Unisex bathrooms

[That Zephyr Guy]

So you just ask every single person on the street you come across what their pronouns are before simply asking for directions or when someone dropped their wallet? 'no idea if thats a man or a woman... 5 years later.. wallet is gone.. gender still not figured out'

and no, when people first meet, girls look like girls, guys look like guys, not always because of their hair or clothes, but voice, facial structures, body. That's how you usually notice.

If somebody corrects you, then you just change what you're using. You don't necessarily have to ask.

If you're worried someone might get offended, go with a gut feeling, or stick with "they".

 

[seliph]

I don't mean that at all, do you people always find the tiniest thing to be offended about? I mean you will come to peace with it, with their gender, with their feelings, not with being the gender they were born as.

I never said you meant it in that sense, I'm saying the reason why it's something that shouldn't be said.

 

[LethalLulu]

I think we should just have lines of private bathrooms in public places.
I don't like the thought of anybody listening to me take a dump.

Ahhh wouldn't that be nice <3
Sadly, that'd be way too expensive for most places.

 

[leftTBT]

No
No
No
No
You refer to someone by what they say you should refer to them, not what's in their pants. Like what is this, when people first meet each other they rip off their pants+ underwear instead of shaking hands?

I laughed so, so hard at that. XD
edit: I'm talking about the 'Like what is this, when people first meet each other they rip off their pants+ underwear instead of shaking hands?' part, btw.

 

[Jacob]

Gosh, can we talk about anything here without fighting? ._.

I'd hardly call this fighting, more like a debate. Threads like these that can be argued for both sides usually end up like this, which isn't really a bad thing.

People who participate and read the opinions and sources of others can get educated and decide for themselves which side should be accepted. If we don't have topics like this, people will be very uneducated and speak nonsense when these kind of things show up.
It only becomes a problem when people criticize others opinions due to their demeanor and something off topic, that's a fight.

 

[LethalLulu]

I laughed so, so hard at that. XD

Haha, I'm glad.

 

[ZetaFunction]

They're good because it means if the boys/girls restroom is full you can go use it no matter your gender, plus it makes trans/genderfluid/etc. feel more comfortable (I'm assuming?) since it's a non-gendered bathroom, but the bad part that I see is that pervs could easily go in and stalk people like if a kid went into the unisex bathroom there could be a 100+ year old man just standing there not using it and because it's unisex you can't tell him to leave so he could watch kids/perv. Honestly, I try to avoid unisex bathrooms when I can because I know it's a pretty low chance of that type of stuff happening but I'm not taking any chances.

 

[leftTBT]

I'd hardly call this fighting, more like a debate. Threads like these that can be argued for both sides usually end up like this, which isn't really a bad thing.

People who participate and read the opinions and sources of others can get educated and decide for themselves which side should be accepted. If we don't have topics like this, people will be very uneducated and speak nonsense when these kind of things show up.
It only becomes a problem when people criticize others opinions due to their demeanor and something off topic, that's a fight.

I completely agree; I was just expecting there to be a fight from how it started out, but it toned back down.

 

[Gregriii]

Wtf, no. When you meet someone, like a colleague at work, a classmate at school, or a roommate, etc, someone you'll see MULTIPLE times, you will say your name which can imply your gender. If not, you can correct them if they do misgender you. Do you randomly walk up to people on the street, shake hands and introduce yourself only to ask for directions? No.

Alos wrong. One of my male friends at my last university looked feminine because he had boobs. He was still a guy...
And he introduced himself as James. KINDA proves that he identifies as male.

I wonder what would have happened if the name had been Alex, for example

 

[LethalLulu]

I wonder what would have happened if the name had been Alex, for example

Then I might accidentally say "she" once, and after he corrected me, say sorry, and don't misgender him again.
Boom, done.

 

[seliph]

Can a mod close this thread? It's getting out of control

This isn't really that bad actually. But you should just report the thread rather than make comments like this.

 

[LethalLulu]

Wolfy, do you have a rebuttal for my response on the bottom of page 6?
I'd like to know what you think of my response to you.

 

[Oblivia]

This isn't really that bad actually. But you should just report the thread rather than make comments like this.

This exactly.

That being said, everyone does need to tone it back a bit and chill with the insults. It's sad to me how threads regarding any topic that's even remotely controversial have to be closed because people can't be civil. It really shouldn't be this hard. I don't have a problem leaving this open for now, but be warned that it will be closed if things get too out of hand.

