Have you ever lost a loved one yet?

[Blood Eclipse]

I'm just curious about this subject. This can include people you know, people you grew up with or even pets.

My other question is how do you react to he immense stress it causes.

Are you the type of person who doesn't react immediately to bad news and reality takes a while to sink in?

Are you the type who no longer feels pain because you're so used to it, it's lost its grip on you, so you don't get sad angry or cry?

Are you the type who cries immediately and spends the longest time depressed and contemplating suicide even?

Or are you the type who gets over bad news quickly?

And how do you deal with the death of a loved one if it does cause you pain?

As for me, I've only lost my cat so far. He meant the world to me as I grew up with him and knew his habits and what he wanted just by looking at him. His name was Cookie. He had a bad start, since he was abandoned then mistreated by the neighbors to the point that I found him badly injured and about to die, so me and my parents decided to take him to the vet and from then keep him as our own. I wish he could've had a better life and not start out the way he did.

When he got sick and died it took me awhile for reality to sink in. I didn't cry at first, so I felt like a terrible person for that, but as the days went by and he wasn't by my side when I woke up, or at the table when it cane time to eat or sleeping in his usual spot, then it started to hit me that he wouldn't come back...

Depression finally started kicking in and I cried every rime I thought about him and his beginnings. How I was powerless to save his life and what he probably thought when I took him to the vet to put him down. In his last moments, ge probably thought I too abandon him. :, (

Even now it hurts, but time has lessened the pain, though I still cry if I dwell on the thought.

I don't believe in an afterlife, so knowing I'd never see my cat again made it hurt just that much more.

I wonder how much more woukd it hurt losing a parent, brother, sister, wife husband, person.

I haven't experienced losing my parents yet and I have no clue hiw I'd deal with the pain or how I'd react.

So if you've lost someone you loved, giw did you deal with it and hiw did it make you feel?

 

[Princess Mipha]

Are you the type of person who doesn't react immediately to bad news and reality takes a while to sink in?
I'm personally reacting instantly. Almost one year ago my beloved rabbit Mido died pretty much out of nowhere.
He must've licked his fur too much and it clocked his belly. The doctors told me and my boyfriend that the chances
of him surviving are very high (I had a very bad feeling about it tho) and not 2 hours after we gave him to the doctor
we got a call that he had passed away. I reacted pretty much instantly to it and almost had to throw up because of it.
Worst part was, that my bf's family was there at this moment to make their holidays and we were supposed to go
somewhere this day..

Are you the type who no longer feels pain because you're so used to it, it's lost its grip on you, so you don't get sad angry or cry?
Nah, I could never just have no feelings over a death of a beloved animal / person.
I will always cry and blame myself for doing something wrong, even though everybody tells me they never saw someone
take such good care of animals before. It always feels like I did something wrong, so I get pretty angry about myself.

Are you the type who cries immediately and spends the longest time depressed and contemplating suicide even?
Yeah, that's me. I had a guinea pig for 6 years and she made the travel with me when I moved from Germany to France
and she had to be put to sleep because she had a huge tumor in well, everywhere pretty much.
Anyways, at this time I was already pretty down since I knew she would die soon and her death hit me more than any
other death, because I had a really special connection to her. She was pretty much my best friend the whole time.
So, it made me even more depressed. I mean, I cried for over 2 weeks and yeah, at one point suicide was an option
in my head, but I could never do that, while I still have other animals to care for to be honest.

Or are you the type who gets over bad news quickly?
Nope, not at all. To be honest, so far I've "only" lost one person that I used to care a lot about.
It was my uncle, last living brother of my father. He was my favorite person from my whole family,
until he met a woman that took him away from me, as she hated kids and she somehow made my
uncle pretty much forget about me. So.. it was pretty hurting to hear that he had passed away,
but I overcame it quickly, since we had no more contact. Sometimes I still think about it tho and
it makes me a bit sad.

And how do you deal with the death of a loved one if it does cause you pain?
Uh, good question.. I can't really answer that, as all I do to deal with it is crying until it
somehow gets better by itself and I try to take even better care of my animals meanwhile.

 

[Bowie]

I lost a loved one this year. Visiting him at mental hospitals, confronting him about his suicide attempts, going over it in my head again and again, wondering to this day if there’s anything I could’ve done different. It’s been the hardest thing I’ve ever went through, and has hurt me more than any family death, somehow. I can’t sleep, I can’t focus on anything in my own life. It’s destroyed everything for me and often I’ve found myself questioning my own will to live since then.

To answer your questions, bad news takes time to sink in for me. Generally speaking, I can’t think retrospectively about something bad until months or years after it’s happened. If a lot of bad things happen in one go it’s a lot more numbing, for sure, but nonetheless you end up tackling each and every one of them at some point, so numeracy has little value when it comes to facing things. I used to cry a lot but there’s a lot of people I have to see in my daily life, so I don’t want to cry in front of them. I just schedule it in if I have the time, as dumb as that does sound.

