Double Standard of Promiscuity

[Juicebox]

Wow I don't even think I have words for how much that pisses me off.

Okay so this is kind of a different topic here but in a roundabout way it works so...I'm going to bring it up anyway. Feminism.
I am a woman but that doesn't mean I'm feminist. Actually, I think the entirety of feminism is bull **** except for the part that women should be considered equal to men (in that they can make their own decisions/get paid the same for the same exact work).
I'm not outright saying its true, but I bet a lot of those posters were women and have high respects for women. If that is so and they see that men and women were created equally, than why are they saying that women are too weak to rape or don't have the capability to rape like a man?

Basically that would be hypocritical to the notion of feminism/equality for men and women. Why say that anything a man can do, a woman can do also....except when it comes to something bad? So I guess women aren't capable of murder either right? No, anyone can and if they are messed up enough, will be likely to do something like rape.

Spoiler: Mature readers please. If you are offended easily, please don't read.

Men can get turned on whether they want to or not. They are not the hounds that we make them out to be. Women too can get turned on whether they want to or not. It's called biology. When your body finds someone attractive or believes that it needs to prepare for sex, its going to get ready. You know how guys can spike a girls drink than have his way? Well guess what. Girls have that ability too. If you want to say that men are monsters like that you have to believe that women are too. Of course, not everyone is like that. You are a pretty ****ed up person to do this.

People tend to mistake feminism and straw feminism and I feel I should inform you that there is indeed a difference.

Feminism is exactly what you said. It's saying that women should not be outcasted, paid differently, treated differently, be forced to think differently, or be given different options just for being female. It is pretty much what you said. Real feminism is about being given the option to be a doctor, lawyer, or even a housewife. Likewise, men should be given the same rights as well. Feminism is also by extension, fighting for sexual liberation for women, since women are often taught to feel ashamed about their bodies from an early age.

I'd generally assume that you support those same ideals, however, you claim that you are not a feminist. That's because what has become the stereotype for feminism is what is known as the straw feminist, and it's pretty much a negative caricature of feminism.

A straw feminist hates men, and sees them as less than women. Straw feminism is founded by this idea that because women were repressed for so long, men should suffer the same punishment. They are often big, burly brutes who will do anything to justify their means, and are often sexually repressive and rude to women who don't think the same way that you do. They also generally fight against woman doing any kind of dainty things.

It sickens me that the straw feminist has taken over real feminism. It has made it harder to fight for equality, because once the word "feminist" is uttered, nobody will take you seriously. It is considered taboo to be a girl who fights for the equal rights of women because you automatically get lumped together with a bunch of ignorant slobs who don't know the first thing about fighting for equality. You simply can't be a strong, smart, pretty feminist. No, if you adding feminism to that description automatically turns you into an ignorant *****.The woman you described who says that men are too strong to be raped is the textbook definition of straw feminism and what it has done to the cause. Once again, feminists are forced to fight the negative caricature that has been forced upon them, just because one ignorant woman decided she couldn't keep her mouth shut.



I'm sorry for the mini rant, but this frustrates me to no end.

 

[jesughs]

Oh Hell no.

Slut shaming is a completely correct consequence for having premarital sex (especially in high school).

Disclaimer: I'm not sure on my opinion of premarital sex, but during middle/high school it should not be happening.

Life would be so much simpler if people weren't having free sex. STDs wouldn't be spread as fast, and the drama/duress of people having sex and intertwined feelings would be eradicated. Also treating sex as something sacred and the body as a temple makes sex with someone you love more special. If any of you had sex in high school, were your desires really that bad whee you couldn't control yourself?

Anyway, sluts devalue sex. Still, women do get blamed for having more than men, which I'm okay with because I hate promiscuity. Someone should be blamed for it.

But I'm also a feminist. I don't believe that men should put themselves superior to women and use them for simple pleasures such as sex. But if a woman is too stupid to recognize this for herself then she should be shut out. If there weren't seductive-basic woman out there, these men wouldn't exist in my opinion. Like great women- Sojourner Truth, Elizabeth Cady Stanton, Mary Wollenstonecraft- did not fight their inferiority for hundreds of years so women could go back to roles pleasing men.

