Has hating feminism become mainstream?

[Amykins]

Heh, sorry for the jarring title, but it's been bugging me a lot lately. I'm on the internet most of my day, I work from home and I help run several blog sites, podcasts, etc. But there's one thing I know I can't ever touch in any of my topics, and that's women in gaming. As a girl, and a gamer, I talk about game reviews, the industry and general nerd stuff. But the moment I bring negative female tropes into the discussion, I know it's a death sentence for my show.

All the time, I see anti-feminist rants on youtube comments, reddit posts, and blogs, all of which have an insane number of upvotes to them. You can't even mention the word "feminism" without sparking a flame war.

It upsets me to the point of tears every time I see it. I know I should have a thicker skin, but it baffles me how in recent years this whole MRA/anti-feminism movement has become such a widepsread phenomenon.

Please understand, I'm not trying to spark an intense argument or insult anyone. It's just an observation that affects me deeply, both as a woman and as someone ingrained in the geek culture.

 

[Piroshi]

I think a lot of people have a misunderstanding of feminism, and it doesn't help that the radical feminists are generally the most outspoken so that's what most people are exposed to. And then even within feminism there are so many different viewpoints and opinions, and even different feminists don't all agree with each other. A few years ago I looked down on feminism, and I'm a girl, but that was before I had an understanding of what feminism really was. Even now I hesitate to bring up the term "feminism" even when talking about things related to it because I know it'll get a negative reaction.

 

[EmmaFrost]

I'm a proud feminist.

I think a lot of misinformed women and girls think being a feminist means being bitter hags who hate men and believe that women are superior, when really, we just believe women are equal. That stigma is where the hate comes from and why women and girls shy away from identifying as feminists. It's sad, really.

 

[TheLostEmpire]

Apparently the modern day definition for feminism is a man hating female looking for special treatment.
That is why the term itself gets so much negative feedback if it is even slightly mentioned.
I have to agree with the stereotypes that many female characters get is annoying, but many male characters have the same problem.

 

[Autumnia]

I don't think that it's the rise of hatred of feminism but rather the rise of a gender-equality movement. By that I mean that instead of spreading feminist ideas many are moving towards overall equalisation of rights whether it is based on gender-rights, racial-rights or gay-rights. Any distaste towards feminism has begun form the idea that feminism only supports the rights of one of those groups.

 

[CR33P]

yes, i see it all the time on fb. that and fat cats, which are getting really annoying.

 

[Celestefey]

I think it's because people don't fully understand what feminism is or what they learn from feminism just makes them think "Oh, so they're trying to say women should be treated than men". I think there are some feminists who are like that and try to say that women are better than men (I know there is another word for this, though), which I don't think is true, I don't think there's a superior gender at all, we're all the same as one another, the only difference being is how our bodies are structured.

Whilst I'm all for feminism, I can't call myself a feminist, purely because I'm just not educated on a lot of feminism and I can't say it really takes much of a toll on me in every day life, as a female. Whilst I have experienced sexism (but both male and female experience that), I've never once felt like I'm experiencing discrimination or any differences just because I'm female, maybe that's just because I'm so used to what life is like now. Also, it's not like I could ever say to myself I'd go out there and fight for the rights, but I do support the cause.

A lot of feminism on the internet though, is not taken very seriously. I do agree that some of the points people make are very valid when they discuss/debate them calmly and I prefer it when things are like that. What I DON'T like is when I log onto Tumblr and have to see overly-obnoxious screaming about feminism. To be honest, I wouldn't like it if ANYONE was doing that, but maybe it's just me who doesn't like it when people are so obnoxious about a point in general. One thing that annoys me more than anything else is when women feel that it's okay to start saying "I hate men!" just because they may have bad experiences with men. Just, how can you say that when men surround us every single day and many are in fact feminists too? You can't claim all of them are against women's rights and what have you... Many are just ignorant and don't know and need to be educated, just like other fellow females need to, too! We're so used to things being so normal that we don't truly realize why or how we need feminism because that's how it has always been, you know? Until someone points it out to us, we'll carry on living the way we do, just oblivious to the feminism debate ongoing around us.

I believe there was a whole blog dedicated to women complaining about men taking up too much space on the train and that this was because the man was trying to dominate her and he was oppressing her and whatnot, all because he was taking up too much space on the train, which is just ridiculous... Yeah, because if you were just innocently sitting next to a female, your first thoughts would immediately be to show your power over her... NOT.

In a way, I believe sometimes the way feminism is argued and portrayed on the internet is not very good. I feel like some of the people arguing and fighting for feminism are going the wrong way about it (ESPECIALLY on Tumblr, goddammit). Maybe that's why people believe feminism is so wrong and bad, because they see all the bad stuff, but NEVER the good stuff.