And please, no more posts about how something should be closed. Report it if you think it's bad enough to be looked into and myself or another staff member will be right on it.

 

[LethalLulu]

This exactly.

That being said, everyone does need to tone it back a bit and chill with the insults. It's sad to me how threads regarding any topic that's even remotely controversial have to be closed because people can't be civil. It really shouldn't be this hard. I don't have a problem leaving this open for now, but be warned that it will be closed if things get too out of hand.

And please, no more posts about how something should be closed. Report it if you think it's bad enough to be looked into and myself or another staff member will be right on it.

Thanks, Oblivia. Civil debates are one of my favorite things on this site.
I only got slightly personal once, and my emotions happened to take over a little because of how personal the subject was to me.

 

[Wolfycheeks]

Wtf, no. When you meet someone, like a colleague at work, a classmate at school, or a roommate, etc, someone you'll see MULTIPLE times, you will say your name which can imply your gender. If not, you can correct them if they do misgender you. Do you randomly walk up to people on the street, shake hands and introduce yourself only to ask for directions? No.

Alos wrong. One of my male friends at my last university looked feminine because he had boobs. He was still a guy...
And he introduced himself as James. KINDA proves that he identifies as male.

What I think, TL;DR version because I'm a bit done discussing: If you're male, present male, you get called male, won't be misgendered if you do it right, vice versa. Change your name if neccisary. Dress like how you want to be seen as. Also if your friend with the boobs is trans, he should probably try binding, if that isn't an option then plaid shirts work really well too.

 

[LethalLulu]

What I think, TL;DR version because I'm a bit done discussing: If you're male, present male, you get called male, won't be misgendered if you do it right, vice versa. Change your name if neccisary. Dress like how you want to be seen as. Also if your friend with the boobs is trans, he should probably try binding, if that isn't an option then plaid shirts work really well too.

He doesn't want to, and shouldn't have to. He can wear whatever he wants. Sometimes he'd wear dresses, too, and that's a-ok.

 

[RainbowCherry]

You changed the itallics to a strikeout, that's where I got confused and thought maybe I read the comment wrong


I never said it wouldn't be suspicious, I'm not sure where you're getting at honestly. I'm saying men walk into the women's washroom with intent to assault all the time, and having unisex/trans-friendly bathrooms isn't gonna heighten that.

I understand your point, if they were going to do it they would do it anyway, but a man standing in a woman's bathroom, vice versa, (caught, mind you, bathrooms are typically very desolate, so they could do it anyway, but hypothetically.), could get found and, despite not being able to be punished technically I suppose, could theoretically get their ass beaten or something? I... don't actually know.

But a man standing in a unisex bathroom could, unless he was caught in the physical act of the perving, blend in with... plain sight, I suppose is how you would word it?

That being said, everyone dies

WHAT

Don't think we didn't see that cheeky ninja edit m8

 

[Wolfycheeks]

He doesn't want to, and shouldn't have to. He can wear whatever he wants. Sometimes he'd wear dresses, too, and that's a-ok.

Oh, if you want my opinion on this too, it's bull****. If you want to be seen as a guy, if you're really a trans guy, if you're really dysphoric, then you don't wear dresses and don't have your boobs hanging out. Why do I think clothes have a gender? Because society thinks so, and like I said, if you want to be taken seriously as a guy, you don't wear make up, you don't wear a dress. You try to look masculine, to look masculine, to be gendered he/him, to get called sir.

 

[Princess]

who cares if bathrooms are unisex honestly
why is this such a big issue

 

[skarmoury]

Dunno what's happning up there with the other comments (actually can we keep this on topic, it's kinda getting out of hand ///)

If you meant unisex specifically for transgender and such then that's totally fine, whatever makes them comfortable, as long as there are still separate bathrooms for men and women. But like if you meant unisex in a way that makes only one bathroom for everyone then I guess I wouldn't be so comfortable with that...? Idk something about it makes me kinda eh.

Also just a sort of segway, I find it kinda hard to greet people whose gender I initially don't know about or can't tell, because in Filipino we have gender-specific nouns for slightly older people ("ate" for older girls and "kuya" for older guys), kinda like "sister" and "brother" but without the general term "siblings", so I initially have a hard time calling someone politely if they're gay or tomboy, but I do ask them eventually what to call them so as not to be rude ^^;