But what if these women are enjoying having sex? Isn't empowering for women? Not at all. There is not a single expression of genius from such people. These women dedicate their time to their sugar daddies or pleasing the men around them instead of pleasing themselves and allowing them to create new pieces of art or ideas or machines. For real, what is genius about saying "I love my boyfriend so much, I'd die without him!" That is complete dependency.

And although this isn't the issue, your thesis is ****.

So you believe that people should be discriminated against due to their choices in life? Well...

First of all, if a girl in high school chooses to loose her virginity it is completely and utterly her choice (unless other circumstances stand). Is that affecting you in any way? No. Then why should you care? Maybe she has found that one, special person that she loves and has chosen to have that experience with them. Who are we to say that someone cannot be in love because of their age? Instead of allowing her to make her own choices for her own life, you advocate shaming her for her decisions because they do not comply with your standard of morals. That's ****, to me.

As for women being blamed for promiscuity instead of men, why the hell would you be OK with that?! You say you're a feminist, but that right there is not equal treatment of our genders! A man can have sex with 10 women in a month--he's called a player, maybe insulted by a few people. A woman can have sex with 10 men in a month--wow, what a whore! The slut bashing terms come flying in. And you're OK with that, simply because someone has to take the blame. Nobody has to take the blame. People who choose to live their lives fulfilling their sexual desires deserve to be able to live that life, as long as they are interfering with nobody else's lives.

I respect your right to have a different opinion, and your opinion itself. But I simply can't agree with it.

 

[Juicebox]

Oh Hell no.

Slut shaming is a completely correct consequence for having premarital sex (especially in high school).

Disclaimer: I'm not sure on my opinion of premarital sex, but during middle/high school it should not be happening.

Life would be so much simpler if people weren't having free sex. STDs wouldn't be spread as fast, and the drama/duress of people having sex and intertwined feelings would be eradicated. Also treating sex as something sacred and the body as a temple makes sex with someone you love more special. If any of you had sex in high school, were your desires really that bad whee you couldn't control yourself?

Anyway, sluts devalue sex. Still, women do get blamed for having more than men, which I'm okay with because I hate promiscuity. Someone should be blamed for it.

But I'm also a feminist. I don't believe that men should put themselves superior to women and use them for simple pleasures such as sex. But if a woman is too stupid to recognize this for herself then she should be shut out. If there weren't seductive-basic woman out there, these men wouldn't exist in my opinion. Like great women- Sojourner Truth, Elizabeth Cady Stanton, Mary Wollenstonecraft- did not fight their inferiority for hundreds of years so women could go back to roles pleasing men.

But what if these women are enjoying having sex? Isn't empowering for women? Not at all. There is not a single expression of genius from such people. These women dedicate their time to their sugar daddies or pleasing the men around them instead of pleasing themselves and allowing them to create new pieces of art or ideas or machines. For real, what is genius about saying "I love my boyfriend so much, I'd die without him!" That is complete dependency.

And although this isn't the issue, your thesis is ****.

I have a friend who likes sex. She would be considered a slut by most people's standards, however I don't agree that she's devaluing herself at all. She is always the one who chooses to have sex. She plays the role of the man in a way, because she is the one having the one night stands, and she chooses not to call them.

Now you've made it apparent that you don't approve of promiscuous activity, and I can respect that. However, I can't respect you blaming women above men, or simply boiling any promiscuous woman down to some zombie owned by men, when this is clearly not the case.

 

[D1llon]

So you believe that people should be discriminated against due to their choices in life? Well...

First of all, if a girl in high school chooses to loose her virginity it is completely and utterly her choice (unless other circumstances stand). Is that affecting you in any way? No. Then why should you care?

