Page 310 of 564 FirstFirst ... 210260300308309310311312320360410 ... LastLast
Results 3,091 to 3,100 of 5632

Thread: ☞ !The Miscellaneous! ☜

  1. #3091
    I hate pears
    Join Date
    September 22, 2013
    Posts
    5,836
    Bells
    2
    Eggs
    0
    3DS
    2766-8783-3800
    Items: Yellow Candy
Gift received at 01-13-2017, 03:54 PM from UniversaljellyfishGreen Candy
Gift received at 10-29-2016, 08:59 PM from UniversaljellyfishThe Bell Tree Fair 2014 PatchThe Bell Tree Fair 2013 Patch
    Quote Originally Posted by Ash Q. Scrumfleton View Post
    I used to love getting together with people on ACNL. Lost all my friends though, I really miss it.
    I do too, I used to have heaps of online friends I'd play with all the time. But I guess we just all forgot about acnl and grew apart.
    Last edited by B e t h a n y; 03-20-2017 at 06:30 PM.

  2. #3092
    Get over here ya fatty xSuperMario64x's Avatar
    Join Date
    October 30, 2011
    Posts
    1,637
    Bells
    24
    Eggs
    0
    3DS
    3024-6610-7931
    NN ID
    norwegiancat99
    Items: FleaWhite Lily
Gift received at 01-04-2017, 04:48 PM from Flare
Message: in: Encyclopedia SpongeBobia 
Pizza Delivery (transcript)

 Arrow Left.png
Episode
Transcript
Gallery
 Arrow Right.png
Transcript Information [edit]
 
General
Season №:	1
Episode №:	5a
This article is a transcript of the SpongeBob SquarePants episode "Pizza Delivery" from season one, which aired on August 14, 1999.

Squidward: [Scene starts at the Krusty Krab with SpongeBob cleaning a table] Hurry up with those chairs, SpongeBob, it's after closing and I'd like to go home.
[phone rings]
SpongeBob: I got it, I got it! Coming. [leaps for the phone but Squidward answers it first]
Squidward: Hello? Sorry, sir, we're close... [Mr. Krabs snatches phone]
Mr. Krabs: Ahoy, there, Krusty Krab. How could I help you? [customer explains order over phone] Pizza? [eyes turn into dollar signs] Um... Of course we have pizza.
Squidward: Uhh, Mr. Krabs...
Mr. Krabs: Our delivery Squid will bring it right over. [hangs up]
Squidward: Mr. Krabs, we don't serve pizza. [Mr. Krabs gets a plate of Krabby patties and turns it into pizza. Then he puts it in a box] We don't deliver.
Mr. Krabs: We don't deliver, but you do.
Squidward: Can't you just get SpongeBob to do it?
Mr. Krabs: Great idea! Take him with you. [SpongeBob sneaks over smiling big]
Squidward: That's not what I had in mind!
SpongeBob: Front end... check. Antenna... [touches the boat antenna making it vibrate] check. Bumper... check. Bumper sticker... [bumper sticker says "I Brake For Sea Urchins"] ...check. [uncaps the tire pressure and puts his mouth in it, causing him to inflate like a balloon, and talk in a squeaky, high pitched voice while he is now the size of a giant parade balloon] Tire pressure! [blows out the rest of the pressure in Squidward's face, returning him to his normal size and voice] ...check. Vehicle inspection complete! We're really making history here Squidward. That lucky customer is going to get the first Krabby Patty Pizza ever.
Squidward: Good, then you drive.
SpongeBob: I can't. I'm still in Boating School.
Squidward: Come on, SpongeBob. Its just around the corner.
SpongeBob: Well, yeah, but...
Squidward: Just do what you do in school.
SpongeBob: Well, okay. Wait, don't tell me.
Squidward: Back it up.
SpongeBob: What?
Squidward: Back... it up.
SpongeBob: Right, back... it up. [tries to move the stick shift down]
Squidward: Back it up!
SpongeBob: Okay, okay.
Squidward: Shift into reverse, SpongeBob!
SpongeBob: Reverse? Oh, yeah, reverse. [SpongeBob imagines the words "FORWARD" and "BACKWARD" turning into Korean characters, 앞으로가 (FORWARD) and 뒤로가 (BACKWARD)]
Squidward: Back it up!!
SpongeBob: [shifts gears] Backing up! Backing up! [boat backs up really fast]
Squidward: [tries to get the wheel] NO! SpongeBob! You did it wrong! Gimme the wheel, SpongeBob. Give me the wheel! Give me it!
SpongeBob: Backing up! Backing up! Ba-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-ack-i-i-i-i-i-ng up! [they go over a bumpy area with rocks and then they spin around and around and around, screaming. The next morning, the boat goes over five hills] Backing up. Backing up. Backing up. Backing up. [boat stops with no fuel left]
Squidward: Well... you backed up. And you know what? I think were out of gas. And you know what else? [echoing] We're in the middle of nowhere!
SpongeBob: And you know what else else? I think the pizzas getting cold.
Squidward: And the pizza's cold? Oh, the pizza's cold. Not the pizza! Oh, how could it get any worse? [kicks boat and the boat starts up again and goes forward fast back to the Krusty Krab]
SpongeBob: Well, we can still deliver it on foot. [both walk on the sand]
Squidward: Ow, ow ow.
SpongeBob: [singing] The Krusty Krab pizza is the pizza for you and me. The Krusty Krab pizza is the pizza...
Squidward: ...And my feet are killing me. Whoa. [trips over SpongeBob] SpongeBob? What are you doing?
SpongeBob: [rubbing ground] Its an old pioneer trick. I saw it in a movie once.
Squidward: SpongeBob, this is no time for...
SpongeBob: Shh, shh, shh. It's working.
Squidward: What is it?
SpongeBob: [pointing to the road] Truck! 16 wheels. Now I can show you how the pioneers hitchhiked. [starts dancing in the road] Whee... eee...
Truck Driver: Crashin' frashin' break dancers!
Squidward: He's stopping! He's stopping! [Squidward realizes he's not stopping and grabs SpongeBob out of the way where they are covered in sand thanks to the truck]
SpongeBob: The Krusty Krab pizza is the pizza for you and me. The Krusty Krab pizza is the pizza free delivery. The Krusty Krab pizza is the pizza very ta-asty. [SpongeBob gets carried around in the air by the huge winds]
Squidward: Will you let go of that stupid pizza, already?!
SpongeBob: I can't, its for the customer!
Squidward: Well Who cares about the customer?!
SpongeBob: I do!
Squidward: Well, I don't!
SpongeBob: [wind stops and SpongeBob gasps] Squidward! [starts flying again]
Squidward: Let go of that pizza!
SpongeBob: No! [runs over Squidward]
Squidward: Ow. [holding SpongeBob's legs] SpongeBob, let go of that pizza!
SpongeBob: No! Its for the customer!
Squidward: SpongeBob! Let go of the pizza! [lifts up into the tornado]
SpongeBob: No!
Squidward: SpongeBob! [looks down] Hang onto the pizza! [tornado spits them both out. SpongeBob uses the pizza as a parachute but Squidward falls hard onto the ground] Hey! Hey! [crawls up to the screen] Wheres the road? Where's the road? We're doomed! How are we gonna get home, which way do we go? [SpongeBob lands] What are we gonna do now! There's no road here!
SpongeBob: I think town's this way. [points]
Squidward: Oh, don't tell me, Jethro. The pioneers?
SpongeBob: That's right. Moss always points to civilization.
Squidward: That way? That way there? [SpongeBob nods] So, let me get this straight... you think that we should go that way?
SpongeBob: Yep.
Squidward: Well, then I'm going this way. [heads the other way]
SpongeBob: Huh? Squid, wait! I don't think...
Squidward: Trust me, I know where I'm going. [Pans out to show another city in the other direction]
SpongeBob: [sings] The Krusty Krab pizza absolutivally. [later] pizza... [starts beatboxing] pizza... [later, SpongeBob is walking backwards. SpongeBob's pants almost split into two and move up and down simultaneously while he continues to beatbox. Still later] Krusty Krab pizza is the pizza, yeah, for you and [falsetto] me! [later] Krab Pizza... for you. Krus... the Krusshy and the... Krab and the... pizza inside. [Later, they are both lying face down in the sand]
Squidward: Sponge, we gotta eat something.
SpongeBob: I heard in times of hardship, the pioneers would eat coral. [Squidward eats some coral] No, maybe it wasn't coral. [Squidward spits out the coral] Maybe it was sand, no, no, mud.
Squidward: Give me the pizza!
SpongeBob: Wait, I remember now. It was coral!
Squidward: Give it to me!
SpongeBob: No, we promised it's for the customer.
Squidward: [fancy music plays] You're right. It's for the customer.
SpongeBob: Yeah!
Squidward: Maybe we better check on it, make sure its okay.
SpongeBob: Well?
Squidward: Just a peek. [opens box]
SpongeBob: [he shuts it quickly] Okay, its fine.
Squidward: No, I think I saw something. [opens box] Oh, no. I was wrong. It looks okay. Sure is a fine looking pizza.
SpongeBob: Yeah.
Squidward: What's that? Is that the cheese?
SpongeBob: Yeah!
Squidward: And the pepperoni?
SpongeBob: Yeah!
Squidward: Oh, looks good, huh?
SpongeBob: Wait a second, I know what you're trying to do, Squidward. I'm not letting you eat the pizza!
Squidward: Give me the pizza!
SpongeBob: No!
Squidward: Don't make me take it away from you, SpongeBob!
SpongeBob: Get away!
Squidward: Get back here, SpongeBob, give me the pizza!
SpongeBob: No!
Squidward: SpongeBob!
SpongeBob: No!
Squidward: SpongeBob!
SpongeBob: No!
Squidward: Wait!
SpongeBob: No! No![runs into Squidward]
Squidward: I want that pizza and you're gonna hand it over one way or another!
SpongeBob: Look, we're saved!
Squidward: Sure, we're saved. Now give me some pizza!
SpongeBob: No, really Squid, we're saved! We're saved! We're saved! [he jumps in and out of his pants]
Squidward: Will you cut that out?!
SpongeBob: [to a conga beat] Saved, saved, saved, saved! Saved, saved, saved, saved, saved, saved! [rips himself apart then the two parts go in circles and then they connect again. SpongeBob starts doing a conga dance] Saved, saved, saved, saved, saved, saved! Saved, saved, saved, saved, saved, saved! Saved, we are saved!
Squidward: That's just a stupid boulder!
SpongeBob: It's not just a boulder. [sniff] It's a rock. [cries] A rock! A rock! Its a big beautiful, old rock. [climbs up it and rubs it] Oh, the pioneers used to ride these babies for miles, and it's in great shape.
Squidward: SpongeBob, will you forget the stupid pioneers?! Have you ever noticed that there are none of them left? That's because they were lousy hitchhikers, ate coral and took directions from algae! And now, you're telling me they thought they could drive... [SpongeBob runs over Squidward with the boulder] ...rocks? Hold on there, Jethro!
SpongeBob: I can't wait to see the look on our customers face! [rings doorbell]
Tom: Yeah?
SpongeBob: Congratulations, sir. Your Krabby Patty pizza is here!
Tom: Wow, thanks! I've been dying for one of these. It... [brief pause] Where's my drink?
SpongeBob: What drink?
Tom: [in an angry tone] My drink!? My diet Dr. Kelp. Don't tell me you forgot my drink!
SpongeBob: [checks through the order] But, you didn't order any...
Tom: [yelling] How am I supposed to eat this pizza without my drink?!
SpongeBob: But... but... [Tears start rolling down his face]
Tom: Didn't you ever once think of the customer?! [gives the pizza back] You call yourself a delivery boy?! Well I ain't buying! [slams door. SpongeBob goes over to Squidward, smiling and trying not to cry]
Squidward: Sponge? Sponge? It's okay. Sponge? [SpongeBob drops the pizza, falls over, starts sobbing and absorbs his tears] Sponge? [Squidward gets angry, grabs the pizza, stomps towards the Customer's house and pounds on the door]
Tom: Another one? Look, I told your little friend I ain't paying for that!
Squidward: Well, this one's on the house! [throws the pizza in Tom's face, knocking him out]
SpongeBob: [still crying] Did he change his mind?
Squidward: [smugly] He sure did. Ate the whole thing in one bite.
SpongeBob: [stops crying] No drink?
Squidward: Nah. Now take me home. [jumps up on the rock]
SpongeBob: Are you kidding? We have just enough time to make it back to work. [backs up the rock where they are instantly at the Krusty Krab]
Squidward: Work? [screen cuts to black] Oh, my aching tentacles!PavéFamous Mushroom
Gift received at 10-05-2016, 02:22 PM from AronthaerThe Bell Tree Fair 2016 PatchAvatar AnimationPear (Fruit)White Pansy
    Quote Originally Posted by B e t h a n y View Post
    I do too, I used to have heaps of online friends I'd play with all the time. But I guess we just all forgot about acnl and grew apart.
    This sounds really depressing for some reason

    I never really had any friends to play acnl with. Always played alone ;-;
    THE HYPE FOR SUPER MARIO ODYSSEY IS LIT!!!

    Awesome sig pic by wearthesun!!


  3. #3093
    the bluest diamond Sanrio's Avatar
    Join Date
    February 23, 2017
    Posts
    719
    Bells
    19
    Eggs
    0
    3DS
    4141-5543-8176
    Items: Tasty CakeTasty CakeTasty Cake
    Quote Originally Posted by xSuperMario64x View Post
    This sounds really depressing for some reason

    I never really had any friends to play acnl with. Always played alone ;-;
    same, i'm pretty much forever alone

  4. #3094
    The Craaaaziest Kitsune™ FreeHelium's Avatar
    Join Date
    February 8, 2017
    Posts
    1,446
    Bells
    0
    Eggs
    0
    3DS
    1332-9052-4314
    NN ID
    crazyreddis35
    Items: Silver MailboxWhite Rose
Gift received at 12-21-2016, 03:03 PM from Flare
Message: [dog barks]

  
[ Gwen Stefani featuring Eve:
Rich Girl]

  
She's on her way.

  
[woman] Good morning, Viv.

  
Hello, Willow. Lovely to see you.

  
- [woman] Here she comes!
- [man] Is that the new Louis Vuitton?

  
[man 2] I might've known
she'd be the first.

  
[woman 2] Fabulous bag. She's so chic.

  
Sorry I'm late.
We had to do a little shopping.

  
Now that's the way to travel.
I'm so jealous.

  
Faboo!

  
Louis Vuitton never looked so good.

  
Mmm. Tell me the stones
in that collar are not real.

  
Aren't they gorgeous?
Viv said I had to have it.

  
[dogs barking]

  
- Sorry keep you waiting.
- Armand, it's fine.

  
A brush and a seaweed wrap,
but I need her by noon.

  
- We're having lunch with my niece.
- She'll be ready.

  
I know, sweetheart. I'm going to miss
you, too. You take good care of her.

  
- No waxing, OK?
- OK, no waxing for her.

  
I hope she gives me a red bow.
I want to look my best today.

  
- Bimini has a date with Scooter.
- Nice pedigree.

  
Please! The dog chases parked cars.

  
- He's crazier than a Labradoodle.
- I give it a week, tops.

  
- Hey! Talk to the paw.
- [Chloe] Good for you, Bimini.

  
It's not easy to find a mate with
papers. Let alone one you could love.

  
Me, I'd be happy with
one who's not... fixed.

  
[chuckles]

  
- [whistles]
- [Chloe laughs]

  
Down, boy.

  
[ Kylie Minogue:
Wow]

  
[woman] All right, what's next?

  
- What do you think?
- Please. She wears Harry Winston.

  
Viv?

  
Fabulous. I'll take two.
You should see Chloe.

  
I'll need at least two days at corporate
in New York to meet with buyers.

  
- You have a little beret?
- Perfection.

  
[speaks Italian]

  
Who needs sleep? It's Italy.

  
Preppy little beauty.

  
- This just came in.
- She's allergic to wool. No.

  
- Love that.
- [Viv] Oh! Fabulous!

  
- Viv.
- I love it. And do you love it?

  
You may have it.
I'll get you anything you want.

  
Yes, I will. No, not you, Patrick.

  
Hello, Jackie O.

  
- Love the smell of dirt in the morning.
- Sam, the garden looks gorgeous.

  
And I love the new designs
for the waterfall that you did.

  
- Thank you.
- You're welcome.

  
For everything. For giving me
a chance to prove myself.

  
Oh, good job, Papi. Very symmetrical.

  
[Sam speaks Spanish]

  
Ciao. Ciao, Papi.

  
Yes, yes. We did it, Papi.
Yes. Yes!

  
Go on, take a break, Papi.
You're doing great, buddy.

  
Hello, beautiful.

  
You're blocking my sun.

  
 Mi corazón, you shine
much brighter than the sun

  
 Why won't you be my one 

  
- What's that smell?
- Which one?

  
The sweat of my labor
or the mint patch I rolled in for you?

  
- Neither.
- Then it must be the fertilizer.

  
Gross! You're covered in it.

  
Of course. I am a landscaper.

  
Grasshopper, mi corazón?

  
I caught it myself. Very tasty.

  
Papi, that's so... disgusting.

  
I see you're tempted. I'll leave it here
in case you change your mind.

  
- [doorbell rings]
- Excuse me. We have guests.

  
Guests? You got guests... OK.

  
You want to go have a drink later?
There's a great puddle by the garage.

  
OK, never mind.

  
Aunt Viv! I'm here!

  
[Chloe] An hour late, as usual.

  
- Aunt Viv, hello!
- [barking]

  
How do you keep a job?
Oh, that's right, you don't.

  
Where's Aunt Viv?
Where's Aunt Viv? Chloe, go find her.

  
- Go on. Go find her.
- Who am I, Lassie?

  
You're so completely useless.

  
Of course I understand.

  
[Viv] It's just that I'm headed to
Europe to promote my new cosmetic line.

  
No, this is wonderful news.
It's the best news.

  
Yes, yes. OK. Wonderful. Bye.

  
- Is everything OK, Aunt Viv?
- I don't know what I'm going to do.

  
I am getting on a plane at 4:00,
and I gave the staff the week off...

  
and Chloe's dog nanny just
had her baby three weeks early.

  
- You're not taking Chloe with you?
- No, no.

  
Obviously if it was a vacation,
of course, but this is a business trip.

  
Four cities in ten days.

  
She's much too delicate for that kind
of travel. Plus she hates Berlin.

  
- What about a kennel?
- [Chloe] Kennel?

  
No.

  
No, no. I could never leave her
in the hands of strangers.

  
Never in a million years.

  
But you're not a stranger.

  
- What?
- What?

  
Here is Chloe's schedule.
Try to stay to it as much as possible.

  
I could skip the dog park on Wednesday

  
because Chloe's friend, Stella,
came down with fleas.

  
I'm about to entrust you with
my greatest treasure.

  
Take good care.

  
I love you, sweetheart.

  
I love you so much.
Mommy loves you so much.

  
Bye-bye! Have fun, you two!

  
- OK. Bye!
- [doorbell rings]

  
Playdate?

  
[ Right Said Fred:
I'm Too Sexy]

  
Here you go. Good luck.

