Double Standard of Promiscuity

[jesughs]

In my English class we're starting a new topic in which we create a mini documentary relating events such as the Rwandan Genocide, World War II/Holocaust, the Armenian Genocide, and the Russia/Stalin Conflict (to name a few) to groups of people that are being oppressed in the United States society.

My group chose the topic of sl*t shaming* (sorry for lack of a better term). Our thesis statement is "People should not be singled out for their different beliefs/lifestyles."

Anyways, I made this thread because I wanted to see what all of your thoughts on sl*t shaming were.

*For those who do not know, sl*t shaming (also known as sl*t bashing) is the idea of attacking a woman or girl for being sexual, having one or more sexual partners, acknowledging sexual feelings, and/or acting on sexual feelings. It focuses on making women who choose a promiscuous lifestyle feel inferior.

 

[Jake]

I <3 sluts

I don't see anything wrong with it, it's their lifestyle so let them live it;

However I do feel as it's making feminism useless and pointless (this isn't really relevant but w/e)

Women fought for rights and **** and it just seems people dress like a slut to bypass that and are like 'heheheh if u give me dis job i will suck ur dick' like I just think sluts have turned back feminism like no gurl women fought for hundreds or years for gender equality and you're being a slut like no

 

[jesughs]

However I do feel as it's making feminism useless and pointless (this isn't really relevant but w/e)

Women fought for rights and **** and it just seems people dress like a slut to bypass that and are like 'heheheh if u give me dis job i will suck ur dick' like I just think sluts have turned back feminism like no gurl women fought for hundreds or years for gender equality and you're being a slut like no

I half-agree with you, you have a good point. Women were fighting their oppressive sexually objectified treatment, and now some women are becoming the very sexual objects that their ancestors rebelled against being treated like. I mean, dat's cray-cray. But also, I believe that women have a choice to "respect" their bodies as sexual objects. It's completely their choice. Although I don't agree that that lifestyle is the best, I'll coexist with those who do.

The thing that really gets me mad is when people tell victims of rape that it was their fault and that they were asking for it. As if something could have been done on their part to prevent their own raping. Like no. It's the rapist's fault. Shut up.

 

[Prof Gallows]

Gender is irrelevant. This is something the world has yet to understand.

People, regardless of gender, race, lifestyle choices, and everything else are exactly the same, no matter how you try to look at it.
One person equals one person. No more, no less. The beggar on the street is worth exactly the same as the man in a mansion.

In this case, women are exactly the same as men. If they choose to live a certain way they shouldn't have to put up with people discriminating them and thinking less of them. Nobody should have to feel or put up with being looked down upon for how they live their life.

 

[Kaiaa]

Personally I wouldn't live a promiscuous life but I don't really care if other people do. Just as long as they don't try to flirt with or get in bed with those who already have girl/boyfriends or husbands/wives. I have a promiscuous friend, although they live that kind of lifestyle, it doesn't affect how I live my life so it shouldn't matter how they live theirs in comparison to mine. If it doesn't bother me, they should be able to do what they want, right?

Over the last few years, I've had to open my mind to these kind of things. Being in college has made me learn that all people are not like the people from my tiny town. People are different, but they are still people.

I don't advocate this next paragraph, I just want to tell you what I've learned in class. What do you think about it?:
I've actually taken psychology courses that describe the promiscuous lifestyle as biological. Although its particularly biased to femal promiscuity, the book (I can't recall which one it was) says that when girls physically mature faster than their other female peers, they tend to look for relationships with older boys. Lets say...a 7th grader who is dating a Junior (very weird in my opinion, but this happens). After the inevitable breakup, the female unconsciously tends to look for that comfort that that boy gave her in her time of ridicule (her peers making fun of her for developing early) in any male she things she has a chance with. Then there is this theory: This early stress on the body does something to her and makes her promiscuous to ensure offspring. This is due to the stress that many females felt back before modern civilization. Girls who developed fast needed to find a mate fast in order to further the population of mankind.

Of course, that's what the book said. You can interpret what people do in your own way. Keep in mind that not everything is so black and white; not all promiscuous people do it for the sake of sex.

 

[Kaiaa]

The thing that really gets me mad is when people tell victims of rape that it was their fault and that they were asking for it. As if something could have been done on their part to prevent their own raping. Like no. It's the rapist's fault. Shut up.

Yeah I'm making a double post, I know, I know.

This irks me right here. This is called hindsight bias. "I/You should have done this instead...." "I/You shouldn't have done...." This is putting the blame in the wrong place.
I hear a lot of people say that "If you didn't wear those clothes, you wouldn't have been raped." That's funny because people don't care what you wear when they rape.