I stated in my post why I care. Promiscuous sex leads to the spread of STDs, can cause unwanted pregnancy, and devalues marriage. This is like what Aldous Huxley was saying with his novel Brave New World; characters had absolutely no religious education or moral education, and sex was common. There was no marriage in his novel, nor were there any mothers or fathers or families. That is the extreme of allowing promiscuity to occur.

Maybe she has found that one, special person that she loves and has chosen to have that experience with them. Who are we to say that someone cannot be in love because of their age?

I didn't necessarily say it, William Shakespeare did with Romeo and Juliet. It wasn't a love story. They both ended up dead based on impulsive behavior with little thought. True love in high school is practically a myth; it shouldn't be promoted.

As for women being blamed for promiscuity instead of men, why the hell would you be OK with that?!

I'm sorry I really should have elaborated on this. A woman should be criticized for having sex, and I'm okay with that. BUT I also am okay when anyone shames a guy for having sex too. Like I would never forbid a pregnant girl from entering an Honors Society because she was pregnant, that's too much of a double standard as a guy could freely have sex and have no proof of it and still be inducted. And overall, yes I am a feminist, I just don't like sluts who objectify themselves.

 

[Kaiaa]

People tend to mistake feminism and straw feminism and I feel I should inform you that there is indeed a difference.

Feminism is exactly what you said. It's saying that women should not be outcasted, paid differently, treated differently, be forced to think differently, or be given different options just for being female. It is pretty much what you said. Real feminism is about being given the option to be a doctor, lawyer, or even a housewife. Likewise, men should be given the same rights as well. Feminism is also by extension, fighting for sexual liberation for women, since women are often taught to feel ashamed about their bodies from an early age.

I'd generally assume that you support those same ideals, however, you claim that you are not a feminist. That's because what has become the stereotype for feminism is what is known as the straw feminist, and it's pretty much a negative caricature of feminism.

A straw feminist hates men, and sees them as less than women. Straw feminism is founded by this idea that because women were repressed for so long, men should suffer the same punishment. They are often big, burly brutes who will do anything to justify their means, and are often sexually repressive and rude to women who don't think the same way that you do. They also generally fight against woman doing any kind of dainty things.

It sickens me that the straw feminist has taken over real feminism. It has made it harder to fight for equality, because once the word "feminist" is uttered, nobody will take you seriously. It is considered taboo to be a girl who fights for the equal rights of women because you automatically get lumped together with a bunch of ignorant slobs who don't know the first thing about fighting for equality. You simply can't be a strong, smart, pretty feminist. No, if you adding feminism to that description automatically turns you into an ignorant *****.The woman you described who says that men are too strong to be raped is the textbook definition of straw feminism and what it has done to the cause. Once again, feminists are forced to fight the negative caricature that has been forced upon them, just because one ignorant woman decided she couldn't keep her mouth shut.



I'm sorry for the mini rant, but this frustrates me to no end.

I do apologize if I have offended you but like you said, its unfortunate that "straw feminism" has taken over "real feminism". I have never met a real feminist. Literally anyone I've met who considers themselves feminist has been stuck up and "down with men" if you know what I mean. I come from a very small town so I know I still have a lot to learn. I know things aren't so black and white but when you grow up that way it's hard to change opinions.

 

[Juicebox]

I do apologize if I have offended you but like you said, its unfortunate that "straw feminism" has taken over "real feminism". I have never met a real feminist. Literally anyone I've met who considers themselves feminist has been stuck up and "down with men" if you know what I mean. I come from a very small town so I know I still have a lot to learn. I know things aren't so black and white but when you grow up that way it's hard to change opinions.

I understand as well, since I was in the same boat as you. I've grown up in a small town all my life and I was initially afraid of calling myself a feminist as well since it had such negative connotations. If my post sounded too angry, I apologize. I just want to dispel the myth about feminism so badly that I sometimes get a little carried away, because I feel that it's important to tell women not to be afraid to say that they want to be equal. I think that by educating people on the true meaning of feminism, real feminism will gain strength again.

 

[oath2order]

I stated in my post why I care. Promiscuous sex leads to the spread of STDs, can cause unwanted pregnancy, and devalues marriage.

