I just made a super long blog entry about how I basically don't like who I've become. There was a time when I was comfortable with who I was, but not anymore.
Does anyone else feel the same way?
Does anyone else feel the same way?
Anyone else can't seem to accept themselves for who they are?
- Thread starter xSuperMario64x
- Start date
ME. I HATE MYSELF.
I wish I was more social irl, I hate being so shy and so weak. If I was stronger, I would have friends, and could be more social outside. I wouldn't need my dad for everything when I go out to eat or shop. It's embarrassing, people at my age go out alone and shop.
I wish my face wasn't so ugly too. Whenever I look in the mirror, I see ugliness. I wish I was a girl who is beautiful and thinks they're ugly, would be much better than this.
Also don't like how I'm good at nothing.
Please, can I switch lives with someone?
I wish I was more social irl, I hate being so shy and so weak. If I was stronger, I would have friends, and could be more social outside. I wouldn't need my dad for everything when I go out to eat or shop. It's embarrassing, people at my age go out alone and shop.
I wish my face wasn't so ugly too. Whenever I look in the mirror, I see ugliness. I wish I was a girl who is beautiful and thinks they're ugly, would be much better than this.
Also don't like how I'm good at nothing.
Please, can I switch lives with someone?
Midna64
𝓣𝓱𝓮 𝓢𝓽𝓪𝓻𝓼 𝓐𝓻𝓮 𝓕𝓪𝓵𝓵𝓲𝓷𝓰
I used to not like who I was before but I then came to accept that this is who l am and I should be proud. I am shy and pretty awkward with people but I looked deep inside of me to see what I really wanted to do with my life and I found out that I really liked acting so I started doing it and it for me changed everything. I became less shy and more social. (But I'm still awkward and weird with people sometimes)
I think people don't like themselves for who they are because they don't try hard enough. Many people say "I don't have any talents" Or " I'm bad at everything" Do you even try to find any of your talents? I mean I was very shy when I first started acting but I didn't give up because I knew that I really wanted to do it. And if you tried something don't like it then it's ok. People shouldn't be scared to try new things (unless it's dangerous or it's something they are really uncomfortable with) but you should be scared of not trying.
CuriousCharli
Bunnie's Shmoopy
Yes and no. I hate myself but i've come to terms with who and how i am. I think that's all anyone should ask for. Like You're (not you personally) trash but you know you're trash so its okay.
I think low of myself all the time but i also admire and consider myself a warrior for always getting back up or bouncing back after everything i have been through.
I also believe i am kinda pretty, not beautiful. I will either say i'm ugly 90% of the time or that i am pretty. NEVER beautiful. If someone says i'm beautiful i "shut that sh** down" - Negan. The only thing i really think is beautiful about myself is my eyes, i really love my eye colour. That's it, scrap the rest, RESTART.
100 Ways To Hate - FFDP literally springs to mind "Hate your face hate your lies hate the way you did your eyes hate your needs hate your wants hate the way you learnt to talk hate your voice makes me cringe everytime i hear you speak..."
Edit: I like helping people it gives me a reason to live and makes me feel better about myself but i also know my true reason is a selfish reason and that is to prove to myself that i can be a good person.
I think low of myself all the time but i also admire and consider myself a warrior for always getting back up or bouncing back after everything i have been through.
I also believe i am kinda pretty, not beautiful. I will either say i'm ugly 90% of the time or that i am pretty. NEVER beautiful. If someone says i'm beautiful i "shut that sh** down" - Negan. The only thing i really think is beautiful about myself is my eyes, i really love my eye colour. That's it, scrap the rest, RESTART.
100 Ways To Hate - FFDP literally springs to mind "Hate your face hate your lies hate the way you did your eyes hate your needs hate your wants hate the way you learnt to talk hate your voice makes me cringe everytime i hear you speak..."
Edit: I like helping people it gives me a reason to live and makes me feel better about myself but i also know my true reason is a selfish reason and that is to prove to myself that i can be a good person.
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I know that feeling. Ive struggled, and still do struggle getting back to the old me. I am getting there.
A few years ago I got myself into an incredibly toxic workplace. I had zero support, and no matter what I did my supervisor made me feel like I was beneath her. If I started doing something well, she would change the rules, then condone me and tell me I am doing them wrong. I became severely depressed, and developed dehabilitating anxiety.
After several sessions of therapy, getting on the right medication, I took a low stress job. Emotionally and mentally I got better.
However, I still find myself struggling. I use to be so confident in my work, and still today I panic when I have a 15 minute conversation with my supervisor. Even today, I asked a colleague to help me and I felt guilty because I didn't do it - to almost a point of hyperventilation.
Once I started the variety of medication, my eating became out of control. I was always tiny, closers to underweight than normal weight. Over those 2 years, I put on a lot of weight, and I could hardly look at myself. The biggest acceptance was it's okay to be in that "normal" range of weight, and a few pounds isn't going to kill me.
It changed me, and I lost who I was. I did not like who I became and I knew if I wanted to be happy I need to focus on myself.