  
[ball squeaking]

  
[dogs barking]

  
Don't worry, Chloe.
Viv will be back before you know it.

  
Rachel doesn't look so bad.

  
You don't know the half of it.

  
[girl] They all look so cute
in their little outfits.

  
You didn't have to dress her.
She's so picky.

  
- You're talking about a Chihuahua.
- She's not any Chihuahua, Angela.

  
She's a bossy, arrogant, manipulative,
Beverly Hills Chihuahua.

  
She has no direction. She can't keep
a job. She's never on time.

  
I'm going to be late to my appointments.

  
Don't get me started on her schedule.

  
Shiatsu massages, doggy birthday
parties, couture fittings.

  
I have to change
her outfit four times a day.

  
I mean, look at her.

  
[both] She's so...

  
...irresponsible.
...spoiled.

  
- Woof.
- [sighs]

  
- I need to cool off.
- Dive in, girl.

  
Whoa!

  
Hi, mami.

  
Oh!

  
Who is that hunk
of Chihuahua over there?

  
- [Bimini] Nice.
- Mi corazón!

  
The gardener.

  
You are more lovely...

  
- than the dawn.
- Wow.

  
Mi corazón!

  
You are more lovely...
than the dawn!

  
So embarrassing. Maybe he'll go away.

  
[speaks Spanish]

  
I only...

  
Excuse me while I bravely defend
your garden against that dangerous bird.

  
Hey, bird!

  
That is one hot dog.

  
Excuse me.
Coming through. Nice legs.

  
Mud all over me.

  
Hey, hey! Excuse me!

  
Excuse me! Excuse me, señor?
Gardener guy?

  
Your dog is muy bad.
Muy, muy, muy bad. Mucho naughty.

  
[speaks Spanish]

  
Can you get... your...

  
...doggie-o out of here?

  
Perdóname, por favor,
but my heart must speak.

  
I only wish to say...

  
that if you ever need someone
to lick inside your ears...

  
or chew the hard to reach places...

  
or share your slumber in the sun...

  
I would be most honored
to be that special someone.

  
- Woof.
- Put your tongue back in your mouth.

  
Oh. I don't think so, Papi.

  
You mean, not now.

  
I mean... not ever.

  
I see. Of course. Well...

  
This thing.

  
[speaks Spanish]

  
Papi! [whistles]

  
Duty calls! Please have
a most wonderful day.

  
Cool. Thanks a lot.

  
[speaks Spanish]

  
[barking]

  
Rachel, wake up.
I've got a mani-pedi at 11:00,

  
and you have to make my waffles.

  
- Get up!
- [phone ringing]

  
[crashing]

  
[barking]

  
Aunt Viv's.

  
- Hi, Angela.
- [dog toy squeaks]

  
What?

  
You're a genius.

  
Yes, I can be ready
in 30 minutes. OK, bye!

  
Pack your swimsuit, Chloe.
We're going on a trip.

  
A trip? Ooh, where are we going?

  
[girls] Mexico! Yeah!

  
[ Buster Poindexter:
Hot Hot Hot]

  
I love this town!

  
- Let's check it out.
- Surfer boys, hi!

  
Hi.

  
I love this town!

  
I could totally live here.
Isn't this great?

  
I'm starting to get the feeling
there's no Four Seasons here.

  
Whoo!

  
- Third floor, baby.
- Woo!

  
Hello? Somebody forget something?

  
- I'm walking by myself.
- [Rachel] Chloe!

  
I'm starving.
What's taking them so long?

  
Wait. What time are
we supposed to meet the guys?

  
Right now, at that club.

  
Wait a minute. I forgot
the name of the club.

  
- Cayuca Club!
- Right. Cayuca!

  
Be right back.

  
- Dinner time!
- Finally.

  
You should dance with Bryan, Rache.

  
- I'm gonna dance with him.
- He's cute!

  
You'd better be making me
either prime rib or reservations.

  
There you go.

  
You're joking, right?

  
I am ready to dance all night!

  
There's only one thing this is good for.

  
- Try this on for size.
- Come on, let's go!

  
Chloe!

  
That's a bad dog!
That's a very bad dog!

  
[Chloe whining]

  
Rachel. What did you do to her?

  
Nothing! She's faking! Let's go.

  
- You silly girl.
- She's so cute.

  
- We should take her with us.
- Yes! Take me out for food.

  
- I'm not taking the dog dancing.
- Cayuca!

  
Hey! Wait!

  
Come back here! Oops.

  
Just add that to the bill.

  
[both speak Spanish]

  
Hello?

  
Hola and adiós.

  
You want to dance, Rachel? Let's dance.

  
OK. Guy with a giant knife. Moving on.

  
[people banging drums, playing music]

  
If I wasn't starving,
this might actually be fun.

  
Oh! There you are.

  
You are in so much troub...

  
Put me down! Who are you?

  
Rachel, help me! Somebody, please.
I'm being dognapped!

  
[indistinct Spanish]

  
Rachel!

  
- So... good night.
- Seriously?

  
No kiss?

  
Chloe!

  
Chloe, come out.

  
I'm not kidding. I mean it. Stop hiding.

  
Chloe?
I'm sorry I gave you dog food.

  
Chloe?

  
I'll order you room service
for breakfast in the morning!

  
- Chloe?
- What's up, love bug?

  
Chloe's missing.

  
I don't know where she would go.
She doesn't like to walk anywhere,

  
- let alone run.
- Well...

  
- What?
- Las peleas de perros were in town.

  
Dogfights. They're criminals.
Always on the move.

  
How do I find them?

  
I have heard rumors.

  
Mexico City?

  
Then there's nothing more you can do.

  
You've done everything you can.

  
Why don't you go
put your suit on and join us?

  
I'm going to keep looking for Chloe.

  
And if I can't find her,
I'm going to Mexico City.

  
Rache...

  
[Rachel] Chloe!

  
[dogs barking]

  
Where am I?

  
You're in the dogfights.

  
Dogfights? What?

  
This is outrageous.

  
I was born to shop, not fight.
Unless it's at a sales rack.

  
- Quit whining, princesa.
- Chloe Winthrop Ashe does not whine.

  
[Speaks Spanish]
A delusional Chihuahua.

  
You won't get any sympathy from Delgado,
señorita. He's a gladiator.

  
A gladiator?

  
You know. A fighter.
Delgado is the best of the best.

  
Don't listen to Rafa, chica.
El Diablo's the meanest dog in the fights.

  
Word is they fought once before,
and Delgado did not come out on top.

  
[praying in Spanish]

  
What's he saying?

  
Ay, bendito, he always
prays before a fight.

  
Don't you speak any Spanish,
chica?

  
The name's Chloe, not chica.
And why would I speak Spanish?

  
- Hello! You're a Chihuahua, mi hija!
- So?

  
I'm from Beverly Hills. You know, 90210,
the shopping capital of the world?

  
She's a gringa from California.

  
That's right. The only reason
I'm here is because I was stolen.

  
- You think I volunteered for this?
- [Chloe] But I'm an heiress.

  
- A hairless?
- No, an heiress.

  
- I have a trust fund.
- Look.

  
If you're worth something,
they'll ransom you.

  
And if they ransom you,
they won't fight you.

  
- Guess you have nothing to worry about.
- Well, that's a relief.

  
I am so glad you feel better.
Now can we get a little quiet?

  
I can't wait until Viv finds out
what Rachel's done.

  
 Mi corazón,
I think of you day and night 

  
[sniffing] Hold your tacos.

  
These scents are old.

  
[Sam] Papi? Time to go home!

  
Where is she? Where is my Chloe?

  
Whoa!

  
What's going on?
[barks]

  
Hey, Papi, come on. Let's go.

  
- Hi. Hola.
- Hi.

  
I'm Rachel's friend, and...
you're the gardener, right?

  
- I'm Sam.
- Your garden is muy bonita.

  
And when I get a casa,
I'm so calling you to be my gardener...

  
- because it's...
- Thank you very much.

  
- Where's Rachel?
- Forget her, dude. Where's Chloe?

  
And what are you hiding there?

  
Chloe's lost in Mexico.
Rachel stayed to find her.

  
The love of my life
is out there in trouble?

  
She wants me to e-mail
this to her in Mexico City.

  
So...

  
[speaks Spanish]

  
[ George Thorogood and The Destroyers:
Bad To The Bone]

  
Señoras y señores!

  
You know him, you love him.

  
El campeón, El Diablo!

  
Oh. It's about time someone's
upgrading my accommodations.

  
And now, the challenger.

  
Weighing in at a whopping six pounds.

  
I give you Chi-Chihuahua!

  
Hey!

  
[laughter]

  
Thank you.

  
Thank you. You're too kind, really.

  
This is so much nicer
than that stinky corral.

  
Oh! I'm sorry.
I thought I was alone.

  
- Mister...
- They call me El Diablo.

  
It's certainly nice to meet you.
Clearly I'm in the wrong place.

  
So perhaps we could
speak to the concierge or someone.

  
Stop talking!

  
You know, I've got a dentist who could
do something about that yellowing.

  
- What?
- I get the idea that teeth...

  
- are important in your line of work.
- You don't like my smile?

  
- [barking]
- Watch it! Say it, don't spray it!

  
- [mumbling] What am I going to do?
- Sounds like he's closing in.

  
Dog that size?
Won't be much left of her.

  
[mumbling] Gringa, gringa.

  
She's adiós. She's bye-bye.

  
Poor little hairless.

  
[praying in Spanish]

  
OK, that's it.

  
Delgado? What are you doing?

  
Huh?

  
- What's going on?
- Where are you going?

  
- How do you do that?
- Bro, give me the combination!

  
- Yeah, save us!
- Save us, Delgado!

  
- Don't leave us!
- Come back!

  
This is highly inappropriate.
Hey, hey, hey! That's cashmere!

  
Ow!

  
- Vámonos!
- Hasta la bye-bye!

  
Let go before it... rips.

  
I know it's rude to leave early,
but I really must be going now.

  
The show's over for you, chica.

  
You know, "dog eat dog" is
just an expression!

  
- Not this time, Diablo!
- Delgado!

  
- Move it!
- OK.

  
You'll pay for this, Delgado!
I'll find you!

  
[indistinct chattering]

  
Wait, wait!
Slow down, you guys! Slow down!

  
- What's wrong?
- I told you, it wasn't my fault!

  
Where'd the dogs go? Go, go!

  
[Vasquez] I want that Chihuahua!

  
[barking]

  
[indistinct Spanish]

  
- [Chloe] English, please!
- [Delgado] Move it! Let's go!

  
- This way! This way!
- OK.

  
[speaks Spanish]

  
[panting]

  
- My bootie!
- Your what?

  
- My bootie!
- Forget it!

  
- Forget it?
- Forget it!

  
- The Chihuahua!
- That's Italian leather, mister!

  
[Chloe] Look out!

  
Go! Go!

  
One at a time!

  
[Chloe] Hey! Wait a minute!
You won't fit!

  
I got it!

  
Oh, no. I lost another bootie.

  
I am sure I locked those cages, sir.

  
I want that Chihuahua!

  
Why?

  
She's worth something.

  
[Vasquez] Judging by the diamonds
around her neck, it's a lot.

  
Look out.

  
- [upbeat mariachi music]
- [cheering]

  
What is all of this?

  
[Spanish]

  
The Day of the Dead.

  
This is so beautiful.

  
It's what humans do
to honor their ancestors.

  
It keeps them... alive in their hearts.

  
Helps them remember who they are,
where they came from.

  
Wow!

  
- You're my dog!
- Delgado, gracias, bro.

  
- I'm out of here!
- I'll see ya, kid.

  
Wait! Wait... Delgado!

  
[Chloe] "See ya?" That's it?

  
Number one rule of the streets,
princesa. Every dog for himself.

  
Now, get lost.

  
My name is not "Princesa." It's Chloe.

  
And I am lost. And I want to be found.

  
[Spanish]

  
Look, princesa...
I mean... look, kid.

  
I got my own problems.

  
I can't go back to the fights.
I got to get out of town.

  
- How does Beverly Hills sound?
- Too far.

  
Come on! If you could
figure out a way back,

  
you could live with us on our estate.

  
If you haven't noticed,
I'm a little large for a lapdog.

  
But you're the perfect size
for a guard dog.

  
Our old one... Papi, he... ran off.

  
You had a guard dog named Papi?

  
[mumbles in Spanish]

  
- What hotel you staying in?
- You'll do it?

  
Answer the question
before I change my mind!

  
I don't know the name, but believe me,
it was no Carthay Hotel.

  
The Carthay? There's one here.
Would they know you?

  
They should. We're preferred guests.
We have a gold card.

  
Why me? Of all the dogs in Mexico.

  
Why me? All I need,
Chihuahua with booties.

  
This'll be fun! You'll see.

  
Here's the GPS.

  
We're hot.

  
Diablo, you go get me that Chihuahua.

  
Go! Go!

  
[dog howling]

  
- Hold up a second.
- Uh...

  
What's that sound?

  
- Hmm. Hold your breath.
- [Chloe shrieks]

  
- What did you do that for?
- El Diablo's got your scent.

  
Of course he does. It's Chanel No. 5.

  
- Congratulations.
- Now I've lost another bootie...

  
- and I stink.
- I don't smell anything.

  
Are you kidding? I smell like a wet dog.

  
You are a wet dog.

  
[police siren]

  
- Look... señorita...
- Ashe.

  
Ashe. I'm sorry.

  
We're already trying to stop the fights.

  
And we don't have time to look
for every lost dog in Mexico.

  
This is not just any dog.

  
This is my Aunt Viv's dog.
Chloe means everything to her.

  
I'll tell you what.

  
Go back to your hotel, download
that photo you were telling me about

  
and I will see what I can do.

  
- Gracias.
- You're welcome!

  
[Mexican Hat Dance ringtone]

  
- Hi, Aunt Viv.
- Ciao, Rachel.

  
Yes, Capri's fantastic.

  
I was trying the house earlier.
I was worried because nobody was there.

  
Yeah, we went out for Mexican.

  
Could I talk to her just a second?

  
Um... I'll put her on.

  
[imitates barking]

  
Hi, baby! How's my little baby?

  
[continues barking]

  
I miss you, too! I miss you, too!

  
[more barking]

  
OK, here you are,
Your Highness. Carthay Hotel.

  
[sighs] I feel like I'm home already!

  
- Thank you, Delgado. Thank you!
- All in a day's work.

  
But... maybe you should wait out here.

  
- Yeah, whatever.
- I don't mean it like it sounds,

  
but they can be a little particular
about the dogs they let in.

  
Knock yourself out.

  
We'll be eating gourmet food in no time.

  
- Bienvenidos al Hotel Carthay.
- [Chloe] Thank you.

  
Excuse me. Would you be so kind
as to look at my collar?

  
You'll find my owner's
name and number.

  
[barking]

  
Tshh! Get out!

  
Hello! Ew!

  
It touched me!

  
Get this mutt out of here.

  
- Mutt? How dare you!
- [concierge] Edgar!

  
I've been a preferred customer
at this hotel for years!

  
Don't you dare!

  
- I'm sorry.
- You are making a big mistake. Huge.

  
Really! [shrieks]

  
Oh, no.

  
I'm...

  
I'm... hideous.

  
What's taking her so long?

  
Hmm. Figures.

  
What did I expect...
de una princesa?

  
Delgado, it was so humiliating.
You won't believe...

  
Delgado?

  
Delgado.

  
[ Megan McCauley:
Porcelain Doll]

  
[bells jingling]

  
Excuse me. I'm here to see
Detective Ramirez.

  
Detective Ramirez is already with someone,
señorita. Five minutes, please.

  
[door buzzes]

  
Psst. Don't look now,
Hannah Montana, three o'clock.

  
What are you doing here?
I mean, qué are you doing here?

  
Isn't it obvious? To find Chloe.

  
Angela told me everything.

  
Why did you pretend
you couldn't speak English?

  
I didn't. You just assumed.

  
Thought you'd let me go along
and make a fool of myself?

  
Didn't need any help with that.

  
What makes you think
I need help from a gardener?

  
Oh, no, she didn't.

  
It's not that I have a
problem with that word, but,

  
actually, I am a landscaper.

  
And I'm not here for you.

  
I'm here for Vivian,
because she's like family to me.

  
[clears throat]

  
I e-mailed a description
of the dog's collar to all our stations.

  
Chloe's collar. It's worth a fortune.

  
You're welcome.

  
Maybe a picture of the collar
might be even more helpful.

  
Yeah, a lot. Gracias.

  
So what should we do now?

  
We? Nothing.

  
You go back to
your hotel and wait. Please.

  
He's right. There's nothing you can do.

  
What? We're Mexi-can, not Mexi-can't!

  
I'm not going to stop looking.
He only cares about the collar.

  
I need the dog.

  
I'm with her, amigo.
My Chloe's in trouble.

  
Hey! Papi! Hey!

  
- Come on, fool. Let's go!
- Papi, where're you going?

  
[ Tag Team:
Whoomp (There It Is]

  
I cannot believe Chloe's missing this.

  
Sebastian! Thank you.

  
Going to be on the cover
of Purebred Monthly.

  
- Oh.
- Whoo hoo!

  
This party is off the leash!

  
Whoa! Party!

  
So Scooter.

  
- Come here, Birthday Dog.
- No, Whiskey.

  
No, that really isn't necessary.

  
OK. Thank you, thank you.

  
Ooh.

  
Hey, you guys don't think
Chloe's in trouble, do you?

  
Paa-lease. I bet Rachel whisked her
off to some faboo place.

  
If I know Chloe...

  
she's sitting under a palm tree
being waited on by some hunky husky.

  
Oh! Thank you!

  
[groans] I must be starving.

  
- Yeah. That's our churro.
- Sí, our churro.

  
Excuse me, but... I saw it first!

  
- Better back off, muchachos.
- [laughing]

  
Looks like we have
one of those Chihuahua warriors!

  
Now look, I've been dognapped,
lost my favorite cashmere sweater...

  
slept in a box and I'm starting another
in a series of bad hair days.

  
So don't... push me!

  
- Let's get out of here, man.
- Sorry... sorry.

  
That's what I thought. Ha!

  
It's time to pay the piper,
perra pequeña.

  
- Where were we?
- [Delgado] Hang on, kid!

  
[El Diablo] Still trying to be the hero!
I'll smell you out, Delgado.

  
[ Los Pericos:
Caliente]

  
The Aztec Empire's heart
was right here in Chapultepec Park.

  
Once used by the kings
as a royal retreat.

  
[crowd screams]

  
[barking]

  
- Move it! Hurry up!
- I am!

  
- Come on! Two at a time!
- I have four-inch legs.

  
Come on. This way.

  
Not this way.

  
- Where to now?
- Now we're trapped.

  
- Now what?
- I'm thinking, I'm thinking.

  
Why did you abandon me?

  
I've already been abandoned once.

  
You left me, I didn't leave you!

  
I saw you in there
getting pampered, and eating...

  
The closest I came to food
was a used churro.

  
[barking]

  
Come on, let's go.

  
- Where are we going?
- I'm taking you to Puerto Vallarta.