It only leads to the spread of STDs and unwanted pregnancies if you aren't safe about it. Devaluing marriage? Yeah right. You know what devalues marriage? Divorce.

This is like what Aldous Huxley was saying with his novel Brave New World; characters had absolutely no religious education or moral education, and sex was common. There was no marriage in his novel, nor were there any mothers or fathers or families. That is the extreme of allowing promiscuity to occur.

Yeah, and you seem to be falling right into this extreme. You're equating morals with religion, and I'm sorry, but that's wrong. You can have religion, but no morals, and you can have morals but no religion.

On the feminist note. I thought the real feminism that you are, Juicebox, had switched places with straw feminism and that straw had become the majority. Didn't the entire straw feminism thing start with Valerie Solanas, the one who said that men were a biological mistake? Honestly speaking, the majority of feminists I have interacted with, and those are the only ones I am speaking of at this moment, fall into the straw feminist group. Basically, the ones who want to control women's lives by saying they're "free".

 

[Princess]

A lot of people have a misunderstanding of what true feminism is...
If you believe women should have just as many rights as men, you're a feminist. Simple as that.

EDIT: It's pretty unfair to "shame" someone for enjoying something completely legal just because of their gender.

 

[Jake]

A lot of people have a misunderstanding of what true feminism is...
If you believe women should have just as many rights as men, you're a feminist. Simple as that.

EDIT: It's pretty unfair to "shame" someone for enjoying something completely legal just because of their gender.

preach dis sista

I am a feminist but i think women should have more rights than men #oops

 

[Prof Gallows]

I agree with Oath's responses in regard to everything D1llon said.

Instead of throwing blame and discriminating there should be more encouragement to be safe. The only thing shaming someone is going to do is make them feel bad. It's not going to make them stop, and chances are having someone do that is just going to make them want to do it even more.

If you were to push using protection in a positive way, eventually it's going to catch on better. The negativity and the hate are what fuels all of the problems.

 

[D1llon]

Safe sex is something that is present in an "ideal world," which is not what we hold today. My high school is considered a "good" school and the people that I know who have sex have STDs, unnecessary drama which they revolve their lives around, and slack off with any task presented to them.

I know a guy who everyone looks to as being moral and being smart. He gets into relationships that last significantly longer than most relationships in high school, and he and his girlfriends are happy during the relationship. But eventually he ends it. And his ex-girl throws out the "I'm pregnant, you can't break up with me," "I love you so much, I'll die without you," and my favorite line from his ex to another friend, "Me and him are still sleeping together, I don't know why he is dating someone else."

IMO religion comes with morals. Morals relating to sex and drugs and respecting others of course. But I have to acknowledge that plenty of religions, even my own, hold beliefs that are anti-egalitarian; but that is not the issue this thread is about.

And free love does devalue marriage. So does divorce, but I never said it didn't. Divorce is kind of like free love in a way.

 

[Officer Berri]

You really shouldn't say things that make it look like everyone who has sex before getting married will automatically get STDs. You can get married and still get an STD. Heck, you can be born with STDs. And saying 'well that's the mom's fault for having sex' is a complete farce of an argument because you can't say she didn't get an STD from being raped or from having consensual sex with her husband. You don't know the source of the disease, so it's best you don't automatically go "Well they must be a slut then!"

Religion may come with morals but in no way is religion required for a person to have morals. I never had any religion growing up (in fact, all reference to religion terrified me because of how nasty people I met who followed a religion acted), and I'm one hundred percent confident that my morals are a lot better than a lot of the 'religious' students who went to my school. One of which told me to convert to her religion or burn in hell. At least I never cheated on my boyfriend like she did with hers. She may not have had sex but she still cheated on him with 3 different guys.

Also, 'free love' as you call it does not devalue marriage. All marriage is is a legal brand tying a man and a woman together so in the eyes of the law they can hold the rights all married couples can have. A wedding ceremony may have religious connotations, but being married is a legal status. You can be married without having a big wedding in a church somewhere, but you still have to register your marriage to legally be counted as being married whether you have that big wedding or not.

