Being 17

michealsmells

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More specifically, being 17 when you're nearing your birthday.

This age feels like I'm trapped in limbo, and this year isn't making it much better. I'm still a minor and 100% rely on my parents, and don't have much choice. I'm just lucky they're as supportive as they are. That being said, even when I do become an adult, it's not like I'm gonna magically move out, have a career, etc.

That being said, not being 18 limits me on SO many things. I automatically am way less likely to be able to get a job even if I was looking (im focusing on school for the time being). I keep trying to go to certain pages (like the profile of an artist or to do that survey for NH that was posted a bit ago from the University of Missouri I believe) only to get blocked off because im not old enough. Im both treated like an adult and not at the same time and I dont get it!! I know i won't change much when I become 18 but I'll be looked at so much differently by the world. Or is that just my 17 year old brain expecting it? I feel like I know so much but so little at the same time.

My birthday is the end of November. I've almost always been the youngest of all my peers, and I still feel so little. I know this is ranty, but at the end of the day I just want to know if people feel the same way. Or if they have in the past- that being 17 is just like being in a weird child-adult limbo. Is it gonna stay like this when I become a full-fledged adult, cause I've been told your 20s are like your teens only you have more responsibility and need to pay taxes.
 
Honestly, I’m 17 and am grateful that I’m still young. I already deal with a lot of stress and becoming an adult will only make that worse. Reaching my 20s will suck because I’ll become fat, have trouble getting a job and being good at it, and there’ll overall be a lot more pressure.
 
More specifically, being 17 when you're nearing your birthday.

This age feels like I'm trapped in limbo, and this year isn't making it much better. I'm still a minor and 100% rely on my parents, and don't have much choice. I'm just lucky they're as supportive as they are. That being said, even when I do become an adult, it's not like I'm gonna magically move out, have a career, etc.

That being said, not being 18 limits me on SO many things. I automatically am way less likely to be able to get a job even if I was looking (im focusing on school for the time being). I keep trying to go to certain pages (like the profile of an artist or to do that survey for NH that was posted a bit ago from the University of Missouri I believe) only to get blocked off because im not old enough. Im both treated like an adult and not at the same time and I dont get it!! I know i won't change much when I become 18 but I'll be looked at so much differently by the world. Or is that just my 17 year old brain expecting it? I feel like I know so much but so little at the same time.

My birthday is the end of November. I've almost always been the youngest of all my peers, and I still feel so little. I know this is ranty, but at the end of the day I just want to know if people feel the same way. Or if they have in the past- that being 17 is just like being in a weird child-adult limbo. Is it gonna stay like this when I become a full-fledged adult, cause I've been told your 20s are like your teens only you have more responsibility and need to pay taxes.

I'm turning 25 this coming December and supposedly at the midpoint of my life yet I don't feel like an adult. It makes me question what does it mean to be an adult? I've come to realize that the label of children, teenagers, young adults, adults, and the elderly are merely labeling for what age group you are in at the moment, it does not reflect your mental capabilities. Being 17, you are considered a minor in some countries and not in others. Some countries consider you an adult after you have turned 21.

We all grow up at our own pace based on many factors ranging from financial status, social status, past experiences, etc. The correct terminology would be an amateur and an expert. Before we try or know something, we are considered amateurs but once you have acquired experience and knowledge, you edge closer towards being an expert. You will get more and more responsibilities as you progress through life and through trial-and-error, you'll get more and more experiences and knowledge.

What's important is to have an open mind, be willing to learn and adapt, and a little bit of luck and faith, you'll be fine. Trust me at 25, I am still learning and I think that is just part of life :)
 
To me personally, how you’re treated is based more on how you look. I’m 26 but I look like I’m in my early 20s and therefore get treated as such which has its positives and negatives.

I know it’s cliché but don’t rush your youth away. I wish I still had more time to live at home and have more free time to write, watch shows, binge video games. Living on your own is fun in the sense that you can do whatever you want but at the same time, you have responsibilities that eat away at your free time so in reality you have a schedule to follow still and there isn’t as much freedom as one imagined, or at least as much as I imagined.

I didn’t feel the difference between 17 and 18 personally, besides being able to vote and buy lottery tickets which wasn’t a life changing event for me.

I totally get what you mean though, you want to be treated like an adult but can’t because you’re still technically a kid. I’d say enjoy it because you’re almost done the whole kid thing and won’t be able to live through that again. You’ll be an adult soon enough.
 
