I wish my depression had a physical form

[dr_shrunk]

so I could beat it into a bloody mess...

because I hate it, and I want it too go away
I really want it gone I hate feeling this way, I want to talk
to someone so bad but I can never bring myself to talk to
anyone when I get in these kinds of moods and it sucks since'
not talking to others makes me even more depressed but ever
since My best friend left me because I was depressed and told me
I was too boring and she no longer wanted to talk to me anymore.
I just can;t do it, I don't want another friend to leave just because of my negative behavior,


also as for that "friend" maybe if she actually talked to me and didn't ignore me then maybe I wouldn't have been so damn depressed and maybe if she talked to me and actually tried to help me the depression would have been shorter but nope she choose to ignore me and not talk to me, Talking to her always made me smile and laugh, we didn't have to talk about my issues all I wanted to do was to be able to just enjoy being friends and having silly convos and maybe talk on the phone like we always did....I miss those days so much
I wish I could have them back


but I know that is impossible so why bother wishing..I hate getting attached to others so easily. and being diagnosed with Dependent personality disorder doesn't help at all.


..I feel so emotional sick, I don't want to do anything at all
not even eat, I haven't eaten in 4 days
I just want to lay down, that's all I want to do.​

 

[marzipanmermaid]

I struggle with depression too. If you ever need someone to talk to, I'm just a PM away. I related to this post too much and I hate knowing someone is feeling as bad.

 

[Neriifur]

I've had PTSD since I was 6 years old. Mental disorders are really hard, but they -do- get better over time. You'll eventually find a way a way to live with them, and even though you may still have them, you'll end up noticing them a lot less to where it doesn't really impact your life so much anymore. Don't worry, you're not alone I noticed venting does make me feel better. I've gotten to the point where I just talk about my issues like this anywhere when I used to feel too shy and uncomfortable to talk about them.. and it's helped a lot.

I lost my best friend in 2009. I feel like she died instead of just not talking to me anymore. I've lost many relationships, many friends, and have been fired from countless jobs due to having PTSD. I'm harshly judged a lot due to it. It's sometimes hard for me to keep friends, because a lot of people seemingly get tired of me, or they find something wrong with me. I don't even know. Almost every guy I've been with has dumped me, because I'm abnormal.

'Tis the life Just saying I can relate. It'll get better though, trust me!