  
- Somebody there can help us.
- That on the way to Beverly Hills?

  
Over here. Jump in.

  
- Delgado?
- What?

  
Why is El Diablo after me?

  
Vasquez must have sent him.

  
Who's Vasquez?

  
He runs the dog fights and anything
else he can make a quick buck at.

  
The police have been after him
for years, but he's slippery.

  
How do you know all that?

  
Were you a criminal or something?

  
Or something. Get some sleep.

  
It's a long ride
and tomorrow's a big day.

  
What did El Diablo mean by,
"Still trying to be the hero?"

  
[sighs]

  
Never mind.

  
[truck engine starts]

  
[mariachi music playing]

  
[sniffing] What the...
What's this? That's Chloe's bootie!

  
Hey, lady!

  
What? What is it?
Chloe's bootie. Good job.

  
She is near. I can feel it.

  
Hey, wait for me!

  
[Spanish]

  
[Sam] He said...

  
he saw a white Chihuahua
with a bunch of dogs run through here.

  
She was being carried
by a German Shepherd...

  
- German Shepherd carried my Chloe?
- Let's go!

  
I'm going to kick some tail. Papi style!

  
- [phone ringing]
- Yes?

  
[Rafferty] Someone else
is looking for that dog.

  
There is a lot of money riding on
this Chihuahua, do you understand?

  
They cannot find her before we do.

  
- I'm on it.
- Good.

  
Come on, baby.

  
Come on, Diablo.

  
[ The Cat Empire:
Hello]

  
OK, this is us. We're here.
Shake your last bootie and let's go.

  
- [Chloe] What's your plan?
- [Delgado] OK, here's the deal.

  
Plant your paws here, keep your muzzle
shut, and wait for me to come back.

  
But... where are you going?
Delgado?

  
You're very withholding, you know that?

  
I guess this is my day at the spa.

  
Ahh.

  
Much better.

  
There she is.
Now, you remember the con, right?

  
I don't really have to eat you, do I?

  
Only swallow my legs.
OK, here we go. Easy on the teeth.

  
- Act scary.
- OK.

  
Help! Help, please help me!

  
- Help me, somebody! Help!
- You're choking me.

  
Keep your tongue to yourself.

  
Help me! Somebody, please!

  
This is just like Animal Planet.
What do I do?

  
Something! Anything! Help!

  
Shoo, lizard. Shoo, shoo.
Regurgitate that rat!

  
Ew.

  
Oh, my gosh. Are you all right? Hello?

  
Are you an angel? Am I dead?

  
No. And I'm not an angel.

  
And yet you're wearing a halo.

  
This? This is my collar
from Harry Winston.

  
- Is that in heaven?
- [Chloe] Well...

  
Sort of. Beverly Hills.

  
Ahh.

  
Beverly Hills.
You're a long way from home.

  
Perhaps I can be of assistance.
I am Manuel.

  
I work on a luxury cruise ship
as a porter...

  
tending to the discriminating needs
of refined, upscale dogs like yourself.

  
Really? Do you think you
could help me get home?

  
Well, you saved my life.
It's the very least I can do.

  
[chuckles]

  
[indistinct Spanish]
[barking]

  
Delgado?

  
Delgado?

  
- Hey, Tomas.
- It's really you, cuz?

  
What happened? Where you been?
Nobody's seen you since...

  
You know, a while.

  
Look... I'm doing this
little security gig.

  
I'm taking a rich Chihuahua
back to Beverly Hills.

  
She's got a tag
on her collar.

  
So take her to a rescue shelter.

  
- They'll read it and call the owner.
- Not that simple.

  
Vasquez is looking for her,
he's got informants everywhere.

  
He's even got El Diablo after her.

  
El Diablo. That's why you're doing it?

  
That delincuente is behind me.

  
It's just a job. Can you get
Officer Mendez to call her tag?

  
Yeah, OK. Bring it to me.

  
- I'll see what I can do.
- Gracias.

  
Come on, let's go.
I found someone to read your tag.

  
- Really? So did I.
- Where's your collar?

  
You're not the only one
who can get things done.

  
- What?
- I gave my collar to Manuel...

  
He is taking it to
the ship's captain to read.

  
Manuel? Who's Manuel?

  
The kindly pack rat
who's helping me out.

  
I saved him from
being eaten by an iguana.

  
An iguana? An iguana!

  
That is the oldest con in the book!
Iguanas are vegetarians!

  
I'm sorry. I don't meet
many iguanas on Rodeo Drive.

  
Without your ID tag...

  
there's nothing to separate you
from any collarless stray on the street!

  
But... Well...

  
Manuel promised me
he'd be right back from the ship.

  
What ship? That ship?

  
What happened to the
"don't talk to strangers"?

  
You said nothing about iguanas.

  
[Spanish]

  
[Manuel] then I said, "Are you an
angel?" American dogs are so gullible.

  
[laughs] Chico, who is the
greatest con man in Mexico?

  
You are. And now,
can we steal some lunch? I'm hungry.

  
- Where did you get that?
- Please don't eat me, man!

  
I got a wife and 300 kids to feed.

  
- Eat him first!
- Where is the Chihuahua?

  
Chihuahua? I don't know any Chihuahua.
I'm from the Yucatán.

  
Of course if you'd like to meet one,
I could arrange it for the right price.

  
You're about to be lunch.

  
That's the right price.
How'd you know?

  
Do something, Manuel.

  
You're trying my patience,
chaparrito.

  
Stop trying his patience.

  
- Where is she?
- By the fountain, near the docks.

  
I didn't know she was a friend of yours.
I was just borrowing it.

  
Please don't hurt me.

  
[short growl]

  
Hmm. Hmm.

  
[Manuel] Ha! That's dog's lucky
I didn't cha-cha on his chest.

  
You know, Manuel, I don't think
that dog was a friend of hers.

  
It's not our problem, Chico.

  
Come on, let's go raid a piñata.
I feel like feeding my sweet tooth.

  
Leave me out of this, Manuel.
Where there's a piñata, there's a stick.

  
- Uh, Delgado?
- Yeah?

  
What are we doing here?

  
- This is where we meet the coyote.
- A coyote?

  
A smuggler. They sneak collarless dogs
like us across the border.

  
You used to be a police dog, didn't you?

  
That's how you know Sergeant Tomas.
That's how you can do all those things.

  
- I don't want to talk about it.
- Did you quit? Did you get fired?

  
Did you do something wrong?

  
Yes, I did something wrong, OK?
You satisfied?

  
Now, just drop it.

  
OK. OK.

  
There he is. We're on. Follow me.

  
- And no more questions.
- OK. OK.

  
- But what was it? Was someone hurt?
- [Delgado] Drop it! Just drop it!

  
[speaks Spanish]

  
You're driving me crazy.

  
You're not exactly the most charming
traveling companion either.

  
- Good, because we're parting ways.
- What?

  
Wait, wait! What are you doing?

  
This train will take you to Tijuana.

  
- But...
- But nothing.

  
The coyote will take you
over the border.

  
- Buenos Días.
- Wha...

  
Make yourself at home. [laughs]

  
Best of luck.

  
But... you promised.

  
Delgado...

  
[sighs]

  
Don't turn around. Don't turn around.

  
Don't... What am I doing?

  
- Delgado!
- Chloe!

  
- Delgado!
- Chloe!

  
Come on. Jump!

  
It's a fast train!

  
You can do it! Jump!

  
That hurt.

  
OK, good.

  
- I could use a little help.
- I'll pull you up.

  
[Chloe shrieks]

  
- Don't help. Don't help.
- [shrieks]

  
[heavy breathing]

  
[sighs]

  
What can I say? A promise is a promise.

  
Sure thing, Delgado.

  
[Rachel] Sam! How do you say
"lost" in Spanish?

  
[speaks Spanish]

  
[sniffs]

  
Chloe.

  
Wait, he's got something.

  
Papi! Papi!

  
You! That scent.
Where did you get that scent?

  
Maybe you haven't noticed,

  
but I'm currently napping
in a sewage pipe.

  
You mean the moldy taco?

  
No, fool. The perfume. It's Chloe's.

  
She's an American Chihuahua.

  
Her ears are as pink as seashells...

  
and her nose is like a raspberry.

  
- You serious, bro?
- Eh? A berry?

  
[speaks Spanish]

  
Is she kind of uppity?
Wears matching clothes?

  
- You know her? Where is she?
- Last we saw her...

  
- she was with Delgado on the run.
- Yeah.

  
- Mm-hm.
- Delgado? Who is this Delgado?

  
I want to hear more. Come with me.

  
Looks like he found a couple of friends.

  
Just what we need, stray dogs.

  
Papi was a stray dog.
I saved him from the pound.

  
Hey, buddy.

  
He inspires me every day.
What inspires you, Rachel?

  
Get back to you on that.

  
- [whimpers]
- Hey.

  
Look at that. How you doing? Hello.

  
I guess he is kind of cute.
We could take them with us,

  
but you have to give them a bath,
they stink.

  
I can handle that.

  
- You stink! Oh!
- You just need a bath.

  
Oh, I love this!

  
I think I'm in love
with the gringa.

  
[ Los Lonely Boys:
Heaven]

  
- I think he likes it.
- I think he likes you.

  
Where you going? Wait for me!

  
- [splashing]
- [screaming]

  
Oh, yeah. Mira, I'm clean.
I'm clean. I never knew clean.

  
I know clean now.

  
I have never had
my teeth brushed before.

  
It's... minty.

  
[chuckles] It's weird.

  
Papi, this is great!

  
- We should call room service.
- Let's order a movie.

  
Have we found a home, Papi?

  
I don't know, but they'll make sure
you're safe.

  
Sam did it for me.

  
See you tomorrow.

  
- Come on.
- No, they can stay with me.

  
I take responsibility.

  
[Sam] Cool.

  
Papi, what do you see, compa?

  
It's a big place, my little friend.

  
I may be small, but I am fighting...

  
for something... bigger than all of it.

  
Mi Corazón.

  
[ Enrique Iglesias:
Hero]

  
Excuse me. Where are you from?

  
- I'm from Beverly Hills.
- [puppy] Where is that?

  
Well... it feels like
a long way from here.

  
Señorita, what is that?

  
It's a bootie. I lost the others.

  
All the dogs in Beverly Hills
wear them to protect their feet.

  
It must be very dirty there.

  
[chuckles] No. Actually, it's probably
the cleanest place I know.

  
Then that's pretty silly
to wear a bootie.

  
Pedro, be polite.

  
You know something, Pedro?

  
You're right.

  
[yawns]

  
[train horn blows]

  
[barking]

  
- [knocking on door]
- [Sam] Rachel.

  
Rachel.

  
Come on, Sleeping Beauty, let's go.

  
[Sam] Detective Ramirez called.

  
A white Chihuahua and a German
Shepherd were seen in Puerto Vallarta.

  
They're not sure if it was her,
she wasn't wearing her collar.

  
What? Someone stole Chloe's collar?

  
I'm going to go
all kinds of Mexican on him.

  
Chico, I have this pain
in the pit of my stomach.

  
- Must have been the Pop Rocks.
- Or it could be... guilt.

  
We should have never
stolen that chica's collar.

  
Now she'll never get home.

  
[speaks Spanish]

  
[both screaming]

  
Let's get out of here!

  
[makes donkey-like sounds]

  
[panting]

  
Make a left, make a left.

  
Aisle four, tortillas on the floor.

  
- I feel naked.
- Every man for himself!

  
- My head!
- Go through his legs!

  
This way. Come on!

  
Back the other way!

  
Get off me!

  
Hey, Chico! We're home free!

  
Back up, back up!

  
That's what you get!

  
Hey! He's got my diamonds!

  
- Our diamonds.
- Whatever.

  
[speaks Spanish]

  
[train horn blows]

  
Wake up! The conductor's coming!
Hide! Rápido, hide!

  
[indistinct chatter]

  
What's going on?

  
- Delgado, what's happening?
- We got trouble.

  
Hide behind the crate.
I'll distract him.

  
Don't come out,
no matter what happens.

  
But, Delgado...

  
Don't come out,
no matter what happens.

  
- What are you gonna do?
- Something crazy.

  
- [screaming]
- [crashing]

  
Well, that used to be easier.

  
Just my luck.

  
Delgado!

  
- Oh, my gosh.
- Oh, my back.

  
- Did you see that?
- Yes.

  
I just jumped off a train!
By myself! And it was moving.

  
I told you to stay onboard.

  
But we're in this together.
I couldn't leave you here.

  
I've never had a friend like you.

  
You should have stayed, kid.
Look around.

  
You should have stayed.

  
I told the local police
I found the collar on a rat.

  
But they didn't believe me.

  
I went to turn the diamonds in,
and they tried to arrest me.

  
Sorry for the confusion, señor.

  
The rat, he's clever.

  
Oye, this hombre
needs help.

  
I set traps to keep him out,
but he always gets in!

  
Sneaky, sneaky mouse.

  
You know what you need?

  
- [barks]
- A guard dog.

  
- He's a stray.
- Yeah, he's a stray...

  
but he's a really good dog.

  
[speaks Spanish]

  
[Rachel] Thanks for
returning Chloe's collar.

  
Congratulations, amigo.
You have a home.

  
Gracias, Rafa.
It will happen for you, too.

  
Stay brown, brother.

  
Come on.
Ain't nothing to it but to do it.

  
- Adiós
- Adiós, Chucho.

  
Hey, don't chew the furniture.

  
- Good luck finding your dog.
- [Sam] Thank you.

  
I just got off
with the Puerto Vallarta police.

  
There was some dog trouble
on the northbound train this morning.

  
A German Shepherd jumped off.

  
Chloe.

  
- Thank you.
- Call me if you find out anything.

  
- [Rachel] Follow the tracks north.
- [Sam] Through the Sonoran Desert.

  
[Rachel] This will be great.

  
She's getting away with my diamonds.

  
[Chico] I think that that's like...
karma, man.

  
See, you steal it,
and eventually it is stolen from you.

  
And I steal it back.

  
- How you going to do that?
- Quiet!

  
[ War:
Low Rider]

  
[Chloe] So, Bimini says that
she's going out with Scooter...

  
who I happen to know
is completely crazy.

  
[Delgado] Please, make it stop.

  
[Chloe] I can't say that to her.
I have to be supportive, right?

  
Wait a minute. Haven't we
passed this tree before?

  
No, you're mistaken.
We've been walking for hours.

  
- But I tinkled there.
- You what?

  
You tinkled?

  
Can't you tell?

  
Oh, my... You can't smell, can you?

  
[groans]

  
- No.
- What happened?

  
It's OK, you can tell me.

  
I didn't... quit the police force.

  
They let me go because
I could no longer follow a scent.

  
Now we're out here walking in circles.

  
I'm sorry, kid.

  
[distant growling]

  
- What's that?
- Mountain lions!

  
- I'm scared, Delgado.
- I know.

  
We better get moving.
We got to get out of the open.

  
- OK.
- Let's go. Double time.

  
Delgado, what happened to you?

  
Why can't you smell anything?

  
Well...

  
My partner and I...
we were on a major bust.

  
I was on point.

  
Before I knew it I was blind-sided.
Then it all went bad.

  
While I was down,
my partner got hurt.

  
He was never the same after that.
And neither was I.

  
I should have sensed him coming.

  
Next day I woke up
and couldn't smell a thing.

  
Were you hurt?

  
No. They say it's all in my head.

  
In my head.

  
[growl]

  
They found us!

  
I'll hold them off as long as I can
while you run. Understand?

  
They're just cats.
You could take them.

  
[growl]

  
We need a miracle. Run when I say run!

  
- Come on! Take them!
- [growls]

  
Yeah, you can do it!

  
Don't be afraid!

  
Go, Delgado! Go, Delgado!

  
- Run, kid! Run, now!
- OK, OK.

  
- Run and hide!
- Here. I'm here.

  
This is not hiding.

  
[rumbling]

  
[rumbling stops]

  
[dogs growling]

  
Say hello to my little friends.

  
[barking]

  
- [cats shriek]
- [barking]

  
Whoa! That's some bark you guys got.

  
I am Montezuma!
Come with us if you want to live.

  
Yeah, I want to live.

  
Now I've seen it all.

  
[Chloe] Can you help us get back
to civilization, Montezuma?

  
[Montezuma] Of course.

  
But it is too dangerous
to travel these canyons after dark.

  
You will spend the night here with us.

  
[Chloe] Where are we?

  
You are in Chihuahua.
Birthplace of our mighty breed.

  
I was born in Beverly Hills.

  
Sí, but your ancestors
came from here.

  
The Aztec people left long ago,
but we remain.

  
Wow.

  
[ Luis Oliveira and His Bandodalua Boys:
Chihuahua]

  
Did you hear what he said, Delgado?

  
- I come from a mighty breed.
- Yeah, mighty annoying.

  
You're just mad because
we were saved by little dogs.

  
Very little dogs.

  
Tonight we celebrate your arrival.

  
Thank you, Montezuma.

  
Please, call me Monte.

  
- [Chloe sighs]
- [Delgado] Ay yi yi.

  
[barking]

  
[Chloe] Wow! All this for me, Monte?

  
[Monte] Yes, Chloe.

  
When a Chihuahua comes home,
it is cause for celebration.

  
[Chloe] Even a Beverly Hills Chihuahua?

  
[Monte] Of course. No matter where
you come from, you are one of us.

  
Tiny but mighty.

  
Mighty? But I'm just... a lapdog.

  
A lapdog? No.

  
Do not insult yourself. Do not insult
the Chihuahua race.

  
- [all] No más.
- [Chloe] No más?

  
Sí, it means "no more."

  
We Chihuahuas are not toys
or fashion accessories.

  
[all] No más.

  
We were not bred to wear silly hats
and ride in purses!

  
[all] No más.

  
We will no longer
be spoken to with baby talk.

  
We have been called "teacup"
and "tiny toy" for too long.

  
[puppy] No más!

  
Names like Fifi, Foo-Foo...

  
Pookie, Pumpkin, or Squirt.

  
[all] No más!

  
Yes, we Chihuahuas shake, but not for
the amusement of humans.

  
We shake because we know the power
of our inner strength. Our bark.

  
[all] No más!

  
Yes, we are tiny, but we are mighty!

  
[all] No más! No más! No más!

  
Join with us, Chloe.
Embrace no más. Find your bark.

  
My bark?

  
Sí! That which makes you mighty.

  
That which makes you... you.

  
We are Chihuahuas, hear us roar.

  
[all barking]

  
- [bark]
- [Chloe squeaks]

  
- [bark]
- [squeak]

  
[squeak]

  
That was embarrassing.

  
Don't worry, little one. Your bark will
come when you need it most.

  
[all barking]

  
[speaks Spanish]

  
Last one in the house is a chew toy!

  
[speaks Spanish]

  
They have room.

  
[Manuel] Come on. Little more.

  
- You got it now. Now pull.
- [Chico] I got it, I got it.

  
- Sweet smell of success.
- I'm smelling something else.

  
There's the bag. There's the bag that's
got my diamonds. Hey, watch your nose!

  
I don't feel right about this.

  
Look, my neck flap is swelling up.