Yes, if you dress skimpily you will be turning some men on. HOWEVER, it is not your fault if they cannot control themselves. Anyone can be a victim, whether you are big, small, tall, short, young, old, loud, quiet,.....you get my point.

~~~~~~
Here is food for thought, women can rape men. You just don't hear about it because in our society, rape on women is traumatic but rape on men is just "embarrassing". That's why you rarely hear about it, cause the man doesn't want to admit it.

 

[Princess]

Gender is irrelevant. This is something the world has yet to understand.

People, regardless of gender, race, lifestyle choices, and everything else are exactly the same, no matter how you try to look at it.
One person equals one person. No more, no less. The beggar on the street is worth exactly the same as the man in a mansion.

In this case, women are exactly the same as men. If they choose to live a certain way they shouldn't have to put up with people discriminating them and thinking less of them. Nobody should have to feel or put up with being looked down upon for how they live their life.

Basically this.

It's unfortunate how so many women are subjected to being blamed when they're the victim. Not just in the case of rape, women are constantly pointed at for being "too *****y", "dressing too provocatively", "not provocatively enough" etc.

Last I checked it's 2013. Why is gender still such a huge factor in society?

 

[Stevey Queen]

I could care less about sluts. In fact, I wouldn't even call them sluts for sleeping with a bunch of men. Or women. Its when they start sleeping with people's boysfriends is when they become a slut. In my eyes.

 

[Officer Berri]

I sometimes think about this and am somewhat bemused when I realize that there's really no way for a man to dress where anyone would straight up call him 'slutty'. A man can take off his shirt wherever he wants and everyone's cool with it. A woman wears something slightly more revealing than normal? All the colorful language and insults come out of hiding. I've heard my mother use the term 'man-whore' once or twice, but I don't really remember why she said it. |:

I get so angry when they blame the way a woman dresses as to why she was raped. Here's a great idea: How about you punish the dude who raped her instead of slapping her on the wrist and going "Maybe if you conform and be like the rest of us other men won't have to 'punish' you by raping you?"

 

[jesughs]

Gender is irrelevant. This is something the world has yet to understand.

People, regardless of gender, race, lifestyle choices, and everything else are exactly the same, no matter how you try to look at it.
One person equals one person. No more, no less. The beggar on the street is worth exactly the same as the man in a mansion.

In this case, women are exactly the same as men. If they choose to live a certain way they shouldn't have to put up with people discriminating them and thinking less of them. Nobody should have to feel or put up with being looked down upon for how they live their life.

This is just great. I've never thought about gender that way, but it makes perfect sense.

Here's a great idea: How about you punish the dude who raped her instead of slapping her on the wrist and going "Maybe if you conform and be like the rest of us other men won't have to 'punish' you by raping you?"

This.

The thing that people need to get over is that some people do not have the same morals as others. Have you heard of Good Shepherd Laundries? Or Magdalene Asylums? These were made to punish promiscuous women and girls by forcing them to serve penance. It's crazy because in America, some of the Good Shepherd Laundries are still in business and nobody's doing anything about it.

 

[Bacon Boy]

I don't agree with the lifestyle. There are a few girls at my school, yes, my Christian prep school (Surprise! Not everyone there is a Christian!) that are like that. One in particular, is an example of what everyone is talking about, with looking for relationships with older men and such. However, she has feelings. When her grandma went into a coma and died, guess what? She was upset and crying about it. Like a human. People's choices don't define them. Most of this stuff can be traced psychologically, as well, but that's another discussion for another time. I'm willing to look past what a person does and would rather look at their heart. That's what really matters. There are no such things as lost causes.

I also find it downright frustrating about the rape blame-game. It irks me to think that there are people that will stick up for those kinds of people. There's no excuse for rape. It's not the woman's fault, it's the man's. Anyone that says otherwise needs to be shot along with the rapists. Notice how it's mostly men or the uptight, stuck-up, holier-than-thou "Christian" women that try to stick up for them.

 

[Dustbunnii]

While I don't agree with the lifestyle, I'm not going to judge a person for being a part of it. They're human just like everyone else.
And while I do think that what a woman wears and how she acts can lead a man to think she's "wants it", if she's saying 'no' or 'stop', then the blame is on the man. There's no excuse. Not that the blame would be on the woman if she couldn't or didn't say no for whatever reason... not saying that clothes and behaviors are the only reasons why they get raped either, because they definitely aren't.

Also
I literally was just ranting about the fact that men can be raped as a comment to a picture that someone posted on facebook.
this picture actually.

 

[jesughs]

One in particular, is an example of what everyone is talking about, with looking for relationships with older men and such. However, she has feelings. When her grandma went into a coma and died, guess what? She was upset and crying about it. Like a human. People's choices don't define them.

This is pretty much a legitimate argument against the oppression of any group of people. I wish people would understand that we're all human. Whether you're a prostitute or even a Satanist, we are all the same.

Also
I literally was just ranting about the fact that men can be raped as a comment to a picture that someone posted on facebook.
this picture actually.

Wow.
That picture makes me so angry I can't even...
The 3rd ask especially makes me mad. It's like they're saying that rape is a suitable punishment for simply "pissing someone off".