17 was one of my least favourite years. My mom was super overcontrolling and treated me like a kid when all my peers had so much more freedom. Things started to change not the second I turned 18, because that was "just a number" according to her, but when I got my first job (which was when I was 18 and a half). She couldn't prevent me from leaving the house or using the internet "too much" if I had to do so for work! So while turning 18 doesn't necessarily make everyone see you differently, it does open up more opportunities.
 
it's been a few years since I was 17 but I remember it well. I was 17 throughout my entire Senior year of HS, and at the time I didn't have a license (I actually didn't get my drivers license until about a month ago) so I still relied on my parents to do basically everything for me. I think at that point in my life I was just ready for high school to be over cause I hated how restrictive being in school was. when I finally turned 18 it honestly didn't feel like much had changed, and I can't say that my life had really started to change at all (in terms of dependence and "feeling" a certain age) until about a year ago.

the late teens really are stagnant years, because you're ready to go out and face the world but there are still a few more things you need to do, like graduating HS, getting a job, moving out on your own, getting your own car, etc. but once that stuff starts to be taken care of you really begin to feel the freedom that you may have expected in your youth. as a kid I was incessantly controller by a helicopter mom who, honestly, only wanted the best for me. in the process she almost entirely stripped any feeling of freedom I wish I had at the time. now it's taken a few years, but through my own will and force I've begun to "wean" my mom off of being overly protective of me. parents need to understand that, at some point, children have to go and make lives of their own.

I'm currently in my senior year of college, just turned 21 a few months ago, and only now am I truly beginning to feel respected as an adult. people can no longer use the excuse that "[I'm] a minor" because I'm not anymore. it really sucks that age can put such a ridiculous restriction on someone, but unfortunately these years of life just seem to stand still for a bit, only beginning to take off in the early years of your 20s. I think, essentially, you have to "brute force" your way into being respected as an adult. you really have to try hard and convince people that, even if you're slightly underage, you can be trusted to do something.


basically right now it may seem like you're in a slump just because of your age, but soon enough you'll be in your 20s and there will be many opportunities for you to go where you want to go in life. I would say "enjoy it while you can" but tbh I personally didn't start to feel "alive" until I became more independent. my childhood were not the best years of my life. the best years are yet to come!
 
Hey I’m so happy I’m not 17 anymore. I was depressed and lonely and struggling with sucidal thoughts and panic attacks. I understand that excat feeling of feeling trapped in the age range, everyone wants you to be a adult but your still a minor so you can’t really be a adult , don’t know how to explain it. I’m 19 now, having my first child paying my own bills etc it gets better keep your head up ok??
 
Nothing magically changes overnight when you go from 17 to 18 other than new opportunities. You‘re still the same person and still have the same experiences and everything, the only thing that has really changed is more time has passed. I’m 23 years old now having graduated from university/college and having a job, yet I still feel like I’m 14 sometimes. The two most important things to me in life are to have a growth mindset, meaning I’m always looking to learn and improve my skills and knowledge, and to never stop having fun with things. The second you tell yourself you can’t have fun anymore is the second your life becomes mundane and a chore. Yes, adults have more responsibilities to take care of, taxes to pay, etc, but that doesn’t mean we can’t have fun too! You just have to know when it’s time to be casual and when you need to act serious and mature about things.
 
ages are arbitrary, maturity levels are not

being in your 20s is absolutely nothing like ages 16-18 lol

your parents are always going to view you as their kid. not necessarily a bad thing. but if you want them to treat/view you more as an "Adult" then that's where the maturity thing comes in, i.e. acceptance of responsibility, self-sufficiency, self-motivation

if you don't want to get a job yet, find a way to get involved in something in your community. like animals? volunteer at a pet shelter. want to help people that are less fortunate? food bank. you could also do student organizations etc. obviously depending on your location these sorts of things might be limited currently but i know a lot of volunteer opportunities are still available here.

these sorts of experiences help you get out of your head. and it shows that you have initiative. plus if you won't have work experience, it'll look good on a resume

just be sure you have some sort of idea how to secure a job in the near-ish future, bc if you think it's hard to find a job if you're under 18 it's ironically even worse if you're 19+ and have a blank resume. knowing someone that can get you hired is usually all you need so just talk to family members/friends and try to line something up
 
Tbh I'm 18 rn and not much has really changed from being 17. I'm an "adult" now but I'm still finding myself and my place in the world and I can say that I still don't have everything together yet whoops.
 