I am getting better, I'm trying so hard to look after myself. I have a boss that is supportive and caring, and surround myself with people that care about me. I try to exercise daily, to help the internal battle of my healthy weight, and for the benefits on mental health. I eat well, and try to get my sleep.
What everyone has to remember is its the little wins are just as important as the big wins. And that only you have the capability to change yourself.
A few years ago I got myself into an incredibly toxic workplace. I had zero support, and no matter what I did my supervisor made me feel like I was beneath her. If I started doing something well, she would change the rules, then condone me and tell me I am doing them wrong. I became severely depressed, and developed dehabilitating anxiety.
After several sessions of therapy, getting on the right medication, I took a low stress job. Emotionally and mentally I got better.
However, I still find myself struggling. I use to be so confident in my work, and still today I panic when I have a 15 minute conversation with my supervisor. Even today, I asked a colleague to help me and I felt guilty because I didn't do it - to almost a point of hyperventilation.
Once I started the variety of medication, my eating became out of control. I was always tiny, closers to underweight than normal weight. Over those 2 years, I put on a lot of weight, and I could hardly look at myself. The biggest acceptance was it's okay to be in that "normal" range of weight, and a few pounds isn't going to kill me.
It changed me, and I lost who I was. I did not like who I became and I knew if I wanted to be happy I need to focus on myself.
I am getting better, I'm trying so hard to look after myself. I have a boss that is supportive and caring, and surround myself with people that care about me. I try to exercise daily, to help the internal battle of my healthy weight, and for the benefits on mental health. I eat well, and try to get my sleep.
What everyone has to remember is its the little wins are just as important as the big wins. And that only you have the capability to change yourself.
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Midna64
𝓣𝓱𝓮 𝓢𝓽𝓪𝓻𝓼 𝓐𝓻𝓮 𝓕𝓪𝓵𝓵𝓲𝓷𝓰
"You will never become strong if you are never weak." If you are shy then bring yourself out there. If you are not happy with yourself then why keep complaining. Complaining won't do anything so do something! If you don't know what to do well let me tell you something....No one knows what to do...even if they say they do, they don't because you, me and everyone else are the same: we can never tell what to expect in the future.
Dawnpiplup
Kick ass.
Me. Like you, there once was a time when I was comfortable with who I was...that was quite long ago. Back then, I didn't really care much about what people might've thought or said about me. I just focused on school, and did my best. Now, I'm completely different. I'm not as confident as I used to be, I'm insecure, and I'm simply just not trying my hardest in school due to me worrying about my classmates' opinion about me. I hope I can change, and be who I was many years ago.
primandimproper
Transgender Trainwreck
I absolutely cannot stand who I am, and I hate to say this, but it's because I care too much about what people think and take everything they say to heart. I, literally, do not how to not care about what people think or say about me, and even when I ask people to explain how they don't care, I still don't get it.
Most of the time, I laugh it off, but it gets harder when you hear the same things over and over again. And, even though, I know those things were said out of bitterness and anger and that they aren't true, I still let them get to me and I am repulsed by who I am.
I hate that I keep making the same mistakes over and over again. I hate that the instant I find any sort of confidence in myself, I throw it out the freaking window so I can be the perfect, obedient, girl-who-you-take-home-to-your-mom girlfriend to a guy I know isn't really right for me in a relationship that I hold onto because of one, single shared interest despite a million difference and the unshakeable fact that we have nothing in common. And I hate that I'm so weak that I still care about what he thinks about me, even after he made it clear that I am nothing and will probably always be nothing.
So, no, you aren't alone and you're definitely not the only person who hates who they are.
Most of the time, I laugh it off, but it gets harder when you hear the same things over and over again. And, even though, I know those things were said out of bitterness and anger and that they aren't true, I still let them get to me and I am repulsed by who I am.
I hate that I keep making the same mistakes over and over again. I hate that the instant I find any sort of confidence in myself, I throw it out the freaking window so I can be the perfect, obedient, girl-who-you-take-home-to-your-mom girlfriend to a guy I know isn't really right for me in a relationship that I hold onto because of one, single shared interest despite a million difference and the unshakeable fact that we have nothing in common. And I hate that I'm so weak that I still care about what he thinks about me, even after he made it clear that I am nothing and will probably always be nothing.
So, no, you aren't alone and you're definitely not the only person who hates who they are.
pinkcotton
Pray For The Wicked
Stop hating yourself for everything you aren't and start loving yourself for everything you already are.
visibleghost
ʕ •̀ o •́ ʔ
im great at self hatred
My blog entry pretty much explains my issue. I know my strengths and my talemts, but after doing schoolwork every day 16 hours a day for about 2-3 years you get really burned out on it. Like really burned out. It's literally made me think of only what others want and not what I want at all. I've basically become, as I put it in my blog, a slave to my school and a slave to others. I don't feel the need to please people but it's like I'm obligated to, especially when it comes to schoolwork.
So yeah, I don't like where my life is rn. And being in college... Idk if it'll change anything.
I have kind of a similar problem. Last year, I was a big mess. I would constantly self harm, dress in black with excessive black eye makeup, constantly cry myself to sleep, and all in all, I was set in a terrible mindset.