 

[radical6]

oh cool a feminism thread
and yeah mostly people dont think what feminism is trying to achieve is worth it so they mock it
i dont really care too much about the TERFs or white feminists (no i dont mean all feminists who are white i mean the white ones who only care about white cis women and are rude as hell to women of color) though they can leave

and yes i do get sick of the anti feminist stuff because people dismiss it as "lol women hating men" when its so much more than that. but nowadays i ignore them because theyre not really worth my time. and i hate people who go "well...youre not THAT kind of feminist so youre okay!" (by that kind they mean the ones who are angry and are willing to fight back at people) and like.. what do you mean? do you want me to be nice about it?

honestly the hate around feminism and social justice is silly
im not saying feminism is perfect (look at TERFs and white fems) but for the most part its good. there are problems in feminism (feminists being mean isnt one of them) but yeah.
was actually thinking about making a thread about feminism but i wasnt too sure about the reactions i would get

 

[kite]

I think when people think "feminist" they think of the negative connotation "feminazi" and that has turned a lot of people off. A lot of it does have to do with the lack of exposure and understanding of what feminism is.

When I first heard "feminism" in high school, I also heard that it was for "women being better than men." Of course, that was purely hearsay and not a true understanding of what it really means to be a feminist.

Add that to the sexist perception that women should be subservient to men, and we have ourselves a long battle ahead of us.

The struggle for feminism and gender equality has never really been an easy road since the beginning.

 

[Piroshi]

A lot of feminism on the internet though, is not taken very seriously. I do agree that some of the points people make are very valid when they discuss/debate them calmly and I prefer it when things are like that. What I DON'T like is when I log onto Tumblr and have to see overly-obnoxious screaming about feminism. To be honest, I wouldn't like it if ANYONE was doing that, but maybe it's just me who doesn't like it when people are so obnoxious about a point in general. One thing that annoys me more than anything else is when women feel that it's okay to start saying "I hate men!" just because they may have bad experiences with men. Just, how can you say that when men surround us every single day and many are in fact feminists too? You can't claim all of them are against women's rights and what have you... Many are just ignorant and don't know and need to be educated, just like other fellow females need to, too! We're so used to things being so normal that we don't truly realize why or how we need feminism because that's how it has always been, you know? Until someone points it out to us, we'll carry on living the way we do, just oblivious to the feminism debate ongoing around us.

I believe there was a whole blog dedicated to women complaining about men taking up too much space on the train and that this was because the man was trying to dominate her and he was oppressing her and whatnot, all because he was taking up too much space on the train, which is just ridiculous... Yeah, because if you were just innocently sitting next to a female, your first thoughts would immediately be to show your power over her... NOT.

In a way, I believe sometimes the way feminism is argued and portrayed on the internet is not very good. I feel like some of the people arguing and fighting for feminism are going the wrong way about it (ESPECIALLY on Tumblr, goddammit). Maybe that's why people believe feminism is so wrong and bad, because they see all the bad stuff, but NEVER the good stuff.

I have to agree with this. I spend a lot of time on tumblr, and I spend a lot of time elsewhere too. On more than one occasion I've seen feminists defend feminism (as well as people defending different sexualities/gender identities/etc.) by saying things like, "Most of us aren't like the ones on tumblr." I think that when you're dealing with an issue like this you have to be very careful about how you go about it, and yelling at people and telling them they're terrible and saying awful things about them, whether you're serious or not, is going to turn them away. If you were in school and you hated taking algebra and didn't see the point of it, your teacher yelling at you and calling you stupid isn't going to make you realize the importance of it.

 

[EpicGamer12]

I think anyone that says "I'm a proud feminist" is not following their beliefs under feminism for doing what they believe in, but to give themselves a "cool" title and attention. Here's the thing: if you're a feminist, you don't need to brag about it, and you don't need to march around the streets (figuratively) with a banner. If you see someone that says something or has an action or opinion that goes against your belief, feel free to message them or talk to them in private about why you believe what you believe. You don't even need to include the word feminism, because calling it "equal rights among both sexes" works just as well. Many people who are "feminists" really don't know what they are talking about, and if you are making someone get angry or rant about you because of it, you're going about sharing your ideals incorrectly.

 

[radical6]

I have to agree with this. I spend a lot of time on tumblr, and I spend a lot of time elsewhere too. On more than one occasion I've seen feminists defend feminism (as well as people defending different sexualities/gender identities/etc.) by saying things like, "Most of us aren't like the ones on tumblr." I think that when you're dealing with an issue like this you have to be very careful about how you go about it, and yelling at people and telling them they're terrible and saying awful things about them, whether you're serious or not, is going to turn them away. If you were in school and you hated taking algebra and didn't see the point of it, your teacher yelling at you and calling you stupid isn't going to make you realize the importance of it.

honestly i only see feminists get mad is when people refuse to listen and they cant take it anymore so yeah of course theyre gonna get angry. it would be nice if we could all be nice and help them understand but some refuse to listen. i have calmly helped people with it and some agree with me and understand and the others turn away. so yeah you cant be nice to everyone

but feminism wont get anywhere with just being nice.

