.

 

[fabiolovessunate]

It needs to overlook the other side of the high school spectrum in my opinion.

I don't understand what you just stated.

 

[bittermeat]

It needs to overlook the other side of the high school spectrum in my opinion.

I don't understand what you just stated.

I mean, it could give advice for other situations of boy/girl matches.
It only expresses one boy/girl point of view.

 

[fabiolovessunate]

It needs to overlook the other side of the high school spectrum in my opinion.

I don't understand what you just stated.

I mean, it could give advice for other situations of boy/girl matches.
It only expresses one boy/girl point of view.

I see what you're getting at, but I'm just talking in a general situation. Whether you're a nerd, jock, emo, whatever, if you're confident with who you are as a person, people will notice.

 

[Tyeforce]

Those "rules" don't apply to everyone and every situation, though. You can be shy and unnoticed and still find that perfect person.

In a typical high school setting, that situation is very unlikely.

It a high school setting, yes. But it also depends on who you're trying to get... Your rules only apply if you're going for the popular people. If both you and the other person are both shy and not very outgoing, you probably won't have much competition, so it's much more likely to work out. Of course, one of you will have to break the shyness if you want to start anything, but that doesn't mean you have to completely change your personality.

I'm glad that I met my boyfriend over Animal Crossing, lol. I didn't have to go through a lot of the drama of high school. >_>

I disagree. I don't believe (aside from shyness, I guess) anything I mentioned included changing your personality. I also don't think that coming out of your shell and being fun, social, and outgoing only caters to 'popular' people.

Some people would rather keep to themselves and not socialize much than be outgoing like that. I'm not saying it's a bad thing, because it certainly isn't, but some people don't want to live like that and shouldn't have to change. Neither me nor Andrew like to socialize much. We're both completely content just being with each other and playing video games. Socializing just isn't for us, and the same is true for other people. If you really want to find the perfect person for you, you shouldn't try to change any part of you, because you want a person who will love you for who you are, not for who you're not.

 

[bittermeat]

It needs to overlook the other side of the high school spectrum in my opinion.

I don't understand what you just stated.

I mean, it could give advice for other situations of boy/girl matches.
It only expresses one boy/girl point of view.

I see what you're getting at, but I'm just talking in a general situation. Whether you're a nerd, jock, emo, whatever, if you're confident with who you are as a person, people will notice.

Ah. I see where what mean. Pretty much agree.
Good article.

 

[fabiolovessunate]

Those "rules" don't apply to everyone and every situation, though. You can be shy and unnoticed and still find that perfect person.

In a typical high school setting, that situation is very unlikely.

It a high school setting, yes. But it also depends on who you're trying to get... Your rules only apply if you're going for the popular people. If both you and the other person are both shy and not very outgoing, you probably won't have much competition, so it's much more likely to work out. Of course, one of you will have to break the shyness if you want to start anything, but that doesn't mean you have to completely change your personality.

I'm glad that I met my boyfriend over Animal Crossing, lol. I didn't have to go through a lot of the drama of high school. >_>

I disagree. I don't believe (aside from shyness, I guess) anything I mentioned included changing your personality. I also don't think that coming out of your shell and being fun, social, and outgoing only caters to 'popular' people.

Some people would rather keep to themselves and not socialize much than be outgoing like that. I'm not saying it's a bad thing, because it certainly isn't, but some people don't want to live like that and shouldn't have to change. Neither me nor Andrew like to socialize much. We're both completely content just being with each other and playing video games. Socializing just isn't for us, and the same is true for other people. If you really want to find the perfect person for you, you shouldn't try to change any part of you, because you want a person who will love you for who you are, not for who you're not.

I think that playing video games is a form of social interaction (however watered down it may be). Read my above post for a better explanation of what I'm really trying to say.

 

[Kyle]

Those "rules" don't apply to everyone and every situation, though. You can be shy and unnoticed and still find that perfect person.

In a typical high school setting, that situation is very unlikely.