 

[oath2order]

And free love does devalue marriage. So does divorce, but I never said it didn't. Divorce is kind of like free love in a way.

You still haven't said HOW it devalues marriage.

 

[Prof Gallows]

Safe sex is something that is present in an "ideal world," which is not what we hold today. My high school is considered a "good" school and the people that I know who have sex have STDs, unnecessary drama which they revolve their lives around, and slack off with any task presented to them.

That's categorizing, and a pretty immature look at it honestly.

Also, regarding the "ideal world" bull, it doesn't matter what we hold today. The fact is you push for what we might hold tomorrow. I'll give you the fact that you're obligated to your own opinion, but it's really single minded.

 

[Colour Bandit]

I've been called a slut and a whore before but only because another girl had attempted to ask my boyfriend out before we had started dating and he turned her down, basically she was pissed off with him and most likely jealous of me (I don't know who this girl is, my boyfriend won't tell me who she is...) and then rumours spread within the first month of us going out that I had 'banged' him, that I gave him a BJ and even one that I was pregnant (And I sure as hell wasn't). Even a few of my friends wouldn't believe me when I said none of that happened! So I find it unfair that people label each other in this way when they haven't really done anything to deserve it.

I try to avoid slut shaming and anything like that as I might not really know the person I'm labelling, e.g. two years ago a girl in the year above me got pregnant, she got called a slut and other derogatory terms and no-one believed that she had been raped, she left the school after a few months (She was pro-life so she chose to keep the child I think...) I had unfortunately labelled her as a slut in my mind, so when I found out what happened to her I felt very guilty.

EDIT:

Safe sex is something that is present in an "ideal world," which is not what we hold today. My high school is considered a "good" school and the people that I know who have sex have STDs, unnecessary drama which they revolve their lives around, and slack off with any task presented to them.

So all the free condoms that are given out in the UK don't exist? Or the Pill that most women (Including myself) take everyday?
Or maybe schools are wasting money with sex ED classes? Well if none of these exist how come I, like many others, are not teen parents?
Think about it, contraceptives are still sold today so people must be using them.

 

[Bambi]

I just hate judgement of any kind. If a woman wants to wear a mini skirt and tube top and run around without underwear, who am I to judge??? If she wants to sleep with 100 guys a night, is it really my buisness? no.

I don't understand another statement people make "oh I don't have a problem with ho's, just when they start sleeping with peoples boyfriends"..... Maybe instead of always blaming the women take a good long look at your boyfriend who is cheating on you and think if he is really worth it. Would I want a beautiful skimpy clothed woman around my boyfriend? Why not? I trust him.

Judgement of any kind stems from insecurities. Women are SO terrible for judging other women. We say we fight for equal rights as men yet we all bash on each other and call each other down. I was bullied all through high school because of other women and honestly any of my women friends I have now have admitted that they didn't like me when they first met me because I was either "slutty" or "snobby" or some sort of pre-judgemental insult.

The thing is WE ALL DO IT. If you say you haven't pre-judged someone, your lying. The best thing we can all do is work our hardest to NOT do it. You would be amazed with what is underneath people when you care to find out.

 

[Princess]

I don't understand another statement people make "oh I don't have a problem with ho's, just when they start sleeping with peoples boyfriends"..... Maybe instead of always blaming the women take a good long look at your boyfriend who is cheating on you and think if he is really worth it.

I agree with this 27271861961069100%

 

[Jake]

Safe sex is something that is present in an "ideal world," which is not what we hold today. My high school is considered a "good" school and the people that I know who have sex have STDs, unnecessary drama which they revolve their lives around, and slack off with any task presented to them.

Sometimes I say I have herpes and hemorrhoids to get out of school work

I just hate judgement of any kind. If a woman wants to wear a mini skirt and tube top and run around without underwear, who am I to judge??? If she wants to sleep with 100 guys a night, is it really my buisness? no.