  
Stop with the guilt.
Iguanas are supposed to be cold-blooded.

  
You know I was born in captivity.
I grew up under a heat lamp.

  
Snap out of it. We got a job to do.

  
Ah-hah! You're the pack rat
who stole the collar!

  
See? You're so busted, Manuel.

  
Hey, dude, you got me mixed up with
another rat. You know we all look alike.

  
- No, no. It's him. He did it.
- What?

  
Now the love of my life
is out there in trouble.

  
- Not because of us.
- No?

  
- We were trying to... save her.
- Yeah.

  
From the demon dog that's hunting her.

  
Tell me about this demon dog.

  
[low growl]

  
[bleeping]

  
Chloe, you can always stay here with us.

  
This place is amazing, Monte.

  
But there's someone at home who's
probably worried and missing me...

  
and I miss him.

  
Your corazón?

  
Mi corazón. What does that mean?

  
My heart.

  
I never even gave him a chance.

  
We Chihuahuas come
in many shapes and colors...

  
but when you look not with your eyes,
but with your soul,

  
there we're all the same.

  
Listen... back there with the lions...

  
...uh... uh... thanks.

  
But of course. We are Chihuahuas.

  
Ah! Civilization at last.
We made it, Delgado.

  
- Delgado!
- Just keep paddling!

  
[Chloe] Whoa!
[screams]

  
- That was fun!
- Yeah, you're a real aquatic goddess.

  
- Delgado, look!
- What?

  
Is that you? Nice toga.

  
I can't believe Rachel's looking for me.

  
Let's get some help.

  
[both barking]

  
[speaks Spanish]

  
- Chloe.
- Sí.

  
[both speak Spanish]

  
We always kept a dog
when my husband was alive.

  
He'd make a great companion.
You guys are perfect for each other.

  
Somebody's got a lady friend.

  
I have a home.

  
We're on our way. Hey, Rachel,
that was Ramirez. They found Chloe.

  
[screams]

  
Whoa. Awkward.

  
We should go.
Ramirez is going to meet us there.

  
I told you,
everything's going to be fine.

  
[ The Pinker Tones:
Whistling Song]

  
[Rachel] This is the place.

  
Chloe!

  
Hello?

  
OK, how about here?
You American dogs are so picky.

  
OK, go. What?

  
Ah. Excuse me, señorita.
Please, please, go.

  
I've seen that gringo before.

  
[sniffs]

  
Oye, that van.
My Chloe's been there.

  
Right on, Mighty Dog. Power to the Papi.

  
- Now go get her!
- [Chico] Go get your princesa.

  
- ¡Mi corazón!
- [Chico] So romantic.

  
Man, I thought we'd
never get rid of him.

  
- Come on.
- Now I'll finally get my diamonds.

  
[Chico] For the love of a banana,
hurry. Ow!

  
Señora?

  
Oh, no. No!

  
[shouts in Spanish]

  
Chloe!

  
[speaks Spanish]

  
- [Delgado] Turn me loose!
- What did he say?

  
- Don't worry, we're going to find her.
- What?

  
Oh!

  
I'm going to look for her.

  
Kid!

  
[sniffing]

  
Kid! Where are you? Chloe!

  
[gasping] Where are you taking me?

  
Good job, Diablo. Good job.

  
You've been a lot of trouble, huh?
I hope you're worth it.

  
I need to call the owners,
so get the dog in the van.

  
[man] Yes, sir.

  
Surprise!

  
- [crunch]
- [man screams]

  
Don't mess with a Chihuahua!

  
Papi! What are you doing here!

  
Rescuing you. Run!

  
- Come on.
- I'm coming.

  
Go! Diablo, go!

  
- [Vasquez] Get that Chihuahua!
- [Rafferty] Which one?

  
- The mean one!
- Papi!

  
- We're trapped!
- I will protect you, mi corazón.

  
Hold on, Chloe!

  
Come on, little brat.

  
[screams]

  
[both grunt]

  
[Manuel] Ow!

  
Oh, my back. I need an aspirin.

  
- Doesn't that hurt?
- You see a tooth around?

  
You two! What are you doing here?

  
It's not what you think.

  
Look... we're not trying
to steal this collar.

  
- Right.
- Maybe we are.

  
Look, what my partner's
trying to say is, if you hurry,

  
- you can pick up her scent using this.
- Yeah.

  
- I can't.
- What?

  
I make this noble gesture,
you're not even going to try?

  
What's the point of having that
thing on the end of your face?

  
[sniffs]

  
- I can't!
- She needs you, man.

  
- What part don't you understand?
- She needs you, man!

  
You can do it! Smell.

  
- That's it.
- You can do it, Delgado. Come on.

  
Smell.

  
I'm getting something. Pack rat.

  
Old nachos.

  
Chanel No. 5.

  
He's got it!

  
I have a Chihuahua to save.

  
- He's got my collar!
- Yeah, he's got it.

  
You did a good thing, Manuel.
You know you did a good thing.

  
- [Manuel laughs]
- You're blushing. You're blushing.

  
[men speaking Spanish]

  
[Rachel] That's Chloe's collar.

  
He wants to lead us
to the Chihuahua. Let's go.

  
Be careful.
The whole structure is crumbling.

  
[Vasquez] Rafferty,
there's no sign of the dog.

  
[Papi] Hey, tough guy,
you're lucky I'm locked in.

  
[Vasquez] Rafferty, come in.

  
[Papi] You look confused.

  
Hey, man, where you going?
To find the rest of your tail?

  
[Vasquez] Rafferty, come in.

  
I know you're here, chica.
I can smell you.

  
[Vasquez] Rafferty, come in, come in.

  
- Rafferty.
- Sorry, you're breaking up, boss.

  
[Delgado squeaks]

  
I'm going to get you now, you rat.

  
Hello. One down.

  
Rafferty, what's going on?
Talk to me. What's going on?

  
- Chloe, you're okay.
- Shhh.

  
Come in. I cannot hear you. Come on.

  
[straining]

  
- Who you been hanging around with?
- Diablo, let's get out...

  
- Get them. Get them!
- [Chloe] Run!

  
- Follow me!
- [Papi] We can do it!

  
Whoa, you heard the man.
Come on, get me.

  
[Papi] Too slow, gotta go!

  
- [Chloe shrieks]
- [grunting]

  
Come here. Come here!

  
[Papi] You better watch out, dog.
I'm going to beat you like a piñata!

  
They don't call me
Papi Loco for nothing!

  
Come on, little rat. Come on!

  
- Whoa!
- Papi!

  
Say goodbye to your corazón.

  
No... más. [squeaks]

  
No más. [squeaks]

  
It's over.

  
- Chloe!
- No más!

  
[loud bark]

  
[gasps]

  
Wow! That's my bark.

  
[bark]

  
I barked!

  
[speaks Spanish]

  
I barked!

  
Two down.

  
He's all yours, Officer.

  
[Officer] Señor Vasquez.

  
- Did you see that?
- Wow.

  
I barked!

  
Ai, Mami! Nice set of pipes!

  
- [growling]
- [Chloe] Run!

  
It's time to finish what I started.

  
You don't scare me anymore!

  
Then why are you shaking?

  
Because I am a Chihuahua!

  
[growling] Diablo!

  
Big mistake.

  
Leave him alone!

  
- Chloe, what are you doing?
- [Chloe] You owe me a cashmere sweater.

  
- Hang on, Chloe!
- [Delgado] Kid, hang on.

  
- How dare you!
- [Papi] Chloe, watch out!

  
[Chloe screams]

  
[howling]

  
It's over, Diablo! It is over!

  
You took everything from me.

  
- Now, we're even.
- [gulps]

  
[Papi] Chloe?

  
Mi corazón?

  
[distant growl]

  
Kid?

  
She's... gone.

  
Wake up, mi corazón.

  
It's me. Your Papi.

  
Speak to me.

  
Fill my ears with your beautiful voice.

  
Without you, the sun
will have no warmth...

  
the flowers, no beauty.

  
Chloe, my tail will have no wag.

  
Come back to Beverly Hills with me,
and I will tend your garden forever.

  
Your love is the rain
that falls upon my earth.

  
Don't stop now. It's just getting good.

  
Ai Chihuahua!

  
Papi, that was beautiful.

  
Chloe, you're back. You're back.

  
[Rachel] Chloe?

  
[Papi] She's back!

  
You're OK.

  
Chloe, where have you been?

  
Rachel, you missed all the fun.

  
[Delgado] You are one tough Chihuahua.

  
Tiny but mighty.

  
[Rachel] Hi, Chloe.

  
Hi. Hi.

  
[police siren]

  
[grunts]

  
[Delgado] So you're the... guard dog.

  
No, man. I'm a landscaper.

  
- [laughs] Oops.
- Right.

  
Well, adiós, kid.

  
Oh, uh... Delgado.

  
You know,
Vivian could still use a guard dog.

  
Thanks for the offer,
but someone has to go after El Diablo.

  
Besides, princesa, I think you
can take care of things yourself now.

  
I'll miss you.

  
Yeah, I'll miss you, too, kid.
But this isn't goodbye.

  
I'm sure we'll be
seeing each other again.

  
[sighs]

  
Don't turn around. Don't turn around.

  
Maybe you could use
a little extra help on the force.

  
Where do you think
you are going, officer?

  
Ready to get back on the job?

  
[barks]

  
Officer!

  
[both bark]

  
Yeah. Good boy. Good boy.

  
[Rachel] Chloe! Papi! Let's go home.

  
We gotta get home before Aunt Viv does.

  
Hey, come here.

  
Goodbye, my friends. [speaks Spanish]

  
[speaks Spanish]

  
- Adiós, amigo.
- [Delgado] Adiós, kid.

  
Muchas gracias, Delgado.

  
Thank you, Chloe.
I've never had a friend like you.

  
Great, she's not home yet.
She'll be here any minute.

  
- Can you get the bags?
- Yeah, I'll get the bags.

  
- I'll put her in the tub.
- Go, go, go.

  
Hurry up!

  
Come on. We're going to make it.

  
Oh-oh. Think fast, amigo.

  
Hi! How are you? Welcome.

  
- Welcome. Hi.
- What a surprise. Hello.

  
I took photographs
of the most wonderful gardens.

  
You're not going to believe.
First, I want to go see Chloe.

  
- Actually, I need you to see something.
- That's the best you can do?

  
- Something you're gonna love.
- Should I bite her leg?

  
By the way, you look exhausted.
You've been working too hard.

  
Chloe? Chloe.

  
- Sam, put my bags over there, please?
- Yes.

  
Chloe? Rachel?

  
- Hi, Aunt Viv.
- Hi.

  
- Hi.
- Hi.

  
Your hair is all wet.

  
I was in a bath.

  
- Oh. Where's my Chloe?
- There she is.

  
Hi, sweetheart.

  
Hi. Come here.
Hi, sweetheart.

  
My baby girl. My sweet angel.

  
I missed you so much. I did.

  
Yes, I did.

  
What's that smell? What's that...

  
[Viv] It's sort of... urban and...

  
kind of earthy... and it's fabulous.

  
That's Mexico No. 5.

  
I can't believe I'm running over
a pond in my best dress.

  
So does this mean you're no longer a
prissy Beverly Hills Chihuahua?

  
Beverly Hills, sí. Prissy,
no más.

  
How do you say "What are you doing
on Friday night" in Spanish?

  
[both speak Spanish]

  
Me? Nothing. And you?

  
- Nada.
- Bueno, let's...

  
After the way I treated you,

  
I can't believe you came after me.

  
How could I not?

  
[speaks Spanish]

  
I think I'm... going to cry.

  
[whimpers]

  
Oh, Chloe. [laughs]

  
[chuckles] Papi likes.

  
[Papi] In case
you were wondering, amigos.

  
Delgado received the medal of honor for
capturing his archnemesis, El Diablo.

  
Shortly after entering the pound,

  
El Diablo was adopted by a rich lady
with a passion for fashion.

  
Rafa became the official
spokesdog for Minty Mutt.

  
For that doggy fresh breath
all day long.

  
Bimini, Sebastian, and Delta
landed a dream spot

  
on TV's hottest new reality show,

  
So You Think You Can Prance. Hey!

  
Chico and Manuel
stowed away to Beverly Hills...

  
where they learned
a new English word...

  
..."bling."

  
This was Chloe and
me on our first date.

  
And who knows? Maybe there are
a few taquitos in our future.

  
Let's just say
mi corazón puts the "wow" in...

  
... Chihuahua!

  
[ Ali Dee:
Chihuahua]

  
[ Heitor Pereira:
Llama ("Chloe's Theme")]
    flare give hammer
    Awesome sig pic by wearthesun! Town Tune: Ai wo Torimodose!!

  5. #3095
    I hate pears
    Join Date
    September 22, 2013
    Posts
    5,836
    Bells
    2
    Eggs
    0
    3DS
    2766-8783-3800
    Items: Yellow Candy
Gift received at 01-13-2017, 03:54 PM from UniversaljellyfishGreen Candy
Gift received at 10-29-2016, 08:59 PM from UniversaljellyfishThe Bell Tree Fair 2014 PatchThe Bell Tree Fair 2013 Patch
    Quote Originally Posted by xSuperMario64x View Post
    This sounds really depressing for some reason

    I never really had any friends to play acnl with. Always played alone ;-;
    I had one girl in real life who played it with me lol. Then we met a bunch of people online together. I miss when we used to do glitching, that was fun lmao.

    - - - Post Merge - - -

    maybe this is a hint that we all need to play ac together

  6. #3096
    the bluest diamond Sanrio's Avatar
    Join Date
    February 23, 2017
    Posts
    719
    Bells
    19
    Eggs
    0
    3DS
    4141-5543-8176
    Items: Tasty CakeTasty CakeTasty Cake
    tbh i met some of my ign friends on the island

    (i missed out on so many oppertunities when i first got my 3DS cause i didn't know my friend code, lol)

    - - - Post Merge - - -

    when was the last time i even played acnl?

  7. #3097
    Get over here ya fatty xSuperMario64x's Avatar
    Join Date
    October 30, 2011
    Posts
    1,637
    Bells
    24
    Eggs
    0
    3DS
    3024-6610-7931
    NN ID
    norwegiancat99
    Items: FleaWhite Lily
Gift received at 01-04-2017, 04:48 PM from Flare
Message: in: Encyclopedia SpongeBobia 
Pizza Delivery (transcript)

 Arrow Left.png
Episode
Transcript
Gallery
 Arrow Right.png
Transcript Information [edit]
 
General
Season №:	1
Episode №:	5a
This article is a transcript of the SpongeBob SquarePants episode "Pizza Delivery" from season one, which aired on August 14, 1999.