It a high school setting, yes. But it also depends on who you're trying to get... Your rules only apply if you're going for the popular people. If both you and the other person are both shy and not very outgoing, you probably won't have much competition, so it's much more likely to work out. Of course, one of you will have to break the shyness if you want to start anything, but that doesn't mean you have to completely change your personality.

I'm glad that I met my boyfriend over Animal Crossing, lol. I didn't have to go through a lot of the drama of high school. >_>

I disagree. I don't believe (aside from shyness, I guess) anything I mentioned included changing your personality. I also don't think that coming out of your shell and being fun, social, and outgoing only caters to 'popular' people.

Some people would rather keep to themselves and not socialize much than be outgoing like that. I'm not saying it's a bad thing, because it certainly isn't, but some people don't want to live like that and shouldn't have to change. Neither me nor Andrew like to socialize much. We're both completely content just being with each other and playing video games. Socializing just isn't for us, and the same is true for other people. If you really want to find the perfect person for you, you shouldn't try to change any part of you, because you want a person who will love you for who you are, not for who you're not.

not healthy. period.
Humans need to socialize

 

[Tyeforce]

It needs to overlook the other side of the high school spectrum in my opinion.

I don't understand what you just stated.

I mean, it could give advice for other situations of boy/girl matches.
It only expresses one boy/girl point of view.

I see what you're getting at, but I'm just talking in a general situation. Whether you're a nerd, jock, emo, whatever, if you're confident with who you are as a person, people will notice.

Oh, okay. I agree, confidence is something everyone should have. That's not changing who you are, it's changing how you feel about yourself.

 

[Tyeforce]

Quoting limited to 5 levels deep

It a high school setting, yes. But it also depends on who you're trying to get... Your rules only apply if you're going for the popular people. If both you and the other person are both shy and not very outgoing, you probably won't have much competition, so it's much more likely to work out. Of course, one of you will have to break the shyness if you want to start anything, but that doesn't mean you have to completely change your personality.

I'm glad that I met my boyfriend over Animal Crossing, lol. I didn't have to go through a lot of the drama of high school. >_>

I disagree. I don't believe (aside from shyness, I guess) anything I mentioned included changing your personality. I also don't think that coming out of your shell and being fun, social, and outgoing only caters to 'popular' people.

Some people would rather keep to themselves and not socialize much than be outgoing like that. I'm not saying it's a bad thing, because it certainly isn't, but some people don't want to live like that and shouldn't have to change. Neither me nor Andrew like to socialize much. We're both completely content just being with each other and playing video games. Socializing just isn't for us, and the same is true for other people. If you really want to find the perfect person for you, you shouldn't try to change any part of you, because you want a person who will love you for who you are, not for who you're not.

not healthy. period.
Humans need to socialize

We still socialize, but not very often. Parties and other social gatherings just aren't our thing. All we need is each other to be happy. We do have friends that we talk to and sometimes do stuff with, but we enjoy being together more than anything else. I agree, being a complete hermit isn't a good thing, but some people just aren't the social type, and that's fine.

 

[Kyle]

Quoting limited to 5 levels deep

I disagree. I don't believe (aside from shyness, I guess) anything I mentioned included changing your personality. I also don't think that coming out of your shell and being fun, social, and outgoing only caters to 'popular' people.

Some people would rather keep to themselves and not socialize much than be outgoing like that. I'm not saying it's a bad thing, because it certainly isn't, but some people don't want to live like that and shouldn't have to change. Neither me nor Andrew like to socialize much. We're both completely content just being with each other and playing video games. Socializing just isn't for us, and the same is true for other people. If you really want to find the perfect person for you, you shouldn't try to change any part of you, because you want a person who will love you for who you are, not for who you're not.

not healthy. period.
Humans need to socialize

We still socialize, but not very often. Parties and other social gatherings just aren't our thing. All we need is each other to be happy. We do have friends that we talk to and sometimes do stuff with, but we enjoy being together more than anything else. I agree, being a complete hermit isn't a good thing, but some people just aren't the social type, and that's fine.

That's fine then
Just talking with one dude wouldn't, your case is fine though

 

[Megamannt125]

You make it seem so easy.
For a person like me, being outgoing and not shy would be very difficult.