say something positive turn something negative

"Tomatine is also toxic but less so. However, when ingested in extremely large doses, it may cause gastrointestinal problems, liver and even heart damage. It is highest in concentration in the leaves, stems and unripe fruit; "

Soft toilet paper
 
Its too soft and it rips whenever you need it and you're stuck with it..forever

To have "plot armor" till your natural death
 
You bumped once again it fills you with determination

The powers of all the sea
 
Are wonderful ( yes its a good thing git over it )

To be IN the minecraft universe ( becuase why not )
 
Everyone treats you bad because your not "edgy" enough (EHEHHEHE GET IT?)

Your dog can talk
 
Your dog can only talk trash which scares away guests friends loved ones etc etc..

To make water slides appear anywhere
 
Do you want to know who else bumps threads?[video]https://s.yimg.com/lo/api/res/1.2/epuyR_0JfGVNhulvBLkOpA--~A/YXBwaWQ9eWlzZWFyY2g7Zmk9Zml0O2dlPTAwNjYwMDtncz0wME EzMDA7aD0yODE7dz01MDA-/http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m0lv9khaOv1qbmajao1_500.gif.cf.gif[/video]


To turn into liquids
 
your heart ends up failing due to your overdose of stanozolol

being able to communicate with my kitty cat
 
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You have a weak heart and hearing your Kat's potty mouthing took you over the edge

To own every gaming console, top notch gaming PC and every game to date and every game after appearing in the tini bigger-on-the-inside box
 
You spend so much time doing everything you can that you forget to sleep, refuse to sleep, and get so into the cycle of spending the entirety of your day playing video games that your body literally rejects all sleep and you die a painful death.

The ability to summon your waifu at will?
 
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