I was irritable to the people I loved, and being arrogant was just part of my personality. I was so set in hating myself that I couldn't see what was happening around me.
Then, I met my boyfriend: he made me feel like there was more to life. I started letting go of all my hatred towards myself, and behaving more appropriately. Although he hasn't fully changed me to be positive all the time, he's definitely brightened up my life along with opening my eyes; less naive.
Though because I've tried to be more positive, trying to just ignore all the bad, I've noticed reasons to actually be upset. Real reasons, such as failing relationships between family, abusive relationships, being 'homesick' though not missing home, but missing anything but home. Trying to be positive slowly gets harder every day, since I can't ignore what's going on around me.
I feel although I'm technically a 'better person' I miss who I used to be. I sometimes catch myself wishing that maybe, just maybe I could be that mess again, just so I don't have to deal with anything real.
I was irritable to the people I loved, and being arrogant was just part of my personality. I was so set in hating myself that I couldn't see what was happening around me.
Then, I met my boyfriend: he made me feel like there was more to life. I started letting go of all my hatred towards myself, and behaving more appropriately. Although he hasn't fully changed me to be positive all the time, he's definitely brightened up my life along with opening my eyes; less naive.
Though because I've tried to be more positive, trying to just ignore all the bad, I've noticed reasons to actually be upset. Real reasons, such as failing relationships between family, abusive relationships, being 'homesick' though not missing home, but missing anything but home. Trying to be positive slowly gets harder every day, since I can't ignore what's going on around me.
I feel although I'm technically a 'better person' I miss who I used to be. I sometimes catch myself wishing that maybe, just maybe I could be that mess again, just so I don't have to deal with anything real.
visibleghost
ʕ •̀ o •́ ʔ
oh god what kind of school do you go to uhjhhhh that sounds like hell??????
Oh yeah, easy-peasy.
Quoted for the truth.
It was hell. I loved my school, but jfc I had to work like constantly to get good grades in all my classes. At least now in college I'm doing work that I actually enjoy but it's still a big time consumer.
I was actually worked so hard in HS that over this summer I've been nothing but depressed. I honestly feel like I didn't even have a summer vacation. I feel like I graduated from HS and two weeks later I'm in college. It's terrible.
wow thanks, im cured
tifachu
。*・゜☆・ ゜✧・。 • ・
I used to feel the same way, all the time, especially during my middle-school & early high school years. While i felt it about both my appearance & personality, I really took things out on my appearance.
My parents were strict, didn't let me go out much, and were against changing my appearance and such. My self-hatred was harmful to myself physically and mentally. I even took down all old school photos my mother liked to frame and hang up, and stowed them away under my desk. and would avoid looking in mirrors in bathrooms. because i hated seeing myself >.< when i got my hair cut (from mid-back length to shoulder/neck-length) I had actually wanted a sort of pixie cut, but my mom was like "eww like Miley Cyrus?" (back when everyone was shocked of her becoming more.. provocative) so i eventually started cutting it shorter and shorter over time on my own.
And then played with makeup, even bleached my bangs blonde and eventually colored them pink, and eventually my whole head pink. I also pierced my lips 4 times o v o my mom was so upset at me, but changing my appearance on my own terms helped me to feel more comfortable in my own skin, and become more confident & care-free personality-wise. Of course, I still feel bad about myself on some things, like weight or how shy/quiet/anxious I am, but there are some things can't really be changed and we have to accept about ourselves. c: I used to feel so bad about how shy I am, and would get teased, but now I don't care, it is one of the defining characteristics that make me me. The same can be applied to any trait we have or struggle with, and anyone who doesn't like it or thinks its weird doesn't matter, what truly matters is how we think of & treat ourselves & the steps we take to change.
My parents were strict, didn't let me go out much, and were against changing my appearance and such. My self-hatred was harmful to myself physically and mentally. I even took down all old school photos my mother liked to frame and hang up, and stowed them away under my desk. and would avoid looking in mirrors in bathrooms. because i hated seeing myself >.< when i got my hair cut (from mid-back length to shoulder/neck-length) I had actually wanted a sort of pixie cut, but my mom was like "eww like Miley Cyrus?" (back when everyone was shocked of her becoming more.. provocative) so i eventually started cutting it shorter and shorter over time on my own.
And then played with makeup, even bleached my bangs blonde and eventually colored them pink, and eventually my whole head pink. I also pierced my lips 4 times o v o my mom was so upset at me, but changing my appearance on my own terms helped me to feel more comfortable in my own skin, and become more confident & care-free personality-wise. Of course, I still feel bad about myself on some things, like weight or how shy/quiet/anxious I am, but there are some things can't really be changed and we have to accept about ourselves. c: I used to feel so bad about how shy I am, and would get teased, but now I don't care, it is one of the defining characteristics that make me me. The same can be applied to any trait we have or struggle with, and anyone who doesn't like it or thinks its weird doesn't matter, what truly matters is how we think of & treat ourselves & the steps we take to change.
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