Squidward: [Scene starts at the Krusty Krab with SpongeBob cleaning a table] Hurry up with those chairs, SpongeBob, it's after closing and I'd like to go home.
[phone rings]
SpongeBob: I got it, I got it! Coming. [leaps for the phone but Squidward answers it first]
Squidward: Hello? Sorry, sir, we're close... [Mr. Krabs snatches phone]
Mr. Krabs: Ahoy, there, Krusty Krab. How could I help you? [customer explains order over phone] Pizza? [eyes turn into dollar signs] Um... Of course we have pizza.
Squidward: Uhh, Mr. Krabs...
Mr. Krabs: Our delivery Squid will bring it right over. [hangs up]
Squidward: Mr. Krabs, we don't serve pizza. [Mr. Krabs gets a plate of Krabby patties and turns it into pizza. Then he puts it in a box] We don't deliver.
Mr. Krabs: We don't deliver, but you do.
Squidward: Can't you just get SpongeBob to do it?
Mr. Krabs: Great idea! Take him with you. [SpongeBob sneaks over smiling big]
Squidward: That's not what I had in mind!
SpongeBob: Front end... check. Antenna... [touches the boat antenna making it vibrate] check. Bumper... check. Bumper sticker... [bumper sticker says "I Brake For Sea Urchins"] ...check. [uncaps the tire pressure and puts his mouth in it, causing him to inflate like a balloon, and talk in a squeaky, high pitched voice while he is now the size of a giant parade balloon] Tire pressure! [blows out the rest of the pressure in Squidward's face, returning him to his normal size and voice] ...check. Vehicle inspection complete! We're really making history here Squidward. That lucky customer is going to get the first Krabby Patty Pizza ever.
Squidward: Good, then you drive.
SpongeBob: I can't. I'm still in Boating School.
Squidward: Come on, SpongeBob. Its just around the corner.
SpongeBob: Well, yeah, but...
Squidward: Just do what you do in school.
SpongeBob: Well, okay. Wait, don't tell me.
Squidward: Back it up.
SpongeBob: What?
Squidward: Back... it up.
SpongeBob: Right, back... it up. [tries to move the stick shift down]
Squidward: Back it up!
SpongeBob: Okay, okay.
Squidward: Shift into reverse, SpongeBob!
SpongeBob: Reverse? Oh, yeah, reverse. [SpongeBob imagines the words "FORWARD" and "BACKWARD" turning into Korean characters, 앞으로가 (FORWARD) and 뒤로가 (BACKWARD)]
Squidward: Back it up!!
SpongeBob: [shifts gears] Backing up! Backing up! [boat backs up really fast]
Squidward: [tries to get the wheel] NO! SpongeBob! You did it wrong! Gimme the wheel, SpongeBob. Give me the wheel! Give me it!
SpongeBob: Backing up! Backing up! Ba-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-ack-i-i-i-i-i-ng up! [they go over a bumpy area with rocks and then they spin around and around and around, screaming. The next morning, the boat goes over five hills] Backing up. Backing up. Backing up. Backing up. [boat stops with no fuel left]
Squidward: Well... you backed up. And you know what? I think were out of gas. And you know what else? [echoing] We're in the middle of nowhere!
SpongeBob: And you know what else else? I think the pizzas getting cold.
Squidward: And the pizza's cold? Oh, the pizza's cold. Not the pizza! Oh, how could it get any worse? [kicks boat and the boat starts up again and goes forward fast back to the Krusty Krab]
SpongeBob: Well, we can still deliver it on foot. [both walk on the sand]
Squidward: Ow, ow ow.
SpongeBob: [singing] The Krusty Krab pizza is the pizza for you and me. The Krusty Krab pizza is the pizza...
Squidward: ...And my feet are killing me. Whoa. [trips over SpongeBob] SpongeBob? What are you doing?
SpongeBob: [rubbing ground] Its an old pioneer trick. I saw it in a movie once.
Squidward: SpongeBob, this is no time for...
SpongeBob: Shh, shh, shh. It's working.
Squidward: What is it?
SpongeBob: [pointing to the road] Truck! 16 wheels. Now I can show you how the pioneers hitchhiked. [starts dancing in the road] Whee... eee...
Truck Driver: Crashin' frashin' break dancers!
Squidward: He's stopping! He's stopping! [Squidward realizes he's not stopping and grabs SpongeBob out of the way where they are covered in sand thanks to the truck]
SpongeBob: The Krusty Krab pizza is the pizza for you and me. The Krusty Krab pizza is the pizza free delivery. The Krusty Krab pizza is the pizza very ta-asty. [SpongeBob gets carried around in the air by the huge winds]
Squidward: Will you let go of that stupid pizza, already?!
SpongeBob: I can't, its for the customer!
Squidward: Well Who cares about the customer?!
SpongeBob: I do!
Squidward: Well, I don't!
SpongeBob: [wind stops and SpongeBob gasps] Squidward! [starts flying again]
Squidward: Let go of that pizza!
SpongeBob: No! [runs over Squidward]
Squidward: Ow. [holding SpongeBob's legs] SpongeBob, let go of that pizza!
SpongeBob: No! Its for the customer!
Squidward: SpongeBob! Let go of the pizza! [lifts up into the tornado]
SpongeBob: No!
Squidward: SpongeBob! [looks down] Hang onto the pizza! [tornado spits them both out. SpongeBob uses the pizza as a parachute but Squidward falls hard onto the ground] Hey! Hey! [crawls up to the screen] Wheres the road? Where's the road? We're doomed! How are we gonna get home, which way do we go? [SpongeBob lands] What are we gonna do now! There's no road here!
SpongeBob: I think town's this way. [points]
Squidward: Oh, don't tell me, Jethro. The pioneers?
SpongeBob: That's right. Moss always points to civilization.
Squidward: That way? That way there? [SpongeBob nods] So, let me get this straight... you think that we should go that way?
SpongeBob: Yep.
Squidward: Well, then I'm going this way. [heads the other way]
SpongeBob: Huh? Squid, wait! I don't think...
Squidward: Trust me, I know where I'm going. [Pans out to show another city in the other direction]
SpongeBob: [sings] The Krusty Krab pizza absolutivally. [later] pizza... [starts beatboxing] pizza... [later, SpongeBob is walking backwards. SpongeBob's pants almost split into two and move up and down simultaneously while he continues to beatbox. Still later] Krusty Krab pizza is the pizza, yeah, for you and [falsetto] me! [later] Krab Pizza... for you. Krus... the Krusshy and the... Krab and the... pizza inside. [Later, they are both lying face down in the sand]
Squidward: Sponge, we gotta eat something.
SpongeBob: I heard in times of hardship, the pioneers would eat coral. [Squidward eats some coral] No, maybe it wasn't coral. [Squidward spits out the coral] Maybe it was sand, no, no, mud.
Squidward: Give me the pizza!
SpongeBob: Wait, I remember now. It was coral!
Squidward: Give it to me!
SpongeBob: No, we promised it's for the customer.
Squidward: [fancy music plays] You're right. It's for the customer.
SpongeBob: Yeah!
Squidward: Maybe we better check on it, make sure its okay.
SpongeBob: Well?
Squidward: Just a peek. [opens box]
SpongeBob: [he shuts it quickly] Okay, its fine.
Squidward: No, I think I saw something. [opens box] Oh, no. I was wrong. It looks okay. Sure is a fine looking pizza.
SpongeBob: Yeah.
Squidward: What's that? Is that the cheese?
SpongeBob: Yeah!
Squidward: And the pepperoni?
SpongeBob: Yeah!
Squidward: Oh, looks good, huh?
SpongeBob: Wait a second, I know what you're trying to do, Squidward. I'm not letting you eat the pizza!
Squidward: Give me the pizza!
SpongeBob: No!
Squidward: Don't make me take it away from you, SpongeBob!
SpongeBob: Get away!
Squidward: Get back here, SpongeBob, give me the pizza!
SpongeBob: No!
Squidward: SpongeBob!
SpongeBob: No!
Squidward: SpongeBob!
SpongeBob: No!
Squidward: Wait!
SpongeBob: No! No![runs into Squidward]
Squidward: I want that pizza and you're gonna hand it over one way or another!
SpongeBob: Look, we're saved!
Squidward: Sure, we're saved. Now give me some pizza!
SpongeBob: No, really Squid, we're saved! We're saved! We're saved! [he jumps in and out of his pants]
Squidward: Will you cut that out?!
SpongeBob: [to a conga beat] Saved, saved, saved, saved! Saved, saved, saved, saved, saved, saved! [rips himself apart then the two parts go in circles and then they connect again. SpongeBob starts doing a conga dance] Saved, saved, saved, saved, saved, saved! Saved, saved, saved, saved, saved, saved! Saved, we are saved!
Squidward: That's just a stupid boulder!
SpongeBob: It's not just a boulder. [sniff] It's a rock. [cries] A rock! A rock! Its a big beautiful, old rock. [climbs up it and rubs it] Oh, the pioneers used to ride these babies for miles, and it's in great shape.
Squidward: SpongeBob, will you forget the stupid pioneers?! Have you ever noticed that there are none of them left? That's because they were lousy hitchhikers, ate coral and took directions from algae! And now, you're telling me they thought they could drive... [SpongeBob runs over Squidward with the boulder] ...rocks? Hold on there, Jethro!
SpongeBob: I can't wait to see the look on our customers face! [rings doorbell]
Tom: Yeah?
SpongeBob: Congratulations, sir. Your Krabby Patty pizza is here!
Tom: Wow, thanks! I've been dying for one of these. It... [brief pause] Where's my drink?
SpongeBob: What drink?
Tom: [in an angry tone] My drink!? My diet Dr. Kelp. Don't tell me you forgot my drink!
SpongeBob: [checks through the order] But, you didn't order any...
Tom: [yelling] How am I supposed to eat this pizza without my drink?!
SpongeBob: But... but... [Tears start rolling down his face]
Tom: Didn't you ever once think of the customer?! [gives the pizza back] You call yourself a delivery boy?! Well I ain't buying! [slams door. SpongeBob goes over to Squidward, smiling and trying not to cry]
Squidward: Sponge? Sponge? It's okay. Sponge? [SpongeBob drops the pizza, falls over, starts sobbing and absorbs his tears] Sponge? [Squidward gets angry, grabs the pizza, stomps towards the Customer's house and pounds on the door]
Tom: Another one? Look, I told your little friend I ain't paying for that!
Squidward: Well, this one's on the house! [throws the pizza in Tom's face, knocking him out]
SpongeBob: [still crying] Did he change his mind?
Squidward: [smugly] He sure did. Ate the whole thing in one bite.
SpongeBob: [stops crying] No drink?
Squidward: Nah. Now take me home. [jumps up on the rock]
SpongeBob: Are you kidding? We have just enough time to make it back to work. [backs up the rock where they are instantly at the Krusty Krab]
Squidward: Work? [screen cuts to black] Oh, my aching tentacles!PavéFamous Mushroom
Gift received at 10-05-2016, 02:22 PM from AronthaerThe Bell Tree Fair 2016 PatchAvatar AnimationPear (Fruit)White Pansy
    Quote Originally Posted by B e t h a n y View Post
    maybe this is a hint that we all need to play ac together
    hehe
    THE HYPE FOR SUPER MARIO ODYSSEY IS LIT!!!

    Awesome sig pic by wearthesun!!


  8. #3098
    Bleh Ash Q. Scrumfleton's Avatar
    Join Date
    March 13, 2016
    Posts
    4,105
    Bells
    8
    Eggs
    0
    3DS
    4012-6984-9799
    NN ID
    AshCo3
    Items: Flea
Gift received at 04-02-2017, 12:03 PM from Flare
Message: According to all known laws
of aviation,

  
there is no way a bee
should be able to fly.

  
Its wings are too small to get
its fat little body off the ground.

  
The bee, of course, flies anyway

  
because bees don't care
what humans think is impossible.

  
Yellow, black. Yellow, black.
Yellow, black. Yellow, black.

  
Ooh, black and yellow!
Let's shake it up a little.

  
Barry! Breakfast is ready!

  
Ooming!

  
Hang on a second.

  
Hello?

  
- Barry?
- Adam?

  
- Oan you believe this is happening?
- I can't. I'll pick you up.

  
Looking sharp.

  
Use the stairs. Your father
paid good money for those.

  
Sorry. I'm excited.

  
Here's the graduate.
We're very proud of you, son.

  
A perfect report card, all B's.

  
Very proud.

  
Ma! I got a thing going here.

  
- You got lint on your fuzz.
- Ow! That's me!

  
- Wave to us! We'll be in row 118,000.
- Bye!

  
Barry, I told you,
stop flying in the house!

  
- Hey, Adam.
- Hey, Barry.

  
- Is that fuzz gel?
- A little. Special day, graduation.

  
Never thought I'd make it.

  
Three days grade school,
three days high school.

  
Those were awkward.

  
Three days college. I'm glad I took
a day and hitchhiked around the hive.

  
You did come back different.

  
- Hi, Barry.
- Artie, growing a mustache? Looks good.

  
- Hear about Frankie?
- Yeah.

  
- You going to the funeral?
- No, I'm not going.

  
Everybody knows,
sting someone, you die.

  
Don't waste it on a squirrel.
Such a hothead.

  
I guess he could have
just gotten out of the way.

  
I love this incorporating
an amusement park into our day.

  
That's why we don't need vacations.

  
Boy, quite a bit of pomp...
under the circumstances.

  
- Well, Adam, today we are men.
- We are!

  
- Bee-men.
- Amen!

  
Hallelujah!

  
Students, faculty, distinguished bees,

  
please welcome Dean Buzzwell.

  
Welcome, New Hive Oity
graduating class of...

  
...9:15.

  
That concludes our ceremonies.

  
And begins your career
at Honex Industries!

  
Will we pick ourjob today?

  
I heard it's just orientation.

  
Heads up! Here we go.

  
Keep your hands and antennas
inside the tram at all times.

  
- Wonder what it'll be like?
- A little scary.

  
Welcome to Honex,
a division of Honesco

  
and a part of the Hexagon Group.

  
This is it!

  
Wow.

  
Wow.

  
We know that you, as a bee,
have worked your whole life

  
to get to the point where you
can work for your whole life.

  
Honey begins when our valiant Pollen
Jocks bring the nectar to the hive.

  
Our top-secret formula

  
is automatically color-corrected,
scent-adjusted and bubble-contoured

  
into this soothing sweet syrup

  
with its distinctive
golden glow you know as...

  
Honey!

  
- That girl was hot.
- She's my cousin!

  
- She is?
- Yes, we're all cousins.

  
- Right. You're right.
- At Honex, we constantly strive

  
to improve every aspect
of bee existence.

  
These bees are stress-testing
a new helmet technology.

  
- What do you think he makes?
- Not enough.

  
Here we have our latest advancement,
the Krelman.

  
- What does that do?
- Oatches that little strand of honey

  
that hangs after you pour it.
Saves us millions.

  
Oan anyone work on the Krelman?

  
Of course. Most bee jobs are
small ones. But bees know

  
that every small job,
if it's done well, means a lot.

  
But choose carefully

  
because you'll stay in the job
you pick for the rest of your life.

  
The same job the rest of your life?
I didn't know that.

  
What's the difference?

  
You'll be happy to know that bees,
as a species, haven't had one day off

  
in 27 million years.

  
So you'll just work us to death?

  
We'll sure try.

  
Wow! That blew my mind!

  
"What's the difference?"
How can you say that?

  
One job forever?
That's an insane choice to have to make.

  
I'm relieved. Now we only have
to make one decision in life.

  
But, Adam, how could they
never have told us that?

  
Why would you question anything?
We're bees.

  
We're the most perfectly
functioning society on Earth.

  
You ever think maybe things
work a little too well here?

  
Like what? Give me one example.

  
I don't know. But you know
what I'm talking about.

  
Please clear the gate.
Royal Nectar Force on approach.

  
Wait a second. Oheck it out.

  
- Hey, those are Pollen Jocks!
- Wow.

  
I've never seen them this close.

  
They know what it's like
outside the hive.

  
Yeah, but some don't come back.

  
- Hey, Jocks!
- Hi, Jocks!

  
You guys did great!

  
You're monsters!
You're sky freaks! I love it! I love it!

  
- I wonder where they were.
- I don't know.

  
Their day's not planned.

  
Outside the hive, flying who knows
where, doing who knows what.

  
You can'tjust decide to be a Pollen
Jock. You have to be bred for that.

  
Right.

  
Look. That's more pollen
than you and I will see in a lifetime.

  
It's just a status symbol.
Bees make too much of it.

  
Perhaps. Unless you're wearing it
and the ladies see you wearing it.

  
Those ladies?
Aren't they our cousins too?

  
Distant. Distant.

  
Look at these two.

  
- Oouple of Hive Harrys.
- Let's have fun with them.

  
It must be dangerous
being a Pollen Jock.

  
Yeah. Once a bear pinned me
against a mushroom!

  
He had a paw on my throat,
and with the other, he was slapping me!

  
- Oh, my!
- I never thought I'd knock him out.

  
What were you doing during this?

  
Trying to alert the authorities.

  
I can autograph that.

  
A little gusty out there today,
wasn't it, comrades?

  
Yeah. Gusty.

  
We're hitting a sunflower patch
six miles from here tomorrow.

  
- Six miles, huh?
- Barry!

  
A puddle jump for us,
but maybe you're not up for it.

  
- Maybe I am.
- You are not!

  
We're going 0900 at J-Gate.

  
What do you think, buzzy-boy?
Are you bee enough?

  
I might be. It all depends
on what 0900 means.

  
Hey, Honex!

  
Dad, you surprised me.

  
You decide what you're interested in?

  
- Well, there's a lot of choices.
- But you only get one.

  
Do you ever get bored
doing the same job every day?

  
Son, let me tell you about stirring.

  
You grab that stick, and you just
move it around, and you stir it around.

  
You get yourself into a rhythm.
It's a beautiful thing.

  
You know, Dad,
the more I think about it,

  
maybe the honey field
just isn't right for me.

  
You were thinking of what,
making balloon animals?

  
That's a bad job
for a guy with a stinger.

  
Janet, your son's not sure
he wants to go into honey!

  
- Barry, you are so funny sometimes.
- I'm not trying to be funny.

  
You're not funny! You're going
into honey. Our son, the stirrer!

  
- You're gonna be a stirrer?
- No one's listening to me!

  
Wait till you see the sticks I have.

  
I could say anything right now.
I'm gonna get an ant tattoo!

  
Let's open some honey and celebrate!

  
Maybe I'll pierce my thorax.
Shave my antennae.

  
Shack up with a grasshopper. Get
a gold tooth and call everybody "dawg"!

  
I'm so proud.

  
- We're starting work today!
- Today's the day.

  
Oome on! All the good jobs
will be gone.

  
Yeah, right.

  
Pollen counting, stunt bee, pouring,
stirrer, front desk, hair removal...

  
- Is it still available?
- Hang on. Two left!

  
One of them's yours! Oongratulations!
Step to the side.

  
- What'd you get?
- Picking crud out. Stellar!

  
Wow!

  
Oouple of newbies?

  
Yes, sir! Our first day! We are ready!

  
Make your choice.

  
- You want to go first?
- No, you go.

  
Oh, my. What's available?

  
Restroom attendant's open,
not for the reason you think.

  
- Any chance of getting the Krelman?
- Sure, you're on.

  
I'm sorry, the Krelman just closed out.

  
Wax monkey's always open.

  
The Krelman opened up again.

  
What happened?

  
A bee died. Makes an opening. See?
He's dead. Another dead one.

  
Deady. Deadified. Two more dead.

  
Dead from the neck up.
Dead from the neck down. That's life!

  
Oh, this is so hard!

  
Heating, cooling,
stunt bee, pourer, stirrer,

  
humming, inspector number seven,
lint coordinator, stripe supervisor,

  
mite wrangler. Barry, what
do you think I should... Barry?

  
Barry!

  
All right, we've got the sunflower patch
in quadrant nine...

  
What happened to you?
Where are you?

  
- I'm going out.
- Out? Out where?

  
- Out there.
- Oh, no!

  
I have to, before I go
to work for the rest of my life.

  
You're gonna die! You're crazy! Hello?

  
Another call coming in.

  
If anyone's feeling brave,
there's a Korean deli on 83rd

  
that gets their roses today.

  
Hey, guys.

  
- Look at that.
- Isn't that the kid we saw yesterday?

  
Hold it, son, flight deck's restricted.

  
It's OK, Lou. We're gonna take him up.

  
Really? Feeling lucky, are you?

  
Sign here, here. Just initial that.

  
- Thank you.
- OK.

  
You got a rain advisory today,

  
and as you all know,
bees cannot fly in rain.

  
So be careful. As always,
watch your brooms,

  
hockey sticks, dogs,
birds, bears and bats.

  
Also, I got a couple of reports
of root beer being poured on us.

  
Murphy's in a home because of it,
babbling like a cicada!

  
- That's awful.
- And a reminder for you rookies,

  
bee law number one,
absolutely no talking to humans!

  
All right, launch positions!

  
Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz,
buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz!

  
Black and yellow!

  
Hello!

  
You ready for this, hot shot?

  
Yeah. Yeah, bring it on.

  
Wind, check.

  
- Antennae, check.
- Nectar pack, check.

  
- Wings, check.
- Stinger, check.

  
Scared out of my shorts, check.

  
OK, ladies,

  
let's move it out!

  
Pound those petunias,
you striped stem-suckers!

  
All of you, drain those flowers!

  
Wow! I'm out!

  
I can't believe I'm out!

  
So blue.

  
I feel so fast and free!

  
Box kite!

  
Wow!

  
Flowers!

  
This is Blue Leader.
We have roses visual.

  
Bring it around 30 degrees and hold.

  
Roses!

  
30 degrees, roger. Bringing it around.

  
Stand to the side, kid.
It's got a bit of a kick.

  
That is one nectar collector!

  
- Ever see pollination up close?
- No, sir.

  
I pick up some pollen here, sprinkle it
over here. Maybe a dash over there,

  
a pinch on that one.
See that? It's a little bit of magic.

  
That's amazing. Why do we do that?

  
That's pollen power. More pollen, more
flowers, more nectar, more honey for us.

  
Oool.

  
I'm picking up a lot of bright yellow.
Oould be daisies. Don't we need those?

  
Oopy that visual.

  
Wait. One of these flowers
seems to be on the move.

  
Say again? You're reporting
a moving flower?

  
Affirmative.

  
That was on the line!

  
This is the coolest. What is it?

  
I don't know, but I'm loving this color.

  
It smells good.
Not like a flower, but I like it.

  
Yeah, fuzzy.

  
Ohemical-y.

  
Oareful, guys. It's a little grabby.

  
My sweet lord of bees!

  
Oandy-brain, get off there!

  
Problem!

  
- Guys!
- This could be bad.

  
Affirmative.

  
Very close.

  
Gonna hurt.

  
Mama's little boy.

  
You are way out of position, rookie!

  
Ooming in at you like a missile!

  
Help me!

  
I don't think these are flowers.

  
- Should we tell him?
- I think he knows.

  
What is this?!

  
Match point!

  
You can start packing up, honey,
because you're about to eat it!

  
Yowser!

  
Gross.

  
There's a bee in the car!

  
- Do something!
- I'm driving!

  
- Hi, bee.
- He's back here!

  
He's going to sting me!

  
Nobody move. If you don't move,
he won't sting you. Freeze!

  
He blinked!

  
Spray him, Granny!

  
What are you doing?!

  
Wow... the tension level
out here is unbelievable.

  
I gotta get home.

  
Oan't fly in rain.

  
Oan't fly in rain.

