What is your best comeback?

[D1llon]

*Said in the language, New Jersey*: "Hunny yah face looks like it was lit on fire and you coudn't find anything to put it out with." or "Hunny, yah face is so ugly it looks like yah were in two car accidents and a horse sh.it on it.". or "Hunny, yah face looks like you were pushed into a highway and no one was willin' to pull yah out."


gets em' every time

 

[Kyel]

"*censored.8.3*"

 

[Garrett x50 cal]

Usually;
You're a fat chubi *censored.4.0* face slut, go die in a hole you menopausel whore of a lesbian.

I feel dirty now.

lmfao.

umad? Yea u mad.

Or yo' cabbage is full o' mush ur muff cabbage!

 

[Psychonaut]

"uh... no?"

 

[muffun]

"k"

or I hit them with some witty rant, but it's usually the former.

 

[Psychonaut]

"uh... no?"

follow up:
"fart knocker"
and
"don't make me kick your ass, buttmunch"

<div class='spoiler_toggle'>oh god spoilers</div><div class="spoiler" style="display:none;">http://www.youtube.com/v/mV9zO2jba3o&autoplay=1</div>

 

[Ren Partycat]

I've got one to use against religious people.

"It's your God, those are YOUR Rules. YOU go to hell."

 

[TheYoshiGamer]

Just tell them how I feel (I am pathetic...).

 

[Micah]

My best comeback is saying nothing at all. Gets 'em every time.

 

[Lisathegreat!]

Lol, this girl I knew from my old school, Mia, made a good one.

Person: "Go to hell!"

Mia: "I already am."

I'm not good with comebacks.

 

[Brad]

Well what I like to do is like try to make sense out of something.

Person: SHUT UP!

Me: Now how exactly would I go about doing that? How can I shut up for I am not a door nor a window. Please inform me of what you mean.

 

[[Nook]]

Well what I like to do is like try to make sense out of something.

Person: SHUT UP!

Me: Now how exactly would I go about doing that? How can I shut up for I am not a door nor a window. Please inform me of what you mean.

I see.

The smartass method.

Doesn't work as good as "umad" when dealing with a noob, but at least effective on non-noobs.

Trust me.
I know this stuff.

But not to mention the highly effective against raging noob comeback method, the calm method.
A noob insults you with Caps Lock on and swear words.
"Okay.", I say.
They get pissy because I was calm, and their intention was to piss me off.
This is guaranteed to work against those ragers.

 

[OJ.]

"Get out of my face, noob!"

 

[The Sign Painter]

You're a bigger one.

 

[Josh]

"You're an idiot."
"I know."

Always leaves them silent and after a while embarresed.

 

[Colour Bandit]

Person: "You're weird!"
Me: "And finally he realises!"

 

[ACCFDude1]

I usually laugh to my self then leave the thread. I do not want to get in a argument with a person I do not know.

 

[Psychonaut]

You're a bigger one.

"uh... no?"

 

[Callie]

Well at least I can spell "read"! And then that leaves the person wanting to know, and then I tell them about how my friend accidentally spelled read, "reed" in his planner. But I only do that if it is one of our mutual close friends. If it isn't, I try to diss them based on the context, or try and make them confused, because that way it has appeared that I have won, even though I haven't.

 

[OmegaMan]

Well at least I can spell "read"! And then that leaves the person wanting to know, and then I tell them about how my friend accidentally spelled read, "reed" in his planner. But I only do that if it is one of our mutual close friends. If it isn't, I try to diss them based on the context, or try and make them confused, because that way it has appeared that I have won, even though I haven't.

Friend: "Hey! "

Me: "Get out of my face, before I snap your fingers off."