I don't understand another statement people make "oh I don't have a problem with ho's, just when they start sleeping with peoples boyfriends"..... Maybe instead of always blaming the women take a good long look at your boyfriend who is cheating on you and think if he is really worth it. Would I want a beautiful skimpy clothed woman around my boyfriend? Why not? I trust him.

Judgement of any kind stems from insecurities. Women are SO terrible for judging other women. We say we fight for equal rights as men yet we all bash on each other and call each other down. I was bullied all through high school because of other women and honestly any of my women friends I have now have admitted that they didn't like me when they first met me because I was either "slutty" or "snobby" or some sort of pre-judgemental insult.

The thing is WE ALL DO IT. If you say you haven't pre-judged someone, your lying. The best thing we can all do is work our hardest to NOT do it. You would be amazed with what is underneath people when you care to find out.

This post pretty much sums everything up IMO.

You would be amazed with what is underneath people when you care to find out.

Ya. I used to judge everyone like I'd be like 'you smoke you're a ******' 'you're ugly I hate you' blah blah blerghh.
Anyway, back in January I was getting on the train to see Les Mis and then this girl started waving at me on the train, and from a distance it looked like my friends sister so I got on that carriage and it was a bunch of like 12/13 year old dicks who smoke and all that ****. and my first response was to hate them and I was like '**** what have I gotten myself into' but they started talking to me and they were just like normal people, except that they were like 12/13 and smoked. Even though I didn't agree with it once I looked past the fact they smoked they were actually some pretty cool kids and I had a really nice chat to them and they were just so nice, they had a good sense of humour, they were just like normal regular people.
So ever since that experience I try my hardest not to judge people but I still do.
On top of that, I'm an honest person, and all my close friends I hated a few years ago. Much like you, I've told every single one of them I hated them all when I was 13 and I thought they were ****ed up. But again. I didn't know them and now that I do they're some pretty cool people.

 

[jesughs]

I know I'm late but I read something about religion relating to morals and I just

This argument pisses me off more than the one that I wrote this thread about in the first place.
I myself do not identify as a religious person (call me an Atheist I guess idk I'm figuring stuff out still, I prefer nonreligious), however I am very accepting of other religions and am always very open to learning about them--a good moral to have if you ask me. This is more than I can say for many of the self proclaimed "good Christian men/women" that I know. I am not saying all Christians are like this. As I said, I am open minded and accepting, this is from my experiences with a few of these types of people who happened to be Christians. My own mother has stated to me that she would feel uncomfortable if she were on a plane with a Muslim or in a room predominantly filled with Muslims. She says they make her feel uneasy because of "what they do". Needless to say I flew off on her and we got into a pretty heated argument, but that's besides the point. If I'm not mistaken, the Bible teaches acceptance and love, correct? Then why do people like my mom, Christians like my mom, hate the Islamic culture? It's ridiculous. Take a look at the Westboro Baptist Church. Very religious group of people. And what do they do? They picket soldiers funerals. Soldiers who have given their lives so that Americans can live in peace (well, that's for another debate, heh). Sound like society's standard of morals to you? The list could go on and on. Oh, but don't get me wrong. There's plenty of nonreligious people who lack in morals as well. I'm trying to say you cannot categorize people by something like religion and decide whether or not they have morals. That's almost like saying Republicans/Democrats don't have morals... While I agree religion does teach morals, you don't have to be religious to have morals.

Safe sex is something that is present in an "ideal world," which is not what we hold today. My high school is considered a "good" school and the people that I know who have sex have STDs, unnecessary drama which they revolve their lives around, and slack off with any task presented to them.

OK, I'm back on topic now. Safe sex is something that I would like to see exist in our society today, yes. However, once again, it is not my choice if people choose to have sex with using proper protection. It's my choice to make sure that I myself do, I can't control others like that. I'm sorry that you've had bad experiences with your peers whom have had sex, however that stereotype that exists in your school doesn't exist in every teenager who has had sex. Like I was talking about early, I've had a couple of bad experiences with Christians whom aren't as moral conscientious as they've claimed to be, yet I am big enough to realize that that is not true for all Christians. Premarital sex does not go hand in hand with STDs (necessarily; some people do use protection...) or a dramatic and/or slacker attitude. Some people are mature about it, others like the people at your school are not.