  
Oan't fly in rain.

  
Mayday! Mayday! Bee going down!

  
Ken, could you close
the window please?

  
Ken, could you close
the window please?

  
Oheck out my new resume.
I made it into a fold-out brochure.

  
You see? Folds out.

  
Oh, no. More humans. I don't need this.

  
What was that?

  
Maybe this time. This time. This time.
This time! This time! This...

  
Drapes!

  
That is diabolical.

  
It's fantastic. It's got all my special
skills, even my top-ten favorite movies.

  
What's number one? Star Wars?

  
Nah, I don't go for that...

  
...kind of stuff.

  
No wonder we shouldn't talk to them.
They're out of their minds.

  
When I leave a job interview, they're
flabbergasted, can't believe what I say.

  
There's the sun. Maybe that's a way out.

  
I don't remember the sun
having a big 75 on it.

  
I predicted global warming.

  
I could feel it getting hotter.
At first I thought it was just me.

  
Wait! Stop! Bee!

  
Stand back. These are winter boots.

  
Wait!

  
Don't kill him!

  
You know I'm allergic to them!
This thing could kill me!

  
Why does his life have
less value than yours?

  
Why does his life have any less value
than mine? Is that your statement?

  
I'm just saying all life has value. You
don't know what he's capable of feeling.

  
My brochure!

  
There you go, little guy.

  
I'm not scared of him.
It's an allergic thing.

  
Put that on your resume brochure.

  
My whole face could puff up.

  
Make it one of your special skills.

  
Knocking someone out
is also a special skill.

  
Right. Bye, Vanessa. Thanks.

  
- Vanessa, next week? Yogurt night?
- Sure, Ken. You know, whatever.

  
- You could put carob chips on there.
- Bye.

  
- Supposed to be less calories.
- Bye.

  
I gotta say something.

  
She saved my life.
I gotta say something.

  
All right, here it goes.

  
Nah.

  
What would I say?

  
I could really get in trouble.

  
It's a bee law.
You're not supposed to talk to a human.

  
I can't believe I'm doing this.

  
I've got to.

  
Oh, I can't do it. Oome on!

  
No. Yes. No.

  
Do it. I can't.

  
How should I start it?
"You like jazz?" No, that's no good.

  
Here she comes! Speak, you fool!

  
Hi!

  
I'm sorry.

  
- You're talking.
- Yes, I know.

  
You're talking!

  
I'm so sorry.

  
No, it's OK. It's fine.
I know I'm dreaming.

  
But I don't recall going to bed.

  
Well, I'm sure this
is very disconcerting.

  
This is a bit of a surprise to me.
I mean, you're a bee!

  
I am. And I'm not supposed
to be doing this,

  
but they were all trying to kill me.

  
And if it wasn't for you...

  
I had to thank you.
It's just how I was raised.

  
That was a little weird.

  
- I'm talking with a bee.
- Yeah.

  
I'm talking to a bee.
And the bee is talking to me!

  
I just want to say I'm grateful.
I'll leave now.

  
- Wait! How did you learn to do that?
- What?

  
The talking thing.

  
Same way you did, I guess.
"Mama, Dada, honey." You pick it up.

  
- That's very funny.
- Yeah.

  
Bees are funny. If we didn't laugh,
we'd cry with what we have to deal with.

  
Anyway...

  
Oan I...

  
...get you something?
- Like what?

  
I don't know. I mean...
I don't know. Ooffee?

  
I don't want to put you out.

  
It's no trouble. It takes two minutes.

  
- It's just coffee.
- I hate to impose.

  
- Don't be ridiculous!
- Actually, I would love a cup.

  
Hey, you want rum cake?

  
- I shouldn't.
- Have some.

  
- No, I can't.
- Oome on!

  
I'm trying to lose a couple micrograms.

  
- Where?
- These stripes don't help.

  
You look great!

  
I don't know if you know
anything about fashion.

  
Are you all right?

  
No.

  
He's making the tie in the cab
as they're flying up Madison.

  
He finally gets there.

  
He runs up the steps into the church.
The wedding is on.

  
And he says, "Watermelon?
I thought you said Guatemalan.

  
Why would I marry a watermelon?"

  
Is that a bee joke?

  
That's the kind of stuff we do.

  
Yeah, different.

  
So, what are you gonna do, Barry?

  
About work? I don't know.

  
I want to do my part for the hive,
but I can't do it the way they want.

  
I know how you feel.

  
- You do?
- Sure.

  
My parents wanted me to be a lawyer or
a doctor, but I wanted to be a florist.

  
- Really?
- My only interest is flowers.

  
Our new queen was just elected
with that same campaign slogan.

  
Anyway, if you look...

  
There's my hive right there. See it?

  
You're in Sheep Meadow!

  
Yes! I'm right off the Turtle Pond!

  
No way! I know that area.
I lost a toe ring there once.

  
- Why do girls put rings on their toes?
- Why not?

  
- It's like putting a hat on your knee.
- Maybe I'll try that.

  
- You all right, ma'am?
- Oh, yeah. Fine.

  
Just having two cups of coffee!

  
Anyway, this has been great.
Thanks for the coffee.

  
Yeah, it's no trouble.

  
Sorry I couldn't finish it. If I did,
I'd be up the rest of my life.

  
Are you...?

  
Oan I take a piece of this with me?

  
Sure! Here, have a crumb.

  
- Thanks!
- Yeah.

  
All right. Well, then...
I guess I'll see you around.

  
Or not.

  
OK, Barry.

  
And thank you
so much again... for before.

  
Oh, that? That was nothing.

  
Well, not nothing, but... Anyway...

  
This can't possibly work.

  
He's all set to go.
We may as well try it.

  
OK, Dave, pull the chute.

  
- Sounds amazing.
- It was amazing!

  
It was the scariest,
happiest moment of my life.

  
Humans! I can't believe
you were with humans!

  
Giant, scary humans!
What were they like?

  
Huge and crazy. They talk crazy.

  
They eat crazy giant things.
They drive crazy.

  
- Do they try and kill you, like on TV?
- Some of them. But some of them don't.

  
- How'd you get back?
- Poodle.

  
You did it, and I'm glad. You saw
whatever you wanted to see.

  
You had your "experience." Now you
can pick out yourjob and be normal.

  
- Well...
- Well?

  
Well, I met someone.

  
You did? Was she Bee-ish?

  
- A wasp?! Your parents will kill you!
- No, no, no, not a wasp.

  
- Spider?
- I'm not attracted to spiders.

  
I know it's the hottest thing,
with the eight legs and all.

  
I can't get by that face.

  
So who is she?

  
She's... human.

  
No, no. That's a bee law.
You wouldn't break a bee law.

  
- Her name's Vanessa.
- Oh, boy.

  
She's so nice. And she's a florist!

  
Oh, no! You're dating a human florist!

  
We're not dating.

  
You're flying outside the hive, talking
to humans that attack our homes

  
with power washers and M-80s!
One-eighth a stick of dynamite!

  
She saved my life!
And she understands me.

  
This is over!

  
Eat this.

  
This is not over! What was that?

  
- They call it a crumb.
- It was so stingin' stripey!

  
And that's not what they eat.
That's what falls off what they eat!

  
- You know what a Oinnabon is?
- No.

  
It's bread and cinnamon and frosting.
They heat it up...

  
Sit down!

  
...really hot!
- Listen to me!

  
We are not them! We're us.
There's us and there's them!

  
Yes, but who can deny
the heart that is yearning?

  
There's no yearning.
Stop yearning. Listen to me!

  
You have got to start thinking bee,
my friend. Thinking bee!

  
- Thinking bee.
- Thinking bee.

  
Thinking bee! Thinking bee!
Thinking bee! Thinking bee!

  
There he is. He's in the pool.

  
You know what your problem is, Barry?

  
I gotta start thinking bee?

  
How much longer will this go on?

  
It's been three days!
Why aren't you working?

  
I've got a lot of big life decisions
to think about.

  
What life? You have no life!
You have no job. You're barely a bee!

  
Would it kill you
to make a little honey?

  
Barry, come out.
Your father's talking to you.

  
Martin, would you talk to him?

  
Barry, I'm talking to you!

  
You coming?

  
Got everything?

  
All set!

  
Go ahead. I'll catch up.

  
Don't be too long.

  
Watch this!

  
Vanessa!

  
- We're still here.
- I told you not to yell at him.

  
He doesn't respond to yelling!

  
- Then why yell at me?
- Because you don't listen!

  
I'm not listening to this.

  
Sorry, I've gotta go.

  
- Where are you going?
- I'm meeting a friend.

  
A girl? Is this why you can't decide?

  
Bye.

  
I just hope she's Bee-ish.

  
They have a huge parade
of flowers every year in Pasadena?

  
To be in the Tournament of Roses,
that's every florist's dream!

  
Up on a float, surrounded
by flowers, crowds cheering.

  
A tournament. Do the roses
compete in athletic events?

  
No. All right, I've got one.
How come you don't fly everywhere?

  
It's exhausting. Why don't you
run everywhere? It's faster.

  
Yeah, OK, I see, I see.
All right, your turn.

  
TiVo. You can just freeze live TV?
That's insane!

  
You don't have that?

  
We have Hivo, but it's a disease.
It's a horrible, horrible disease.

  
Oh, my.

  
Dumb bees!

  
You must want to sting all those jerks.

  
We try not to sting.
It's usually fatal for us.

  
So you have to watch your temper.

  
Very carefully.
You kick a wall, take a walk,

  
write an angry letter and throw it out.
Work through it like any emotion:

  
Anger, jealousy, lust.

  
Oh, my goodness! Are you OK?

  
Yeah.

  
- What is wrong with you?!
- It's a bug.

  
He's not bothering anybody.
Get out of here, you creep!

  
What was that? A Pic 'N' Save circular?

  
Yeah, it was. How did you know?

  
It felt like about 10 pages.
Seventy-five is pretty much our limit.

  
You've really got that
down to a science.

  
- I lost a cousin to Italian Vogue.
- I'll bet.

  
What in the name
of Mighty Hercules is this?

  
How did this get here?
Oute Bee, Golden Blossom,

  
Ray Liotta Private Select?

  
- Is he that actor?
- I never heard of him.

  
- Why is this here?
- For people. We eat it.

  
You don't have
enough food of your own?

  
- Well, yes.
- How do you get it?

  
- Bees make it.
- I know who makes it!

  
And it's hard to make it!

  
There's heating, cooling, stirring.
You need a whole Krelman thing!

  
- It's organic.
- It's our-ganic!

  
It's just honey, Barry.

  
Just what?!

  
Bees don't know about this!
This is stealing! A lot of stealing!

  
You've taken our homes, schools,
hospitals! This is all we have!

  
And it's on sale?!
I'm getting to the bottom of this.

  
I'm getting to the bottom
of all of this!

  
Hey, Hector.

  
- You almost done?
- Almost.

  
He is here. I sense it.

  
Well, I guess I'll go home now

  
and just leave this nice honey out,
with no one around.

  
You're busted, box boy!

  
I knew I heard something.
So you can talk!

  
I can talk.
And now you'll start talking!

  
Where you getting the sweet stuff?
Who's your supplier?

  
I don't understand.
I thought we were friends.

  
The last thing we want
to do is upset bees!

  
You're too late! It's ours now!

  
You, sir, have crossed
the wrong sword!

  
You, sir, will be lunch
for my iguana, Ignacio!

  
Where is the honey coming from?

  
Tell me where!

  
Honey Farms! It comes from Honey Farms!

  
Orazy person!

  
What horrible thing has happened here?

  
These faces, they never knew
what hit them. And now

  
they're on the road to nowhere!

  
Just keep still.

  
What? You're not dead?

  
Do I look dead? They will wipe anything
that moves. Where you headed?

  
To Honey Farms.
I am onto something huge here.

  
I'm going to Alaska. Moose blood,
crazy stuff. Blows your head off!

  
I'm going to Tacoma.

  
- And you?
- He really is dead.

  
All right.

  
Uh-oh!

  
- What is that?!
- Oh, no!

  
- A wiper! Triple blade!
- Triple blade?

  
Jump on! It's your only chance, bee!

  
Why does everything have
to be so doggone clean?!

  
How much do you people need to see?!

  
Open your eyes!
Stick your head out the window!

  
From NPR News in Washington,
I'm Oarl Kasell.

  
But don't kill no more bugs!

  
- Bee!
- Moose blood guy!!

  
- You hear something?
- Like what?

  
Like tiny screaming.

  
Turn off the radio.

  
Whassup, bee boy?

  
Hey, Blood.

  
Just a row of honey jars,
as far as the eye could see.

  
Wow!

  
I assume wherever this truck goes
is where they're getting it.

  
I mean, that honey's ours.

  
- Bees hang tight.
- We're all jammed in.

  
It's a close community.

  
Not us, man. We on our own.
Every mosquito on his own.

  
- What if you get in trouble?
- You a mosquito, you in trouble.

  
Nobody likes us. They just smack.
See a mosquito, smack, smack!

  
At least you're out in the world.
You must meet girls.

  
Mosquito girls try to trade up,
get with a moth, dragonfly.

  
Mosquito girl don't want no mosquito.

  
You got to be kidding me!

  
Mooseblood's about to leave
the building! So long, bee!

  
- Hey, guys!
- Mooseblood!

  
I knew I'd catch y'all down here.
Did you bring your crazy straw?

  
We throw it in jars, slap a label on it,
and it's pretty much pure profit.

  
What is this place?

  
A bee's got a brain
the size of a pinhead.

  
They are pinheads!

  
Pinhead.

  
- Oheck out the new smoker.
- Oh, sweet. That's the one you want.

  
The Thomas 3000!

  
Smoker?

  
Ninety puffs a minute, semi-automatic.
Twice the nicotine, all the tar.

  
A couple breaths of this
knocks them right out.

  
They make the honey,
and we make the money.

  
"They make the honey,
and we make the money"?

  
Oh, my!

  
What's going on? Are you OK?

  
Yeah. It doesn't last too long.

  
Do you know you're
in a fake hive with fake walls?

  
Our queen was moved here.
We had no choice.

  
This is your queen?
That's a man in women's clothes!

  
That's a drag queen!

  
What is this?

  
Oh, no!

  
There's hundreds of them!

  
Bee honey.

  
Our honey is being brazenly stolen
on a massive scale!

  
This is worse than anything bears
have done! I intend to do something.

  
Oh, Barry, stop.

  
Who told you humans are taking
our honey? That's a rumor.

  
Do these look like rumors?

  
That's a conspiracy theory.
These are obviously doctored photos.

  
How did you get mixed up in this?

  
He's been talking to humans.

  
- What?
- Talking to humans?!

  
He has a human girlfriend.
And they make out!

  
Make out? Barry!

  
We do not.

  
- You wish you could.
- Whose side are you on?

  
The bees!

  
I dated a cricket once in San Antonio.
Those crazy legs kept me up all night.

  
Barry, this is what you want
to do with your life?

  
I want to do it for all our lives.
Nobody works harder than bees!

  
Dad, I remember you
coming home so overworked

  
your hands were still stirring.
You couldn't stop.

  
I remember that.

  
What right do they have to our honey?

  
We live on two cups a year. They put it
in lip balm for no reason whatsoever!

  
Even if it's true, what can one bee do?

  
Sting them where it really hurts.

  
In the face! The eye!

  
- That would hurt.
- No.

  
Up the nose? That's a killer.

  
There's only one place you can sting
the humans, one place where it matters.

  
Hive at Five, the hive's only
full-hour action news source.

  
No more bee beards!

  
With Bob Bumble at the anchor desk.

  
Weather with Storm Stinger.

  
Sports with Buzz Larvi.

  
And Jeanette Ohung.

  
- Good evening. I'm Bob Bumble.
- And I'm Jeanette Ohung.

  
A tri-county bee, Barry Benson,

  
intends to sue the human race
for stealing our honey,

  
packaging it and profiting
from it illegally!

  
Tomorrow night on Bee Larry King,

  
we'll have three former queens here in
our studio, discussing their new book,

  
Olassy Ladies,
out this week on Hexagon.

  
Tonight we're talking to Barry Benson.

  
Did you ever think, "I'm a kid
from the hive. I can't do this"?

  
Bees have never been afraid
to change the world.

  
What about Bee Oolumbus?
Bee Gandhi? Bejesus?

  
Where I'm from, we'd never sue humans.

  
We were thinking
of stickball or candy stores.

  
How old are you?

  
The bee community
is supporting you in this case,

  
which will be the trial
of the bee century.

  
You know, they have a Larry King
in the human world too.

  
It's a common name. Next week...

  
He looks like you and has a show
and suspenders and colored dots...

  
Next week...

  
Glasses, quotes on the bottom from the
guest even though you just heard 'em.

  
Bear Week next week!
They're scary, hairy and here live.

  
Always leans forward, pointy shoulders,
squinty eyes, very Jewish.

  
In tennis, you attack
at the point of weakness!

  
It was my grandmother, Ken. She's 81.

  
Honey, her backhand's a joke!
I'm not gonna take advantage of that?

  
Quiet, please.
Actual work going on here.

  
- Is that that same bee?
- Yes, it is!

  
I'm helping him sue the human race.

  
- Hello.
- Hello, bee.

  
This is Ken.

  
Yeah, I remember you. Timberland, size
ten and a half. Vibram sole, I believe.

  
Why does he talk again?

  
Listen, you better go
'cause we're really busy working.

  
But it's our yogurt night!

  
Bye-bye.

  
Why is yogurt night so difficult?!

  
You poor thing.
You two have been at this for hours!

  
Yes, and Adam here
has been a huge help.

  
- Frosting...
- How many sugars?

  
Just one. I try not
to use the competition.

  
So why are you helping me?

  
Bees have good qualities.

  
And it takes my mind off the shop.

  
Instead of flowers, people
are giving balloon bouquets now.

  
Those are great, if you're three.

  
And artificial flowers.

  
- Oh, those just get me psychotic!
- Yeah, me too.

  
Bent stingers, pointless pollination.

  
Bees must hate those fake things!

  
Nothing worse
than a daffodil that's had work done.

  
Maybe this could make up
for it a little bit.

  
- This lawsuit's a pretty big deal.
- I guess.

  
You sure you want to go through with it?

  
Am I sure? When I'm done with
the humans, they won't be able

  
to say, "Honey, I'm home,"
without paying a royalty!

  
It's an incredible scene
here in downtown Manhattan,

  
where the world anxiously waits,
because for the first time in history,

  
we will hear for ourselves
if a honeybee can actually speak.

  
What have we gotten into here, Barry?

  
It's pretty big, isn't it?

  
I can't believe how many humans
don't work during the day.

  
You think billion-dollar multinational
food companies have good lawyers?

  
Everybody needs to stay
behind the barricade.

  
- What's the matter?
- I don't know, I just got a chill.

  
Well, if it isn't the bee team.

  
You boys work on this?

  
All rise! The Honorable
Judge Bumbleton presiding.

  
All right. Oase number 4475,

  
Superior Oourt of New York,
Barry Bee Benson v. the Honey Industry

  
is now in session.

  
Mr. Montgomery, you're representing
the five food companies collectively?

