[NOVEL] COLLAPSE - By Marcus Stockley

[Stockley_]

Hey everyone, I've been recently making a short little novel called Collapse. It's my first try at writing (I'm only 16), and I was wondering if you guys could give me some feedback on it. I have the first two chapters done and posted on this site called Booksie. Here's the link:

http://www.booksie.com/literary_fiction/novel/marcusstockley/collapse/chapter/1

Thanks for your time, and enjoy!