What's Bothering You?

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i have lost all desire to live tbh lol i'm such a dumb idiot and a loser and i always take stuff too far which causes people to get pissed at me and i never learn from my actions. i wish it wasn't christmas..
 
i have lost all desire to live tbh lol i'm such a dumb idiot and a loser and i always take stuff too far which causes people to get pissed at me and i never learn from my actions. i wish it wasn't christmas..

I don't know you or your situation but please don't feel this way! <3



I clicked one second too late on checkout and my candy cane is time stamped with 4:01 instead of 4:00 ;o; stupid to care about I know, but it's bothering me rip
 
Ffs I'm trying to take a **** and my mum's texting me like "Oi! What are you doing?" like I know it's Christmas and all but leT ME CRAP IN PEACE HNNNNNNNNDBDBSN"_9"_8%8'8%'^"IGCICVVHOV7#??!6+633+6
 
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My favorite rank battle in splatoon just start and is when my brother decide to play his ps4 :( and I can't play and he say IL play when he leave for work
But when that time come there very little time left like half an hour :(

Mother why you damage my brother computer
 
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ohhhh my god i got a ps4 today but my brother and his friend are hogging it. i wanna play it too.. ;~;
 
Even though I've been in College since January, I've only had online classes. But starting on January 17th, I'm going to attend courses on campus, and while I may seem social online, I am the opposite irl. Not in a two-faced kind of way, but people irl make me uncomfortable. I have trust issues after a very rough couple of years, and I'm no good with strangers. I'm also quite self-conscious. I'm so scared. I'm gonna be super nervous whether I see someone I know or someone I don't know. I have no idea which would be worse. I'm gonna be unhappy either way :(
 
omg my skin is so horrible right now cuz of all the medication i'm on. literal huge red zits ALL over like a damn pepperoni pizza. i'm so fat and flabby too lol and my hair is too short and damaged i wanna drive off a bridge
 
Okay, I just remembered something and I'm angry now.
So there's this large group comprised of more than half of my batch mates, and they all love going out and drinking. I'm good friends with some of them since they are my batch mates, but I'm not included in the group of friends because I don't go out as frequently as they do. One of my good friends recently thought that they should include me in the group too since, as I said, I'm close with a bunch of them. They said they had to "initiate" me by letting me go out with them to drink and party and stuff, and at first I thought, "Cool, I'm going to be one of them too, I just have to survive a couple of hours being uncomfortable at a party and they'll accept me," but then I realized like right now how ****ty it actually sounded?? I mean what the hell, I'm not going to get stressed in public just so these people will accept me and become my friend, friendships just happen and true friends accept one another from the very beginning, not because they did something uncomfortable that was pleasing/amusing to the other.

I'm not going to accept my friend's offer into the group lmao I don't need to adjust to them to have more friends, I prefer those I can personally know better and accept my introverted "sometimes-I-want-to-go-out-and-sometimes-I-want-to-be-alone" self, and I have no reason to be jealous of not being in the group when their system of expanding the group is ****ty tbh :^)

Also if I want to drink, I'm going to drink for myself and not so that others will accept me lol. Gotta maintain my alcohol intake bc I'm allergic to too much alcohol.
 
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Super tired even though tonight was the first night I got decent sleep. Have so many things to do these next few days off that I have. Le sigh. Better make a list like I always do and only accomplish half the things on it...
 
the uncertainty of not knowing if you're okay. if we're okay. if i need to just make myself disappear or not..
 
Our shower is still broken and everyone is rushing to get a bath before going out. Stressful start to the day.
 
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