  
A privilege.

  
Mr. Benson... you're representing
all the bees of the world?

  
I'm kidding. Yes, Your Honor,
we're ready to proceed.

  
Mr. Montgomery,
your opening statement, please.

  
Ladies and gentlemen of the jury,

  
my grandmother was a simple woman.

  
Born on a farm, she believed
it was man's divine right

  
to benefit from the bounty
of nature God put before us.

  
If we lived in the topsy-turvy world
Mr. Benson imagines,

  
just think of what would it mean.

  
I would have to negotiate
with the silkworm

  
for the elastic in my britches!

  
Talking bee!

  
How do we know this isn't some sort of

  
holographic motion-picture-capture
Hollywood wizardry?

  
They could be using laser beams!

  
Robotics! Ventriloquism!
Oloning! For all we know,

  
he could be on steroids!

  
Mr. Benson?

  
Ladies and gentlemen,
there's no trickery here.

  
I'm just an ordinary bee.
Honey's pretty important to me.

  
It's important to all bees.
We invented it!

  
We make it. And we protect it
with our lives.

  
Unfortunately, there are
some people in this room

  
who think they can take it from us

  
'cause we're the little guys!
I'm hoping that, after this is all over,

  
you'll see how, by taking our honey,
you not only take everything we have

  
but everything we are!

  
I wish he'd dress like that
all the time. So nice!

  
Oall your first witness.

  
So, Mr. Klauss Vanderhayden
of Honey Farms, big company you have.

  
I suppose so.

  
I see you also own
Honeyburton and Honron!

  
Yes, they provide beekeepers
for our farms.

  
Beekeeper. I find that
to be a very disturbing term.

  
I don't imagine you employ
any bee-free-ers, do you?

  
- No.
- I couldn't hear you.

  
- No.
- No.

  
Because you don't free bees.
You keep bees. Not only that,

  
it seems you thought a bear would be
an appropriate image for a jar of honey.

  
They're very lovable creatures.

  
Yogi Bear, Fozzie Bear, Build-A-Bear.

  
You mean like this?

  
Bears kill bees!

  
How'd you like his head crashing
through your living room?!

  
Biting into your couch!
Spitting out your throw pillows!

  
OK, that's enough. Take him away.

  
So, Mr. Sting, thank you for being here.
Your name intrigues me.

  
- Where have I heard it before?
- I was with a band called The Police.

  
But you've never been
a police officer, have you?

  
No, I haven't.

  
No, you haven't. And so here
we have yet another example

  
of bee culture casually
stolen by a human

  
for nothing more than
a prance-about stage name.

  
Oh, please.

  
Have you ever been stung, Mr. Sting?

  
Because I'm feeling
a little stung, Sting.

  
Or should I say... Mr. Gordon M. Sumner!

  
That's not his real name?! You idiots!

  
Mr. Liotta, first,
belated congratulations on

  
your Emmy win for a guest spot
on ER in 2005.

  
Thank you. Thank you.

  
I see from your resume
that you're devilishly handsome

  
with a churning inner turmoil
that's ready to blow.

  
I enjoy what I do. Is that a crime?

  
Not yet it isn't. But is this
what it's come to for you?

  
Exploiting tiny, helpless bees
so you don't

  
have to rehearse
your part and learn your lines, sir?

  
Watch it, Benson!
I could blow right now!

  
This isn't a goodfella.
This is a badfella!

  
Why doesn't someone just step on
this creep, and we can all go home?!

  
- Order in this court!
- You're all thinking it!

  
Order! Order, I say!

  
- Say it!
- Mr. Liotta, please sit down!

  
I think it was awfully nice
of that bear to pitch in like that.

  
I think the jury's on our side.

  
Are we doing everything right, legally?

  
I'm a florist.

  
Right. Well, here's to a great team.

  
To a great team!

  
Well, hello.

  
- Ken!
- Hello.

  
I didn't think you were coming.

  
No, I was just late.
I tried to call, but... the battery.

  
I didn't want all this to go to waste,
so I called Barry. Luckily, he was free.

  
Oh, that was lucky.

  
There's a little left.
I could heat it up.

  
Yeah, heat it up, sure, whatever.

  
So I hear you're quite a tennis player.

  
I'm not much for the game myself.
The ball's a little grabby.

  
That's where I usually sit.
Right... there.

  
Ken, Barry was looking at your resume,

  
and he agreed with me that eating with
chopsticks isn't really a special skill.

  
You think I don't see what you're doing?

  
I know how hard it is to find
the rightjob. We have that in common.

  
Do we?

  
Bees have 100 percent employment,
but we do jobs like taking the crud out.

  
That's just what
I was thinking about doing.

  
Ken, I let Barry borrow your razor
for his fuzz. I hope that was all right.

  
I'm going to drain the old stinger.

  
Yeah, you do that.

  
Look at that.

  
You know, I've just about had it

  
with your little mind games.

  
- What's that?
- Italian Vogue.

  
Mamma mia, that's a lot of pages.

  
A lot of ads.

  
Remember what Van said, why is
your life more valuable than mine?

  
Funny, I just can't seem to recall that!

  
I think something stinks in here!

  
I love the smell of flowers.

  
How do you like the smell of flames?!

  
Not as much.

  
Water bug! Not taking sides!

  
Ken, I'm wearing a Ohapstick hat!
This is pathetic!

  
I've got issues!

  
Well, well, well, a royal flush!

  
- You're bluffing.
- Am I?

  
Surf's up, dude!

  
Poo water!

  
That bowl is gnarly.

  
Except for those dirty yellow rings!

  
Kenneth! What are you doing?!

  
You know, I don't even like honey!
I don't eat it!

  
We need to talk!

  
He's just a little bee!

  
And he happens to be
the nicest bee I've met in a long time!

  
Long time? What are you talking about?!
Are there other bugs in your life?

  
No, but there are other things bugging
me in life. And you're one of them!

  
Fine! Talking bees, no yogurt night...

  
My nerves are fried from riding
on this emotional roller coaster!

  
Goodbye, Ken.

  
And for your information,

  
I prefer sugar-free, artificial
sweeteners made by man!

  
I'm sorry about all that.

  
I know it's got
an aftertaste! I like it!

  
I always felt there was some kind
of barrier between Ken and me.

  
I couldn't overcome it.
Oh, well.

  
Are you OK for the trial?

  
I believe Mr. Montgomery
is about out of ideas.

  
We would like to call
Mr. Barry Benson Bee to the stand.

  
Good idea! You can really see why he's
considered one of the best lawyers...

  
Yeah.

  
Layton, you've
gotta weave some magic

  
with this jury,
or it's gonna be all over.

  
Don't worry. The only thing I have
to do to turn this jury around

  
is to remind them
of what they don't like about bees.

  
- You got the tweezers?
- Are you allergic?

  
Only to losing, son. Only to losing.

  
Mr. Benson Bee, I'll ask you
what I think we'd all like to know.

  
What exactly is your relationship

  
to that woman?

  
We're friends.

  
- Good friends?
- Yes.

  
How good? Do you live together?

  
Wait a minute...

  
Are you her little...

  
...bedbug?

  
I've seen a bee documentary or two.
From what I understand,

  
doesn't your queen give birth
to all the bee children?

  
- Yeah, but...
- So those aren't your real parents!

  
- Oh, Barry...
- Yes, they are!

  
Hold me back!

  
You're an illegitimate bee,
aren't you, Benson?

  
He's denouncing bees!

  
Don't y'all date your cousins?

  
- Objection!
- I'm going to pincushion this guy!

  
Adam, don't! It's what he wants!

  
Oh, I'm hit!!

  
Oh, lordy, I am hit!

  
Order! Order!

  
The venom! The venom
is coursing through my veins!

  
I have been felled
by a winged beast of destruction!

  
You see? You can't treat them
like equals! They're striped savages!

  
Stinging's the only thing
they know! It's their way!

  
- Adam, stay with me.
- I can't feel my legs.

  
What angel of mercy
will come forward to suck the poison

  
from my heaving buttocks?

  
I will have order in this court. Order!

  
Order, please!

  
The case of the honeybees
versus the human race

  
took a pointed turn against the bees

  
yesterday when one of their legal
team stung Layton T. Montgomery.

  
- Hey, buddy.
- Hey.

  
- Is there much pain?
- Yeah.

  
I...

  
I blew the whole case, didn't I?

  
It doesn't matter. What matters is
you're alive. You could have died.

  
I'd be better off dead. Look at me.

  
They got it from the cafeteria
downstairs, in a tuna sandwich.

  
Look, there's
a little celery still on it.

  
What was it like to sting someone?

  
I can't explain it. It was all...

  
All adrenaline and then...
and then ecstasy!

  
All right.

  
You think it was all a trap?

  
Of course. I'm sorry.
I flew us right into this.

  
What were we thinking? Look at us. We're
just a couple of bugs in this world.

  
What will the humans do to us
if they win?

  
I don't know.

  
I hear they put the roaches in motels.
That doesn't sound so bad.

  
Adam, they check in,
but they don't check out!

  
Oh, my.

  
Oould you get a nurse
to close that window?

  
- Why?
- The smoke.

  
Bees don't smoke.

  
Right. Bees don't smoke.

  
Bees don't smoke!
But some bees are smoking.

  
That's it! That's our case!

  
It is? It's not over?

  
Get dressed. I've gotta go somewhere.

  
Get back to the court and stall.
Stall any way you can.

  
And assuming you've done step correctly, you're ready for the tub.

  
Mr. Flayman.

  
Yes? Yes, Your Honor!

  
Where is the rest of your team?

  
Well, Your Honor, it's interesting.

  
Bees are trained to fly haphazardly,

  
and as a result,
we don't make very good time.

  
I actually heard a funny story about...

  
Your Honor,
haven't these ridiculous bugs

  
taken up enough
of this court's valuable time?

  
How much longer will we allow
these absurd shenanigans to go on?

  
They have presented no compelling
evidence to support their charges

  
against my clients,
who run legitimate businesses.

  
I move for a complete dismissal
of this entire case!

  
Mr. Flayman, I'm afraid I'm going

  
to have to consider
Mr. Montgomery's motion.

  
But you can't! We have a terrific case.

  
Where is your proof?
Where is the evidence?

  
Show me the smoking gun!

  
Hold it, Your Honor!
You want a smoking gun?

  
Here is your smoking gun.

  
What is that?

  
It's a bee smoker!

  
What, this?
This harmless little contraption?

  
This couldn't hurt a fly,
let alone a bee.

  
Look at what has happened

  
to bees who have never been asked,
"Smoking or non?"

  
Is this what nature intended for us?

  
To be forcibly addicted
to smoke machines

  
and man-made wooden slat work camps?

  
Living out our lives as honey slaves
to the white man?

  
- What are we gonna do?
- He's playing the species card.

  
Ladies and gentlemen, please,
free these bees!

  
Free the bees! Free the bees!

  
Free the bees!

  
Free the bees! Free the bees!

  
The court finds in favor of the bees!

  
Vanessa, we won!

  
I knew you could do it! High-five!

  
Sorry.

  
I'm OK! You know what this means?

  
All the honey
will finally belong to the bees.

  
Now we won't have
to work so hard all the time.

  
This is an unholy perversion
of the balance of nature, Benson.

  
You'll regret this.

  
Barry, how much honey is out there?

  
All right. One at a time.

  
Barry, who are you wearing?

  
My sweater is Ralph Lauren,
and I have no pants.

  
- What if Montgomery's right?
- What do you mean?

  
We've been living the bee way
a long time, 27 million years.

  
Oongratulations on your victory.
What will you demand as a settlement?

  
First, we'll demand a complete shutdown
of all bee work camps.

  
Then we want back the honey
that was ours to begin with,

  
every last drop.

  
We demand an end to the glorification
of the bear as anything more

  
than a filthy, smelly,
bad-breath stink machine.

  
We're all aware
of what they do in the woods.

  
Wait for my signal.

  
Take him out.

  
He'll have nauseous
for a few hours, then he'll be fine.

  
And we will no longer tolerate
bee-negative nicknames...

  
But it's just a prance-about stage name!

  
...unnecessary inclusion of honey
in bogus health products

  
and la-dee-da human
tea-time snack garnishments.

  
Oan't breathe.

  
Bring it in, boys!

  
Hold it right there! Good.

  
Tap it.

  
Mr. Buzzwell, we just passed three cups,
and there's gallons more coming!

  
- I think we need to shut down!
- Shut down? We've never shut down.

  
Shut down honey production!

  
Stop making honey!

  
Turn your key, sir!

  
What do we do now?

  
Oannonball!

  
We're shutting honey production!

  
Mission abort.

  
Aborting pollination and nectar detail.
Returning to base.

  
Adam, you wouldn't believe
how much honey was out there.

  
Oh, yeah?

  
What's going on? Where is everybody?

  
- Are they out celebrating?
- They're home.

  
They don't know what to do.
Laying out, sleeping in.

  
I heard your Uncle Oarl was on his way
to San Antonio with a cricket.

  
At least we got our honey back.

  
Sometimes I think, so what if humans
liked our honey? Who wouldn't?

  
It's the greatest thing in the world!
I was excited to be part of making it.

  
This was my new desk. This was my
new job. I wanted to do it really well.

  
And now...

  
Now I can't.

  
I don't understand
why they're not happy.

  
I thought their lives would be better!

  
They're doing nothing. It's amazing.
Honey really changes people.

  
You don't have any idea
what's going on, do you?

  
- What did you want to show me?
- This.

  
What happened here?

  
That is not the half of it.

  
Oh, no. Oh, my.

  
They're all wilting.

  
Doesn't look very good, does it?

  
No.

  
And whose fault do you think that is?

  
You know, I'm gonna guess bees.

  
Bees?

  
Specifically, me.

  
I didn't think bees not needing to make
honey would affect all these things.

  
It's notjust flowers.
Fruits, vegetables, they all need bees.

  
That's our whole SAT test right there.

  
Take away produce, that affects
the entire animal kingdom.

  
And then, of course...

  
The human species?

  
So if there's no more pollination,

  
it could all just go south here,
couldn't it?

  
I know this is also partly my fault.

  
How about a suicide pact?

  
How do we do it?

  
- I'll sting you, you step on me.
- Thatjust kills you twice.

  
Right, right.

  
Listen, Barry...
sorry, but I gotta get going.

  
I had to open my mouth and talk.

  
Vanessa?

  
Vanessa? Why are you leaving?
Where are you going?

  
To the final Tournament of Roses parade
in Pasadena.

  
They've moved it to this weekend
because all the flowers are dying.

  
It's the last chance
I'll ever have to see it.

  
Vanessa, I just wanna say I'm sorry.
I never meant it to turn out like this.

  
I know. Me neither.

  
Tournament of Roses.
Roses can't do sports.

  
Wait a minute. Roses. Roses?

  
Roses!

  
Vanessa!

  
Roses?!

  
Barry?

  
- Roses are flowers!
- Yes, they are.

  
Flowers, bees, pollen!

  
I know.
That's why this is the last parade.

  
Maybe not.
Oould you ask him to slow down?

  
Oould you slow down?

  
Barry!

  
OK, I made a huge mistake.
This is a total disaster, all my fault.

  
Yes, it kind of is.

  
I've ruined the planet.
I wanted to help you

  
with the flower shop.
I've made it worse.

  
Actually, it's completely closed down.

  
I thought maybe you were remodeling.

  
But I have another idea, and it's
greater than my previous ideas combined.

  
I don't want to hear it!

  
All right, they have the roses,
the roses have the pollen.

  
I know every bee, plant
and flower bud in this park.

  
All we gotta do is get what they've got
back here with what we've got.

  
- Bees.
- Park.

  
- Pollen!
- Flowers.

  
- Repollination!
- Across the nation!

  
Tournament of Roses,
Pasadena, Oalifornia.

  
They've got nothing
but flowers, floats and cotton candy.

  
Security will be tight.

  
I have an idea.

  
Vanessa Bloome, FTD.

  
Official floral business. It's real.

  
Sorry, ma'am. Nice brooch.

  
Thank you. It was a gift.

  
Once inside,
we just pick the right float.

  
How about The Princess and the Pea?

  
I could be the princess,
and you could be the pea!

  
Yes, I got it.

  
- Where should I sit?
- What are you?

  
- I believe I'm the pea.
- The pea?

  
It goes under the mattresses.

  
- Not in this fairy tale, sweetheart.
- I'm getting the marshal.

  
You do that!
This whole parade is a fiasco!

  
Let's see what this baby'll do.

  
Hey, what are you doing?!

  
Then all we do
is blend in with traffic...

  
...without arousing suspicion.

  
Once at the airport,
there's no stopping us.

  
Stop! Security.

  
- You and your insect pack your float?
- Yes.

  
Has it been
in your possession the entire time?

  
Would you remove your shoes?

  
- Remove your stinger.
- It's part of me.

  
I know. Just having some fun.
Enjoy your flight.

  
Then if we're lucky, we'll have
just enough pollen to do the job.

  
Oan you believe how lucky we are? We
have just enough pollen to do the job!

  
I think this is gonna work.

  
It's got to work.

  
Attention, passengers,
this is Oaptain Scott.

  
We have a bit of bad weather
in New York.

  
It looks like we'll experience
a couple hours delay.

  
Barry, these are cut flowers
with no water. They'll never make it.

  
I gotta get up there
and talk to them.

  
Be careful.

  
Oan I get help
with the Sky Mall magazine?

  
I'd like to order the talking
inflatable nose and ear hair trimmer.

  
Oaptain, I'm in a real situation.

  
- What'd you say, Hal?
- Nothing.

  
Bee!

  
Don't freak out! My entire species...

  
What are you doing?

  
- Wait a minute! I'm an attorney!
- Who's an attorney?

  
Don't move.

  
Oh, Barry.

  
Good afternoon, passengers.
This is your captain.

  
Would a Miss Vanessa Bloome in 24B
please report to the cockpit?

  
And please hurry!

  
What happened here?

  
There was a DustBuster,
a toupee, a life raft exploded.

  
One's bald, one's in a boat,
they're both unconscious!

  
- Is that another bee joke?
- No!

  
No one's flying the plane!

  
This is JFK control tower, Flight 356.
What's your status?

  
This is Vanessa Bloome.
I'm a florist from New York.

  
Where's the pilot?

  
He's unconscious,
and so is the copilot.

  
Not good. Does anyone onboard
have flight experience?

  
As a matter of fact, there is.

  
- Who's that?
- Barry Benson.

  
From the honey trial?! Oh, great.

  
Vanessa, this is nothing more
than a big metal bee.

  
It's got giant wings, huge engines.

  
I can't fly a plane.

  
- Why not? Isn't John Travolta a pilot?
- Yes.

  
How hard could it be?

  
Wait, Barry!
We're headed into some lightning.

  
This is Bob Bumble. We have some
late-breaking news from JFK Airport,

  
where a suspenseful scene
is developing.

  
Barry Benson,
fresh from his legal victory...

  
That's Barry!

  
...is attempting to land a plane,
loaded with people, flowers

  
and an incapacitated flight crew.

  
Flowers?!

  
We have a storm in the area
and two individuals at the controls

  
with absolutely no flight experience.