 

[Gizmodo]

People dont hate feminists... they hate radical feminists
that is all i ever hear
Whenever i ask people its "im all for feminism, and will always support the cause, but not radical feminism"
Tumblr and the like, have only helped to make feminism appear to be the radical sort you occasionally see, and distorted the original view..

 

[radical6]

People dont hate feminists... they hate radical feminists
that is all i ever hear
Whenever i ask people its "im all for feminism, and will always support the cause, but not radical feminism"
Tumblr and the like, have only helped to make feminism appear to be the radical sort you occasionally see, and distorted the original view..

i think radfems are fine as long as theyre not transphobic/racist. most of radfems i come across are gross but i dont think radical feminism itself is gross.

the problem with feminism is that there are so many different viewpoints so feminism isnt just one thing. i guess the general idea of feminism is equality for all but there are so many people who need it. most people think of feminism as women facing problems. (they do but idk how to explain it...so i mean they think there are problems only because they are women) there are some problems that effect all women but some women face it worse than others. what about trans women? queer women? women of color? disabled women? poor women? all of those groups have different problems and experiences, so we can't just lump them together. (example: slutwalks - these really only help white women because if women of color did these they would get mocked at etc and muslim women cant do these)

 

[Gizmodo]

Surely every woman would consider themselves a feminist though?
i mean no-one would want to be opressed right?
I mean id consider myself one..

 

[Piroshi]

honestly i only see feminists get mad is when people refuse to listen and they cant take it anymore so yeah of course theyre gonna get angry. it would be nice if we could all be nice and help them understand but some refuse to listen. i have calmly helped people with it and some agree with me and understand and the others turn away. so yeah you cant be nice to everyone

but feminism wont get anywhere with just being nice.

I see it all the time. More so with other things than feminism, but I have seen it with feminism. But getting angry at people won't make them listen, especially getting angry at an entire group. Getting angry at specific people because they're being *******s, yeah I can understand that because there's only so much bs you can put up with from one person before you just give up, but I see people blaming men as a group and that's not the way to do it. People don't like generalizations being made about them whether they're true or not, and they're less likely to listen when they see people lumping them in with awful people too. And most people's initial reaction would be "well I'm not like that" and then they're blamed for making it all about them and that they should get some sort of reward, but really they just don't want to be lumped in with terrible people and I can't really blame them for it. I feel like I'm not saying this as well as I can but I have trouble getting all of my thoughts out clearly sometimes.

 

[radical6]

Surely every woman would consider themselves a feminist though?
i mean no-one would want to be opressed right?
I mean id consider myself one..

some women of color dont identify as a feminist but a womanist because feminism has racist roots

I see it all the time. More so with other things than feminism, but I have seen it with feminism. But getting angry at people won't make them listen, especially getting angry at an entire group. Getting angry at specific people because they're being *******s, yeah I can understand that because there's only so much bs you can put up with from one person before you just give up, but I see people blaming men as a group and that's not the way to do it. People don't like generalizations being made about them whether they're true or not, and they're less likely to listen when they see people lumping them in with awful people too. And most people's initial reaction would be "well I'm not like that" and then they're blamed for making it all about them and that they should get some sort of reward, but really they just don't want to be lumped in with terrible people and I can't really blame them for it. I feel like I'm not saying this as well as I can but I have trouble getting all of my thoughts out clearly sometimes.

i know they wont listen if feminists get angry. but what do you expect us to do? after that it mostly turns into an argument. i used to hate feminism and social justice, but after understanding why people were so angry i started to become more interested in feminism and here i am today.

 

[Gizmodo]

I see it all the time. More so with other things than feminism, but I have seen it with feminism. But getting angry at people won't make them listen, especially getting angry at an entire group. Getting angry at specific people because they're being *******s, yeah I can understand that because there's only so much bs you can put up with from one person before you just give up, but I see people blaming men as a group and that's not the way to do it. People don't like generalizations being made about them whether they're true or not, and they're less likely to listen when they see people lumping them in with awful people too. And most people's initial reaction would be "well I'm not like that" and then they're blamed for making it all about them and that they should get some sort of reward, but really they just don't want to be lumped in with terrible people and I can't really blame them for it. I feel like I'm not saying this as well as I can but I have trouble getting all of my thoughts out clearly sometimes.

This

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some women of color dont identify as a feminist but a womanist because feminism has racist roots

Honestly i need to read up on a lot of stuff bc im entering into a whole new world :x

 

[kite]

Honestly i need to read up on a lot of stuff bc im entering into a whole new world :x

lol I agree I thought we were just talking about gender equality

 

[radical6]

Honestly i need to read up on a lot of stuff bc im entering into a whole new world :x

i know some good blogs if you're interested
some people think of feminism as gender equality but i like mine to be more than that. so i guess im an intersectional feminist?