And also, male victims of rape weren't all raped by women. Males can rape males too. Some consider gay sex not a legitimate form of intercourse, but in our society today I believe that it is. Tell me what Jerry Sanduski was in trouble for? Rape. "But... he's a boy and his victims were little boys... that can't be rape!" Ugh.

 

[Prof Gallows]

Hm. It's small minded people like the ones in the picture that make the world a bad place to live in. Not that everything in the world is bad, but those people are a prime example of the amount of stupidity there is.

It's impossible for them to put themselves in someone else's shoes because they've never had to deal with a serious crisis, which makes them think they are better than anyone who has. And discriminating him because he's a male and trying to put the blame on him because they think women aren't capable of anything like that. It's a shame, it really is, that there are people like that out there who can blame someone for something that they had done to them.

 

[oath2order]

This is pretty much a legitimate argument against the oppression of any group of people. I wish people would understand that we're all human. Whether you're a prostitute or even a Satanist, we are all the same.



Wow.
That picture makes me so angry I can't even...
The 3rd ask especially makes me mad. It's like they're saying that rape is a suitable punishment for simply "pissing someone off".
And also, male victims of rape weren't all raped by women. Males can rape males too. Some consider gay sex not a legitimate form of intercourse, but in our society today I believe that it is. Tell me what Jerry Sanduski was in trouble for? Rape. "But... he's a boy and his victims were little boys... that can't be rape!" Ugh.

Or, you know, the whole prison thing. I mean, it's practically a joke. Soap on a rope and all that.

If people don't consider gay sex a legitimate form of intercourse, then I guess they don't consider those actions being performed on a woman against her will as rape then?

 

[Prof Gallows]

Or, you know, the whole prison thing. I mean, it's practically a joke. Soap on a rope and all that.

If people don't consider gay sex a legitimate form of intercourse, then I guess they don't consider those actions being performed on a woman against her will as rape then?

Some states in the US don't consider sodomy as rape, even if that's obviously what happened. =/

 

[oath2order]

Some states in the US don't consider sodomy as rape, even if that's obviously what happened. =/

Yeah, there was something in the news about that recently. I don't remember what it was.

 

[Prof Gallows]

Yeah, there was something in the news about that recently. I don't remember what it was.

Was it this?

 

[Kaiaa]

Also
I literally was just ranting about the fact that men can be raped as a comment to a picture that someone posted on facebook.
this picture actually.

Wow I don't even think I have words for how much that pisses me off.

Okay so this is kind of a different topic here but in a roundabout way it works so...I'm going to bring it up anyway. Feminism.
I am a woman but that doesn't mean I'm feminist. Actually, I think the entirety of feminism is bull **** except for the part that women should be considered equal to men (in that they can make their own decisions/get paid the same for the same exact work).
I'm not outright saying its true, but I bet a lot of those posters were women and have high respects for women. If that is so and they see that men and women were created equally, than why are they saying that women are too weak to rape or don't have the capability to rape like a man?

Basically that would be hypocritical to the notion of feminism/equality for men and women. Why say that anything a man can do, a woman can do also....except when it comes to something bad? So I guess women aren't capable of murder either right? No, anyone can and if they are messed up enough, will be likely to do something like rape.

Spoiler: Mature readers please. If you are offended easily, please don't read.

Men can get turned on whether they want to or not. They are not the hounds that we make them out to be. Women too can get turned on whether they want to or not. It's called biology. When your body finds someone attractive or believes that it needs to prepare for sex, its going to get ready. You know how guys can spike a girls drink than have his way? Well guess what. Girls have that ability too. If you want to say that men are monsters like that you have to believe that women are too. Of course, not everyone is like that. You are a pretty ****ed up person to do this.

Juicebox has correct me, the feminism I am speaking of is "straw feminism", not real feminism.

 

[D1llon]

Oh Hell no.

Slut shaming is a completely correct consequence for having premarital sex (especially in high school).

Disclaimer: I'm not sure on my opinion of premarital sex, but during middle/high school it should not be happening.

Life would be so much simpler if people weren't having free sex. STDs wouldn't be spread as fast, and the drama/duress of people having sex and intertwined feelings would be eradicated. Also treating sex as something sacred and the body as a temple makes sex with someone you love more special. If any of you had sex in high school, were your desires really that bad whee you couldn't control yourself?

Anyway, sluts devalue sex. Still, women do get blamed for having more than men, which I'm okay with because I hate promiscuity. Someone should be blamed for it.

But I'm also a feminist. I don't believe that men should put themselves superior to women and use them for simple pleasures such as sex. But if a woman is too stupid to recognize this for herself then she should be shut out. If there weren't seductive-basic woman out there, these men wouldn't exist in my opinion. Like great women- Sojourner Truth, Elizabeth Cady Stanton, Mary Wollenstonecraft- did not fight their inferiority for hundreds of years so women could go back to roles pleasing men.

But what if these women are enjoying having sex? Isn't empowering for women? Not at all. There is not a single expression of genius from such people. These women dedicate their time to their sugar daddies or pleasing the men around them instead of pleasing themselves and allowing them to create new pieces of art or ideas or machines. For real, what is genius about saying "I love my boyfriend so much, I'd die without him!" That is complete dependency.

And although this isn't the issue, your thesis is ****.