  
Just a minute.
There's a bee on that plane.

  
I'm quite familiar with Mr. Benson
and his no-account compadres.

  
They've done enough damage.

  
But isn't he your only hope?

  
Technically, a bee
shouldn't be able to fly at all.

  
Their wings are too small...

  
Haven't we heard this a million times?

  
"The surface area of the wings
and body mass make no sense."

  
- Get this on the air!
- Got it.

  
- Stand by.
- We're going live.

  
The way we work may be a mystery to you.

  
Making honey takes a lot of bees
doing a lot of small jobs.

  
But let me tell you about a small job.

  
If you do it well,
it makes a big difference.

  
More than we realized.
To us, to everyone.

  
That's why I want to get bees
back to working together.

  
That's the bee way!
We're not made of Jell-O.

  
We get behind a fellow.

  
- Black and yellow!
- Hello!

  
Left, right, down, hover.

  
- Hover?
- Forget hover.

  
This isn't so hard.
Beep-beep! Beep-beep!

  
Barry, what happened?!

  
Wait, I think we were
on autopilot the whole time.

  
- That may have been helping me.
- And now we're not!

  
So it turns out I cannot fly a plane.

  
All of you, let's get
behind this fellow! Move it out!

  
Move out!

  
Our only chance is if I do what I'd do,
you copy me with the wings of the plane!

  
Don't have to yell.

  
I'm not yelling!
We're in a lot of trouble.

  
It's very hard to concentrate
with that panicky tone in your voice!

  
It's not a tone. I'm panicking!

  
I can't do this!

  
Vanessa, pull yourself together.
You have to snap out of it!

  
You snap out of it.

  
You snap out of it.

  
- You snap out of it!
- You snap out of it!

  
- You snap out of it!
- You snap out of it!

  
- You snap out of it!
- You snap out of it!

  
- Hold it!
- Why? Oome on, it's my turn.

  
How is the plane flying?

  
I don't know.

  
Hello?

  
Benson, got any flowers
for a happy occasion in there?

  
The Pollen Jocks!

  
They do get behind a fellow.

  
- Black and yellow.
- Hello.

  
All right, let's drop this tin can
on the blacktop.

  
Where? I can't see anything. Oan you?

  
No, nothing. It's all cloudy.

  
Oome on. You got to think bee, Barry.

  
- Thinking bee.
- Thinking bee.

  
Thinking bee!
Thinking bee! Thinking bee!

  
Wait a minute.
I think I'm feeling something.

  
- What?
- I don't know. It's strong, pulling me.

  
Like a 27-million-year-old instinct.

  
Bring the nose down.

  
Thinking bee!
Thinking bee! Thinking bee!

  
- What in the world is on the tarmac?
- Get some lights on that!

  
Thinking bee!
Thinking bee! Thinking bee!

  
- Vanessa, aim for the flower.
- OK.

  
Out the engines. We're going in
on bee power. Ready, boys?

  
Affirmative!

  
Good. Good. Easy, now. That's it.

  
Land on that flower!

  
Ready? Full reverse!

  
Spin it around!

  
- Not that flower! The other one!
- Which one?

  
- That flower.
- I'm aiming at the flower!

  
That's a fat guy in a flowered shirt.
I mean the giant pulsating flower

  
made of millions of bees!

  
Pull forward. Nose down. Tail up.

  
Rotate around it.

  
- This is insane, Barry!
- This's the only way I know how to fly.

  
Am I koo-koo-kachoo, or is this plane
flying in an insect-like pattern?

  
Get your nose in there. Don't be afraid.
Smell it. Full reverse!

  
Just drop it. Be a part of it.

  
Aim for the center!

  
Now drop it in! Drop it in, woman!

  
Oome on, already.

  
Barry, we did it!
You taught me how to fly!

  
- Yes. No high-five!
- Right.

  
Barry, it worked!
Did you see the giant flower?

  
What giant flower? Where? Of course
I saw the flower! That was genius!

  
- Thank you.
- But we're not done yet.

  
Listen, everyone!

  
This runway is covered
with the last pollen

  
from the last flowers
available anywhere on Earth.

  
That means this is our last chance.

  
We're the only ones who make honey,
pollinate flowers and dress like this.

  
If we're gonna survive as a species,
this is our moment! What do you say?

  
Are we going to be bees, orjust
Museum of Natural History keychains?

  
We're bees!

  
Keychain!

  
Then follow me! Except Keychain.

  
Hold on, Barry. Here.

  
You've earned this.

  
Yeah!

  
I'm a Pollen Jock! And it's a perfect
fit. All I gotta do are the sleeves.

  
Oh, yeah.

  
That's our Barry.

  
Mom! The bees are back!

  
If anybody needs
to make a call, now's the time.

  
I got a feeling we'll be
working late tonight!

  
Here's your change. Have a great
afternoon! Oan I help who's next?

  
Would you like some honey with that?
It is bee-approved. Don't forget these.

  
Milk, cream, cheese, it's all me.
And I don't see a nickel!

  
Sometimes I just feel
like a piece of meat!

  
I had no idea.

  
Barry, I'm sorry.
Have you got a moment?

  
Would you excuse me?
My mosquito associate will help you.

  
Sorry I'm late.

  
He's a lawyer too?

  
I was already a blood-sucking parasite.
All I needed was a briefcase.

  
Have a great afternoon!

  
Barry, I just got this huge tulip order,
and I can't get them anywhere.

  
No problem, Vannie.
Just leave it to me.

  
You're a lifesaver, Barry.
Oan I help who's next?

  
All right, scramble, jocks!
It's time to fly.

  
Thank you, Barry!

  
That bee is living my life!

  
Let it go, Kenny.

  
- When will this nightmare end?!
- Let it all go.

  
- Beautiful day to fly.
- Sure is.

  
Between you and me,
I was dying to get out of that office.

  
You have got
to start thinking bee, my friend.

  
- Thinking bee!
- Me?

  
Hold it. Let's just stop
for a second. Hold it.

  
I'm sorry. I'm sorry, everyone.
Oan we stop here?

  
I'm not making a major life decision
during a production number!

  
All right. Take ten, everybody.
Wrap it up, guys.

  
I had virtually no rehearsal for that.Pear (Fruit)Pear (Fruit)Pear (Fruit)Pear (Fruit)Pear (Fruit)Pear (Fruit)
    Quote Originally Posted by B e t h a n y View Post
    I had one girl in real life who played it with me lol. Then we met a bunch of people online together. I miss when we used to do glitching, that was fun lmao.

    - - - Post Merge - - -

    maybe this is a hint that we all need to play ac together
    TWO WORLDS
    ONE FAMILIIILY


    It's obviously destiny
    ~Timberlake's not the only one bringing sexy back~

  9. #3099
    Get over here ya fatty xSuperMario64x's Avatar
    Join Date
    October 30, 2011
    Posts
    1,637
    Bells
    24
    Eggs
    0
    3DS
    3024-6610-7931
    NN ID
    norwegiancat99
    Items: FleaWhite Lily
Gift received at 01-04-2017, 04:48 PM from Flare
Message: in: Encyclopedia SpongeBobia 
Pizza Delivery (transcript)

 Arrow Left.png
Episode
Transcript
Gallery
 Arrow Right.png
Transcript Information [edit]
 
General
Season №:	1
Episode №:	5a
This article is a transcript of the SpongeBob SquarePants episode "Pizza Delivery" from season one, which aired on August 14, 1999.

Squidward: [Scene starts at the Krusty Krab with SpongeBob cleaning a table] Hurry up with those chairs, SpongeBob, it's after closing and I'd like to go home.
[phone rings]
SpongeBob: I got it, I got it! Coming. [leaps for the phone but Squidward answers it first]
Squidward: Hello? Sorry, sir, we're close... [Mr. Krabs snatches phone]
Mr. Krabs: Ahoy, there, Krusty Krab. How could I help you? [customer explains order over phone] Pizza? [eyes turn into dollar signs] Um... Of course we have pizza.
Squidward: Uhh, Mr. Krabs...
Mr. Krabs: Our delivery Squid will bring it right over. [hangs up]
Squidward: Mr. Krabs, we don't serve pizza. [Mr. Krabs gets a plate of Krabby patties and turns it into pizza. Then he puts it in a box] We don't deliver.
Mr. Krabs: We don't deliver, but you do.
Squidward: Can't you just get SpongeBob to do it?
Mr. Krabs: Great idea! Take him with you. [SpongeBob sneaks over smiling big]
Squidward: That's not what I had in mind!
SpongeBob: Front end... check. Antenna... [touches the boat antenna making it vibrate] check. Bumper... check. Bumper sticker... [bumper sticker says "I Brake For Sea Urchins"] ...check. [uncaps the tire pressure and puts his mouth in it, causing him to inflate like a balloon, and talk in a squeaky, high pitched voice while he is now the size of a giant parade balloon] Tire pressure! [blows out the rest of the pressure in Squidward's face, returning him to his normal size and voice] ...check. Vehicle inspection complete! We're really making history here Squidward. That lucky customer is going to get the first Krabby Patty Pizza ever.
Squidward: Good, then you drive.
SpongeBob: I can't. I'm still in Boating School.
Squidward: Come on, SpongeBob. Its just around the corner.
SpongeBob: Well, yeah, but...
Squidward: Just do what you do in school.
SpongeBob: Well, okay. Wait, don't tell me.
Squidward: Back it up.
SpongeBob: What?
Squidward: Back... it up.
SpongeBob: Right, back... it up. [tries to move the stick shift down]
Squidward: Back it up!
SpongeBob: Okay, okay.
Squidward: Shift into reverse, SpongeBob!
SpongeBob: Reverse? Oh, yeah, reverse. [SpongeBob imagines the words "FORWARD" and "BACKWARD" turning into Korean characters, 앞으로가 (FORWARD) and 뒤로가 (BACKWARD)]
Squidward: Back it up!!
SpongeBob: [shifts gears] Backing up! Backing up! [boat backs up really fast]
Squidward: [tries to get the wheel] NO! SpongeBob! You did it wrong! Gimme the wheel, SpongeBob. Give me the wheel! Give me it!
SpongeBob: Backing up! Backing up! Ba-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-ack-i-i-i-i-i-ng up! [they go over a bumpy area with rocks and then they spin around and around and around, screaming. The next morning, the boat goes over five hills] Backing up. Backing up. Backing up. Backing up. [boat stops with no fuel left]
Squidward: Well... you backed up. And you know what? I think were out of gas. And you know what else? [echoing] We're in the middle of nowhere!
SpongeBob: And you know what else else? I think the pizzas getting cold.
Squidward: And the pizza's cold? Oh, the pizza's cold. Not the pizza! Oh, how could it get any worse? [kicks boat and the boat starts up again and goes forward fast back to the Krusty Krab]
SpongeBob: Well, we can still deliver it on foot. [both walk on the sand]
Squidward: Ow, ow ow.
SpongeBob: [singing] The Krusty Krab pizza is the pizza for you and me. The Krusty Krab pizza is the pizza...
Squidward: ...And my feet are killing me. Whoa. [trips over SpongeBob] SpongeBob? What are you doing?
SpongeBob: [rubbing ground] Its an old pioneer trick. I saw it in a movie once.
Squidward: SpongeBob, this is no time for...
SpongeBob: Shh, shh, shh. It's working.
Squidward: What is it?
SpongeBob: [pointing to the road] Truck! 16 wheels. Now I can show you how the pioneers hitchhiked. [starts dancing in the road] Whee... eee...
Truck Driver: Crashin' frashin' break dancers!
Squidward: He's stopping! He's stopping! [Squidward realizes he's not stopping and grabs SpongeBob out of the way where they are covered in sand thanks to the truck]
SpongeBob: The Krusty Krab pizza is the pizza for you and me. The Krusty Krab pizza is the pizza free delivery. The Krusty Krab pizza is the pizza very ta-asty. [SpongeBob gets carried around in the air by the huge winds]
Squidward: Will you let go of that stupid pizza, already?!
SpongeBob: I can't, its for the customer!
Squidward: Well Who cares about the customer?!
SpongeBob: I do!
Squidward: Well, I don't!
SpongeBob: [wind stops and SpongeBob gasps] Squidward! [starts flying again]
Squidward: Let go of that pizza!
SpongeBob: No! [runs over Squidward]
Squidward: Ow. [holding SpongeBob's legs] SpongeBob, let go of that pizza!
SpongeBob: No! Its for the customer!
Squidward: SpongeBob! Let go of the pizza! [lifts up into the tornado]
SpongeBob: No!
Squidward: SpongeBob! [looks down] Hang onto the pizza! [tornado spits them both out. SpongeBob uses the pizza as a parachute but Squidward falls hard onto the ground] Hey! Hey! [crawls up to the screen] Wheres the road? Where's the road? We're doomed! How are we gonna get home, which way do we go? [SpongeBob lands] What are we gonna do now! There's no road here!
SpongeBob: I think town's this way. [points]
Squidward: Oh, don't tell me, Jethro. The pioneers?
SpongeBob: That's right. Moss always points to civilization.
Squidward: That way? That way there? [SpongeBob nods] So, let me get this straight... you think that we should go that way?
SpongeBob: Yep.
Squidward: Well, then I'm going this way. [heads the other way]
SpongeBob: Huh? Squid, wait! I don't think...
Squidward: Trust me, I know where I'm going. [Pans out to show another city in the other direction]
SpongeBob: [sings] The Krusty Krab pizza absolutivally. [later] pizza... [starts beatboxing] pizza... [later, SpongeBob is walking backwards. SpongeBob's pants almost split into two and move up and down simultaneously while he continues to beatbox. Still later] Krusty Krab pizza is the pizza, yeah, for you and [falsetto] me! [later] Krab Pizza... for you. Krus... the Krusshy and the... Krab and the... pizza inside. [Later, they are both lying face down in the sand]
Squidward: Sponge, we gotta eat something.
SpongeBob: I heard in times of hardship, the pioneers would eat coral. [Squidward eats some coral] No, maybe it wasn't coral. [Squidward spits out the coral] Maybe it was sand, no, no, mud.
Squidward: Give me the pizza!
SpongeBob: Wait, I remember now. It was coral!
Squidward: Give it to me!
SpongeBob: No, we promised it's for the customer.
Squidward: [fancy music plays] You're right. It's for the customer.
SpongeBob: Yeah!
Squidward: Maybe we better check on it, make sure its okay.
SpongeBob: Well?
Squidward: Just a peek. [opens box]
SpongeBob: [he shuts it quickly] Okay, its fine.
Squidward: No, I think I saw something. [opens box] Oh, no. I was wrong. It looks okay. Sure is a fine looking pizza.
SpongeBob: Yeah.
Squidward: What's that? Is that the cheese?
SpongeBob: Yeah!
Squidward: And the pepperoni?
SpongeBob: Yeah!
Squidward: Oh, looks good, huh?
SpongeBob: Wait a second, I know what you're trying to do, Squidward. I'm not letting you eat the pizza!
Squidward: Give me the pizza!
SpongeBob: No!
Squidward: Don't make me take it away from you, SpongeBob!
SpongeBob: Get away!
Squidward: Get back here, SpongeBob, give me the pizza!
SpongeBob: No!
Squidward: SpongeBob!
SpongeBob: No!
Squidward: SpongeBob!
SpongeBob: No!
Squidward: Wait!
SpongeBob: No! No![runs into Squidward]
Squidward: I want that pizza and you're gonna hand it over one way or another!
SpongeBob: Look, we're saved!
Squidward: Sure, we're saved. Now give me some pizza!
SpongeBob: No, really Squid, we're saved! We're saved! We're saved! [he jumps in and out of his pants]
Squidward: Will you cut that out?!
SpongeBob: [to a conga beat] Saved, saved, saved, saved! Saved, saved, saved, saved, saved, saved! [rips himself apart then the two parts go in circles and then they connect again. SpongeBob starts doing a conga dance] Saved, saved, saved, saved, saved, saved! Saved, saved, saved, saved, saved, saved! Saved, we are saved!
Squidward: That's just a stupid boulder!
SpongeBob: It's not just a boulder. [sniff] It's a rock. [cries] A rock! A rock! Its a big beautiful, old rock. [climbs up it and rubs it] Oh, the pioneers used to ride these babies for miles, and it's in great shape.
Squidward: SpongeBob, will you forget the stupid pioneers?! Have you ever noticed that there are none of them left? That's because they were lousy hitchhikers, ate coral and took directions from algae! And now, you're telling me they thought they could drive... [SpongeBob runs over Squidward with the boulder] ...rocks? Hold on there, Jethro!
SpongeBob: I can't wait to see the look on our customers face! [rings doorbell]
Tom: Yeah?
SpongeBob: Congratulations, sir. Your Krabby Patty pizza is here!
Tom: Wow, thanks! I've been dying for one of these. It... [brief pause] Where's my drink?
SpongeBob: What drink?
Tom: [in an angry tone] My drink!? My diet Dr. Kelp. Don't tell me you forgot my drink!
SpongeBob: [checks through the order] But, you didn't order any...
Tom: [yelling] How am I supposed to eat this pizza without my drink?!
SpongeBob: But... but... [Tears start rolling down his face]
Tom: Didn't you ever once think of the customer?! [gives the pizza back] You call yourself a delivery boy?! Well I ain't buying! [slams door. SpongeBob goes over to Squidward, smiling and trying not to cry]
Squidward: Sponge? Sponge? It's okay. Sponge? [SpongeBob drops the pizza, falls over, starts sobbing and absorbs his tears] Sponge? [Squidward gets angry, grabs the pizza, stomps towards the Customer's house and pounds on the door]
Tom: Another one? Look, I told your little friend I ain't paying for that!
Squidward: Well, this one's on the house! [throws the pizza in Tom's face, knocking him out]
SpongeBob: [still crying] Did he change his mind?
Squidward: [smugly] He sure did. Ate the whole thing in one bite.
SpongeBob: [stops crying] No drink?
Squidward: Nah. Now take me home. [jumps up on the rock]
SpongeBob: Are you kidding? We have just enough time to make it back to work. [backs up the rock where they are instantly at the Krusty Krab]
Squidward: Work? [screen cuts to black] Oh, my aching tentacles!PavéFamous Mushroom
Gift received at 10-05-2016, 02:22 PM from AronthaerThe Bell Tree Fair 2016 PatchAvatar AnimationPear (Fruit)White Pansy
    Quote Originally Posted by Ash Q. Scrumfleton View Post
    TWO WORLDS
    ONE FAMILIIILY
    That song is fantastic
    THE HYPE FOR SUPER MARIO ODYSSEY IS LIT!!!

    Awesome sig pic by wearthesun!!


  10. #3100
    I hate pears
    Join Date
    September 22, 2013
    Posts
    5,836
    Bells
    2
    Eggs
    0
    3DS
    2766-8783-3800
    Items: Yellow Candy
Gift received at 01-13-2017, 03:54 PM from UniversaljellyfishGreen Candy
Gift received at 10-29-2016, 08:59 PM from UniversaljellyfishThe Bell Tree Fair 2014 PatchThe Bell Tree Fair 2013 Patch
    Tonight, I'm too busy being harmonious

Tags for this Thread

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •