Giveaway done

[dedenne]

ive been using the forums less and less so y not giveaway tbt yeet i only use it for art so yeah u probs have more use for it like collectibles or smth.
to enter just comment a crappy joke that will make me die inside. this closes on the 20th cos thats when i finish school lol. winner will be chosen using a random thing

tl;dr just say a terrible joke

good luck

 

[chet_manley]

Why did the jelly roll?

Because it saw the apple turnover.

 

[moo_nieu]

Crappy joke, you say?
Why did the whale cross the wave?

Spoiler: suspense

To get to the other tide!

 

[MapleSilver]

Prepare to see emotion in motion! You shall now see sleepiness in the very air!

...
...
...
...Now who's sleepy?
...You or me?

Yawn. Time for my nap.

 

[chet_manley]

 

[Stackhouse]

A man and his dog, Rover, have been lost in the bush for almost two weeks, without food.

As it enters the end of the second week, the man notices Rover getting thinner.

He says "If I don't do this now, there will be nothing left of him to eat".

So, as much as it pains the starving man, he kills and eats his dog.

He picks the last bit of meat from the bone, and lays it down with the others.

He looks at the pile of bones and smiles.

"Geez... Rover would have loved those bones if he was still here."

 

[doggaroo]

Eating breakfast on January 1st
Oh man, I'm starved! I haven't eaten all year!

 

[moo_nieu]

Eating breakfast on January 1st
Oh man, I'm starved! I haven't eaten all year!

This thread is the greatest thread

 

[Valzed]

What does a vegan zombie eat?

Graaaaaaaaaains!

 

[Bcat]

Mahatma Gandhi walked barefoot most of the time, which produced an impressive set of calluses on his feet. He also ate very little, which made him rather frail and because of his odd diet, he suffered from bad breath.

So you could say he was a super calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.

 

[neoratz]

a man has been lost in the desert for weeks, he's sweaty and nasty and tired. luckily, he comes across a church with a stable! he heads into the church and he says to the minister "sir, i've been lost in the desert for so long, could i borrow a horse to quickly bring myself to the nearest city?" the minister says "sure, but these horses have some pretty weird commands. to make the horse go you say THANK GOD! and to make the horse stop you say AMEN." the man says "okay!" and he goes out with the horse.

the man says thank god and the horse goes fast. the man says thank god and the horse goes faster. the man says thank god, thank god, thank god, and the horse goes faster, and faster, and faster! .....but suddenly he spots a cliff ahead. he tries to remember the command to make the horse stop. "stop! slow down! cease!"

then he remembers! "AMEN!" and the horse comes to a halt, right at the edge of the cliff.
the man lets out a sigh, wipes the sweat off his brow, and he says

"thank god....."

 

[MatchaMoonlight]

Why can't you trust trees?

Because they are shady.

 

[spookbunny]

What did the buffalo say to his son when he left for college?

Bison.







...i'm not sorry.

 

[Goldenapple]

A piece of string walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender looks at him and says, "We don't serve string here." So the string goes outside, twists himself up a bit, kind of roughs up his ends and walks back into the bar and orders a drink. The bartender looks at him and says, "Aren't you that little piece of string that was in here a few minutes ago?"


The string says, "No sir, I'm a frayed knot."

 

[Radda]

What is Beethoven doing right now?

Decomposing.

 

[Stackhouse]

What did the buffalo say to his son when he left for college?

Bison.







...i'm not sorry.

LMAO!

That's hilarious!

 

[duckykate]

DID YOU HEAR WHAT HAPPENED TO THE ITALIAN CHEF

HE PASTA WAY

EKSS DEEEEEEE

 

[xSuperMario64x]

My life is a terrible joke
Lmao jk


What did Waluigi say at the party?

I'm having a WAHnderful timeee




Yep that's all I got for now

 

[Midoriya]

Pokemon MC blacked out!

Pokemon trainer: “Hey guys, guess what? I just beat this trainer and he blacked out! Well, guess it’s time to rob him!”

Pokemon trainer 2: “How does that make any sense? Robbing someone after just defeating their Pokemon? That makes us no better than the evil team guys!”

Pokemon trainer: “Evil team, evil dream! Who cares. Just help me rob him!”

Pokemon trainer 2: “Alright, fine...”

Pokemon trainer: “And let’s put a sign that says kick me on his butt too!”

Pokemon trainer 2: “Hehe, this is actually kind of funny.”

Pokemon MC wakes up with a sign that says “kick me” on his butt, drawings on his face, and out of all possessions and money

Hau walks by and laughs at the Pokemon MC

Hau: “Haha, looking great!”

Your trainer got inevitably mad! Your trainer used kick-to-Hau’s-shin! Hau fainted and coughed up three max revives!




And now for some Hau jokes.


“Hey, Hau are you doing?”

“Not much, Hau are you?”

“I’m doing terribly!”

“Hau so?”

“I don’t think I know Hau to do this problem! It’s too difficult!”

“Well, let me help you with it. I’ll teach you Hau to do these problems, so that you know Hau for the future. After all, how else would we know Hau to learn from our past mistakes?”

 

[deuces]

your balance is 50 million bells! just kidding! it's actually 0.
phyllis has jokes for days. god i hate and love her