Ghosting on a trade?

[jiojiop]

I really hope so! It's frustrating when you see people who have burned you with perfect feedback when your experience with them has been less than stellar. I honestly think that an update in the rules regarding negative feedback could be helpful for a lot of us traders on the forum so there's less speculation and confusion!

...idgi, why would there be the option to leave negative feedback if you aren't allowed to leave it for negative experiences??

I haven't left feedback on ghosters, I just get irritated and move on. But if you've gone to considerable trouble for them and a great deal of inconvenience to the point of wasting your entire day, um, yeah. Please warn me about them by leaving feedback.

Happened to me yesterday actually, but in their defense I was way too drunk to be trading last night. Re-reading the messages it's obnoxiously obvious, to the point that I can say confidently I would have ghosted a trader who responded to me in such a way. Nothing inappropriate, just obnoxious, but still.

Now I wanna know what it said lol. My imagination is running wild!

This happened to me a lot of times! i actively trade villagers in order to rack nmt to look or buy Raymond; sometimes i would invite villagers that i have no plan on keeping because someone said they would take the villager but after a few hours/days they would stop replying and im left with a villager in boxes that i spent a whole day cycling that i now have to let go for really cheap price just so that they wouldn't go into the void. It's really frustrating! Please don't do this. The least thing you can do when trying to back away from a trade is to help the seller find a new buyer.

3 magic words: payment up front.

Your traders will be far more serious about it if you do.

 

[LinDUNguin]

...idgi, why would there be the option to leave negative feedback if you aren't allowed to leave it for negative experiences??

I haven't left feedback on ghosters, I just get irritated and move on. But if you've gone to considerable trouble for them and a great deal of inconvenience to the point of wasting your entire day, um, yeah. Please warn me about them by leaving feedback.



Now I wanna know what it said lol. My imagination is running wild!



3 magic words: payment up front.

Your traders will be far more serious about it if you do.

Nothing super noteworthy honestly, it's just like reading a text where someone is obviously drunk & too lazy/giggly to correct/notice their mistakes:

Holy ****, you're amazing! I'll trade you 25k IGB for it sure, would you want a couple hybrids as well? Also no worries, I understand the mental and emotional toll college assignments can take on you, there is no rush whatsoever. if i'm honest i don't know what this was in response from and i am just happy to you.


i have primarily hybrid tulips, is that cool? what hybrids do you nmeed most?


i just realized this is later than you posted, are you still available to trade? if you see this tomorrow mornig i'm still available!!

 

[purple_vixen]

My sympathies go out to those of you who have been scammed. I was wondering about putting a time limit on free items that people have requested, but who then haven't answered PMs asking when they are happy to trade.

What I will say is, I wouldn't object to being given negative feedback if I left over 24 hours without claiming a villager in boxes who I had requested, but if it is an item (so not time critical), I would hope that you'd give me a little more time to respond. It might be illness, family issues, broken technology, and/or catching up with messages in the order that they were received. A couple of trades have taken a couple of days (overall) recently just because of differing time zones and people being called into work. I have a chronic pain condition, and I have been very grateful when people have forgiven me when I have been too sick to answer PMs for a day...

If I can see that people are checking in, I don't mind holding onto things for a few days, and I try to keep other people posted the same way - sometimes going so far as to say that I am browsing the forum in bed when I can't sleep, but I will PM them when I am in game and able to drop off their item.

 

[jiojiop]

Nothing super noteworthy honestly, it's just like reading a text where someone is obviously drunk & too lazy/giggly to correct/notice their mistakes:

Aw I'm sure they're just busy and will get back to you in a day or so with apologies.

If you can still spell "hybrids" and use the word "whatsoever" correctly in a sentence, you're clearly not drunk enough.

 

[RedTropicalPeachyFish]

EDIT: I just wanted to let everyone know that I traded with the person who I thought was ghosting me. Everything is all good now

That's good to know. Everyone has life, in there they may have things that they don't have control over. Just a couple days or a few days of disappearing shouldn't be a big deal imo..

 

[senbeiiscool]

That's good to know. Everyone has life, in there they may have things that they don't have control over. Just a couple days or a few days of disappearing shouldn't be a big deal imo..

We were able to talk it out in the end which was great, because they also saw this post and apologized a lot! It boiled down to our difference in communication styles which letting each other know in the end helped a lot in understanding why we took particular actions and how we can grow from now on

 

[solace]

Someone ghosted me when I was giving Reneigh away for FREE. The person claimed that it was their dreamie. Thought about leaving feedback as well, but it just seemed weird to do that on here. I've had a lot of weird exchanges regarding trades as of late. I stopped cycling because of this issue. I was doing it because I love finding dreamies and giveaways. I went HAM on the Sakura items to be disappointed by an underwhelming giveaway. Things have changed so I just make mental notes as to who threw me shade and did not respect my time because everything I do is for free.

 

[Lavulin98]

It happens! I am used to discord trades so you just gotta grow thick skin IMO. Always have backup offers and exchanging multiple messages with people who are willing to take the item/villiger off your hands.

I am mostly in fossil trade which is always about finding the best offers so I always assume people not responding either found better deal or already got the item. Same for villagers. There is always willing to pay what you want if you wait just a little longer.

I want to give credits for users who do trades spanning days. I could never do that since we are all international community with different timezones. In my opinion, you will be much less stressful if you go by who is available NOW, and if not. next person.

 

[Garrett]

Y'all are super patient. I'll give someone a couple of hours to get organised, then I move on. With all the different timezones, either someone is ready to trade now or they're not.

 

[idiotdoomspiral]

i dont think ive ever been ghosted before but as mentioned by the person above me time zones can be a pain and sometimes i have to wait a couple of hours when my gates are open, i think ive fallen asleep waiting for someone. i could imagine its a bit worse right now as the site has been thriving since release

 

[0ni]

I'm always extremely paranoid that I have inadvertently ghosted someone one here, I'm not the most organised person so things tend to get a bit muddled when I have more than like... two trades going on ..

I've been very lucky, though - the people I have come across in trades have been very kind and patient !

 

[Spooky.]

I've gotten ghosted recently offering something for free. I must have DMed 15+ people to give them a dodo code to get a DIY from a villager and a whole bunch of people never replied.

Their loss though because the DIY crafting doesn't last forever.

 

[Krissi2197]

Y'all are super patient. I'll give someone a couple of hours to get organised, then I move on. With all the different timezones, either someone is ready to trade now or they're not.

Usually if I'm trading with someone I DM them first to see if they're ready. I hate opening my gates without confirming they're ready and wasting an hour or more of my time just waiting for them to stop by.

 

[CovisGod]

As someone that has probably accidentally ghosted tons of people I just wanted to give an insight from my point of view...

Some of you might know me / have traded with me, I run a Cataloguing shop in Nooks Cranny, to date I have had over 750 people over to Catalogue furniture sets at my Island, and running something to that scale isn’t the easiest thing in the world, all it takes is for one person to take their time getting to your Island or fall asleep and others have then been waiting too long and go offline and it’s a snowball effect,

A couple of days ago I through no fault of my own had no internet for 14 hours and in that time I amassed 70 PMs regarding Cataloguing, I’m sure you’ll all appreciate that takes time to go through. I’m in the UK so I find myself up at 5am and going to sleep some time between 2am and 3am to keep up with demand, I then laugh to myself when I get a PM saying that I’m “ignoring” someone because one message has slipped through the net.

I love what I do and the whole shop side of it is what keeps the game fresh to me, especially during this time of actual no real work, but sometimes people need to realise that although at that time they’re entire focus is on messaging me, my focus is on a queue of sometimes 20 patiently waiting people, so if it takes me a little while to get to you or I skim over your message and I forgot to go back to it I do apologise, just give me a pleasant nudge a bit later on

 

[ThomasNLD]

You can always put a disclaimer in your thread that if the trade is delayed for to long, you can cancel the trade and pursue a deal with someone else. I can imagine its annoying. I guess especially when delays from the other person aren`t communicated properly. As long as thats the case its a lot easier to wait patiently.

 

[Annika.]

You never know what's going on, but if one person has problem they have to communicate them if possible. I once traded something and then had a temporary power outage. I could still message them from my phone and let them know I would come visit as soon as possible. Everything went smoothly and the trader was very understanding.

And even if the trader is not understanding, you still owe them an explanation so that they can move on and continue trading. Even if you're anxious, you can still send "I'm no longer interested in this trade, sorry for any inconvience." and be done with it.

 

[CovisGod]

Yeah I agree entirely, I sometimes wish people would say “look I want to do this trade but I’m not that fussed about doing it right now” because the worst thing is when I’ve sent the Dodo code with my disclaimer / rules, they don’t turn up or even say “On my way!” Or anything after 20 minutes so I move onto the next person then two turn up at once,

anyone that’s traded with me knows how incredibly set up my Cataloguing part of my island is, having more than one person over at a time can turn into anarchy,

I must say though on the whole 99.9% of trades I’ve done have been perfect and I’ve had some incredibly lovely people over

 

[spawnpoint]

Yes, someone bought Rosie from me then they straight up stopped responding and I never heard from them again. I ended up giving her away

 

[Mairen]

I don't think ghosting really applies to the people who are on a different time zone or accidentally fall asleep or just genuinely don't see the message. Ghosting is applying to people who are purposely and specifically choosing to ignore someone they were in the middle of a trade with, just because they changed their mind and don't have the courtesy to let the other person know.

 

[navleost]

I think this has happend to me a few times. And the reason is usually the same. It has to do with the fact that we all live in different time zones. Sometimes i will start a trade, they write me back when im offline. I see the message and write them back saying "write when you are online again and we will do the trade". They reply when im offline ect. Ect. And after a few Days of this i just give up, and find the items i want, Somewhere Else.

Since this is a forum and not an instant messaging chat, it can be tricky to catch People at the right times. And also Sometimes real life gets in the way, and you are not able to come online for a few Days.. :s it sucks but thats what happens.