When I was 18, I didn't feel like an adult. Even up to this day I don't think 18 and 19 year olds should be considered adults by law. If the word "teen" is still in those numbers, then you're a teen in my eyes. Nobody should be expecting you to understand the real world. I think you should just worry about yourself and not worry about what others think. I've met and know a few 20 something year olds who still live with their parents. All I can tell you is when you do find a job, save up. Take advantage of this time and however many years you've got before you decide to move out yourself, or before it's brought up. Make sure you're able to financially support yourself.

I'm 35 years old, and I even see people who are in their early to mid 20s as kids. Not as children, don't get my words confused. So when you're in your 20s, yeah, you'll probably still feel like a kid. And don't worry about paying taxes. You'll have to eventually do it, but it's not really something to worry about. Overall, just don't worry about what others think. Just live life and do what you got to do. Enjoy it, because, as cliche as this sounds, it goes by quick.
 
The second you tell yourself you can’t have fun anymore is the second your life becomes mundane and a chore. Yes, adults have more responsibilities to take care of, taxes to pay, etc, but that doesn’t mean we can’t have fun too! You just have to know when it’s time to be casual and when you need to act serious and mature about things.
this is exactly right. the worst times of my life have been when I was drowning in schoolwork and couldn't take any time to enjoy the things I love. no matter how busy you are or how mature you need to be, ALWAYS remember to stay light-hearted and have fun. if you try to live life and always be serious then it really does just feel like a chore.
 
i really really understand this since i turned 18 only a month ago and my parents are acting like i have an obligation to be on their same level of maturity 😅 (while also acting like i won’t be able to handle myself in the ‘real’ world)

i didn’t feel a difference at all from 17 to 18, except maybe now i’m more stressed bc i’m supposed to go to uni in a week and still haven’t really decided on what to do with my life. i wish i could tell you something more reassuring other than it’ll all work out in the end (which i’m also repeating to myself daily) :) hang in there !
 
I've been told your 20s are like your teens only you have more responsibility and need to pay taxes.

I've been 20 for a few months and I can confirm I feel like a child with adult responsibilities. It's weird how age doesn't seem to affect you mentally for a good while. It's really not all bad though, don't rush into growing up too quickly and take your time with it.
 
Every culture observes a different coming-of-age milestone. It's 18 in yours, it's 21 in mine. When you're on the threshold of a milestone, it always feels like it isn't happening fast enough.

I remember being impatient to become an adult. I wanted to be able to make my own decisions, run my own life, go wherever I wanted to. Then I became an adult, and realized that with great power comes great responsibility life is complicated and messy, and that having enough money to do what you want after being able to put a roof over your head and food on the table, is always a major consideration. You can't live on love and fresh air.

Now my body says I'm 56 and my brain lies blatantly to me about being a 21-year-old. Society tells me I'm only middle-aged but my bad knees and back say I'm lucky I can still move myself about. Life is a journey. I wouldn't say it's too short; it takes as much time as it needs to. Impatience is a human trait. We're all afflicted with it. It's not a bad thing, if it makes us anticipate the future with hope.

You'll be fine. Tomorrow will happen when it happens. Enjoy today. Because today is already here. :)
 
I am 17 and I relate to the limbo. Honestly, I’m absolutely miserable at school right now and I will not miss high school when it’s over. The ignorance in the student body is astronomical.
 
I just turned 17 a month ago. While it can be annoying at times to be dependent on parents, I feel that being this age gives us a lot of freedom while we don't have to deal with most of the burdens of adult life. We don't have to pay the bills, we don't have to worry about jobs. I remember going to the store last weekend and I saw several kids around my age having fun and messing around, I almost wanted to join them. Just doing that is considered "acceptable" and perhaps just won't feel right when you're an adult. I feel like although teenage years can be a drag sometimes, they're kind of the best years of our lives in that sense. When I was a freshman and sophomore in high school, I didn't take any risks nor opportunities. I just sat in my own world angry at everyone else. But when I started to open up, life became so much better. Of course, this was cut short due to the pandemic of course. I'm now a senior in high school, also one of the younger ones, and regretting what I could've done in those earlier years so I feel this is why it's important to just enjoy and make the best of these years that we'll never get back.
 
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