My dad just told me bisexual is gross

[Xerolin]

So, me and my dad are always joking around and such, endless inside jokes, one of which being "You're _" or "Your name is _". We were watching a video on youtube and the subject of bisexualality was brought up. I consider my dad homophobic, and I'm bi, which he doesn't know. I say "You like guys and girls" And he says "Ew, what, no, that's gross". I told him I was joking and he told not to joke about stuff like that. He was pretty much saying "Bisexuality is gross." To me, it sounded more like "You're gross." I'm really p***ed off rn and upset.. I dread the day my dad finds out I'm bisexual

 

[SlipStitch626]

I'm sorry to hear that. I hope you have good social supports. A lot of people have negative attitudes towards sexual minorities but a lot of people also have positive attitudes.

 

[RainbowCherry]

I honestly think he's joking, considering the use of "ew, what, no"...

I don't know though.

 

[Xerolin]

I honestly think he's joking, considering the use of "ew, what, no"...

I don't know though.

He's not, I could tell, and he's always been negative towards LGBT stuff..
Plus that's not exactly what he said, he just said something along those lines

 

[seliph]

It doesn't sound like a joke to me at all

You don't necessarily have to tell your dad though. If it's possible to do it without outing yourself I'd suggest challenging him when the topic arises again

 

[timecapsule]

I've heard stories of people whose parents were very homophobic, but when they told them they were gay or bi or something they were like "I'm sorry for saying that stuff"

Of course it's not always like that but hey, you never know?

I'm sorry he said that though. <3

 

[Aloha]

If I were you,I wouldn't tell my family.Not now anyways.Depending on how old you are,I'd wait until I move out and I'm on my own.

 

[skarmoury]

Disown your dad. Don't let him disown you. Assert dominance.

(Just kidding, but we're here for you! Don't let his negativity get to you. Just remember to stay true to yourself no matter what he or other people say. <3 ^^)

 

[Hulaette]

I'm sorry that your father doesn't know who you really are. You can either explain and educate your father that bi sexual people are not gross and it's become a normal thing in this day and age. or if you are scared that he'll disown you just don't tell him and maybe tell him when your a lot older. I hope my advice helps. remember. The entire forum loves and supports you Xerolin! if you need to talk you can always PM me! I will listen to you vent anytime. *hugs*

 

[Miii]

Anything relating to your sexuality is probably going to be an awkward conversation to have with your parents. But you have to remember, you being attracted to ANYONE is probably gonna be weird for your dad because he raised you. He changed your diapers. He's watched you grow your entire life up to this point. And you being bisexual will probably be a shock to him (and when people are shocked, they don't tend to phrase their feelings tactfully) because he won't see it coming. Plus, you realizing your sexuality means you're growing up, maybe faster than he anticipated.

Rather than being angry at your dad for reacting in a shocked/surprised manner and letting his initial reaction prevent you from talking to him about it, just try being honest with him. Whenever you decide to come out, mention that how he reacted when he saw that video hurt your feelings, even if his words weren't directed towards you at the time. If you approach it neutrally, the situation is more likely to stay calm rather than blow up and get overly emotional. And if you mention to him that you're telling him because you just want to be honest with him, and be able to tell him things like that, it might give him a new perspective on the issue.

 

[Xerolin]

Thanks for the support guys. I doubt he'd ever disown me, we've always been SUPER close and the best of friends. When I do tell him, I assume he'll be just be dissapointed and upset with me. I do plan on telling him many thingd when I'm older, around highschool.

 

[Fantasyrick]

So, me and my dad are always joking around and such, endless inside jokes, one of which being "You're _" or "Your name is _". We were watching a video on youtube and the subject of bisexualality was brought up. I consider my dad homophobic, and I'm bi, which he doesn't know. I say "You like guys and girls" And he says "Ew, what, no, that's gross". I told him I was joking and he told not to joke about stuff like that. He was pretty much saying "Bisexuality is gross." To me, it sounded more like "You're gross." I'm really p***ed off rn and upset.. I dread the day my dad finds out I'm bisexual

How old r u? Bc like tbh if you know he's homophobic then go over to a friends house when you're going to tell him.

 

[Xerolin]

How old r u? Bc like tbh if you know he's homophobic then go over to a friends house when you're going to tell him.

12, turning 13 soon. I don't have any irl friends, I'm homeschooled, but I'll be going back to public school and making friends next school year

 

[KaydeeKrunk]

I still haven't outed myself to my mom, though I am not sure if my sister has or not, but it's not like she'd believe I was since I am in a committed hetero relationship, because she likes to repress my problems because of things that seem to conflict. Such as my mom thinking I don't have anxiety or social problems because I can hold a job and talk to people, no matter how many times I bring it up she scoffs and says "you don't have anxiety!" I consider myself pansexual, though at a younger age I considered myself bisexual, and my mom would constantly be disgusted by gays in media, like when I watched Rent with her she would make retching noises when the homosexual couples were kissing, saying things like "wow she must be a good actor, I would never be able to kiss another woman like that, so disgusting!" And I'd just be sitting there keeping my little gay mouth shut... It even sucked when I still felt she couldn't handle it when she asked me directly if I was gay after she found out I had been cutting myself, so I lied and said no. I don't know if I'll ever tell her but I don't really care too, she's the kind of person who uses phrases like "that's mighty white of you" because she was raised to be very intolerant of so, so many things. It's hard to deal with but sometimes it's best if they don't know.

The ONE good thing about this is if you ever get a girlfriend they wont care if she sleeps in your room as long as you call her your friend. XD Worked for me at least.

 

[radioloves]

Ohh, but how is it gross? I'm sorry to hear that your dad thinks it's gross. I hope maybe one day he'll accept bisexuality and be fine with you being bi; probably wait for a good time to let him know, I'm sure he'll accept c:

 

[Chris]

Just reads to me like he was offended that you might say that about him. People can get pretty defensive about that sort of thing. He might have a different opinion if it was about someone else.

 

[Nightmares]

I wouldn't tell him about it. Honestly, I think all this "coming out" stuff is stupid; no one has to announce they're straight, so why do people have to announce they're LGBT+? You have no reason to tell him, especially as you're younger, and won't be getting in serious relationships soon, I don't think.

 

[himeki]

wtaf people can date who they want to date i dont get the big deal???

 

[Soda Fox]

My dad told my sister and I that if we ever dated girls he would disown us. I don't think he world really do that. He might take some time to get used to the idea, but I know hrs come around. We're his children after all. I'm sure your dad would be the same.

 

[SensaiGallade]

Honestly everyone is entitled to their own opinion but as people we should accept each other for the way we are. I'm sorry about your dad attitude towards bisexuality; I would be worried if I was in you position but that's just me.

I hope everything works out for you. TBT is always welcoming you in open arms.