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- Thread starter astoria
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I'm getting a real "I don't want to tip so don't you dare make me think about you or your feelings because that makes me feel bad 
" vibe from this thread. I honestly don't get why this is an issue. I guess there's always gonna be those kinds of costumers that feel entitled to services and time
" vibe from this thread. I honestly don't get why this is an issue. I guess there's always gonna be those kinds of costumers that feel entitled to services and time
Then those people who expect tips should just ask a fee instead. A tip is not mandatoryI'm getting a real "I don't want to tip so don't you dear make me think about you or your feelings because that makes me feel bad
I don’t think you’re on the same page.. you’re not even reading the same book!I'm getting a real "I don't want to tip so don't you dare make me think about you or your feelings because that makes me feel bad
michealsmells
Lesbianism 🏳️🌈 Fr
I totally get this. I used to not accept tips or any kind of payment on my island until people started insisting to tip me. I always say tips are appreciated in initial posts when asking folks to come over, but I never, EVER expect nor require anyone to give me tips.
That being said I do also feel pressured to tip at times- like people offer so much I gotta give something in return. In that case I usually just directly ask people, "do you want something else in return?" and wait for their answer.
That being said I do also feel pressured to tip at times- like people offer so much I gotta give something in return. In that case I usually just directly ask people, "do you want something else in return?" and wait for their answer.
oof this thread got stinky real fast. tipping is optional, while i might argue for the semantics/usage of “tips appreciated, not required,” i also think that expecting people to tip and getting irate/upset/what have you when you don’t get one is.... entitled? if you want something in return, post a fee otherwise it’s just stinky.
I fail to see how you can get this vibe when everyone explained they don't have a problem with giving tips, but with the hypocrisy and guilt-tripping.I'm getting a real "I don't want to tip so don't you dear make me think about you or your feelings because that makes me feel bad
Also, when you say "I guess there's always gonna be those kinds of costumers that feel entitled to services and time", you're not talking about a tip anymore, as services are offered and paid with a fee. Fees aren't tips, and tips aren't fees. You give tips to someone as an act of gratitude because they did you a favor. If they were offering you a service, then you would be paying them a fee.
Okay so this is what I’m talking about
in a place called NO FEE island visits, all the posts are mentioning tips, it’s so frequent now that the mods are having to step in and remind people. I would post more examples but it seems now they are deleting the posts that mention donations or tips.
Names crossed out for privacy
What a wholesome community /s
oof from what i’ve seen, acnh discords have been pretty lawless lands and just have a ton of chaos. i’ve been trading/hosting mostly on tbt and i was only taking tbt into account and not discord, but with that in the mix..... man oof.
Yeah my complaints were mainly about the discord because it’s a very popular one with tons of members and I usually go there because it’s always active and I wanna see the different islands to get inspiration, but it’s tiring seeing that in every single posts it feels like no one wants to hang out on their island for fun. I’ve never visited any islands on TBT forums so I don’t know how it is but I was speaking in experience to discord.
I have been visiting some people from here and, thankfully, most people I interacted with were always friendly. I could make a list of people who spontaneously approached me to offer things for free, or just had me on their islands because they wanted to simply hang out with other players for fun.
I also dealt with a few people from a more financial standpoint (as a buyer) and I had no problems (even if I have to admit, these were cold, purely commercial interactions).
I also have been opening my island to others for free (as always). I take people on tours, host for diys, call people for then to pick items they want...
But I can see that, if I was more involved in the commercial side of the community, things probably wouldn't be that way.
Millysaurusrexjr
standing on business
Man that reminds me of those islands on the turnip exchange in the NO FEE section still charging fees lol
Yeah I’m new to the forums even though I’ve been here for a few weeks so eventually I might check out some of the islands here. I joined because I miss the format of forums and not sites like reddit where your posts only get responses if they’re upvoted. I’ve made many topics about AC on there and would never get any comments cause my posts weren’t popular enough so I feel with forums there’s more discussion.
Also yeah by hanging around discord a lot I see a side of the community that just feels entitled and just want to get items in exchange and not really enjoy making friends or sharing their island.
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The mods on the discord updated their post and now I see they are getting rid of posts that mention any of the following. When they say this it makes me feel like they understand if people see tips all the time they will feel pressured to give them or that they’re subtly asking for tips.
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In your earlier post, you implied that the phrase was passive aggressive and was a front for people who felt insecure about demanding entry fees. Even if this isn’t the case you were making in that post, I still feel that it insinuates that the phrase is “wrong”.
I completely agree with you that it functions as a reminder. People who say that phrase genuinely would like tips if people are able to provide them. Personally, I would feel a bit disappointment if I didn’t get any tips, but I wouldn’t have a grudge or feel any anger towards the people I hosted as I strictly mentioned that tips were unnecessary. By using this phrase, you must be able to accept the consequence of getting no tips, and that’s okay. It’s the wrong phrase to use if you absolutely wanted some sort of payment in return.
Though tying in with the shoe analogy, I still don’t think it mirrors the same situation. Running through both scenarios in my head, I feel that the amount of pressure is very different. Considering the social context, it’s more so a request rather than a reminder. It’s similar to someone saying “you don’t have to help stack the chairs, but it would be appreciated”. You don’t exactly know that they’d want you to take off you shoes/stack the chairs in the first place, and they know that too. So the phrase functions as a sort of polite request. Say at a fundraising event that’s part of a sports game, someone says at the end of a speech, “You don’t have to donate, but it would be appreciated”. You’re already aware that donating is possible since it’s a fundraising event, so it functions more so as a reminder. You can attend the sports game and not donate money, and that’s fine. This is a similar case as tipping in AC. Most people are aware that tipping exists, thus the phrase acts as a reminder. A reminder causes much less pressure than denying an easy to do request. Though all in all, this phrase should ideally act as it means literally. Using it in the form of a request definitely comes off as more passive aggressive than using it as a reminder. I know that this phrase can be interpreted as a request, which is what makes people feel obligated to do so. However, I hope that people realize that the majority of people who use it don’t mean it that way.
EDIT: I just wanted to add that a major incentive for people to use this phrase is so they can still receive some tips without needing to enforce an entry fee. It takes much more work to make sure that everyone is paying the fee. There’s also more stress placed on the host as the fee should be enforced so that it’s fair to others. It’s a win-win situation for both sides.
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In my opinion from using the discord server, and at the time barely having 20k bells / 1-2 nmt to my name. I felt immensely pressured to tip when visiting towns who said "tips appreciated" and I would scramble because I felt to not tip would be rude, and I didn't want to make them feel insulted by tipping 1k bells so I would tip 5k, and that would be 1/4th of my bank. Tips are supposed to be an extra sign of gratitude. When I see someone writing "tips appreciated" I automatically think, okay this person is wanting tips for their service, and now I'm going to feel like a jackass if I don't tip so I can't help but feel pressured to do so. If you truly want to give things for free, don't mention tipping at all. And then when someone wants to show you an extra sign of gratitude such as a tip, it would be something they went completely out of their own way to do. And I think that's something worth appreciating. If you mention tips, others might tip you due to social obligation, because it just feels rude not to when it has already been mentioned. And if you want tips! Just charge a fee! It makes the guesswork so much easier, I would much rather visit a town with a fee than a town that says "tips appreciated" That way I don't have to feel guilty, if I insulted them or whatever, and I know exactly how much they want for their services.
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