What's Bothering You?

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Three different parties in the neighborhood, all playing loud music. It's been going on alllll day.
 
trying to play it cool and all but I think he's really cute ;; we even spent last night watching a movie together c:
o h myg od when he says "I'd love to spend time with you" im dead
 
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I spent hours today grinding levels to get loot boxes for the Overwatch anniversary event. Each one had garbage inside. I did get a lot of goodies from when I dropped some RLC on the event, but it's not nearly enough to getting a quarter of the stuff I want from the event.
 
Woke up today at 8:30, I'm at work now, and then first thing in the morning going to my grandma's house to celebrate her birthday, then maybe coming home for a minute, then going to a barbecue and HOPEFULLY coming home after a few hours of that and be able to take a NAP before coming back into work another 10 hours shift.
 
lmao stuck in this weird ****ing love triangle with a guy and my best friend. i have feelings for the guy but he likes one of my best friends and whenever we hang out now i feel like hes just gonna ask about her and think thats all i'm good for. but when i talked to her about him she said she wasn't interested at all. and we were still friends before he knew we were best friends, but still i'm afraid he'll forget about me if he gets over her. and i have no idea how close i should be getting with him since there have already been awkward times with me and him which were my fault. he knows i'm gay and i hes straight as a line but i don't know why i can't get it through my head that we can't be a thing. and i'm afraid once he does find someone i'll do something bad
 
Lost my new bikini while going home from the beach. Probably on the way from there to the bus or on the bus. Well guess I'll just go buy a new it was only like ~$20 altogether anyways.

Also family/relative dinner tonight.. me mata por favor
 
Applying for a job is hard. I'm getting anxiety looking at the description for every one of them thinking I won't be good enough. I just want to make some of my own money for once. I wish this anxiety would go the **** away and I could build some self-confidence. Really pissed at myself for it.
 
Glad I could go visit people for their birthday's but the few hours socialization was exhausting enough, but with only 2 hours sleep and now 10 hours of work after that too just stick a damn toe tag on me... jfc. And I know I'm going to just make it through work barely, and then as soon as I get home I'll be hit with that evil second wind and wont be able to go to sleep. If I have to I will take a damn sleeping pill because I need to freaking sleep!
 
Avatar limits, can I please find a good pic that wouldn't look like someone is trying to make lemon juice from it o_O
 
i dont want 2 burden any1 w my **** brain but also i really want to tell some1 lol why am i like this and when will i die lol lol haha
 
that it smells like puke here damn old food.

also i burnt like my whole body in the sun yesterday hhh :^)
 
kind of stuck in emotional limbo state. can't keep track of communication with anyone because i get these days where i just physically cannot talk or type to anyone about anything.
feel like the world's worst partner because our relationship is long-distance and constantly inconveniences my other half.
also an emotional damn train wreck because even though everyone's also saying **** like 'you can tell us anything' i know that if i do say what's bothering me, my family will judge me or just say get over it. and i don't want to drag my friends down into the personal hell i wake up to every morning.
my mom is emotionally and verbally abusive and raised me to be a submissive complacent doormat so now that i'm an adult i'm everyone else's doormat and not just hers. and it really sucks.

lmfao i think that's everything on my mind right now thanks
 
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