My philosophy has always been that negativity is an opportunity for positivity. I wouldn’t have met the man I lost had it not been for growing up in an abusive home and seeking help, or know any of the people I’ve come to know as friends had it not been for other certain “tragic” elements of my past. Think about the day you were born and then today, the present day, and you’ll come to appreciate how fate, or God (if that’s more your thing), has treated you. It’s all just putting things into place. And you inevitably lose people along the way.

I hope you feel better soon, assuming you’ve recently lost someone or something.

 

[Midoriya]

Yes, I’ve lost loved ones in the past. But I don’t cry or anything over it. I know that’s not what they would want, and that that day would come eventually, so I have to hold it in and be strong for them.

“I will shed no tears. A year ago, I felt the same sense of deep loss that I do now… After that battle, many of my friends did not make it home. While I was being brought here on that stretcher, they were all I thought about. But I decided I would not cry. Everyone who died in that war had something they wanted to protect. Family, friends, loved ones, their home… So they fought to protect them. And we won. No matter how painful, no matter how hard, it’s nothing to be sad about… I decided that there and then… Shulk, Fiora would say the same thing. She wanted to protect us. Or rather, she wanted to protect you. And you’re alive now. So I will not cry… Remember the gift of life that Fiora gave you, and treasure it.” - Dunban in Xenoblade Chronicles

 

[Jessy_Azran]

Beware - long speech.


Everyone grieves differently, if you cry, scream, vomit, it doesn't mean you're weak. If you sit around sulking, and not caring about the person, that is weak.


I've got so much bad luck lately, it's like I'm cursed or something. Lost three friends to suicide. One of my friends was driving home from work at night. She looked both ways before restarting the car when it turned green, then a drunk man hit a red light. Life when completely bs. The moment I picked up the phone of the news, I collapsed on the floor. I remember that day like it was yesterday. I'm in denial they're gone, but I still go to their graves, put their favourite flowers and do the things we were supposed to do together.


Exactly a year after the first friend died, my black labrador Benny suffered a throat tumour and I gave permission for the vet to use euthanasia. I had to, I can't see him suffer so badly, it would be too cruel to let an animal live while having that sort of illness. A week later, my former Maths teacher suffered a heart attack. He was only 28. Fully healthy, but the defect was genetic.


A month later, my great-grandma passed away from a stroke. It hit me, but my father was understandably more hurt than me. She was a lovely woman.


I have moved on now, but not one day have I not thought about them. It's not like I'm dwelling on things, I'm thinking of all the good memories, and not those phone calls. Everyone grieves differently, and no one should be ashamed of crying.

 

[xSuperMario64x]

Ice lost many loved ones, especially over the last two years. Almost a year ago I lost one of my cats who was my best friend, she was only a year and a half old when she died. I didn't take it well then, and even now when I think about the circumstances of her death I can't help but burst into tears.

Less than a week ago a very good friend of mine and my dad's passed away, and to be honest I'm still in denial about it. I can't believe he's gone. But he's been battling cancer for a while, so it brings me peace to know that he's not suffering anymore.

I can usually handle losing someone I care about, but if I feel like they didn't deserve to lose their life, or that their death could've been easily preventable, that's when I can't handle it.

 

[LadyDestani]

Yes, I've lost many loved ones..many pets, all of my grandparents and some great aunts and uncles. I am always sad when I lose someone I love and I do cry, but I am an adult now so I also understand that I have responsibilities and have to carry on.

When my pets die now, I have to make all of the arrangements and sometimes even bury them myself. While both of my parents are still living, they are in somewhat ill health and nearing an age where I know something could happen to them at anytime. When they go, I will have to handle everything myself, including their arrangements and what to do with all of their financials and belongings. All of that just adds stress to an already difficult time, but unfortunately it has to be done. I will still mourn, but I will push through it and do what I have to do as well.

The hardest deaths for me are the ones that come unexpectedly. If I know the person or animal is ill or suffering, it is still painful but easier for me to deal with. When one of my cats just suddenly died with no warning at only 8 years old (her heart just stopped, likely a genetic defect but never detected), that was very traumatic and I had a much harder time accepting her death. I would still look up and expect to see her sitting there for months afterwards.

 

[ams]

Yeah I've lost my mom and my sister. Plus all of my grandparents and my two childhood cats, but as sad as those losses are they don't compare to losing immediate family. I guess my reaction was shock, being kind of incapacitated for a few days, then a few months of still not feeling like life will be ok again, then after that acceptance.

 

[radical6]

No actually. I guess I'm lucky. I lost my dad's parents but I never saw them. My mom's parents are pretty young so I think they have some time left. No pets have died either, though my dog is about 7 right now. Or 8. I hope he lives til 12 or 13 because hes still pretty active for an old dog. I got him in 2011 iirc.

But have I lost someone? Yeah I guess. I don't actually know if she's dead, but a close friend of mine ran off and relapsed. I have no idea if she's fine, dead from overdose, or just struggling to get by. Or in rehab. No one knows where she is. My reaction was just anger at first now numbness.

 

[visibleghost]

three of my grandparents are dead but two of them died when i was really small so i didn't react much. my dad's mom died in 2013 and that was really sad but my dad was way more affected than i was obviously.

 

[Soigne]

I'm only twenty, but I've lost enough people for a lifetime. My family has been very unfortunate with heart disease and cancer, and as such I've lost several family members. I've had several friends end their lives. I've known several people who have been murdered. After a certain point, the harshness of death starts to lose its effect. Maybe that's only because I've been dealing with loss for more than half my life, but I really don't find myself crying anymore when someone I know dies. I've also lost many pets over the years. I'm just not a very lucky person, I suppose.

 

[nintendofan85]

A few. My grandma died this past January.

 

[G0DFlesh_88]

yea I lost a older sibling when I was in high school and my grandma both from cancer. I was shocked when it happened but I knew they were finally not going to suffer anymore. Cancer, Diabetes and heart problems cause the most deaths in our family.

 

[SherlockLina]

My grandpa died when i was young. My grandma and i visited his grave some. I loved him, and my dad took it hard two. He loved all of us. He died when i was young, and i dont remember him well. He is still with me always. That next easter there was a silver egg high in a tree that only i saw. Mema never had t in her collection, and i ahve some suspicions. I am about to start crying bc thee is a picture of me as a baby sleeping on grandpa's stomach, with grandpa asleep, and their dog buster laying on me. I still take it hard, and i feel guilty i dont know him well. God bless everybody who's loved ones died, and hope taht you will see them one day in heaven again.


Bless u all and thank you for your time!

 

[Sweetley]

When I was a kid, I lost my grandpa (the dad from my dad). He was such a amazing person, and it broke
my heart when he passed away.

 

[CasualWheezer]

I lost my mother four years ago, at first it bought a lot of grief and anxiety to my family and me, but I managed to accept it knowing she's in a better place now and I wouldn't be the person I am today.

 

[Beanz]

My uncle died 4 years ago but I didn’t know him well.

Other than people I’ve lost some pets. Sunny used to be a cockerspaniel and died in 2010, Ketcher (a bit of a weird name but we adopted him and he came with that name) was a poodle and died in 2016, Nemo was also a poodle and he died in 2018.

R.I.P Uncle, R.I.P Sunny, R.I.P Ketcher, and R.I.P Nemo.



All their deaths were saddening but for some reason I get really sad angry

 

[jacex]

Yeah. I guess it?s why I?m really scared of losing the people I care about and all. I don?t deal well with loss, I just shut down for a really long period of time. I don?t just move on so easily. But, I?d never contemplate suicide. I have some people around me dealing with that, and I really feel bad for them, so I guess at least I don?t have that to go through

 

[sandrabug]

I just lost my grandpa last year, I didn't know how I was going to react, we kinda knew it was coming
When it happened I went numb but my eyes kept pouring out tears. It felt as if the whole world stood still & I was so alone.
I sadly wasn't there to say bye, he was over 1,000 miles away. I think that is what i've been dealing with personally, is the fact that I wasn't there with my whole family when he took his last breath. He was my father figure growing up, him & my grandma were the positives in my life. I had just seen him 2 weeks prior & told him I'd see him at Christmas.
So to answer your questions. I am the type of person to grieve instantly but to also be strong for the people who need it, which I never thought I could do because I am or was a very emotional person that would cry at stepping on an ant.
It's been a tough year but also I know he's with me. We had an inside joke between my sister & grandparents about 11:11
& maybe its coincidence but I so happen to always catch that time am or pm.
I miss him everyday. I think about his smile, laugh, how he smelled, how he sounded playing guitar & singing, the way he told stories.
I don't think it will ever get easier tbh i'll just learn to deal with it & know how to cope.
He IS the greatest man i'll ever know. <3 :'(

 

[MelloDimensions]

I'm the type that would rather celebrate their life as opposed to grief, but it's still in the disposition like that of a sad clown as I will still feel pain.
I've lost family to age, and disease as well as a friend in an motorcycle accident. While I still think about them, and miss them that approach of celebration allows me to cope better. It's like they always say "They wouldn't want you to feel this way." And as cliche as that is it does help.

I also wanted to take it to myself to thank those that shared. I know it may be hard to some, so I really appreciate you doing that. That is all.