And free love does devalue marriage.

HOW?! Maybe it devalues the inviolability of marriage, sure. But if two individuals who are engaged in a relationship each make a free choice to participate in multiple relations, what's the big deal? Like I and others have said, if it doesn't affect you directly, why would it bother you so much? All you have to do is not live your life like that if you don't like it...

I don't understand another statement people make "oh I don't have a problem with ho's, just when they start sleeping with peoples boyfriends"..... Maybe instead of always blaming the women take a good long look at your boyfriend who is cheating on you and think if he is really worth it. Would I want a beautiful skimpy clothed woman around my boyfriend? Why not? I trust him.

Judgement of any kind stems from insecurities. Women are SO terrible for judging other women. We say we fight for equal rights as men yet we all bash on each other and call each other down. I was bullied all through high school because of other women and honestly any of my women friends I have now have admitted that they didn't like me when they first met me because I was either "slutty" or "snobby" or some sort of pre-judgemental insult.

LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, I PRESENT THE BEST POST OF THE YEAR!

I've been called a slut and a whore before but only because another girl had attempted to ask my boyfriend out before we had started dating and he turned her down, basically she was pissed off with him and most likely jealous of me (I don't know who this girl is, my boyfriend won't tell me who she is...) and then rumours spread within the first month of us going out that I had 'banged' him, that I gave him a BJ and even one that I was pregnant (And I sure as hell wasn't). Even a few of my friends wouldn't believe me when I said none of that happened! So I find it unfair that people label each other in this way when they haven't really done anything to deserve it.

I try to avoid slut shaming and anything like that as I might not really know the person I'm labelling, e.g. two years ago a girl in the year above me got pregnant, she got called a slut and other derogatory terms and no-one believed that she had been raped, she left the school after a few months (She was pro-life so she chose to keep the child I think...) I had unfortunately labelled her as a slut in my mind, so when I found out what happened to her I felt very guilty.

Wow, I'm very sorry that you've been judged like that. It's very hurtful to be accused of things that clearly aren't true, such as what you had to go through. I've also been called stupid named like "slut" and "whore" and I wasn't even in a relationship (or doing any promiscuous things) at the time! It's frustrating, but I got over it and I see you did too. It's a good thing that it has opened your eyes about labeling other people. I think we've all been guilty of labeling people as "*****es", "d-bags", "whores", "sluts", etc. etc. (lol those words'll probably get censored oops oh well) but a lot of us, like you, have overcome judging others.

 

[Bacon Boy]

You know, as human beings, with morals (especially as a Christian, a good one), while we shouldn't tell others how to live, we shouldn't let them live a destructive lifestyle. Us letting them destroy themselves is just as bad as us helping them destroy themselves. What a lot of people seem to be advocating here is a very selfish and very isolationist lifestyle. I don't know about you guys, but I believe that we're all here to help each other on this hard road we all walk call life. If we see someone stumble or fall, we should try to help. Maybe it's just me. I just believe that it is our job, not just Christians, but humans in general, should help each other out. If I see a friend of mine throwing away their life drinking, I'm not going to stand by idly saying "it doesn't affect me, so I shouldn't intervene". They're not bad people for what they do, but I'm not going to stand by and let them destroy themselves. Saying "it doesn't affect me, so I shouldn't intervene" is a selfish and lazy philosophy. If I were to follow that philosophy, then since my best friend cutting herself doesn't really affect me, so I shouldn't intervene. It's her life and I shouldn't try to tell her how to live. That's an idiotic philosophy, in my opinion. Just because it doesn't affect you, doesn't mean you should be apathetic towards it. While, yes, it is their life, I don't believe that we should not let them destroy it. This is my opinion, but it bothers me when I hear people say stuff like that.